Girl, That’s Not Your Dress: Amanda Seyfried in Lanvin

Posted on June 04, 2014

Darlings, we present to you the latest in a long line of For Models Only dresses, provided courtesy of the fashion industry.

 

Amanda-Seyfried-Lanvin-2014-Cle-Peu-Beaute-Event-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (1)Amanda Seyfried attends the 204 Clé de Peau Beauté event in Tokyo, Japan in a Lanvin dress paired with Ruper Sanderson heels.

Amanda-Seyfried-Lanvin-2014-Cle-Peu-Beaute-Event-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (2)Lanvin Spring 2014 Collection

Amanda-Seyfried-Lanvin-2014-Cle-Peu-Beaute-Event-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (3)

Amanda-Seyfried-Lanvin-2014-Cle-Peu-Beaute-Event-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (4)

Amanda-Seyfried-Lanvin-2014-Cle-Peu-Beaute-Event-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (5)

Amanda-Seyfried-Lanvin-2014-Cle-Peu-Beaute-Event-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (6)

 

It’s a dress that needs a world-class dress wearer, an artfully lit runway, a pounding bass line and 300 hundred photographers fighting for a picture in order to give it the drama it needs to work. It doesn’t look horrible on her, but she’s not making it sing – and we don’t think that’s her fault. Those sleeves are impossible to make work. They’re kind of magical. They instantly give her the arms of a woman 40 years her senior. We tend to think that wasn’t her goal in picking this dress.

Girl, that’s not your dress. Pack it up and send it back to the model it was designed for. And shame on you for pairing silly putty shoes with it. That just hurts.

 

 

[Photo Credit: Ken Ishii/Getty Images, IMAXTree]

    • MilaXX

      Die lace, die!

      • EveEve

        Can we get an Amen?!

        • decormaven

          Amen, and burn those silly putty shoes.

          • smayper

            Amen to BOTH!

      • Whitney Barkley

        Die mid-calf hem length, die!

        Not as catchy, but it makes me look like a stump.

    • sugarkane105

      The shoes on the the model are my favorite thing in this post.

      • Alyssa

        They are amazing!

      • kimmeister

        Pretending that thing on her microphone is a giant wedge of cheese is my favorite thing.

        • sugarkane105

          “Oh yeah, working with Seth McFarlane was really great… Mmm, brie.”

    • TM

      The top half shines like pleather. It’s making me sad. (I do like the skirt’s shape in theory though.)

    • TinyDynamo

      Plastic lace tablecloth. For the BDSM picnic in the park.

    • Lori

      It’s also too long on her and I have no idea what possessed her to wear those shoes. I know we complain about the nude pump almost every time, and rightfully so, but seriously this deployment is particular nuts.

    • susan6

      Yeah, this is a dress that only looks good on an artfully lit amazon in mid-sashay. It moves very well. Doesn’t stand still very well.

    • CB

      I’m more inclined to say this is a for no one (including models) dress. Really, truly hate it.

    • frannyprof

      The dress is depressing as it is; the shoes take it straight to suicidal.

    • amanda lynn

      awful.

      • Daisy77

        my sentiment exactly. nothing redeeming here, just an ugly dress.

    • Karen Belgrad

      I feel as though the Natural Wildlife Foundation should be hosing her down after whatever horrible oil spill got on her dress….

    • http://www.ellenciompi.com/ NurseEllen

      Take off the sleeves, take off one layer of the skirt, and please wear strappy silver sandals. You might be able to wear it, Miss Amanda, but it’s still questionable.

    • LadyVimes

      I could see Lady Mary in it. She has the eyebrows and the proper bitch face to pull it off.

      • Constant Reader

        I think we had the same sort of idea. Amanda can’t pull off this much edgy; Michelle Dockery could give it a shot.

    • bitchybitchybitchy

      On the runway you can see how movement brings the skirt alive, but even then it’s a really tricky dress to wear. It isn’t doing a thing for Seyfried, and it looks as if she knew that, too.

    • Constant Reader

      I understand a young woman wanting to be edgy, Amanda dear, but when you have the face of an angel, a little edgy goes a long way. This dress is too sleeves that make you look like a heavily-tattooed senior citizen too far. We will not discuss the shoes. Auntie has a weird allergic reaction happening and she’s not in the mood.

    • Mothra

      That’s not anyone’s dress. Unless you’re a garbage can and it is lining you.

    • @Biting Panda

      FPWLUDO
      For People Who Like Ugly Dresses Only.

      • ashtangajunkie

        FPWLUDO has a certain ring to it. :)

    • Anna

      I would’ve preferred to have seen this one on Queen Helen actually, I don’t like it by any means but I think she would’ve pulled this off better than the white one.

      The “just worked out” hair and makeup (or lack thereof) will never cease to befuddle me.

    • Pumps

      She looks like a fancy sister-wife in mourning.

      • smayper

        FTW

      • demidaemon

        I totally got the mourning part, but the sister-wife adds a particular zing, no?

    • Grumpy Girl

      I respectfully disagree, this does look horrible on her. The black drains her natural coloring. The bad hair and makeup is making her head look . . . doughey. And the dress is scary bad.

    • Rhonda Shore

      I beg to differ – it looks awful on her. Only Queen Helen could make this work!!!

    • Sobaika

      Hmm, I think it just needs someone whose body is not as curvy. It needs to be able to hang straight.

