Joe Jonas at the Louis Vuitton Spring 2015 Fashion Show

Posted on June 27, 2014

Hipster fashion twink. With a potato in his pants. We figured we might as well just lay it all out there before you got to the scrolldown.

 

Joe-Jonas-Louis-Vuitton-Spring-2015-Fashion-Show-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (1)Joe Jonas attends the Louis Vuitton Spring 2015 fashion show in Paris, France.

Joe-Jonas-Louis-Vuitton-Spring-2015-Fashion-Show-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (2)

Joe-Jonas-Louis-Vuitton-Spring-2015-Fashion-Show-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (3)

Joe-Jonas-Louis-Vuitton-Spring-2015-Fashion-Show-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (4)

 

BOYSTYLE RULE: When your pants pockets start “Mickey Mousing,” it’s a sign you need to go up a size or have them let out.  Truthbomb, bitches. Also: rein in that potato there, son.

Also-also: those shoes seem kinda wrong for the rest of the look. They’re blandly conservative; like something you’d wear with a job interview suit.

But we’re LIVING for that jacket.

 

 

 

[Photo Credit: CHP/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES]

    • RussellH88

      That’s a total “I know, right?” look on his face.

      • Danielle

        I laughed out loud. Tooootally nailed it.

      • Raspberry2012

        And it made me laugh so hard! Just so SURE of himself, so pleased. And goodness if he could read our minds – he’d scoot behind the sofa like a dog and we’d never see him again!

    • James

      He irritates me so much. I love the jacket but not on him. Also I prefer my potatoes mashed.

    • Cyprienne Zed

      Cognac shoes, please.

    • @Biting Panda

      Isn’t he a bit young for prostate and testicular problem? I know some of the senior men look like some Dirk Digglers walking around here, but they are experiencing a medical situation. Yikes, Jonas, seek out a professional.

      • Lisalady161

        OMG, best response possible!

    • Glam Dixie

      Overstuffed Sausage Friday! I really like the dotted shirt he has on and if this fit him it would all be kinds of dorkily cute.

    • Tracy_Flick

      Joe Jonas still needs half a dozen bodyguards? Huh.

      • KateShouldBeWorking

        I can’t be the only person who kinda wants to punch the smug off his face. Maybe that’s why there are so many body guards.

      • http://vhanna26.typepad.com Vera

        That was my second thought.

    • MilaXX

      Jacket is really cute. I want it. Pants too small. Shoes too dress. They belong with a banker suit.I get they wanted a sort of nerd look, but a pair of brown wingtips might have gone better and still had that same vibe. Better yet a pair of navy vans.

      • evave2

        MilaXX I like the jacket too, but doesn’t it also look too small? I am unsure, are pants about 1/2″ to 1″ too short now fashionable? I like the shoes and because the rest of it looks just a little off I like them more perhaps than I should.

        • MilaXX

          I think the jacket fits because he can zip it. The pants are not only too short, they are pulling across his thigh /groin area which is why TLo called his pocket Mikey Mouse ears.

      • FuhUgh

        The pants are giving him “chunky college co-ed thighs.” And, he’s a creep.

    • Latin Buddy

      Sorry, as a gay-boy myself, number one rule: don’t wear something that makes you look fat.

      That jacket balloons out and makes him look wide. While I appreciate the thick man-thigh, I also agree that going up a size would help with the pockets.

    • nannypoo

      Great jacket, but otherwise this is kind of pathetic.

    • snarkykitten

      say what? that jacket looks like a slightly more fashionable version of what every grandpa has in his closet.

      • formerlyAnon

        EXACTLY my viewpoint. But that’s in style now, so my outdated perception is out of step, I admit.

    • Jennifer Peters-Ahnberg

      Even a vienna sausage looks bigger in too tight casing. Just saying.

    • Emily Smith

      I feel like all of this should be on Darren Criss when he’s character for glee. Except it would have better shoes.

    • LadyVimes

      Is he out?
      Love the glasses, but that’s about it. Everything he’s wearing looks too small.

      • Tess Tea

        My thoughts exactly.

    • http://www.snoskred.org/ Snoskred

      You just know the theme song playing in his head is.. I’m.. too sexy for my shirt.. too sexy for my shirt, so sexy it hurts..

      I’m a model, you know what I mean, and I do my little turn on the catwalk.. :)

      • Wink

        How about… “I like big butts, and I cannot lie…”

    • Kitten Mittons

      Joe, you look like you have lady hips. Stop being so pleased with yourself.
      The smug is strong with this one.

      • Wink

        Serious lady hips in the first two pics.

        • Kitten Mittons

          I didn’t even notice the potato the first time through, because of them. That and the very thick cloud of smug.

    • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

      Double zippers like that jacket bug me inreasonably.

    • Mothra

      “A” potato? I think there’s a whole fast food fryolater’s worth of potato in there.

    • WendyD

      I just CAN’T with the zipper on that jacket. The t-bar at the top and then the bottom also unzipped? CAN’T unsee and CAN’T stand.

    • jilly_d

      LOL NO

    • decormaven

      I feel like a tiny ship should be floating atop that wavy hair.

      • formerlyAnon

        Hahahaha!

    • Shawn EH

      Is that a preventative hand keeping him from reaching for the microphone? “Musn’t touch, Little Jonas!”

