Jessica Chastain Needs a Style Intervention

Posted on February 23, 2012

Our hearts really go out to Jessica (as much as they can for a well-paid Oscar nominee living the high life and wearing an endless succession of free clothes worth more than our car). It just that the girl, bless her, has got to be one of the least consistent red carpet denizens we’ve encountered in ages, veering back and forth wildly from looking pretty good to looking like a disaster. We don’t know if it’s a case of a new star trying to figure out her style, a lack of a stylist, or the hiring of more than one stylist which is causing it, but sometimes, she looks like an entirely different person in appearances only a day or two apart.



Jessica Chastain attends a celebration for the 40th anniversary of Sir Charlie Chaplin’s honorary Academy Award in an Elie Saab gown.

Elie Saab Spring 2012 Collection/Daga Ziober (ELITE)

Putting a redhead in a brilliant green gown isn’t exactly the newest idea in the world but there’s a reason it’s such a classic look: it works like crazy. Her makeup and hair are good, but not great.

“Good, but not great” seems to be the high end of the scale for her; the best she can shoot for 9 times out of ten. We think she can do better, but these ladystars are stubborn and don’t always listen to our shrieking.

But really, that’s a whole ‘nother discussion. Let’s talk about what happens when she hits the low end of the style scale. Brace yourselves.

Jessica Chastain attends the Vanity Fair and Juicy Couture ‘Vanities’ 20th Anniversary in an Alexander McQueen dress.

Alexander McQueen Spring 2012 Collection/Sara Blomqvist (VIVA)

YES! That is the SAME person! Swear to god! Except unlike before, where she looked pretty good, here she looks disastrously bad. Is this  perhaps another case of MPD on the RC? Is this her angry alter? Because she sure looks pissed to us. Then again, who wouldn’t be pissed if they went out with their boobs looking like two grapefruits in a sack, chav hair, no eye makeup, clunky shoes and in a suit that clearly belongs to someone else?

Sweetie, may we suggest that experimentation with your style is off the table for now? You need to establish a look and sell that look every time you go out. You’re not a household name yet and if you continue looking like an entirely different person every time you dress up, you never will be. Stick with the uncomplicated pretty-girl dresses with soft hair and makeup for now. McQueen is not for you. Neither is the chav hair.

[Photo Credit: Michael Buckner, Frederick M. Brown, David Livingston/Getty Images,]

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