It’s a quirk of Drag Race recapping that the best episodes of any season are often the hardest ones to recap. Put simply, what is there to say about an hour of world-class drag performances, almost every one of which was executed perfectly?
It’s always fun seeing the eliminated queens return and gauge the temper of the Werk Room before choosing to revisit old grudges. This is such a better format than the old reunion shows, which were seemingly designed to get them all to hate each other. The show has been on too long for any of these queens to be naive or wreckless about this second chance. No one came to settle old scores and virtually every one of the queens said they were happy with their performance this episode. Only two queens had an agenda at hand and they wound up making the episode the fun hour it was.
Everybody looked pretty great walking out, but right from the jump, our eyes went straight to Q and Xunami, both of whom picked ugly, awkward-looking costumes for their lip syncs.
We have no problem with Plane. She played the game well and if anyone took her villain schtick literally or personally, that’s mostly on them (although Amanda Tori is allowed to stay mad). But looking at these three finalists, she really looks like third place to us. It’s a fun look, but it’s not as sickening as Nymphia’s or as fabulous as Sapphira’s. Not that it matters. This was strictly sitting-on-the-couch drag. Nymphia clearly has no throwaway looks in her luggage.
We also really loved the new revamped set design. You can’t see much of it here but we can’t imagine that’s a problem for any of you.
The song selections were pretty good, mostly because some of them were obviously there to throw the queens off or get them to strategize.
This, on the other hand, seemed weirdly complicated because they didn’t have an even number of queens. One skips a level to get to the semi-finals and another skips a level to get to the finals. But like we always say, it’s best not to get too hung up on the idea that Drag Race is somehow a legitimate competition. No episode sells our oft-repeated point that it’s a variety show with cash prizes than this one.
Amanda picked Dawn who picked “Damage” by Danity Kane. We wouldn’t necessarily call this an epic lip sync, but they both worked their asses off. Amanda was more energetic and more connected to the song, with a better costume for a lip sync. She advanced.
Q picked Megami and this is when the episode kicked into high gear. One of our favorite things about an episode like this is that the queens are all really into watching and commenting on the competition, so we got Morphine’s excited observation that Megami picked Janet Jackson “to hinder a bitch.” Q was extremely poorly suited for the song, but the real surprise was just how good Megami was. Unlike Morphine, who made it clear from the start that she needed to win this challenge badly, Megami just quietly reworked her entire image all through the episode.
Morphine picked Geneva who picked the Ava Max song. We were pleasantly surprised by this face-off. They’re so different, but they each reached a commonality as two big-haired blonde latinas in bodysuits that made this feel more like a duet than a competition. Geneva held her own longer than we could have predicted, but once Morphine did that masterful wig reveal, it was all over for Geneva. Having said that, we thought Morphine’s costume was uncharacteristically unflattering on her.
Mirage chose Hershii who chose “Alone 2.0.” Hershii heard about Mirage’s lip sync issues and wisely chose a song with a word-heavy rap, but she was already outclassed. Now we know why Mirage broke down in tears after losing her last lip sync: because the bitch is an assassin who fucked up. She commands that stage and smoked out poor Hershii, who never stood a chance.
The remaining three queens faced off to Kelis’ “Milkshake,” smartly chosen by Mhi’ya, who was perfectly suited to the song. Surprisingly, Plasma came out hard. We wouldn’t say she came close to dominating or winning, but she did much better than we would have thought. Xunami, bless her heart, faded away completely on the stage.
For the semi-finals, Megami and Amanda faced off to Cher’s “Shoop Shoop Song.” What made Megami’s rise through the ranks so much fun to watch was how she used her body to dominate the stage and understood the ancient drag truism that performing is sometimes an emotional thing rather than a kinetic thing. She found ways to interpret every song that were funny and entertaining without relying on flips, dips or splits. This is, after all, a performance, not a gymnastics routine. Megami made Ru laugh and that was all she wrote for Amanda.
Mirage and Morphine faced off to Donna Summer and this was truly an epic lip sync. They tore that stage up. Again, some of the best lip sync challenges are when the two opponents are both so in tune with the emotion of the song that it feels more like a duet. This could’ve gone either way, but Ru chose Morphine. And with that, the episode had its storyline: Morphine and Megami, settling old scores and showing these bitches what they’ve got.
Listen, we like Mhi’ya, but for someone with such a poor track record in the competition, she was getting way too cocky about her chances in the Lalaparuza. We have to admit, we really enjoyed seeing Megami put her down, leading to the first literal jaw drop in ages on our parts. We did not think Ru was going to go that way, but like we said, with Megami in the finals, you had a real story to tell.
NEVER in a million years would we have predicted that a Megami/Morphine LSFYL would be epic, but epic it was. This was Megami’s FOURTH lip sync of the episode, which is reason enough to declare her a champion. The song was “Gonna Make You Sweat” and to be honest, when it started, we thought Morphine was in trouble just because Megami is way more suited to a Martha Wash vocal than she is. Megami was great, but Morphine, perhaps sensing that this might slip away from her…
… went positively feral on that stage. The end result was a killer performance and a result that no one could really argue with.
Megami earned a newly revitalized image and reputation while Morphine earned the win she wanted so badly. According to Drag Race, this was their highest rated episode ever and you know what? You earned it, bitches.
Legendary Children: The First Decade of RuPaul’s Drag Race and the Last Century of Queer Life, a New York Times “New and Notable” pick, praised by The Washington Post “because the world needs authenticity in its stories,” and chosen as one of the Best Books of The Year by NPR is on sale wherever fine books are sold! It’s also available in Italian and Spanish language editions, darlings! Because we’re fabulous on an INTERNATIONAL level.
ALSO: We will be doing a talk and Q&A at the National Arts Club in New York during Pride, where the topic will be drag queens, Drag Race, and queer cultural heroes of history. The details are here. See you there!
[Photo Credit: MTV via Tom and Lorenzo]
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