    • Danielle

      That dress needs to be in constant motion for it to work. Too shiny and cheap looking otherwise.

    • prisma

      Can someone gather all the Hollywood starlets together and teach them how to stand properly? This pigeon-toed, knocked-kneed little girl affectation that 90% of them insist upon drives me absolutely bananas.

    • lunchcoma

      Helena Bonham Carter must be irritated that she’s had not one, but two, dresses stolen today.

    • Marcella Cypher

      C’mon guys, it’s perfect! She just forgot the mid-calf boots, black lipstick, and–wait, she wasn’t trying to wear a Goth costume?

      Never mind, carry on.

    • teensmom99

      For models or for my ultra-Orthodox Jewish relatives (with lots of lining).

    • Dagney

      Well, I think Florence Welch could have a go at this.

      • poggi

        Interesting. I think you are exactly right. She could pull this off.

      • largishbearishAtlish

        Speaking of, Lords of the BKs, where has been Flo been?

    • Kayceed

      When will Lanvin quit it with the shiny fabrics? I haven’t liked anything from them in ages…

    • Shelby

      I’m less concerned about the sleeves than the shiny fabric. Saran-wrap.

    • MoHub

      Time to shut down Lanvin, Dior, and Chanel until they can live up to the class and vision of their founders.

    • rottenkitty

      She’s not tall enough to pull it off.

    • moppet

      How could that dress possibly be making that little slip of a woman look like she has a thick waistline? If Amanda Seyfried is really that blocky I’ll eat my hat. Amanda, you’re fine, I blame the dress entirely. (And your headsuit could use a little work but Imma let that go)

    • majorbedhead

      It looks like a Gunne Sax dress over a trash bag.

      • ktr33

        PERFECT!

    • jonnyf8

      Whose dress is it. The model obviously suggests Kelly Rowland to me but I’m thinking Uma Thurman. It does need a world class dress wearer for sure.

    • ktr33

      If you’re going to wear a Project Runway failure made out of a plastic grass skirt spray-painted black and a garbage bag, at least go nutso with the shoes — like HBC lace-up high-heeled granny boots or something. “And shame on you for pairing silly putty shoes with it.” YES.

    • alyce1213

      They make cellophane in black? Everything is wrong with this dress.

    • ashtangajunkie

      It’s a totally different dress on the model. It goes instantly depressing on Amanda.

    • TAGinMO

      I think the problem with the sleeves is the high contrast with her skin tone. On a woman of color, like the model, the effect is subtle. But on someone as pale as Amanda, it’s particularly jarring.

    • Snailstsichr

      The shoes are making me weep. I’d rather see Queen Helen in this with orthopedic shoes. Heck. I’d rather see QEII in this with orthopedic shoes.

    • suzq

      This is not a standing still dress. Someone wheel the fan up the stage to move that skirt!

    • Andrea

      The body language says it all!

    • kimmeister

      Her smile in the last photo is lovely and engaging though.

    • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

      Eva Green. K.Stew if the skirt was 2 foot shorter. HBC. Anyone who has a little goth in their wheelhouse. I thought the sash was a more structured, textured cincher on the model, which is a better idea.

      • Amel

        It seems like the model was also wildly throwing out her hip and opposite shoulder to bring some shape and a better line into the bust/torso of the dress. That’s all lost with Seyfried who stands like a normal person (i.e. slightly slouched)

    • Trickytrisha

      I know she has a waist, but that belt/sash is doing its best to hide it. But, dear god, those shoes.

    • FibonacciSequins

      Country goth? I don’t think that’s anyone’s dress.

    • Radish

      This actually depresses me.

    • largishbearishAtlish

      Curtains from a prom circa 1972 dress (I don’t think an unconventional challenge could fix that ‘skirt’), the sleeves give the illusion of tattoos that even Kelly Osborne couldn’t pull off…

    • Laurie Landry

      Oh my! That’s not good!

    • demidaemon

      It’s just kind of an ugly dress. She was doomed the moment it was brought to her.

    • Amel

      Very severe uniboob

    • marlie

      I don’t know if this is FMO, but it’s definitely For Tall Girls Only. The dress is interesting, and has potential, but just on someone else. And not with those shoes. And in 4-6 months.

    • macwell

      No. Just. No.

    • Candice Booth

      It’s dresses like these that make me hate having boobs.

    • http://vhanna26.typepad.com Vera

      This is no one’s dress.

    • Accademia di Moda

      Amanda looks beautiful in this Lanvin gown! I don’t think it would be our first pick for her, but the lace accents a hologram approach are fun and on point with today’s trends!

    • thatch pheasant

      Yikes. Horrible. Who’s her stylist? Vampira?

    • thatch pheasant

      Ain’t got no taste, has she?

    • thatch pheasant

      Explosion in a lace factory. No survivors.

    • Sweetvegan

      From a fit perspective, (not necessarily a design perspective) this dress was obviously made for someone much taller. The sleeves, hem and perhaps the back waist length are too long. That’s the problem with these loaned dresses. You can’t take them off a 6-foot-tall model and put them on an average height person.

    • holla

      I think maybe Florence Henderson can work this?

    • Joey Melliza

      Betty white wants her dress back.

    • http://www.lippsisters.com/ Deborah Lipp

      It doesn’t even work on the model.

    • cocohall

      There is an Italian widow who is also furious that her funeral dress is missing.