Shia LaBeouf for Details

Posted on June 30, 2011

Shia LaBeouf gets the standard guyditorial from Details, along with a feature story so nauseating, we’re not even gonna quote it. We’ll just give you the title: “Shia LaBeouf: Hollywood’s Last Bad Boy.” That’s a story idea that saw its genesis right around the time James Dean’s corpse got cold and a title bestowed on hundreds of actors in the years since, in fawning cover stories just like this one. Go. Read. Enjoy the whole thing. For fun, cross out Shia’s name and put in Colin Farrell’s, or Russell Crowe’s, or Leonardo DiCaprio’s, or Johnny Depp’s, or… you get the idea. Us, we’re gonna look at pictures. That’s where the real story is.

PinJacket from What Goes Around Comes Around. T-shirt by John Varvatos. Pants by Dsquared2.

 

Shia is an adventurous boy hitching a ride on a scenic country road.

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Clothing by HUGO. Boots from What Goes Around Comes Around.

 

Now Shia is the hot redneck who stops to pick him up.

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PinT-shirt by John Varvatos. Pants by Dsquared2. Belt and boots from What Goes Around Comes Around.

 

But then a motorcycle cop comes along! Wow! Details is exactly like gay porn! Who knew? (everybody.)

PinJacket and boots from What Goes Around Comes Around. T-shirt by John Varvatos. Pants by Dsquared2.

 

After months of living on the road, thumbing rides in exchange for oral sex, Shia has developed a drug habit.

PinClothing by Diesel. Boots from What Goes Around Comes Around.

 

Fortunately, simple, clean-living farmer Shia takes him in and helps him clean up.

PinJacket from What Goes Around Comes Around. T-shirt by John Varvatos. Pants by Dsquared2.

 

Now Shia lives the clean, farm life and spends his day staring intently at wheat.

PinShirt by BOSS Black. Jeans by Dior Homme. Chain by Cast of Vices. Belt, his own.

 

Occasionally, redneck Shia stops by to relive old times in the barn. The end.

[Photo Credit: details.com]

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