Grammy Awards 2012 Red Carpet – Part ONE

Posted on February 13, 2012

Darlings, it was, of course, the Grammys red carpet, where purple tuxedo jackets and popes are de rigeur. In other words, a veritable freak show. Hit it, streetwalkers!


Adele in Giorgio Armani

She looked gorgeous.


Alicia Keys in Alexandre Vauthier and Swizz Beatz in Tom Ford

Her look was a little severe, but it mostly worked for her. That neck piece or whatever was a bridge too far. He’s just serving up fabulous. Very few men should try this, but it works for him. Together, they look striking.


Alison Krauss

 Bride caught in a fishing net.


Corinne Bailey Rae in Christian Siriano

 Really cute dress; really bad hair; really wrong shoes.


Cyndi Lauper in Jean Paul Gaultier

You WERQ that shit, girl. Thirty-plus years of never giving a shit what anyone thought of you, so why should you start now?


Deanna Carter

 Pretty enough, but kind of bland. Platforms with a gown. Tsk.


Fergie in Jean Paul Gaultier Couture

 This ho crazy.


Greta Bech

Ohmigod, stop that, you jackass. It already looks like a skating costume, you don’t need to help the effect along.


John Legend

He’s so cute and this looks like a pretty great suit, which is why it was KILLING us that he was walking around with it unbuttoned.


Kate Beckinsale in Zuhair Murad

 Cocktail waitress at Caesar’s Palace.


Kathy Griffin

 Oh, Miss Kathy! You finally found a color that looks soft and flattering on you, instead of the usual harsh and attention-seeking shades you favor!


Kelly Osbourne in Tony Ward

Still hate the hair and this dress gets a little complicated at parts, but she looks pretty great.


Linda Ramone

It’s such a rare occurrence when someone manages to get literally every single aspect of her look wrong, from hair down to feet. It’s like a fashion eclipse or something.

Bless her heart.


Mario Lopez

Men are wearing tuxedos here. Put on a fricking tie.


Nicki Minaj in Versace

What hath Gaga wrought?

This is how it’s gonna be from now on, isn’t it? Someone’s gonna try each year for an “egg moment.” We can just see it: By 2020, the Grammys red carpet will be nothing but a sea of eggs, meat dresses, religious iconography, and fairy tale characters.

They even coined the term last night: “egg moment.” We’re even using it. Shoot us in the heads right now. Right this second.

Okay, credit where it’s due: it really was a “moment” and pretty much defined the night. Just as last year will always be “that time Gaga showed up in an egg,” she made this year’s Grammys all about that time Nicki showed up with the pope.


Paris Hilton

 That dress is too nice for this smacked ass.


Rihanna in Giorgio Armani

High-priced call girl in ’80s TV movie of the week.



 Mental patient.


Shawna Thompson

 Yikes. It’s like a Miss Las Vegas pageant gown. She needs a sash and a tiara with sparklers mounted on it.


Skylar Grey

The shoes were an inspired choice for this dress, which looks quite good on her. We think the hem could have gone up an inch or two. And we hate the hair.


Taraji P. Henson in Brian Rennie

To paraphrase Maggie Smith’s Lady Trentham, “Difficult colors, pink and brown.” They work great for cupcake shops decor, but not so much on this dress.


[Photo Credit: Getty]

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