Darlings, it was another FAT week of red carpet pickins, to which we can only say “Hooray!” To celebrate, let’s get extra-judgy about things!
Alfie Allen in Dior Homme
We really don’t think the shirt goes with the suit at all and we can see way too much of his fly, but it’s a surprisingly cute effort.
Anna Kendrick in Kate Spade New York
We think the dress is great. We also think the super-matchy accessories turn it into doll clothes.
On the one hand, we have to hand it to him for crafting a style persona so unique and so consistently. You don’t see that sort of thing among the guyset all that much. On the other hand, said persona is “Preppy Grandpa Goes Bowling” which strikes us as somewhat limited.
Anthony Mackie and Jamie Dornan
Kiss and we’ll tell you what we think of your outfits, guys.
This is cute, but it also feels a bit like schtick. We admire that she’s got such a consistent look and that she finds so many ways to express it, but sometimes it’s borderline precious and sometimes it goes completely past that border. We’d say either the headband or the shoes, but not both.
You can’t go wrong with some basic Equestrian Chic. Love the pop of color in the bag, but we don’t think the style/size/shape is quite right.
Daniel Craig and Toni Colette
He looks like a handsy bodyguard in surprisingly fun footwear and her top doesn’t remotely go with that skirt.
Elizabeth Debicki in Schiaparelli Couture
It’s not the most exciting gown in the world but she’s so tall and willowy that she can make any piece of draped fabric look epic in its sweep and drama. We can kind of understand why she didn’t think she needed showy jewelry but we sure would’ve loved to see some sparkle.
He looks like the first guy camping out to get tickets for the Joker movie. In other words: fucking yikes.
Isabelle Huppert in Dior Couture
We wish we could say this was working for us. It’s definitely got that old-school glamour feel that works so well for her. But we don’t love the competing metallics and there’s just way too much twisting and ruching going on.
Jamie Lee Curtis
The dress, hair and makeup are fantastic. The shoes are acceptable, of course, but she could’ve opted for something with a little more impact.
He looks like he crawled out of a vat of cologne.
Julia Garner in Kate Spade New York
WOW, we are so not prepared for the super-matchy trend. She can actually pull off a lot of it. The dress is cute and so well-suited to her that we can forgive about 2/3 of the accessories. Any 2/3.
Kate Bosworth in Christopher Esber
They took some hideous fabric and then did some hideous things to it. Fashion!
The color and shape look fantastic on her. We think the combination of plunging neckline and open short sleeve isn’t quite working.
Keri Russell and Matthew Rhys
He’s okay. She’s giving off a serious “Cocktail waitress in a gentlemen’s club” vibe, which is definitely a look. She can even pull it off with seeming ease. But it really doesn’t strike us as particularly stylish.
Kristen Stewart in Bec and Bridge
Newp. Don’t like the color at all. And the shoes just don’t work with it.
Lucy Hale in Michael Kors Collection
Very cute. She’s perfect for this sort of high-gloss costumey sort of fashion.
This dude is closing in on 80 and he still manages to come off effortlessly fresh and of-the-moment without looking tryhard. A true classic.
Serious not-wearing-a-top illusion going on. That aside, this is all surprisingly cute on her. Those shoes are entirely too precious and yet we think she’s just the right type for them.
Sadie Sink in Kate Spade New York
Sweetie, they put you in the wrong color story.
Shailene Woodley in Louis Vuitton
What’s with all the waitress uniforms this week?
Sophie Turner in Louis Vuitton
It’s simple, but she’s working it well.
Taraji P. Henson (with Kelvin Hayden)
They look like the most fun people at the party. We want to sit at their table.
Yalitza Aparicio in Michael Kors Collection
[Photo Credit: INSTARImages, Bernadette Giacomazzo/PR Photos, Getty Images for Michael Kors Collection]