2011 Teen Choice Awards Red Carpet – Part 1

Posted on August 08, 2011

Who’s ready to feel old and out of touch? YOU ARE, kittens! It’s the 2011 Teen Choice Awards and a bunch of people with really silly names hopped up on the red carpet because they’re finally tall enough to get on this ride. Let’s puncture some self-importance together, shall we?

Ashley Benson

The collar’s a bit too high for that mane of hair (should’ve worn a pony tail), but it’s a great, sassy, eye-catching dress.

Avril Lavigne in Abbey Dawn

Love the shoes, but the dress came off a Bebe mannequin.

Ayla Kell

How thoughtful that they invited some old hoofer from Hollywood’s golden age.

What? This person was born in the ’90s? Does she realize she doesn’t have to dress like this?

Blake Lively in Gucci

Her red carpet posing makes our eyes twitch, but we can’t deny the gal looks fierce and sharp here.

Chris Hemsworth

Good enough. He no longer looks like a gorilla in a suit, so he must be cycling down.

Crystal Reed

Hi, Crystal Reed. You don’t know us, but we think you should know there’s too much shit on your dress and your shoes look ENORMOUS.

Darren Criss

Enh. Bored now.

Destinee Monroe and Paris Monroe

We are so thrilled there are little blonde pupal attention whores named Destinee and Paris Monroe. We just know these girls will give us many years of fun ripping their dresses and tearing down their delusions of grandeur. It’s like we’re looking at our retirement fund right now.

They look like they beamed down from space and landed in 1988.

Fergie in Dolce & Gabbana

We’re pretty over the star-spangled looks, but this is perfect for the event. Mind you, she looks like she can’t breathe in this thing, but that’s only a minor problem when pursuing fabulous.

Holland Roden in Donna Morgan

Cute dress in a great color.

Ian Somerhalder

Service entrance is in the back.

Joe Jonas in Z Zegna

He looks like a middle-aged high school teacher trying to look hip.

Kat Graham in Falguni & Shane Peacock

No revolving doors for Miss Graham, please.

Kim Kardashian in Givenchy

She looks like a pissed-off dust ruffle.

Mary Murphy

Whoever thought Catholic schoolgirl outfits in leather was a good idea needs to be driven out to the desert and left there. We’re pretty sure Mary Murphy agrees right about now.

Nina Dobrev in D&G

Cute, if a little Candy Striper.

Raven-Symone

Raven is thrilled to be here and thrilled that she got someone to cover her shift at the bank.

Rebecca Black

Weep for the future of humanity

It’s not a bad dress, though.

Rupert Grint

Dude, you’re rich and you’re presumably trying to get laid. Put a little effort in.

Shay Mitchell in DKNY

It’s a great look; sexy, sparkly and cute.

Taylor Lautner

100 percent pure, raging heterosexuality.

Tyler Blackburn

Go home, you lazy shit. But leave your shirt because we kind of like it.

Tyra Banks in Thierry Mugler

Well look who just joined the X-Men! Smizing isn’t a super-power, dear.

[Photo Credit: Jason Merritt/Getty Images]

    • http://twitter.com/LianaBrooks Liana Brooks

      Who are the Monroes, and why is someone in a leather jumper? Feathers, and stars, and dust ruffles… my eyes hurt. Who thought any of this was a good idea?

    • http://twitter.com/LianaBrooks Liana Brooks

      Who are the Monroes, and why is someone in a leather jumper? Feathers, and stars, and dust ruffles… my eyes hurt. Who thought any of this was a good idea?

      • Anonymous

        “Leather jumper” reminded me of “leather apron,” one of the men suspected of being Jack the Ripper…just me?  *goes back to being a nerdy librarian*

        • Anonymous

          Didn’t someone on PR do a leather apron/jumper at some point? And I think Chloe had some leather dresses in a collection not too long ago…I never understood it, as I tend to think that ANY garment rendered in leather (besides a jacket or *maybe* a pair of fabulous skinny pants) brings butchers to mind…especially if it’s that particular shade of brown…

          • Anonymous

            If you’re going to do a leather garment at least have it be well fitted, not just hanging there like…well, like an apron.

