T Lo’s Best Red Carpet Looks of 2013 – THE TOP FIVE

Posted on December 31, 2013

Get ready to argue, darlings. We’ll only say this: every year when we compile these lists, even we are surprised by how things shake out once we’ve considered all the factors. We’re both a little surprised and a little pleased by the Best list this year. Which means we expect to hear lots of angry harrumphing in disagreement.

Hit it, Style-Stars!

5. Bruce Willis in Dolce & Gabbana

Bruce Willis attends the premiere of “Red 2” at Westwood Village in Los Angeles in a Dolce&Gabbana white linen suit.



Here it is, the look that caused us to coin a new fashion phrase on the spot. We were so enraptured by the  impeccably sexy, middle-aged perfection of this look (and shocked by the fact that he decided to really go for it this time after decades of mostly not caring) that we ordered all other male stars to Willis it the Fuck Up from now on, every single time they’re out poledancing for their latest multi-million-dollar project. If Bruce can do it, you can do it, boystars. Yippee-ki-yay, motherfuckers. You’re on notice. Perfection is expected from you.



4. Tilda Swinton in Haider Ackermann

Tilda Swinton attends the private view of ‘David Bowie Is’ at Victoria & Albert Museum in London, England in Haider Ackermann.



Truth be told, we struggled with the question of whether or not this deserved to be included. It’s the hem, darlings. It distracts us terribly and saddens us a little that Tilda has fallen for the footless-in-pants red carpet trend. But the fact of the matter is, our picks for best looks mostly tended to be fairly standard dresses and gowns and at the end of the day we adore this look for having some shape and attitude to it, for showing great skill in zhuzhing, and for mixing up a bunch of fabrics that most red carpet denizens would not choose to pair together. It’s the very height of sassy, attitudinal chic. And you couldn’t ask for a better red carpet choice when you’re heading into see a David Bowie retrospective. She knows what she’s doing.



3. Florence Welch in Valentino

Florence Welch attends the American Museum of Natural History’s 2013 Museum Gala in New York City in Valentino.



It pleases us greatly to place Miss Flo here on the Best list, simply because we’ve always adored her work but sadly had to keep using our angry voices whenever she got dressed up. The lady has been, shall we say… struggling to find her style in the spotlight. She’s never gonna be the sexpot or the manic pixie type or even the butch, which tend to be the only options allowed for rocker chicks. She has an intense, intelligent, charismatic persona (and look) and she’s always needed clothing to match that. The fashion world doesn’t always have a lot to offer ladies like her, but this unlikely blend of a Klimt painting and medieval European architecture in gown form was a sublimely perfect choice for her; regal, gorgeous, unusual, and highly eye-catching. It’s easily the best thing she’s ever worn and easily one of the most interesting looks any celebrity’s worn this year.



2. Naomie Harris in Alexander McQueen

Naomie Harris attends the Royal Film Performance of “Mandela: Long Walk To Freedom” at Leicester Square in London in an Alexander McQueen strapless gown with beaded peplum accessorized with Jessica McCormack jewelry.



We struggled with this one, too. Both this look and the next one couldn’t be more red-carpet standard in a lot of ways. We would’ve loved to have picked much more fashion-forward or unusual looks for the top two spots, but at the end of the day, the requirements of the red carpet are rather simple and conservative. No one is there to push the boundaries of fashion. It’s all a very glamorous advertisement for an array of products, from the project being promoted, to the design houses who provide the costumes, to the corporate sponsors whose logos can be found on most red carpet backdrops, to the stars themselves. It’s all part of why we’re so harsh on these celebs. They only have to show up looking accessibly pretty and glamorous and they get a ridiculous amount of help doing it. If they screw it up, they deserve a little derision.

Miss Naomie, however, deserves nothing but praise. She gets the red carpet on an instinctual level – or she’s hired a stylist who does. And while she has worn some trickier numbers than this in the past year, it’s this look that truly takes our breath away with its flawlessness. Simple, yes. But we could put this dress on a dozen other ladystars and none of them would make it sing the way she’s making it sing. It’s the perfect movie star look.



1. Jennifer Lawrence in Calvin Klein

Jennifer Lawrence attends the 2013 Vanity Fair Oscar Party in a Calvin Klein strap gown accessorized with Brian Atwood shoes and Shay jewelry.

And this is, quite clearly, the perfect Oscar winner look. In fact, there’s quite a bit of cockiness on her part in choosing this “WINNER, BITCHES” dress for the after-parties. Because let’s face it: if she’d lost and shown up wearing this, it would have looked a little sad. But in all likelihood, her team had a different, less celebratory dress picked out for the after-parties if someone else had taken the statuette home. This one’s got “victory lap” written all over it.

Again, this isn’t really fashion-forward. In fact, it’s not even all that interesting a design. And truth be told, we’re pretty surprised that we placed a Calvin Klein look at the top of the Best list, because we’re not, shall we say, inclined to fall all over ourselves praising the house aesthetic. But like we said, you couldn’t ask for a more celebratory (in a slightly in-your-face way) dress for her to wear. And considering all the Dior monstrosities she’s been forced into for the last year, we felt it important to point out that she shines and sizzles when you keep things somewhat basic for her. In the end, it’s just a spectacular look, top to bottom. Triumphant, glamorous and sexy. If you asked God Herself to design an Oscar winner’s gown, this is what you’d wind up with.
T Lo’s Best Red Carpet Looks of 2013, Part one and Part two. Collect them all!


[Photo Credit: INFPhoto.com, PRPhotos.com, Getty Images]

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