Metropolitan Gala Red Carpet, Part 3

Posted on May 03, 2011

Are you still, with us, brave minions? There’s still a TON of dresses to rip, so don’t falter now!  People are counting on you. Our country is counting on you. Or your country is, depending where you are. Anyway, the point it, there is no day off when you’re a bitch. Remember that.

Beyonce in Emilio Pucci

That’s all way too much. We fully support the idea of attendants at the Met Gala bringing it as best they can and working more out-there looks, but it’s just too much, kittens. She reminds us of an Elvis-on-velvet painting. One that’s having trouble breathing. Seriously, could that thing be any tighter? Her boobs and head look like they’re about to pop off.

Brooklyn Decker in Michael Kors

It’s kind of striking in its simplicity and the color suits her. We don’t love it, but it’s a good look for her.

Claire Danes and Hugh Dancy in Calvin Klein

It’s pretty, but boring. Together, they’re more than the sum of their parts. They’re each other’s best accessory.

Daphne Guinness in Alexander McQueen

God bless this woman. You know, if Barbara Hershey had worn this all through Black Swan, we would have liked that movie a lot more.

Demi Moore in Prabal Gurung and Philip Treacy Hat

What did we say about the hats? A bunch of celebs were dying to be at the Royal Wedding, so now we’re going to have to put up with them swanning about the red carpet like they’re at Ascot with the Queen. The dress looks good, though.

Elizabeth Banks in Tommy Hilfiger

On paper, this would be boring; especially since so many women seem to have defaulted to this dress for the night. But it really suits her. She looks fantastic. Great hair and makeup.

Emily Browning  in Marc Jacobs and Max Irons

It’s a bit too prim and understated for the event. And her purse doesn’t go with it. He could wear those pants as footie pajamas, the hem is so long on them.

Evan Rachel Wood in Gucci

Very pretty, if surprisingly understated. Then again, she’s been toning it down considerably lately. This is all perhaps a bit too close to costume-y since she decided to go for 1940s hair. We think a more modern hairstyle would have kicked this up a notch.

Fergie in Marchesa

The hell? Why is Fergie dressed like she’s there to get married? Was she confused? Is this some sort of post-Royal Wedding Fever breakdown? Did she spend the evening randomly telling men that she pledges her troth to them?

You know, we can almost believe she did.

Freida Pinto in Chanel

It’s cute, but we can’t help thinking it would look better as a simple halter. The sleeves detract from the simple wit of the dress.

Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen in Alexander McQueen

They’re gigantic, beautiful people so she requires a gigantic, beautiful dress.

Janelle Monae in Chanel

It’s kind of beyond our bitchery, being a costume and all. We’re a bit tired of the look, but she dressed it up well enough. The pants don’t fit that well, it seems.

Jennifer Hudson in Vera Wang

We like the top half and the color’s great on her, but we’re not all that crazy about the “look at my crinolines” skirt.

Jessica Alba in Ralph Lauren

Jesus Christ, could you lighten the hell up just once?

Your dress looks pageant-y.

Jessica Szohr in Topshop

Kittens, we are BESIDE OURSELVES over this whole Topshop thing. There’s a time and a place for Topshop (presumably), but the Met Gala is NOT it. Sorry. Any Topshop dress is going to look like crap standing next to dresses worth thousands, if not tens of thousands of dollars. In addition, a cocktail dress is inappropriate and those shoes are ugly. They really need to hire us as the style bouncers, because we would have met her at the door and told her to get back in her limo.

Kerry Washington in Escada

It’s an absolutely  gorgeous color on her, but we would have liked it a lot more without so much skin showing on the sides. A little too Miami for the Met Gala. That some mighty pink lipstick.

Leighton Meester in Louis Vuitton

Everything here looks like it hurts.

Liv Tyler in Givenchy

It’s definitely one of the most talked-about dresses of the night, so brava on that one, dear. We like it. It’s a little crazy, sure. But to us, that’s the point. It has a uniquely beautiful, dream-like quality to it.