      • Anonymous

        “Leather jumper” reminded me of “leather apron,” one of the men suspected of being Jack the Ripper…just me?  *goes back to being a nerdy librarian*

      • http://www.facebook.com/CatherineKatz Catherine Katz

        I can’t believe I actually know who the Monroes are, but…  

        So I watch the Laurie Ann Gibson dance series on E (don’t judge me) – and they are one of her “artists” she was “showcasing” this past year.  That they are here probably means they were signed to some label.  

      • http://twitter.com/meg_a_wo_man Megs

        I googled them, their facebook page  is one of the first hits “Destinee and paris are amazing singers, and they are awesome people too.”

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_5WKLKGER4FZ7MJX43OSYDBDPOE Maggie

      He’s rich and famous. He’s going to get laid whether he puts any effort into it or not. But it would have been nice if he had.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_5WKLKGER4FZ7MJX43OSYDBDPOE Maggie

      He’s rich and famous. He’s going to get laid whether he puts any effort into it or not. But it would have been nice if he had.

    • Anonymous

      Holland’s dress is a great color, but I feel like I’m about to do a gyno exam on her if a breeze happens to flit by.  Love the first dress, but wish it was a schoch longer and that the hair had been put up. Ian Somerhalder is so good looking above the neck I’m tempted to forgive the awful ensemble…but what’s w/ Ron Weasley? He is consistently disgusting looking.

    • Anonymous

      Holland’s dress is a great color, but I feel like I’m about to do a gyno exam on her if a breeze happens to flit by.  Love the first dress, but wish it was a schoch longer and that the hair had been put up. Ian Somerhalder is so good looking above the neck I’m tempted to forgive the awful ensemble…but what’s w/ Ron Weasley? He is consistently disgusting looking.

      • http://bfish.myopenid.com/ bfish

        She look like she’ (rightly) holding on it for dear live. The only question is whether the wardrobe malfunction will be up or down.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QFW22QV426LUOEPGASPZJWJMDE MishaFoomin

      Joe Jonas: pants to tight in the crotch! Maybe if the pants were a darker color and less shiny, things would be less noticeable…

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QFW22QV426LUOEPGASPZJWJMDE MishaFoomin

      Joe Jonas: pants to tight in the crotch! Maybe if the pants were a darker color and less shiny, things would be less noticeable…

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jo-Ollier/510910387 Jo Ollier

      Mary Murphy’s dress looks like some kind of butchers/welders/shoe smiths apron

      • Anonymous

        Exactly.

      • Anonymous

        Exactly.

      • http://profiles.google.com/vispreeve Daniel Vispreeve

        Yes! She looks like she’s ready to slaughter a pig.

      • Anonymous

        It looks like Dexter’s killing apron.

    • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jo-Ollier/510910387 Jo Ollier

      Mary Murphy’s dress looks like some kind of butchers/welders/shoe smiths apron

    • Anonymous

      Mary Murphy’s looks like something Buffalo Bill would design.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Charlotte-Henßen/708157034 Charlotte Henßen

        She looks like she’s wearing a carseat.

      • Anonymous

        “It rubs the lotion on its skin, or else it gets the hose again.”

      • http://twitter.com/jc_parsons Jillian Parsons

        That is exactly what I thought too, and the matching shoes only contribute to the creepiness.

    • Anonymous

      “Service entrance is in the back” made me laugh, but my favorite was “pissed off dust ruffle”.  Love!  

    • http://twitter.com/theorymeg Megan K.

      Blake Lively looks amazing!!  And someone should tell those twins?/sisters? that they don’t have to wear matching outfits anymore.

      • Anonymous

        blake does look good, but she is just so orange…..

    • Anonymous

      Kim Kardashian looks like the feather duster/french maid in Disney’s Beauty and the Beast. Fergie looks like a waitress at a futuristic truck stop.  Awful hair and all I see is her left boob. 

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Christina-McMorrow/1185310293 Christina McMorrow

        I was totally going to say that about Kim Kardashian!! SO excited someone else saw that! 

