RuPaul’s Drag Race Finale/Reunion

Posted on April 27, 2010

Darlings, we’ve been staring at our monitor all day trying to come up with the hook for this post and we just can’t. We hate to take this confection of a show so seriously, but the fact remains that we didn’t like the outcome and really didn’t like what it says about the show.

Which isn’t to say we didn’t enjoy the episode. It was still the same campy fun and it put the final dolls through their paces.

Granted, it followed exactly the same format of last season’s finale, with the choreography…

“Lunch” with Aunt Ru…

And the video shoot, but in the end, it seemed like a somewhat joyless affair, which is, we suppose, somewhat fitting since the win went to the least joyful drag queen we’ve ever seen.

Yes, Tyra won it like we said she would a while back, which made this ending a little boring. After all, we all saw it coming from a mile away.

Look, let’s get a couple things out of the way right off the bat.

Tyra is beautiful, no doubt about that.

And despite our soon-to-be expressed complaints, she does have a ton of potential. She can’t sing, she has virtually no charisma and terrible makeup skills, she has no comedy skills either. What she has is a pluckiness and ability to think on her feet, not to mention very good instincts, which is something that Ru responds to.

In the reunion, Ru mentioned a moment during the wedding challenge that sealed it for her: Tyra pulling her veil over her face while crying. Ru thought it was “magic.” We thought it was another in a long line of ploys on Tyra’s part to gain sympathy from the judges.

We hate to say this about Ru because we adore her, but her ego and self-promotion are going to hurt this show in the long run. Now, most who have met Ru would say that she is one of the most open and genuine people one could meet and our all-too-brief chat with her confirmed this to us.

When we say “ego” we don’t mean the clawing, grasping, need to be the most important in the room connotation; we mean the idea that she automatically defaults to rewarding queens that remind her the most of herself.

The fact of the matter is, you could sit Tyra and last year’s winner Bebe down with Ru’s makeup artist and in an hour you’d have two exact Ru doubles without even having to think about it that much. What we’re saying is Ru places all the importance on glamour and beauty and far less importance on talent. If that’s the case, why have a whole season? Beauty pageants only take a couple of hours to do. Save us all the time and pick the prettiest one that reminds you the most of you, Ru.

We’re going to repeat something that’s been all over the twitterverse and commentverse today: We would pay good money to see Jujubee or Pandora perform. We can’t imagine why anyone would pay to see Tyra. What exactly would she do, anyway? Wear outfits? That’s not drag. That’s modeling.

This show has a great opportunity to teach the uninitiated about the world of drag, something that Ru has said to be one of the goals of the show. Well Ru honey, you’re shooting yourself in the foot here. You’re narrowing the definition of drag down. It doesn’t include the fat girls or the funny girls or even the girls with talent. In the end, you keep giving it to the prettiest girl.

There’s a reason why it came down to Raven and Tyra in the end. It’s because Raven is, like Tyra, another version of Ru: statuesque, stylish, and stunningly beautiful.

Also like Tyra, whatever talent she has is not immediately evident. So far as we know, she doesn’t sing or do comedy or anything like that. She makes herself look amazing and that’s it.
Although we would have preferred a Raven win over Tyra simply because Raven has more poise and style and she has more references. She nailed that ’80s look like she nailed almost every other look this season. Tyra doesn’t seem to know anything beyond Beyonce.

It’s no secret that we would have chosen Jujubee to win it. Yes, her runway work was the weakest out of the three…

And in this episode, REALLY weak. We don’t know what the hell she was thinking wearing that bubble-hemmed monstrosity but it did her no favors.

But unlike Ru and Merle and Santino, we don’t place so much importance on the runway stuff because that’s not what drag is about. It’s about personality first and foremost and Jujubee beat out everyone else in the competition on that front, even the much-beloved Pandora, who was technically more talented than Jujubee, but tripped up by her own lack of confidence.

“Do I look fine? If I look fine I’ll keep going.”

That right there is exactly why she should have won. That could be the Drag Queen Credo.

We can understand why Tyra made it so far in the competition without any discernible talent or personality. Yes, her looks were probably the biggest reason, but she definitely has a star quality that explodes whenever a spotlight is put on her. We get why Ru was so fond of her, but in the end, star quality without talent and a likable personality isn’t going to get you far. Tyra has a lot to learn and if she learns it, she really could be a superstar, but the prize shouldn’t be awarded based on potential.

In other news…

The dicks stayed tucked but the claws came out in the reunion.

We don’t know what was more distracting, Tyra’s horrible makeup and plastic boobs…

Or Sonique’s revelation that she’s transgendered. We would have figured on Tati making that announcement. Good for Sonique, though. That is a very painful process to go through, the journey from denial to acceptance. It was brave of her to put it out there.

And CONGRATS TO PANDORA!!!!! Truly the happiest news of the night.

And honey, that outfit is perfection. Had we seen more of that sort of thing during the competition, Santino would have loved you.


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