Maggie Grace

She’s making that dress look prettier than it is. It all gets a little complicated and lingerie-like on her torso. One or two too many elements. Still, it keeps it from being boring.

Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr in Marchesa

Enh. Too short and a little too bridal in tone.

Rosario Dawson in Diane von Furstenberg

You have to admit, she was born to wear that dress.

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley in Burberry Prorsum

Looks cheap and flammable.

Sofia Vergara in Carolina Herrera

We weren’t at all crazy about this botanical-print-inspired collection when it came out, but we have to admit, this looks great on her. It’s nice to see her showing off her curves without going too va-va-voom, like she normally does.

Solange Knowles in Dries Van Noten


[Photo Credit: getty, wireimage]

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  • JL

    Liv Tyler looks fab. Am i first?

    • Anonymous

      she DOES look fab. And she usually doesn’t.

      • James Joyner4

        is she still dressed by Rachel Z?

  • mjude

    just making my way around the new site. love it boys. i am still having a few issues though. the posts have just been a laugh riot today so glad some things never change! 🙂

  • Anonymous

    Beyonce is wearing Pucci? I was sure it was House of Dereon. Elizabeth Banks and Evan Rachel Woods are gorgeous. Fergy, there are no words, except WTF is up with your face. I really dislike that Chanel that Pinto is wearing – it looks like she’s playing dress-up with her dad’s shirt and tie.

  • The color of Brooklyn’s dress literally hurts my eyes. I have to squint to look at it. Beyonce, oh Beyonce. There are no words for how uncomfortable you look. Miranda Kerr…the dress was bad enough, but the shoes made it flat out bad. Fergie’s face looks so weird in every picture I’ve seen her in. Not fresh, maybe a little too much silicone and botox, and without the sleeves that dress had a chance.

    • Anonymous

      I thought Brooklyn’s dress was photoshopped it was so bright.

  • amused kitten

    Your Solange comment slayed me!

  • Deusxmac

    i love that fergie’s lips can double as a flotation device, should the gala begin to sink.

  • I Like Solange! That dress is hilarious. Jennifer Hudson has yet to find a dress her newish boobs look good in. And some of the proper dresses actually look worse and cheaper than the TopShop ones (*Cough*Jessica*Cough*Alba*Cough*).

  • Kimmeister

    That pink dress on Brooklyn Decker literally doesn’t look real! The color is so uniform, it looks like I just drew it on in Microsoft Paint or something. Crazy.

    That dress makes it look like Daphne Guiness’s legs are only a foot long. Yikes.

    Freida, what the heck? You’re so beautiful, why do you look so bad here? And is this event the right place for a witty dress?

    Janelle Monae looks like a child.

    JHud needs to learn how to minimize the apparent size difference between her boobs.

    I don’t think the botanical print works well on a dress for a black tie event.

    What is going on with Solange’s eye makeup?

    • Anonymous

      Yes, that pink dress looks like the “View in other colors” tab at

  • Becca

    Whoa whoa whoa – are you kidding about Elizabeth Banks? I must respectfully but strenuously disagree. Her hair is okay (at least her roots aren’t too bad this time), but the makeup appears to age her about twenty years and the dress is 100% dullsville!

    • Rebecca

      Yes! Her hair normally looks terrible (even in movies!) and that lipstick is HID.E.OUS.

  • What is going on with Solange’s makeup?! That’s the part that sends it into CRAZY town!

  • Anonymous

    Evan Rachael Wood’s dress is fabu, but the hair detracts.

    J Hudson looks great, but she always has this one up one down thing going on with her boobs anymore. Honey have a minion whose sole job it is to check your boobs at random intervals and be sure they are both in the upright and forward position.

    Miranda Kerr rolled out in her honeymoon lingerie and showed up at the Met.