    • http://twitter.com/bredalot Breda Smith

      Aw, Ayla Kell cleans up really nice on Make It Or Break It! There have been some moments on that show where I catch my breath and go, “Holy crap, she’s GORGEOUS.” Too bad whoever dressed her here fell down on the job so badly.

      • Anonymous

        Thanks for reminding me why she looks familiar.  She should fire the person who talked her into that dress, she’s way too pretty to look that dowdy.

    • http://phdoula.blogspot.com Rebecca

      I actually kind of love the Destinee + Paris oufits! The space + 80s = fun “Jetsons” look.

      The leather jumper…the mind BOGGLES. Did she lose a bet?

      • Anonymous

        But they probably born after the 80′s so there is no irony to it, just bad taste.

    • http://www.katymcdermott.com KatyMightHave

      If Rupert Grint combed his hair, shaved off that scruff, and maybe wore a suit now and then, he’d be quite a handsome young man. (Oh, and get off my lawn.)

    • Terence Ng

      What happened to Joe Jonas? He used to be so cute…Now he looks like he directs pornos in his apartment.

      And I like that the length on Darren Criss’ pants makes it look like his right leg suffered a pixelation disjoint.

      • Anonymous

        SO right!  You make me snort out loud with “the porno in his apartment” line!
        Thanks!

      • Anonymous

        I think Joe just might do that, ala Rob Lowe in the late 80′s….

    • Heather Kaplin

      Nina Dobrev’s makes my head hurt….

      • Shawn Hill

        But still very pretty; and not so small, she’s quite the tall girl.

    • Isa Brandão

      Fergie looks like Tyra’s sidekick. 

      • Anonymous

        And what the hell is up with her hair?  I get that “roots” are a look  but that just looks like her hair person has been out of town since April. 

    • http://phantomminuet.blogspot.com/ MinAgain

      Oh, Rupert.

      Every girl under 30 on that carpet needs a primer on posing.  Yikes.

    • Vaniljekjeks

      I have the same dress as Avril, and I got that at H&M for the equivalent of $5. 
      Fergie is 20 years too old for that dress. 
      My cats would LOVE Kat Grahams dress.  They would go nuts. 

      • http://twitter.com/creneebo Renee Bomar

        Fergie looks like the cool mom who will buy beer for the rest of this crowd.

    • Anonymous

      Rebecca Black is experiencing some serious titscrepency.

      • Ellen Davies

        She’s only 13! She looks like she’s 30. 

      • Anonymous

        I didn’t know how to put it delicately …

      • http://twitter.com/asciident Melissa Della

        Someone should have gotten her into a pair of spanx or at least some control-top hose. The girl has a tummy and that’s fine with me, but it’s kinda distracting on the red carpet in that particular dress.

    • Anonymous

      Agree with everything except Holland Roden.  It is a great color for her but too short at both ends!  Love Blake Lively’s dress.

    • Anonymous

      Ashley Benson looks terrific as does Shay Mitchell.
      Mary Murphy made me laugh.

    • Anonymous

      “She looks like a pissed-off dust ruffle.” That made my day. And what was up with that leather jumper? Whoever thought that was a good idea clearly stayed up far too late. 

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_2FXYZIJCBOTXXYBFGMESVTCVWM bradybutkus

      Poor Tyra thought she was at the tryouts for the new catwoman movie…

    • Anonymous

      I am continuously amazed that men in the media spotlight think that “not caring” is still going to work.  HARUMPH  Rupert?  What the hell?   And on the other end of things, Joe Jonas?  Holy crap that is all kinds of awful.  But we sure know what he’s packing.

      • Anonymous

        Yes, I noticed that too.  Kind of hard not to.  Rumor has it that it is large and in charge…..

        • Anonymous

          Well, clearly its making all his clothing choices.  lol

      • Anonymous

        I think he looks like one of Saddam Hussein’s sons in that photo. I don’t care what he’s packing, it ain’t interesting.

        • Anonymous

          Now that you mention it I AM getting a kind of John Wayne Gacey kinda vibe off of him.

    • Anonymous

      I agree with you on everything, except Fergie, dear, the light top/dark bottom makes you look so top-heavy you appear in danger of toppling. Little girl in green dress: Very cute outfit to wear to the gynecologist. A little short for the rest of the world.

