Friday Leftovers

Posted on May 13, 2016


Darlings, what with the Cannes Film Festival and a whole bunch of premieres this week, there was a metric shit-tonne of red carpetry to choose from. So much so, that we’re probably going to be playing catchup by posting a few over the weekend. So while this is not a goodbye until Monday (we’re also catching up on Orphan Black tomorrow), it is a goodbye to all those ensembles that got crowded out by their betters or more-interestings.

Hit it, also-rans.

Christina Hendricks
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Honey we love you and that’s why we’re telling you to stop. This is a no. You look like an office manager in 1993.



Isla Fisher in Miu Miu
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The fabric is gorgeous but the design is pretty damn moldy.



Julianne Moore in Alexander McQueen

The lower half is fine, but the bodice is a bit too tricky, which is par for the course with her. Also: her makeup looks really weird.



Kate Beckingsale in Vatanika
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What a silly dress. Really now, Kate.



Kristen Stewart in Chanel
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The waistband marks on her belly are ever so soignée, don’t you find?

Girl, stop trying so hard. It’s Chanel. You’re not fooling anyone.




Li Bingbing in Stéphane Rolland
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Simple but gorgeously dramatic.



Martin Freeman
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We feel like he’s run headlong into middle age earlier than he has to. He’s 11 years younger than George Clooney. There’s no reason to be styling himself up like his older brother.

Having said that, the suit and shades are nice. But the hair is aging and he could do with some slightly fresher style choices.



Maya Rudolph in Suno
"The Angry Birds Movie" Los Angeles Premiere - Arrivals

Did she not know there would be photographers? This was such a casual event we kinda wish she’d have gone for jeans and a cute top over that sad schmatta.



Naomi Watts in Michael Kors Collection
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Sparkly goodness. She’s been nailing the movie star looks lately.



Regina King
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She’s pulling off those horizontal stripes rather impressively, but the waist cutouts are unfortunate.



Sarah Jessica Parker in Huishan Zhang
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Sarah, a simple, homespun girl at her first church social.


Susan Sarandon in Jean Paul Gaultier
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This is pretty fucking fabulous.



Victoria Beckham in Victoria Beckham
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We don’t know what the hell is going on with her legs, but the top half looks great.



Yaya DaCosta in Hervé Léger
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If it wasn’t so tight through the crotch and hips, we could be talked into this crazy little jumpsuit. It looks like something Prince would have worn to clean house.




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