    Jessica Szohr is terrible. Her top looks like it is floating in midair, way too low on her bust. Her hair is a tragedy and those shoes are horrible.

    I just went to the topshop website. I’m highly unimpressed.

  • Mac

    Ok, so Fergie is the bride, is Janelle Monae the groom here? WTF!

  • Anonymous

    C’mon! The REAL story is the dude behind Elizabeth Banks! Forget getting him at the limo, the SoulBrother Style Bouncers would have clocked and ousted him somewhere around 60th and West End Avenue.

    • Anonymous

      I second that!

    • Braxton Hicks

      Considering that’s Rolf (of Viktor and Rolf fame) – Ms Wintour would not have been amused by them ‘removing’ him from the party.

      At least it’s not as bad as Karl Lagerfeld’s jacket (he’s lurking behind Demi Moore) – apparently ‘Hideous Mismatched Brocade” is all the rage amongst European fashion designers this season.

      • Braxton Hicks

        Oh, and while we’re talking about the people behind the people. The woman behind Leighton Meester? In the black leggings and platform Birkenstocks?

        I don’t care who she is, or what she was doing there. That outfit is unacceptable at any time – but at the Met Ball? I’m surprised she wasn’t beheaded and hung on the gates of the Metropolitan Museum as a warning to all who dare to follow in her clunky orthopedic footsteps.

      • scottyf

        Oh, god that IS him. Yeah, I guess you’re right: Anna would not be amused.

        Well, Mr. Snoeren may be de rigueur, but Rolf’s pants still make me want to rolf.

  • Liv Tyler looks like she peed and her dress is slowly absorbing it. I liked Solange better when she had no hair.

  • Anonymous

    Best part of Beyonce’s dress are the pictures of her requiring two people to help her walk in it. She looks like she can’t breathe, much less move.

    • Anonymous

      I know, one of the lads had to help her move her legs for God’s sake! Those were my fave pictures of the night by far.

  • I would dig Liv Tyler’s dress in any other color but as it is it looks like she’s stepped in a gigantor puddle of pee that’s getting wicked up through her skirt.

  • Anonymous

    Leighton Meester: Project Runway hardware store challenge.

    And someone forgot to tell Elizabeth Banks and Maggie Grace that this was a fun event. Clearly Daphne Guiness got the message.

    • Charlotte

      Remember that she’s been kidnapped by Kim Jong Il recently. She is probably on North Korean a propaganda mission…wait until Sarah Palin shows up!

  • Verena

    Rosie Huntington makes everything look cheap. Sexy she may be. I’d even give her pretty if I had to. But Goodness, she looks like she was just freshly plucked from a council estate! They’ve taken out her Croydon facelift but the ginormous hoop earings still make regular appearances.

  • Anonymous

    also: “…there is no day off when you’re a bitch.”

    where do I order the t-shirt, coffee mug and thong?

  • Yay, the return of Pretty Liv Tyler! Daphne Guinness gets it. So does Beyonce. Yeah, it’s too much, but it’s Beyonce. Love the color on Kerry Washington, hate the big hair. Jessica Szohr and Fergie are both on crack. I’d wear Evan Rachel Wood’s dress in a heartbeat. I still don’t know who Brooklyn Decker is, but she did a good job. Frieda Pinto deserves credit for trying to get it. And I’m cringing for Demi Moore.

  • Sexy Sadie

    Ewan Rachel Wood on top and Miranda Kerr on botten.

  • tom

    Love Liv Tyler! And Sofia Vergara! And now I am tired. Perhaps it was the physical exertation from running screaming out of the room from Beyonce and the gold vise grip of death.

  • Sofia Vergara, I’m so proud of you! Sexy, but classy.

  • Anonymous

    Janelle looks squaty and short.

  • Anonymous

    If I wasn’t already married, Liv Tyler’s dress would be my new ultimate dream wedding dress.

    • reader

      Love that idea of making it a wedding dress! I love that whole Givenchy collection.

