THE GILDED AGE: A Different World

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A proposal! A shamed divorcee! A growing scandal threatening the Astors! A lonely widow being foolish! An incredibly bitchy sister-in-law! And a formerly rock-solid couple in serious trouble. This week on The Gilded Age, it was all about legally bound pair bonds as everyone winds up questioning or fully buying into the institution of marriage. But first, a sleepy Gladys arrives at… Shmownton Shmabbey. Fellowes isn’t even trying to be subtle here. Even the music switched over to a Downton Abbey-like theme when Sidmouth Castle came into view. To her shock, the local peasants have come out to throw flowers at her. To our total not-shock, Lady Sarah turns out to be a controlling bitch with no sense of boundaries.

Hot Beard is on a rampage and fires his Sith lord assistant for not making money rain down on him. Upstairs, Bertha is also on a rampage, because the papers are still publishing gossip about her family, which kills our theory that Adelheid was the culprit, since she’s currently off in England being whipped by Lady Sarah. Bannister tells Church that his experience has taught him that the most recent hire is the most likely culprit, which tends to suggest that the French ladies maid is the one to look at. Fellowes does love himself a duplicitous ladies maid. On the other hand, George is weirdly sanguine about the gossip in the paper, telling Bertha that it’s just a fact of the way they live. He suggests that they have too many secrets. Or maybe it’s as everyone from Agnes to Lina Astor says and Bertha’s the one doing the leaking. Still, despite his annoyance with her, they have an easy rapport in this scene, as he asks her to set up a dinner with Mr. Merrick from the Met so that he can convince him to sell off some of his family’s railroad stock.

Meanwhile, at various downstairs locations, Mr. Borden and Mrs. Bruce continue to bond over having secret spouses – and also being in love but unable to act upon it. It’s all very Victorian and kind of sweet. Granted, it feels completely disconnected from the rest of the series. Also, Mrs. Bauer, who clearly can’t keep a secret, tells Bannister and Armstrong how much Jack made on the clock. We’re getting a little uncomfortable with everyone knowing about this. Has Jack even received the money? Still, it might have been worth it just to gaze upon Armstrong’s utterly appalled face. Upstairs, the news of Jack’s money reaches Agnes’s ears and she demands to know the exact amount.

Larry, who has terrible instincts, takes an inexplicably delighted Marian into some bushes to propose to her. She accepts, of course. She always does. They reveal the news to her aunts, one of whom is thrilled, the other of whom is doing a very bad job of pretending to be. Later they toast the news with Larry’s parents, one of whom is thrilled, the other of whom isn’t even trying to pretend to be.

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Mr. Merrick, who comes off like a sassy gay but is evidently hot for Bertha, comes for dinner, where one of the Russells damn near charms the pants off him and the other one very much doesn’t. Hot Beard needles him to sell off some of his railroad stock and it’s kind of refreshing to see an old money person react to the Russell bullying with nothing more than mild amusement. Pissed about, well, everything, George confronts Bertha, who starts off the argument throwing her weight around, but it would seem that the power dynamic has shifted in this household. Bertha is furious over the news of Larry’s engagement but Hot Beard has decided to bolt the barn door after the horse has been sold off (so to speak), which means he’s trying to exert some control over his family long after it would have been helpful to his daughter. He points out to her that, unlike her daughter, Larry doesn’t require her permission to marry, which kind of shuts her down completely. She exerted just a little too much control over family matters for George’s liking during the Gladys affair and he’s become increasingly resentful of her. Of course none of this helps Gladys in any way, nor does it absolve George from practically dragging her down the aisle against her will.

We kind of assumed that Larry was going to end his association with Jack once the deal was done (Is the deal done?) so it was kind of nice to see him take the clearly overwhelmed footman out for a night of slutting around, Gilded Age style. The Haymarket was a dance hall with a rough reputation and men of Larry’s class were given pretty much free rein to be as nasty as they’d want to be. “You have money now, you can afford a more interesting life,” Larry tells him. We wonder if Jack will be able to keep his mouth shut to his fellow servants. Will this visit spell trouble for Marian and Larry? We weren’t sure about it until one of Larry’s friends notes that “No woman is reasonable about a club like this — no wife, anyway.” Larry spies the former Maud Beaton taking a gentleman caller upstairs and she pretends not to know him.

At Shmownton Shmabbey, Lady Sarah has fired Adelheid for the crime of having tacky tastes in hair accessories. “Surely even you can see that I know a little more about how things are managed in England,” she sneers at Gladys, who is trying to make the attempt to appear angry (and failing at it). The Duke mildly rebukes his sister for firing Adelheid and reminds her that it was her idea for him to marry “a Yankee heiress.” “I suppose it never occurred to me that you’d have to bring her home,” she replies, which is a funny line, but doesn’t really make sense because she’d know as well as anyone that the single most important job of a duchess is to make a new duke. We said before that the writing on Hector has been vague and contradictory but we seem to be coming down on “well meaning,” for the most part. In other words, he’s not going to abuse Gladys physically or mentally. Maybe that’s crass of us to write, but it was literally the number one consideration of any bride in an arranged marriage, so there’s got to be some sense of relief on Gladys’s part.

