Kristen Stewart at the Zuhair Murad Fall 2013 Show

Posted on July 08, 2013

Darlings, we’re BACK! Tanned, ready, and well-rested! Itching to tear into some celebrity fashion after our long trek through the wilderness of the July 4th holiday.

Unfortunately, all the celebs pretty much took the weekend off along with us, so pickings are slim this fine morning. Thank Jesus for Miss Kristen, who never fails to generate conversation whenever she steps out the door.


Kristen Stewart attends the Zuahir Murad Fall 2013 couture show at Hotel de Montmorency in Paris.

Zuhair Murad Fall 2012 Couture Collection

Oh, shit. We think we just pissed off Jesus. He wants nothing to do with this one.

Kristen, you are a Special Gift. A Special Gift with a Magical Crotch. And bound breasts. And Payless shoes. Thank you, Kristen, for kicking off our week so magnificently. We think we speak for everyone here when we say your ankle-length panties are just the style shot in the arm the world needed to bring it out of its Monday malaise. You’ve done us all a wonderful service.

Now go home. You’re drunk.


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