  • Oli

    Does anyone agree that the sleeves-without-shoulders thing is the tackiest thing, plus flattering to absolutely no one?

  • MilaXX

    Beyonce – Hiddy. She looks ready to pop and she could barely move in that dress. She had to be helped up the steps. Ridic.

    Brooklyn Decker – The best MK look of the evening. The color sells it.

    Claire Danes and Hugh Dancy – It feels like I’ve seem this look on her before. He’s fine, but they are collectively a pair of boring sticks in the mud

    Daphne Guinness – I love this outfit in all it’s over the top glory.

    Demi Moore – She would have looked fine if she had done without the hat. Leave it to the Brits.

    Elizabeth Banks – The dress is nice enough, but I thought the orange lip clashed with her fake tan a bit.

    Emily Browning in Marc Jacobs and Max Irons – I like his shoes, but they look like a pair of extras from the prom scene in pretty in Pink.

    Evan Rachel Wood – pretty color but a little generic looking.

    Fergie – Hot mess. Just overworked and busy.

    Freida Pinto – I agree with what TLo is saying about the sleeves, but I still think she looks good in this.

    Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen – he’s just her accessory at this point because all anyone could talk about was her in this dress. She looks really good.

    Janelle Monae – It’s in line with her typical look. I was kinda interested when her saw the hat, but I wish she has somehow switched up the outfit. either a different take on the pants on a dress of some sort.

    Jennifer Hudson – The hair is horrible and she still seems to be having trouble fitting the bust line properly on her new body. The dress is okay.

    Jessica Alba – Eh’ I don’t think her dress is any worse than Kate Hudson. Since no celeb seems to want to walk the RC in Pea in a Pod this ends up being the default look most of them wear.

    Jessica Szohr – My guess is somebody on Topshop’s PR department is trying to raise the rep of their brand. While I can give Ginnefer Godwin’s dress a pass, I can;t cosign on this one. It’s cheap and ugly looking.

    Kerry Washington – Dress is okay. I like the makeup.

    Leighton Meester – UGH! tacky city, she was doing okay for a minute and now she’s back to dressing like this.

    Liv Tyler – This is my favorite dress of the evening. She looked great in this.

    Maggie Grace – She looks pretty but I would have loved to seen her in some color.

    Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr – He looks fine, her dress is fug

    Rosario Dawson – Spot on

    Rosie Huntington-Whiteley – Apparently this was custom made for her. Shame it’s so ugly.

    Sofia Vergara – I liked this. It’s appropriate for the event but not Jessica Rabbit sexy like she usually does.

    Solange Knowles – I realize growing up in Bey’s shadow cannot have been easy & I appreciate that she likes to be a bit different, but this is butt ugly head to toe.

  • Anonymous

    Didn’t Beyonce wear almost that exact dress recently? Someone with a functioning memory help me!

    • dee

      She always wears that dress…At least, the silhouette. But yeah, she has worn that color combo recently(can’t remember either)

    • Anonymous

      She probably wore it the night before and couldn’t get out of it.

      • aimee_parrott

        Ha! I think you’re right.

  • Miss Heather


    Max Irons looks like a wax figure.

  • Anonymous

    What the hell happened to Solange???
    Also, I want a ‘bitch’ tee shirt. Size medium. Black with white lettering. Overnight it, will you darlings?

  • Anonymous

    That chick may be named Brooklyn, but that eye-searing pink betrays her true origins.

    • Anonymous

      Ok, I’ll bite. Where? Staten Island? I’m from NC so I’m allowed to be stupid. 🙂

      • Anonymous

        I looked her up (didn’t know who she is); turns out she’s from Ohio. But Staten Island’s not a bad guess!

        • Kitty O

          So people from Ohio like neon colors? What? I don’t understand your comment.

  • Anonymous

    “There is no day off when you’re a bitch” should totally be your new tag line!