      Mary Murphy: HOLY SHIT WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU? You always look fabulous, in a cracked-out, this side of Paula Abdul way. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE?

    • Anonymous

      OMG Mary Murphy.  OMG.

    • Anonymous

      Holy Shoulder Fringe!  Thank you, Teen Choice, for continuing to bring a truckload of cracktastic to the masses.

    • Anonymous

      OMG, this must be because I have a pre-teen daughter, but I actually knew who TEN of these people are! 

      I am seriously stunned (both by that fact and that Rebecca Black rated the red carpet.  What is the world coming to?).

      • Anonymous

        The fact that Black Friday is on the red carpet makes me believe that the Mayans may be right after all.

    • Anonymous

      Tyra Banks is channeling her inner Raquel Welch. And not in a good way.

    • Kathleen Jackson

      Re: Tyra- Girl, after a certain age, just because you can, doesn’t mean you should. Way too young a look for her.

      • MilaXX

        Her and JLo seem to be trying for the try hard of the year.

    • http://profiles.google.com/thisiscelia Celia

      I think Shaye Mitchell and Ashley Benson (no idea who these nobodies are, but bravo) win this round. I gotta disagree with you on Fergie here…as usual, she looks like a horrid mess. Too blonde, dark roots, whack-ass unflattering outfit. Blake Lively is ORANGE and it gives me no small satisfaction to see Kim Kardashian like this. The worst offender is Mary Murphy. My GOD, did she lose a bet?

    • Anonymous

      Tyler Blackburn’s shirt reminds me of the Gordon Gartrell shirt episode of The Cosby Show.

      • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

        Wahaahahaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Anonymous

      Goddamnit! I have that stupid “Friday” song stuck in my head now! Again!

    • Anonymous

      Am I the only person who thinks Blake Lively should never, ever wear that shade of orange?  (Or really, any shade of orange.)  The dress is great, but I HATE the color on her.  

    • Anonymous

      Ian Somerhalder – “the service entrance in the back”.  Oh, yes it is!  (giggling and blushing now)
      Poor Mary Murphy………  that is just awful.

    • Shawn Hill

      Tyra has lost her marbles, hasn’t she? The next season of ANTM must be fierce!

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Antoinette-Niebieszczanski/100000014705925 Antoinette Niebieszczanski

        If she farts in that outfit, we’ll be able to see it go down her leg.

    • Anonymous

      nothing like laughing your ass off in the morning.  thanks boys!

    • http://twitter.com/EbookPublishHQ Kat

      Oh my stars, Mary Murphy. I adore her on SYTYCD, and this makes me sad. That leather thing looks like something a blacksmith should be wearing while shoeing a horse. Then it would be hot. (Well, presuming that the blacksmith was ripped, and wasn’t wearing much else…look, it’s Monday, I need a happy place, and poor Mary in this travesty of an outfit is NOT IT.)

    • http://profiles.google.com/sara.e.munoz Sara Munoz

      “… but we can’t deny the gal looks fierce and sharp here.”And plastic.

    • http://twitter.com/susanpcollier Susan Collier

      Hello! I’ll be showing my age here.
      Check out Blake Lively and Kim Kardashian! Teens love orange people!
      I can only assume that Chris Hemsworth’s facial hair is due to working on “Have Mercy!: The Wolfman Jack Story” for the Hallmark Channel.
      Yes Tyra! That’s how the kids dress nowadays, like bad girl Sandy Olsen.

    • Anonymous

      I’m sorry, but I think Blake Lively cheapens everything she wears. Looking at some of these young sprites, I’m kind of happy to be out of touch.

    • Anonymous

      I feel like the producers of the show need to send out a better memo stating what the dress code for the show is. I know it’s less formal than most award shows (it’s probably on par with any award show with MTV in the name), but you’ve got a pretty wide range of outfits here.

