Dakota Johnson Goes Basic Mermaid at the Green Carpet Fashion Awards in Milan

Posted on September 26, 2017

Y’know, Miss Dakota, you really almost had us with this one. We were thisclose to declaring it kind of chic and vaguely glamorous, which is pretty much what we’d title your style biography, if such a thing existed. Dakota Johnson: Kind of Chic and Vaguely Glamorous.

Anyway, as we said, we would have declared this a winning look, except there was one wholly distracting design element that prevented us from doing so.

Sea anemone boobs. They really shouldn’t be a thing, dear. Unless you’re a mermaid, and even then, we suspect the bitchy, judgmental mermaids would find them terribly basic.

What we’re trying to say is they’re a NO, in any situation. You got pretty badly Gucci’d here, girl.

 

 

 

Style Credits:
Custom Gucci Black Bead-Embellished Tulle Gown

[Photo Credit: Riccardo Giordano/IPA/INSTARimages.com, INSTARImages.com]

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