  • Megan

    Brooklyn Decker looks great and I LOVE the color. Evan Rachel Wood is one of my favorite looks of the night. Sure it’s a little boring, but very pretty and nice color. Liv Tyler looks fabulous.

  • Anonymous

    Hmmm. Everything that Madame Kors design is sooooo…dull. And he is a judge on project runway?

    Too bad none of the men did anything fun at this event. Or is that yet to come?

    Go to the Rosie Huntington-Whiteley photo.. The gentlemen to her right is totally dateable. Is he anyone we should know?

  • Vera

    Solange’s outfit gave me the best laugh of the day. Thanks guys.

  • Loathe Brooklyn Decker’s retina searing pink dress, it’s so bright and jarring that it looks like something that was photoshopped in afterwards. Not sure about Elizabeth Banks’ makeup, she looks a little manish but that might just be her expression. And as for Leighton Meester, well sure if you’re a Cenobite and Pinhead’s your date for the evening.

  • Janelle looked fabulous NO ARGUING

  • Guestie

    Am I the only one who looks at that photo of Frieda Pinto and sees Michael Jackson?

    • Anonymous

      I had the same thought. I’m afraid I don’t see wit, just ugly 80s Deb shop nastiness.

  • RedRaven

    Fergie is starting to look way too Sophia Loren for someone her age.

  • Lori B

    In that photo of Brooklyn Decker she looks like a figure from a Colorforms set.
    Freda Pinto looks tragic, Sofia Vergara looks gorgeous and Miranda Kerr looks like she came right off a Victoria’s Secret runway.
    TLo, I hope there’s another post to come, I’d love to know your take on Sarah Burton’s gown.

  • Anonymous

    What has happened to Fergie?

    Sofia Vergara looks beautiful.

    Marchesa needs some new ideas.

  • Cat

    Maggie Grace’s dress is also from Topshop.

  • I’m really enjoying the *background* in these photos. So much more interesting than, say, the red carpet at the Academy Awards.

    Also, Tom–for the love of Mike!–please get a haircut.

  • Hilary

    I love Liv Tyler, everything about it, especially the clutch. Also Rosario looks fabulous.

    Miranda Kerr? What the hell, girl?!

    I love J Szohr but I am disappointed… so disappointed.

    I am so sick of Gisele.

  • Anonymous

    The dresses on Beyonce and Solange made me laugh out loud. Perhaps they planned it.

  • Sara L.

    Okay, I love Frieda Pinto’s dress. Witty indeed. But we all need to bow down to Giselle Bundchen. Good lord, she looks amazing.

    And the Solange commentary made me LOL for real, thanks for that!

  • Anonymous

    Daphne Guinness looks like the kind of cat toy kitties dream about.

  • Demi Moore’s dress looks like she ripped up some sheets and a few crows . Eughck.
    Put some sleeves on Sofia Vergara’s dress and she’d fit riiiight in at Oktoberfest.
    The rest I agree with, though.

  • kingderella

    of all the ‘out there’ looks, i think beyoncés is one of the best. it is too tight, though.

    i love brownings prim-chic look, but the purse clashes so badly it hurts.

    ah, fergie. i was all ‘its surprising, but she looks really good’ the last few times she was featured on this blog. now *this* is the fergie we know: completely cracktastic, literally. the dress would have been nice, actually, maybe on somebody like christina ricci? and without the tiara, abviously.

    bundchen: DRAMA! FIERCE!

    j’adore monae

    huntington-whiteley: i think she looks beautiful, even though i dont like the dress very much. the colour is gorgeous on her, and hair and make-up are very pretty.

    solange: LOL, your comment makes the look. actually, i kinda love this… i might be wrong, but it feels to me that unlike many other cracky-looking gals, solange actually has a sense of humour about it all.

  • Anonymous

    Emily Browning & Max Irons look like they’re going to prom at a moderately religious, expensive private school. And that hair thing he’s got, the one that looks like it’s meant for a kewpie doll, needs to go.