    • MilaXX

      Been waiting all morning to rip this RC.
      Ashley Benson – Cute, but the hair should be up. I agree a ponytail would be much better.
      Avril Lavigne  – It’s pretty basic, but she toned down the eye makeup so this is definitely a step in the right direction.
      Ayla Kell – Poor thing looks like she dressed form Betty White’s closet.Blake Lively – I’m not sure this is her color, but she looks great otherwise.Chris Hemsworth – No comment on the pants hem? They look horrible.
      Crystal Reed – This could work if the frou-frou wasn’t on the bottom of the dress. Hate the shoes.Darren Criss – He has worked to improve his RC looks, but this jacket is a bit Warbler-esqueDestinee Monroe and Paris Monroe – Did someone clone the Landers sisters?
      Fergie  – Hate the Star Spangled boobsHolland Roden – Cute, but a bit genericIan Somerhalder – Boots? really?Joe Jonas – He looks like a Solid Gold dancer with orthopedic shoes.Kat Graham – I don;t entirely hate this look, but that curtain on her should makes this look a bit Patty LaBelle & The Bluebells.Kim Kardashian – That skirt is silly looking.Mary Murphy – That is really unfortunate looking. How could she put on that dress with that shirt and think it looks any sort of good.Nina Dobrev – Cute
      Raven-Symone – This might have worked without the jacketRebecca Black – I think the dress looks a bit shapeless on her
      Rupert Grint – UGH! He needs to go sit in the corner with Ian SomerhadlerShay Mitchell – CuteTaylor Lautner – Please go show Ian how to deploy the boots appropriatelyTyler Blackburn – You go to the corner with Rupert & IanTyra Banks – Girl, this is not the outfit for you.

    • Anonymous

      The green dress is an out for me, too short on both ends.

    • http://visceralresponse.com Dina dV

      Ian Somerholder may look like he stumbled in from a bender, but he has blue eyes and eyebrows that would make a 30-year-old Peter Gallagher weep with envy so, yeah, looks like crap…but still so pretty!

      And is Tyra wearing a variation of Manila Luzon’s catsuit from the Sci Fi episode of RuPaul’s Drag Race?

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=668425491 Daniela ‘Dani’ Weiss-Bronstein

      Fergie’s hair is scaring me. That’s all for now.

    • Anonymous

      I love Rupert Grint, but you guys are so dead-on about his look. 

    • Anonymous

      Holland Roden’s boobs look like they’re trying to make a getaway.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1303837450 Lauren Dorsee Dillon

      Criss looks like the concierge on a cruise ship, not wearing white as to stand out from the service staff but still needing to look like an employee. Ashley Benson and Shay Mitchell take the best dressed prizes in my book, not that my book is well-read, much less published.

    • Anonymous

      I love that Darren had burberry raybans. He’s upgraded quite a bit lol.

      Mary Murphy made me question reality, David After Dentist-style. Is this real life?

      Also, Darren’s shout-out to Starkids when he got Breakout Star was sweet and showed how loyal he is to his Team Starkid friends and his pre-Glee fans.

    • Anonymous

      “Tlo said: He looks like a middle-aged high school teacher trying to look hip.”

      Actually, I was thinking he’s starting to look like Mr. Bean. Amirite? And I’m not sure if that’s better or worse than Fergie, who looks like a patriotic bumblebee.

      I have no idea who Shay Mitchell is, but her outfit looks pitch perfect.

      –GothamTomato

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_C65IT4K6RYN4TWRMFJOI3VUDAI Olechka Milashka

      OMG Mary Murphy!  OMG!  Everyone else’s shitty outfits just pale in comparison

    • Anonymous

      Smizing isn’t a super-power, dear.

      In a long list of great comments, that one is the SHIT!!

    • Anonymous

      I have always wondered about people who give their kids names like “Destinee”.
      Is it so when the kid grows up and becomes a stripper, she doesn’t have to change her name?

      • Anonymous

        It’s because names like Destinee are klassy and sound French.

    • Anonymous

      Does every socialite pair of sisters have to have one named Paris?

      Fergie’s face appears to be back to what it was . . . two faces ago.  Her dress is just silly.

      Ian, you’re so hot. Why would you do that to yourself?

      Rebecca Black is surprisingly stacked (albeit asymmetrically so) for an embryo!

