Jesse Eisenberg and Kristen Stewart at the “American Ultra” Los Angeles Premiere

Posted on August 19, 2015

Yet another red carpet pairing in which the penis’d one does the bare minimum of work to make himself presentable while the lady presents hours of work and tens of thousands of dollars of merch and beauty services in order to be allowed to stand next to him.

Yes, that’s hyperbolic. Sue us. This shit bugs.

Jesse-Eisenberg-Kristen-Stewart-American-Ultra-Los-Angeles-Movie-Premiere-Red-Carpet-Fashion-Zuhair-Murad-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (1)Jesse Eisenberg and Kristen Stewart attend the premiere of “American Ultra” at Ace Theater Downtown LA in Los Angeles, California. Kristen Stewart is wearing a Zuhair Murad black floral sequin embellished romper paired with Jimmy Choo black pumps.

Jesse-Eisenberg-Kristen-Stewart-American-Ultra-Los-Angeles-Movie-Premiere-Red-Carpet-Fashion-Zuhair-Murad-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (3)

Jesse-Eisenberg-Kristen-Stewart-American-Ultra-Los-Angeles-Movie-Premiere-Red-Carpet-Fashion-Zuhair-Murad-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (4)

Jesse-Eisenberg-Kristen-Stewart-American-Ultra-Los-Angeles-Movie-Premiere-Red-Carpet-Fashion-Zuhair-Murad-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (5)Zuhair Murad Resort 2016 Collection

Jesse-Eisenberg-Kristen-Stewart-American-Ultra-Los-Angeles-Movie-Premiere-Red-Carpet-Fashion-Zuhair-Murad-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (6)

Jesse-Eisenberg-Kristen-Stewart-American-Ultra-Los-Angeles-Movie-Premiere-Red-Carpet-Fashion-Zuhair-Murad-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (2)

 

Still, at least he managed a shirt with buttons. It’s the little victories, darlings.

As for her, the look’s okay, but we’d like it better without such a plunging neckline. The face and hair seem a little half-assed. Super heavy eye makeup, a light lip and yoga hair. It doesn’t make sense to us. As for the shoes, there is disagreement ’round these here parts. Lorenzo thinks she should have chosen sandals and Tom thinks the pumps dress the look up (insofar as a beaded romper requires dressing up).

[Photo Credit: KM/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES, Parisa/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES, Zuhair Murad]

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