    Beyonce & Fergie thought they were competing for dreadful, but Ms. Huntington-Whitely and Ms. Szhor took dreadful to a whole new level of dread.

    Brooklyn Decker’s pink makes me think of all those travel brochures where there’s almost always a swimsuit of exactly that color posed against the impossibly blue blue of the resort pool/Caribbean sea/generic tropical lagoon.

  • Judy_J

    Did Beyonce stand all during the Met performance? ‘Cause she sure as hell couldn’t sit down in that dress!

  • Jen

    I want to see more of the guy to the left of Daphne!

  • Anonny

    Jessica Szohr = Rebecca Black

  • Leighton Meester’s dress is ugly, but kinda badass. That tightly pulled-back hair is unflattering though. How can this girl look so freaking gorgeous every week on Gossip Girl yet so terrible on every red carpet?

  • What in the HELL are those pants behind Elizabeth Banks?

  • Anonymous

    Tory Burch, TopShop, Marchesa….these are not names that belong at the Met Gala.

    Ms. Banks gets ‘most improved’ from the Correspondents Dinner.

  • Quakerflygirl

    Hi guys. I’ve been getting this error when I check in with you today… “Stop running this script? A script on this page is causing Internet Explorer to run slowly. If it continues to run, your computer might become unresponsive.”

    • meow kitten

      I keep getting the same message, and the site loads soooooo slowly. FYI….

    • MilaXX

      working nice and speedy in Firefox, no script errors

  • Kathleen

    Lighten up on Jessica Alba, she’s pregnant. Its so hard to find a nice dress that fits well and isn’t tacky when you are pregnant. Its one of the better maternity dresses I’ve seen on the red carpet.

  • Paintedfish30

    I coulda swore those were Beyonce’s nipples and not lace.

  • Gigi Louis

    OMG, for a split-second I thought Fergie was wearing my 1984 wedding gown!

  • Jen

    Beyonce looks like the leaning tower of tacky. One light gust of wind and she’ll tip right over. She amazes me with her talent in making the average couture frock look hootchie. I seriously would like to meet Fergie’s stylist, cos he/she must talk a helluva hustle. I hope JHud will one day find her true style-the generic super weave and bandage-style dresses have run their course. I like Liv’s dress. Why would Demi & Serena both assume feathery gowns deserve crack-o-licious hats? Jessica Szohr and Leighton Meister look equally stupid. Janelle Monae, I’m over your look, too – you change up your songs, do the same with your clothes once in awhile. Yikes-Frieda Pinto’s looking a little Michael Jacksonish in the face. Kerry Washington is cute, but she’s too skinny for that much hair. Solonge – nude lipstick is not your friend also if you really want to surprise people & make a statement, wear a dress like Brooklyn Decker’s. If you loose the weave, limit accessories & batshit makeup, you’d look fab.

  • Basement baby! why?

  • so, these dresses that look like they’re covered in sequins (ie Rosario’s). Are they actually SEQUINS, or some more expensive/ fancier something that gets that effect? Because I have -worn- full sequin dresses before, and they shed and itch like craaaaaaaazy

  • Anonymous

    Where can I catch a photo of the back of Liv’s dress? I read that makes it because I sure don’t think much of the front.

    These chicks in Topshop maybe don’t rate a designer lending them a dress for the night.

    • MilaXX

      I think I saw a shot of the back on fabsugar or Instyle

      • Anonymous

        Thanks MilaXX. I don’t know. It looks like Liv sat on Tweety Bird and he stuck to her ass. I don’t like it.

  • LRo

    Janelle Monae looks like a lawn jockey

  • Nancy

    The color Brooklyn Decker is wearing would suit no one. It is hideous. Sofie Vergara looks beautiful here. If I had a zillion dollars and a stylist and an army of hair and makeup people I hope I could do better than 90% of these people. Fergie? Solange? Miranda? Leighton? The list goes on and on.