      I like Tyler Blackburn’s outfit, I just hate his hair.

    • Alyssa Stanfield

      Kim Kardashian looks like the feather duster from Beauty & the Beast!

    • Jillian N

      All I can see in these pictures is the word “MOIST” over and over again.

    • Anonymous

       Kat Graham in Falguni & Shane Peacock

      What the hell is that? Some kind of rodeo or parade dress??? All that’s missing are flaming batons.

    • margaret meyers

      Holland Roden looks like Truck Stop Jail Bait, or the lure in a Honeytrap, smiling at you about how cute she is.

    • Anonymous

      This is one of the funnest posts EVER!!  You guys, as usual, completely rock my world … thanks for that fab laughs!

    • Anonymous

      Mary Murphy looks like a meat cutter or fish monger WTF?

    • Amanda in Austin

      I want that sparkly DKNY skirt so bad that it hurts.

    • http://profiles.google.com/dwight.lake Dwight Lake

      OMG how DARE you say that to Tyra? Now she’s gonna go and do a superhero themed ANTM… sigh… what have u DONE?

    • http://heartprintandstyle.blogspot.com Vivi N

      Rupert can do no wrong in my book. He’s just a cute little fella. My teenage crush.

      *ahem*

      Anywho, most of these outfits are wack and some literally made me laugh out loud. TLo’s captions may or may not have something to do with it. 

      Blake looks freakin’ amazing. 

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_OYMPLGS7S7467GQMKEWJDJ3N4A Deb

      I’m sorry Joe, Jonas, but you look like you’re trolling for little kids who have wandered away from parents.

    • Anonymous

      OMG!  Even before I read your comments about Destinee and Paris Monroe (WTF?  Who?  What?) I thought “V: The Early Years.” Having a reaction in the same ballpark as TLo makes me squee with delight! 

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_PKEMUFJDBZL5KUVSXY22FFS3EM Deborah

      I’m surprised Mary Murphy looks so tragically awful. Whoever dresses her for SYTYCD does an outstanding job making her look figure-conscious and age-appropriate, and she has a fairly distinctive style. I’m flabbergasted at how fugly this is on its own merits, but especially in contrast to how shy typically looks.

    • Rand Ortega

      re: Crystal Reed. When did the centaur look become de riguer? She looks like she has hooves.

    • Anonymous

      Believe it or not I think Tyra’s outfit may be related to that book she just wrote about “Super”models, in which “smizes” are golden wing-things (like the ones on her boobs), that gain a girl entry to the supermodel academy or something? I am so depressed that I know this.

    • Anonymous

      OK. I admit that I don’t know half the people there and I guess it’s quite normal, I’m too old…

    • http://profiles.google.com/awilsongirl Amy Wilson

      Honest to Oprah, I hissed outloud when the Jonas kid popped up as I scrolled. Holy hell- he’s like a low rent Don Johnson via Miami Vice. Ugh.

      Chris Hemsworth is fine. No 2 ways about it, I don’t care what anyone says- I don’t care how bulky he is or isn’t- he is damn fine. His shirtless scene in Thor was one of the highlights of this summer- and I did some cool shit this summer so that is saying something.

      Taylor Lautner- how old is he now? I am trying to decide if it is still skeevy for me to think he is hot. I suppose I could Google it but I’m not sure I want to know the answer.

      As for the girls, I have no opinion except to say that I love Blake Lively’s entire ensemble. The rest are a bunch of eh to me.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3CGY36NG25QFIZQOLMH7SQTKLU andrew

      Now I see why Leo is dating Blake Lively.  She looks like a female version of him in this picture.  It’s the eyes I think.  Or am I crazy?
       

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=49702581 Susan Bullard Mayer

      A) I must be getting old because those Monroe girls were born when I was in junior high – yeah, I know I’m not that old, but it feels it.
      B) Taylor Lautner makes me feel cougarish.
      C) I really wish Tyra would have worn knee-high boots to complete the costume.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=49702581 Susan Bullard Mayer

      A) I must be getting old because those Monroe girls were born when I was in junior high – yeah, I know I’m not that old, but it feels it.
      B) Taylor Lautner makes me feel cougarish.
      C) I really wish Tyra would have worn knee-high boots to complete the costume.

