Gwyneth Paltrow for Max Factor

Gwyneth Paltrow, professional lifestyle judger and former Most Beautiful Woman in the World, was cut a check by the good folks at Max Factor to convince her to show off her very best celebrity impersonations in celebration of the brand’s 100th anniversary.

PinGwyneth Paltrow as Audrey Hepburn representing the ’50s.

PinGwyneth Paltrow as Brigitte Bardot representing the ’60s.

PinGwyneth Paltrow as Farrah Fawcett representing the ’70s.

PinGwyneth Paltrow as Madonna representing the ’80s.

Wait. Madonna and Gwynnie … don’t they hate each other now? We picture Madge in a mascara-streaked rage, throwing ripped-up pieces of that last shot into a gigantic fireplace, while a half dozen or so muscular South American men of fluid sexuality stand around naked, waiting to be called upon.

These are all nice enough shots, until you read the captions. Honey, that’s not Farrah Fawcett. And any moment now, if there is a just God, zombie Audrey Hepburn will claw her way out of her tomb and eat Gwyneth’s brain for insulting her. We’re a little puzzled as to why they’d tap Paltrow for a campaign like this, since she doesn’t have the kind of face that bears a lot of makeup well. She looks best when she’s clean-faced. And when you do her all up, the makeup doesn’t have much effect. There’s really not that much difference between the Farrah face and the Audrey one – and that’s pretty ridiculous.

They should’ve given this one to Kristen Stewart. Hate us for saying it if you must, but she would’ve rocked the hell out of this campaign. She’s got the kind of face that looks radically different depending on how it’s made up.

[Photo Credit: Max Factor]

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• Gwyneth Paltrow
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