Free Dance Portion
You just know that throughout the whole routine, he was blowing strips of fabric out of his eyes and spitting them out of his mouth. She looks like a giant cat toy.
Cathy Reed and Chris Reed of Japan
Donny and Marie Go Goth.
Christina Beier and William Beier of Germany
A skating tribute to early ’80s video games.
Emily Samuelson and Evan Bates of USA
Honestly? We have nothing to say about the clothes, good or bad. We just wanted to feature his ass on the blog.
Federica Faiella and Massimo Scali of Italy
These costumes are actually quite sweet, but they almost don’t look like costumes at all. Handkerchief hems and sequins, bitches. That’s what the public wants.
Xintong Huang and Xun Zheng of China
OUR EYES! THEY BURN!
Quite possibly the UGLIEST garments we have ever seen.
Original Dance
Alexandra Zaretsy and Roman Zaretsky of Israel
She’s a hotel maid! He’s a bartender! Together…THEY SKATE!
Chris Reed and Cathy Reed of Japan
You know how Disney basically takes every one of its animated movies and turns it into an ice-skating extavaganza to milk parents of their money because their kids beg for tickets? Well, now it’s the grownups’ turn! Coming this spring, a new, adult form of ice show:
MEMOIRS OF A GEISHA — ON ICE!
From the people who brought you “Schindler’s List — ON ICE!” and “The Exorcist Water Show!”
Dmitri Soloviev and Ekaterina Bobrova of Russia
Okay, now they’re just fucking with us.
Luca Lanotte and Anna Cappellini of Italy
Let’s play Guess the Routine. This is the story of a kindhearted waitress in a Bavarian-themed restaurant and the poor Mexican busboy who loved her from afar.
Are we close?
Nathalie Pechalat and Fabian Bourzat of France
“Owdee, Partneur! Zis is my, how you say, ‘rodeo slut?”
Nicholas Buckland and Penny Coomes of Great Britain and Northern Ireland
Little-known T Lo fact: Tom was a gold medal Irish step-dancing champion when he was ten years old. This means two things:
1)He was clearly gay from conception, and
2)He can’t bring himself or allow Lorenzo to make fun of these Frozen Riverdance costumes.
Oksana Dominina and Maxim Shabalin of Russia
We’re sorry, but it is HILARIOUS how completely insensitive and unaware they are. Every time we see him pulling her hair and she’s got that big stupid grin on her face, we fall out of our chairs laughing.
Sinead Kerr and John Kerr of Great Britain and Northern Ireland
Dear America,
The British think your women are sluts.
Tanith Belbin and Agosto Benjamin of USA
Sweet Motherfuckall.
Wait. It’s a joke, right? They’re deliberately parodying ugly Eastern European costumes, right? They deserve a medal just for wearing that in public.
Xun Zheng and Xintong Huang of China
Are these two actively TRYING to singlehandedly destroy the apparel industry in China?
[Photos: gettyimages.com]
Labels: Figure Skating
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RuPaul’s Drag Race: Blood on the Catwalk!
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