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Back in New York, Peggy attends a baseball game with Dr. Kirkland. She runs into T. Thomas Fortune and she’s deeply uncomfortable, probably because William sizes him up almost immediately. Fortune asks her if she’d be interested in interviewing Frances Ellen Watkins Harper and she tries to demur, but he pushes her on it and promises to send her the details. She confesses to William that things were “complicated” with Mr. Fortune because absolutely no one in any Julian Fellowes drama can keep their mouth shut. Agnes is delighted at the news of the assignment, but Marian shows a level of concern that borders on busybody. Granted, it seems she was right to be a little pushy about this, because Fortune later surprises Peggy at the train station as she’s leaving for her interview. He announces that he’ll be accompanying her on the trip, which is both highly improper of him and also kind of a shitty thing to have a real-life trailblazer and historic figure do in your fictional drama. Peggy stands her ground and says she’ll either go alone or not at all. Dr. Kirkland backs her up and asks Fortune to leave. He responds by shoving him and we hate all of this. Peggy tells Kirkland that “there’s more to tell” about her relationship with Fortune, but is there? You really don’t have to tell the guy with the mother who’s trying to destroy you that you kissed a married man.

Before leaving for Arizona, Larry tells Oscar about Maud’s status and whereabouts and promises him that he won’t tell anyone else. Oscar tells John Adams, who asks him if he’s going to go see her there and points out that revenge isn’t necessary, given how grim her life must be. Oscar, being Oscar, suggests that he might go and see her, if only for answers. The ever-sensible John Adams notes that Oscar was no more truthful with Maud than she was with him, although we’re not sure any gay man in that time and class would have seen it that way. Obviously, Oscar’s not going to drop this.

Agnes goes to see Madam Dashkova at her residence, where she conducts a seance and reveals such intimate, unforeseen truths as “He loved you” and “He wants you to be happy.” Ada gives her his watch to get a reading and we’re not sure Madam Dashkova ever gave it back, but either way, Ada seems ready to get out of her mourning period. She tells Agnes she’s ready to move into violet mourning clothes.

Bertha is shocked to find out that George fired his old business manager and questions him about the state of his business. “Tell me about your business.” “No.” “You know you want to.” “I need money to do the thing,” “Will you find enough money to do the thing?” “I don’t know.” This is how every business conversation goes on this show. Then he yells at her some more about Gladys. Where was all this anger before you sold her off? “George, what is happening?” she asks him, showing real concern. He tells her that he has no time to “soothe your guilt or calm your fears.” Hot Beard is unraveling.

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Marian goes to see the weepy Aurora Fane in Newport to show off her engagement ring and it occurs to us that she’s essentially the Carrie Bradshaw of this ensemble; obsessed with romance and clueless about how she comes across to others. Aurora pretends to be happy to see someone getting married and tries not to dissolve into a puddle of tears. The divorce is going through and she reveals that she’ll get to keep “the houses,” which works out pretty well for her, even if she can’t have a social life. Marian reveals all the gossip about Lina Astor’s daughter and Aurora rightly notes that it won’t make the doyenne any more kindly toward her. We didn’t quite realize it until this episode, but the focus this season seems to be entirely on the state of marriage in this class at this time — and the view is a pretty dim one all around. They head off to Mrs. Fish’s party, where everyone treats Aurora like she has leprosy – everyone except Bertha. We’re not sure we buy this characterization, but we suppose Bertha might have some sympathy toward someone Mrs. Astor deems an outcast. Bertha quite astutely notes that Lina is likely to use Aurora (Can we pause and say how much we love some of the names on this show?) as a distraction from her daughter’s scandal. Mrs. Fish suggests that Aurora should leave and Bertha threatens to cause a scene. Aurora is properly mortified and quickly leaves with Marian. Laters, Mrs. Fish calls Lina the c-word. In so many words. She tells her that she can’t shut out Aurora if she’s not willing to cast out her own daughter, although we’re not really sure that tracks or that Mrs. Fish is in any position to be delivering ultimatums to Lina Astor.

Bertha comes home to an absolutely furious Hot Beard, who shows him Gladys’s letter. She pleads with him to give her time to fix this, but he shrugs her off and says that she made him look weak, which is just about as big an uh-oh as you’re ever gonna hear out of George Russell’s mouth. She says she’ll be in England before Larry reaches Arizona, which doesn’t seem remotely likely, George responds that she can do whatever she wants, but he won’t be there when she gets back, and we burst out laughing and clapped our hands in delight. It’s all so ludicrous and unlikely, but what’s more important is that it’s DRAMATIC. This is Sir Julian Fellowes! None of this shit has to make any sense!

So! Are we looking at an endgame of Mrs. Bertha Merrick and Mrs. Aurora Russell? We’re just saying! L! F! G! Until that happens, we’re seated for a positively feral Bertha Russell re-enacting the Battle of Yorktown on Lady Sarah’s lemon-sucking face.

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