    • http://twitter.com/starvewars Sal

      HAHAHA @ the last 3 critiques. DYING. I love you bitches.

    • http://twitter.com/starvewars Sal

      HAHAHA @ the last 3 critiques. DYING. I love you bitches.

    • http://twitter.com/starvewars Sal

      also, joe jonas is my favourite ‘mo in this post.

    • http://twitter.com/starvewars Sal

      also, joe jonas is my favourite ‘mo in this post.

    • Anonymous

      The Desiree/Paris smackdown gave.me.life.

    • Anonymous

      The Desiree/Paris smackdown gave.me.life.

    • http://www.facebook.com/premal.laxman Premal Laxman

      Kim Kardashian should so play this. On ice.
       http://disney-clipart.com/Beauty-Beast/characters/fifi.gif

    • Anonymous

      Ian Somerhalder looks like he can fix one of the limos if it breaks down, at least.

    • Anonymous

      Why is TyTy at the Teen Choice Awards????

    • http://www.joannao.blogspot.com JoannaOC

      I loved the brown pleather jumper JUST LIKE Mary Murphy’s that I wored in 7th grade back in 1970. I wore it with Keds.

    • Anonymous

      I can’t even SEE Fergie’s outfit…I’m blinded by the monstrosity atop her head.  Burned/platinum/roots…I can’t take it.  Plus it always looks like she is competing against Renee Zellweger for the Ms. Shiny Face award.

    • Anonymous

      Can’t stop laughing at your Catholic schoolgirl critique…..

    • http://twitter.com/flaming_mo Maureen Cox

      Your assessment of the Monroe’s outfits are pretty spot-on. I took them for extras from “Earth Girls Are Easy” (1989). 

    • Patricia Biswanger

      Mary Murphy:  that is the most jaw-droppingly horrible outfit I have ever seen on this website or elsewhere.  Plus I had no idea who she was until I looked her up, and learned a lot more than I needed to know.

      Monroe Sisters:  Look like they’ll be living with Hugh Hefner just as soon as they turn 18.

      Rebecca Black: Like she hacked the bottom off a David’s Bridal bridesmaids’ dress. (And not to be mean to such a youngster, but she’s also using that scarf to hide a pretty ample gut.)

    • Anonymous

      Ohhhhh Miss Ty-Ty, I love you so much. I would show up in a slightly-ott superhero costume, too–hell, I’d be her sidekick. 

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=538336654 Joe ‘Brosef’ Smith

      Rebecca black’s dress makes her look really wide and really short.

    • http://twitter.com/Athenabast Athena Bast

      Is Darren Criss slightly pear-shaped because it seems like all his clothes make his shoulders smaller than his hips. And you are absolutely right about Joe Jonas.

    • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=22917995 Nicole Renee

      Sad thing is, Avril’s outfit is from her own clothing line…. sad indeed..

    • sonictofu

      hahahaha!  No, Tyra, no.

    • http://blue-again.myopenid.com/ blue

      Wow. That baby poop brown leather monstrosity is the worse outfit I have ever seen. I’d rather wear the infamous Bjork swan dress.

    • http://toodles.yelp.com AWStevens

      Tyler Blackburn: come back to the bowling league championship dear…

    • Anonymous

      Fergie and Tyra never disappoint me. I always know that whatever they wear is going to come from a huge animal print handbag of crazy.

      I do not even want to know what was going on in Mary Murphy’s head when she decided on the (p)leather version of a Catholic school uniform, puffy sleeves included. That is one of the most awful get-ups I’ve ever seen.

      Ashley Benson, Shay Mitchell, Nina Dobrev and (god help me) Blake Lively all look fabulous. Avril looks cute, and I love her shoes. Crystal Reed is also cute, but those shoes are horrendous. Holland Roden is gorgeous, and I do love her dress, but it needs some straps and another inch or two of – well – dress. Everyone else is either boring or ridiculous.

      I am horrified that I can now recognize Taylor Lautner.