  • MilaXX

    I keep wondering what Janelle Monae could have done that was within her current styling choice. I think she could have worn Frieda Pintos’ dress sans sleeves and looked great. I wouldn’t even have minded the silly hat.

  • again with the ghastly makeup. I hope it was the lighting, or something – unless this was one of those gimmicks of “STARS WITHOUT THEIR MAKEUP”?? Such boring gowns – long straight solid shiny. I think the US Starlet Machine needs to start getting its fashion from the Far East – India, China, – was it Malaysia’s Fashion Week this winter that was so amazing? There were tons of more colorful and more interesting looks on the eastern runways than these chickies assembled here. And Emily Browning gets a pass because who’s looking at HER when she’s with HIM? He COULD be wearing footie pajamas, and it’d be fine with me.

  • ChiKat

    I thought I was the only one tired of Janelle Momae’s look. Maybe she & Beyonce can switch

  • 3foxes

    When I saw Fergie’s photo, I gasped. A gasp of horror. Why is she wearing that dress? And why does her face look like that?

    Jessica Szohr, please have a chat with Daphne Guiness or Liv Tyler. They will be able to explain (should TLo’s explanation not be enough) why no one wants to see Topshop on the red carpet.

  • Fergie needs to quit having work done. She’s starting to look like Mickey Rourke.

  • aussiegal77

    The royal wedding has rendered Hollywood insane. Attention celebs – you can not pull off hats, stop trying. And stop wearing bridal on the red carpet. Especially if you’re already married!

    I am a totally cranky mood today…..3 Met Gala posts and I can not find one outfit that I loved. Not even Iman. Wow, I AM cranky.

    2 questions – why are photos of Claire Danes and hubs always at an angle? And what is going on with Tom Brady’s hair?!!!

    No rest for bitches. Got it.

    • aussiegal77

      Plus……why is the red carpet so freaking crowded? There’s a mob in every shot. I hate Orlando Bloom’s hair.

  • Anonymous

    I’m a bitch for sure, but apparently not one with stamina. Some dresses are lovely, some are not. Stella McCartney certainly seemed to abound this year.

  • MarziRocks

    Daphne Guinness: I’ve seen that dress twice in editorials, once on GaGa and once on Mia Waz-whatever her name is. It just doesn’t feel like a dress that should be worn to anything. You wear it for a picture, then you give it back to Alexander McQueen’s minions and say thank you. Make sure you bow down like the mere mortal you are as you back out of the room.

    Liv Tyler looks AMAZING. She’s probably the celebrity I look the most like and I WISH she looked this good more often, would make it easier to take style cues from her.

    Tom Brady and Gisele really are gigantic.They’re both a good head and a half taller than everyone else around them. Other than taking up enough space for 6 other people, that dress is kind of boring. The girl in white next to her is look at the train as if to say, “Really bitch? You need a damn parking space for that thing.”

  • There was only like 2 dresses in all three groups that I liked and one of them was Liv’s….can a gay help me figure out what CRACK the designers and stylists have been smoking lately…..

  • The Magpie

    First off, T&Lo StyleBouncers are my new favorite superheroes. I must say, I picture you in tuxes with those giant padded q-tips from American Gladiators. And I see the people you bounce running to their limos from the giant q-tips. Also, I suggest the awards ceremonies seriously consider style bouncers. Topshop would not again appear at the Met Ball.

    Second, I wonder if the wedding dress celebrities were all “OMG ROYAL WEDDING” and in a moment of hysteria their stylists were like “I KNOW RIGHT?” and allowed them to wear wedding-esque dresses to the Met gala.

    Finally, LOVE the new site.

  • Patience

    Who is the guy in the tartan, with Daphne Guiness?

  • Leslie S

    I was dying laughing because when I first saw that photo of fergie I said “the hell?” out loud and then I scrolled down a little bit and saw you had written the same thing! she looks like a creep!

