It’s the ESPYs, darlings! That means lots of tight dresses and lots of flashy suits. Let’s rate the glitz, shall we?
Alison Brie in Alex Perry
It’s cute, but it feels like something Lea Michelle would have worn to promote the fourth season of Glee.
Andraya Carter
Super hot dress with a major tripping hazard as a bonus. The shoes don’t quite go.
Anna Leigh Waters
Despite the plunging neckline, it feels a little stale and fusty. She looks like she’s wearing an earring on her belly.
Anthony Ramos
Fantastic shades and shoes. The rest is fine, but forgettable.
Chari Hawkins
This is so much fun and the sneakers really make it.
Ciara (in Bronx & Banco) and Russell Wilson
He looks hot but his pants are too short. She looks stunning, although it looks a little tight in the bust.
Da’Vinchi
We loathe that color, but we have to admit it looks good on him. That lapel situation looks like AI gone bad.
Ezra Frech
Perfection.
Flau’jae Johnson
She looks hot, but that looks incredibly uncomfortable to wear and that gigantic knot at the hip looks terrible.
Gabby Thomas in PatBo
This dress is very confused. The sandals are ugly.
Isaiah Hartenstein and Kourtney Kellar Hartenstein
LOVE everything about his suit, from the unexpected color to the surprisingly dramatic pants. We’d ding him for the puddling hems, but he’s eleven thousand feet tall. She looks great. The beige accessories work well with the black dress.
Jared Verse
Great jacket, but the pants are too small.
Jordan Chiles in Cong Tri
When she’s done with it, she can use it to hold fruit on her kitchen counter.
Josh Sweat
It’s fine, but you need to button your jacket and take your phone out of your pants pockets when posing for pictures. The pants are too tight and those things hanging off him are not needed.
MJ Acosta-Ruiz
Can’t argue with that.
Noah Elliott
The fit’s a little off but he looks very cute.
Samantha Tan
It’s fine. We don’t think the bodice design works, with that straight-across bustline over a bra top, but the color looks great on her.
Savy King
The illusion sheer is terrible. You simply can’t use it across the stomach and we don’t understand why designers try. What’s the point in wearing such a sexy dress if it’s going to give the illusion of stretch marks and cellulite? Not that there’s anything shameful about them, but most people aren’t looking to create the illusion of them when they don’t exist.
Shai Gilgeous-Alexander in Ferragamo
SWAG.
Simone Biles in Athleta by Zac Posen
A little bit of babyhead action going on in the bust, and there’s some sort of weird seam in the skirt. Unfortunately, the only thing we like is the color and the textile.
Sloane Stephens
Looks great. We don’t love the shoes, but they’re not a dealbreaker.
Taylor Fritz
Sudden growth spurt, evidently.
Terrell Owens
Cute. Just dressy enough for the setting without being pretentious about it.
Whitney Cummings in Do Long
We wouldn’t have recommended an all-white ensemble for her and we think the design is tacky as hell, but it’s impeccably fitted, we’ll give it that.
Zuri Hall
Flawless.
[Photo Credit: Disney/Stewart Cook]
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