    • Anonymous

      What a parade of skankitude, botched plastic surgery, and male stars who look like they are working (a) in the garage down the street (Taylor Lautner–and shine your damn shoes, you douche!), (b) in the second-level touring cast of “Jersey Boys” (Darren Criss), or (c) on the janitorial crew (Ian Somerhalder). Mary Murphy — OMIGOD!  She needs to sue her surgeon AND her stylist.  Before I realized who it was, I thought a photo of someone’s sort of trashy kindergarten teacher had somehow gotten into the pile.  Emphasis on pile.  A nightmare look to go with her nightmare voice!  Tyra Banks. WTF?????

      Thank you, Ashley Benson, for saving my eyes. 

      And yes, TLo, the Monroe Sisters–Destinee and Paris–are your retirement fund!  Just for laughs, let’s rename them Messtoday and Orlando.

    • http://twitter.com/ShelfAfterlife Shelf Afterlife

      I think Tyra’s in denial about being the oldest person in the room.

    • http://twitter.com/ShelfAfterlife Shelf Afterlife

      I think Tyra’s in denial about being the oldest person in the room.

    • http://twitter.com/kmc1138 Kathleen Coyle

      I really want to write an essay on how and why I hate Fergie, but I’ll restrain.  It’s petty, and I own that.

      Is Lively’s dress leather?  I would seriously sell a kidney to be able to pull off yellowed orange leather.  She looks super sleek.

    • Anonymous

      i just want to take those monroe sisters and plop them into their cutesy-wutesy double stroller, pinch their cheeks, and take them to the park.  but first they need their faces washed, and to put on some play shoes.  when i first saw mary whoever she is, i thought i had hit the wrong key and was looking at couches on ebay.  rupert grint- somehow the name fits him.  and is that underarm fat on tyra?  i do NOT need to SEE that.  please tell me that ayla whatever is not under 22 years old.  that’s just sad.  and she’s wearing the ugliest shoes of all.  kim kardashian is giving me toilet brush.

    • Anonymous

      Joe Jonas needs a make-over. He’s maturing out of cute non-threatening boy and into a somewhat skeevy looking man. A different approach is needed. Someone needs to take him aside and buy him his first big boy suit.

    • Anonymous

      TLo you are a sorry Perez Hilton wannabeeeeeee…..you actually don’t have a brain or you might have used it to do your homework first and see who you are dishing. These lovely young ladies are actually good girls that have AMAZING talent unlike you since all you can do is sit behind a computer and take cheap shots at people to make a living. why don’t you get a real job? I am a huge fan of these girls and they might be your retirement if your lucky. They are REAL singers with REAL talent and have some pretty awesome songs on youtube. They are opening for Britney Spears Femme Fatale Tour and actually have way more twitter followers than you attention whores.

    • http://twitter.com/eandh99 Hope Leith

      possibly the worst thing about Rupert Grint’s outfit? He wore essentially the same thing – with a self-made I (heart) Tom Felton tshirt, to the Rise of the Planet of the Apes red carpet last weekend.  I notice you’re ignoring Tom Felton’s window-pane check, untucked shirt and one-man campaign to bring back deck shoes without socks.

    • Toni Mitt

      Oh my Lord Tyra you hurt my eyes!  As did Mary Murphy and her leather dress on an August afternoon.  What a stupid idea. 

    • Anonymous

      Mary Murphy’s outfit made me scream out loud in fright.

    • Anonymous

      I didn’t know it was possible to assemble that much asstastic crack on one red carpet.

    • http://www.beautifymylifeblog.com Jessica

      I can’t believe you gave a thumbs up to that little green dress! It’s a gyno dress for one thing, and I’m pretty sure I saw it at Macy’s last weekend.

    • Hilary Sain

      it looks like Avril has never seen a camera before!

      And Jonas’ shoes just blew my mind….

    • http://twitter.com/A_SmallFry AC

      Hahahaha Kim looks just like the feather duster from Beauty and the Beast!

    • frankystein123

      Mary Murphy, you have not aged well. Nina Dobrev, WERQ the candy striper outfit girl! Shay Mitchell, keeping it fun and flirty.