“MWAH! Come to Aruba! Our women are hot, affectionate, and semi-naked!”
“No! You should come to Ecuador, where we use our skirts to fly!”
“Aw! Aren’t you sweet, Ecuador.”
“Australia. We’re so butch, our drag queens are straight men.”
“Arise, my big-skirted sisters! ARISE AND TAKE BACK THE WORLD FROM MEN.”
“Oh, honey. If we didn’t have men, where would I get all my things? Bolivia abstains from fighting.
But not from love-making. With men.“
“I’m fucking fabulous and you all know it.”
“Finland! Birthplace of the tourniquet!”
“Right. I get to be Miss Britain the year they decide to tart her up. Cheers for that, bitches.”
“Guyanese Tiger Women are known for their impressive upper and lower back strength!”
“The Dominican Republic graciously accepts Ghana’s challenge and invites the bitch to step off.”
“Step off yourself, you bougie tw–“
“ENOUGH! Puerto Rico has the floor!
And you can have it too for low, low prices! Go to prdiscountflooring.gov for more information!”
“WHHHHOOOOOOOO! PARTY TIME IN NICARAGUA! WE’VE GOT THE GOOD SHIT!”
“Sweden finds this all too revolting for words.”
“Mexico thinks Sweden’s a priss with a princess complex, but for once, we agree. Can’t a girl just stand here and be hot as fuck without putting other people down?
Peace. Think about it.”
“The secret to a Portuguese woman’s allure? Her feet face sideways.”
“On the back of my skirt, you can read today’s menu specials, which include your choice of a cup of soup or a side salad with every meal.”
“Not gonna lie, we really half-assed it this year, guys. I don’t know how it happened. I misread the dates or something.”
“MARIE ANTOINETTING, HIGH EMPRESS OF SHOWGIRLS.
BOWING IS NOT OPTIONAL.”
[Photo Credit: Richard D. Salyer, Patrick Prather]