Kittens, the following sad and short roundup is all the testimony we need to offer as to the matter of how incredibly tragic this week’s red carpet offerings were. Just roll up your sleeves and let’s grimly get through this together.
Anna Chlumsky in Adam Lippes
A pretty little seed packet dress. It’s perfectly fine for a Broadway opening night, but it does have the whiff of church clothes to it.
He has a thing for brown suits. He tends to wear them way more than any other celebrity man we can think of. It’s a good color for him, but it doesn’t really present as fresh. It renders him a little Reagan-esque.
It’s a bit of a night gown, but the tights were a cute way to finish it off and it’s nice to see her in something other than her standard black, ruffled dress.
Again: good enough for opening night.
If we were to write a book of this week, it would be called “Good Enough for Opening Night.”
Credit to her for wearing something different, but this comes off like a featureless mess. Granted, it’s not her fault that the background is black, but any situation other than full sunlight was going to render this a mass of black in pictures. And the shoes don’t go.
This is honestly kind of goofy for a comedy-based charity event. Worse, it’s fairly stale.
It keeps getting more hideous as you scroll down.
Not much to say on the style front, but we consider it our duty to offer a palate-cleanser after that last one.
Still dressing like a game show host. Still forcing us to admit that it kind of works for him.
Still, polo shirts under checked sports coats are way too Caddyshack for us.
Naomi Watts in Stella McCartney
This would be a lot better if the white parts weren’t lace. It’s like that old Carol Burnett joke about a character who had to go to a wedding and funeral in the same day.
This all seems in order.
Oof. Let’s just forget this all happened, kittens.
[Photo Credit: INSTARImages]