  • Innacan

    Fergie and Solange just look ridiculous. But Beyonce – I love you girl! Fantastic as always, just fabulous.. You have to have curves to show that dress and she is wonderful in it. Would love to have it myself 🙂

  • J. Hud’s dressing for the Oscars (I don’t agree w/Entertainment Weekly bloggers all the time, except this time!), but Liv Tyler is SO. ON. POINT. P.S. It’s also really nice to see that Tom Brady’s hair plugs are taking (J-E-T-S, Jets, Jets, JETS!!!),

  • alyce1213

    “Leighton Meester in Louis Vuitton Everything here looks like it hurts.”

    Mostly my eyes.

  • PatBiswanger

    I don’t know who Daphne Guinness is, but what’s the deal with the guy on her right, in the plaid? Whoever he is, I think his outfit merits discussion.

  • Janelle Monae looks like those racist butler guys they used to put on lawns…

  • montina7

    What’s up with Rosie Huntington-Whiteley’s huge white purse? It looks like something Sophia Petrillo would use to smuggle cheesecake.

  • disagree about Liv Tyler, maybe that dress looks semi-good in the picture you put up but in all others I saw it looks ugly as f-ck. as for Jessica Alba – seriously? you take ONE picture where she makes stupid face and say she won’t smile??? all pictures I saw of her at MET were her SMILING.

  • SMM

    Best: Liv Tyler (shocking!).
    Worst: Fergie (with Jessica Szohr as close second).

  • Michelle

    LOL on The Solange! Great post once again, T Lo!

    Like your new site, by the way; it’s easier to navigate and to look at your early posts.

  • Say What

    I think between Daphne and Demi you have “The White Swan” and “The Black Swan” covered. And Jessica Szohr is the “Black Swanling” – total meh.
    I want to know who the person is that was standing to the left of Daphne was. He certainly went “mad for plaid” didn’t he? And that was Uncle Karl behind Demi, correct?
    Who is Janelle Monae? I thought it was Willow Smith up past her bedtime.

  • DTW

    Have you ditched posting runway version photos alongside RC ones for good?

    A great feature from the old site that I miss on the new site.

  • rebecca

    Liv looks lovely. Gisele and Tom look like siblings.

  • Anonymous

    Love La Guinness.
    Also love the Emily Browning, Sofia Vergara, and Rosario Dawson looks.
    Fergie and Beyonce look like gag gift salt and pepper shakers .

  • Anonymous

    And Jesica Szohr looks like Betsey Johnson.

  • TLo, do you know who designed Miranda Kerr’s shoes? I NEED those!

  • fafafab

    so glad to see Liv Tyler, I thought she had vanished from the face of earth, and she’s looking good, Evan Rachel Wood is looking gorgeous as always, I’m no fan of the dress but she’s so pretty

  • Anonymous

    I think Beyonce stole her dress from Babette the Featherduster in Broadway’s Beauty & the Beast.

  • Terrie

    Leighton Meester looks like she made her dress out of window blinds.

  • Anonymous

    I love that Tom Brady is grabbing Giselle’s ass. Way to go, Mr. Appropriate.

  • Mclair

    Maggie’s dress is also Topshop

  • Anonymous

    I just love the last dress. It’s very peculiar but strangely attractive and fierce.

  • Anonymous


  • Anonymous

    I wish Giselle would lend Tom some shampoo, that hair is just nasty. Sofia & Rosario look amazing!!

  • Ginger

    Marchesa really is one of the most overrated designers out there right now. Their stuff makes me wanna vomit.

  • RP

    I want to know who the guy in the plaid next to Daphne Guinness is. He’s either wearing something awesome or crazy and I need to see it.

  • Bridget KD

    Okay, this is not fashion related, but what the HECK is going on with Fergie’s face?

    I love Liv Tyler’s dress. It was whimsical and creative without being absurd.