Pairs Division: Broderick and Parker

Posted on May 13, 2011

Time once again to check in with Mr. and Mrs. Awkward, kittens! Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker attended New York City Ballet’s 2011 spring gala at the David H. Koch Theater at Lincoln Center, and guess what? They don’t look particularly uncomfortable AND they’re dressed pretty well! It’s a miracle!

Valentino Pre-Fall 2011 Collection/Model: Caroline Brasch Nielsen

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HE: Has obviously been reading us. Hi, Matthew! Well done! You don’t look like a statistics professor with an anxiety disorder! Sure, the tie’s crooked, the jacket still doesn’t fit as well as it should, and the pants are too long, but you have made slight progress in all these areas. And your glasses look cute. You’ll never look flawless, so this is probably the best Matthew Broderick the world’s going to get. Score: 7/10 (Because it’s best to encourage the chronically befuddled).

SHE: Looks good. We think the dress is a little mature, like something an aged society matron would wear, but it’s pretty and texturally interesting and it suits her coloring. We think it worked slightly better as a mini, but we don’t blame her for not going that route because bitchy gay fashion bloggers would then tell her she’s too old to be dressing that way and NO ONE wants that. Two things: it doesn’t really look like something one would wear in May, and we cannot fathom why anyone would need a cross-body bag on a red carpet. It’s just awkward-looking. Score: 8/10.

Combined score: 7.5/10. It’s a sad state of affairs when SJP, the much-lauded fashion icon, can only manage a score one point  higher than  her absent-minded professor of a husband. He did a better job than usual and she was just okay.

[Photo Credit: getty,]

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