    • http://gabyrippling.tumblr.com/ Gaby

      Gross.

    • demidaemon

      It’s kind of cute, actually. But does he have some major boyhips? Or is that just the effect of the too small pants. Also, what a big potato you have there, sir.

      • t bell

        Boyhips, that’s the term I was looking for.

        • demidaemon

          After seeing ladyhips in the comments, i wasn’t sure, but you have helped me to affirm the term. Boyhips it is.

    • FibonacciSequins

      The jacket is pretty great. I think overall this is a good look for him, especially the hair and glasses. But I don’t care how big a potato he has in his pants, he will always seem like a little boy to me. Cannot take seriously.

    • rkdgal

      The zipper pull makes it look like he’s wearing a large cross necklace, which in turn makes him look like a wanna-be hipster on his mission trip.

    • KateShouldBeWorking

      Relax there, Joe; no one’s buying what you’re selling. Quit for today and grab yourself a cocktail.

    • KinoEye

      Pop that hip, gurl. Be sassy for the cameras. He looks like the kind of guy you’d encounter at a college party who would engage you in a conversation and chuckle with disdain when you say you aren’t familiar with some obscure bit of pop culture. “Oh, Apocalypse Now is a great film. But it just wasn’t at the level of Aguirre:The Wrath of God. Oh? You haven’t seen it? Well. Not everyone can be so cultured.”

      • formerlyAnon

        Oh my god. My eventual-film-major high school boyfriend worshipped at the altar of Aguirre: The Wrath of God. (This was in nineteen seventy-mumble). We lasted through a year of college, but the fact that I never felt the slightest desire to see the film despite his passion was probably writing on the wall that I was too young to recognize.

        • KinoEye

          Haha! I discovered that movie while working towards a film minor. That one seems to be a mainstay for “serious” film students, even decades later :-)

    • suzq

      Louis Vuitton had horrible shoes in their collection. D&G, on the other hand, had delicious shoes. Joe should get a pair of those…and bigger pants.

    • Mona_Visa

      I wanna push him into the dirt and mess up that perrrrfectly buttoned shirt. Let’s see what you’ve *really* got, kid.

    • MK03

      Between him and the “Mickey Mousing” comment, all I can think of is the South Park episode with the Jonas Brothers. “No, Mr. Mouse…”

    • Courtney

      You can just feel the pretentiousness radiating off the screen, can’t you?

    • Snailstsichr

      Where are your socks? I am grossed out — I had to look somewhere (anywhere) else but at the potato farm and my eyes fell to his feet.

    • t bell

      Despite the potato he just doesn’t do it for me; I’m sure that he would be relieved to know that.

    • Dino Bonačić

      he looks fat.

    • FridaStaire

      I think he’s packing! (‘Packing’ – old school lesbian term for secreting an artificial lady-pleaser in your pants).

      • E_bee

        OH! Secret-ing.

    • Anglow

      Why does he have a little red rubber band around his right wrist? Or string.

      • icm

        Don’t scientologists wear a red string around their wrists?

      • Kristin McNamara

        I thought it was a Kabbalah bracelet. (I remember learning about what that was from early 2000s Madonna.)

    • frannyprof

      He’s trying like hell to sell that look, but I’m not buying it.

    • KT

      HAHA. He looks totally ridiculous. But color me surprised by the potato in there. It must be a potato, right? I refuse to believe that Joe Jonas is packing heat.

    • Man Dala

      Give him a bible and he’ll visit you door to door.

    • boweryboy

      The jacket looks a skosh too small. I do, however, want to see his potato.

    • dash1211

      He’s trying too hard, and he’s not even cute.

    • Kent Roby

      That Joe; he’s such a Hamm!

      • formerlyAnon

        Good one.

    • quiltrx

      I’ve decided he doesn’t deserve that jacket! Plus, stank shoe.

    • http://www.bertkeeter.com Bert Keeter

      PLEASE…enough with the shoved up sleeves ala “Don Johnson in MIAMI VICE”.

    • ktr33

      Agree with @bertkeeter:disqus My GOD, pushed up sleeves?? It’s not a bad hipster nerd impersonation. Unzip the jacket, put on some dark wash cuffed jeans, and maybe suede wing tips, and then I don’t mind it. But that’s a lot of switch-ups. Agree @boweryboy:disqus – jacket needs a size up.

    • ktr33

      p.s. I don’t think any of those bros. are cute.

    • YoungSally

      Is the zipper pull intentionally designed to hang so the overall effect is that of a zip-away rosary?

    • formerlyAnon

      I kinda hate this ensemble. But then, I don’t think he’s sporting it for the benefit of the likes o’ me.

      The hair and glasses combined are pretentiously dopey, the pants don’t fit, the shoes are nice but drag the jacket down to “going into the office on Saturday” rather than “styling young man about town, in casual guise.” And I don’t love the jacket, either. But it’s o.k.

    • Jen

      Trying very hard there.

    • LuisaNL

      hipster pee wee herman.

    • kimmeister

      The hair and glasses are very Clark Kent.

    • fromanotherplanet

      The pants don’t flatter his legs — they make him look lumpy and weirdly shaped. The clunky shoes are also a no-no. Like you guys, I live for the jacket.

    • lovelygamour

      I think he represented the look well. If you bought the outfit this is what it would look like worn about.