Uh-Oh! Crazy gays are trouble in any social setting (trust us on this one), but when your crazy gay is backed up against the wall and has run out of his anti-psychotic medication, look out! That bitch’ll do anything! She CRAZY!
It seems that no matter what, the secret of the Graysons and David Clarke is just dying to get out somehow. The writers tossed Lydia off a building after she started waving that speech around, but like Lydia herself, that little piece of paper can’t easily be destroyed. Little psychogay Tyler is now using Lydia’s speech to secure his job at Grayson and just stumbled upon a career-making blackmail video, the result of which can only be Tyler’s death (Is it him on the beach at the end of the summer?) or the reveal of the Grayson’s scandal to the world. Which sounds more likely? Emily should probably just consider sitting back and letting things unfold because with this crowd, any one of whom would easily stab the others in the back to get what they want, maybe the best revenge is to let them all destroy themselves.
And this is, of course, one of the major themes of the show; that venal, amoral people will destroy themselves given enough time. It’s a lovely sentiment and the fact that the show relies on it so much is a huge reason for its success (and the success of its grandparents, Dallas and Dynasty). In short: we want to believe that people who have so much more materially than we do must be leading the unhappiest of lives that will surely end disastrously. Even shorter: the public just loves watching the rich get screwed.
But then the other major theme of the show is that revenge can destroy the avenger as much as it can destroy those its wielded against. Emily’s Revenge Sensei thinks she’s playing a dangerous game here and that she’s fallen in love with Daniel. She assures him that she hasn’t and we know we’re supposed to believe that she still has feelings for Jack, but of the two, it’s Daniel with whom she shares major chemistry. Jack just gets the Sweet Guy treatment from her (As in, “He’s a sweet guy, but…”). Daniel clearly gets her motor running. Underlying Emily’s machinations is a couple of unpleasant truths about her, one of which is that she’s turned into something of a snob without realizing it. She walks smoothly through the world of the Graysons but comes off quite condescending in Jack’s world. We think this is at least partially why Ashley has turned against her. Even with her, Emily has always come off a little snooty and that more than anything has fueled Ash’s vicious desire to get out of servitude and move into the mansion where she belongs.
Anyway, it’s always two steps forward, one step back in the revenge game. Emily thought she found a way to get rid of Tyler, but she didn’t count on the desperation of a psychotic gay with his back up against the wall, and all she really managed to do was tip her hand and ruin her relationship with Nolan, the only person who’s been on her side through this whole thing. If Tyler doesn’t know already that she was the one who revealed his secrets to Daniel, he will soon. And how exactly did she manage that one anyway? What was her reason for knowing that Nolan and Tyler slept together?
And poor Nolan. We’d happily accept his offer to jet off to Monte Carlo. He can get over his loneliness by oiling his abs and spending money on us.
On the other “pain in the ass” front, Emily’s plans for Fauxmanda seem to be bearing fruit. That tacky little girl was never going to manage to keep her mouth shut and, Emily knew, neither would Jack. She was, in fact, counting on Jack’s long-held torch for her to be the tool to help take down Fauxmanda, so she ensured that Fauxmanda had all the info she needed to continue the charade, essentially digging her own grave. Girl is COLD. But brilliant, we have to say, because Victoria Grayson now thinks that Amanda Clarke is back in town and shacking up with Jack. Expect an “I WILL DESTROY YOU” moment soon.
As for the Hamptons’ resident Queen B-for Bitch, it seems she’s stopped feeling sorry for herself and is ready to take her husband to the woodshed. But here’s our question: Is the guy she hired actually working for Emily? Did we read those last scenes right? Because there’s no way he won’t recognize her if he sees her. Is Emily so devious that she’s even managed to get Victoria’s divorce lawyer on her payroll before Victoria did? That girl is good. Cold; maybe a little crazy; but damn, does she know how to plot and scheme.
Also, Kung Fu! We’re looking forward to seeing her beat little Tyler to a bloody pulp some day.
[Photo Credit: ABC]