George Clooney and Amal Alamuddin Get Married

Good morning, kittens. Happy Monday, which is the cruelest of oxymorons. Grab your cup and meet us in the T Lo conference room. It’s time to engage in the grand old tradition that has brought gals and gays together for centuries, forging a sister-to-sister bond that can never be broken.

Let’s judge someone’s wedding, darlings.

We brought donuts.

PinGeorge Clooney and Amal Alamuddin spotted leaving the Aman Hotel in Venice, Italy the day after their wedding. Amal Alamuddin is wearing a Giambattista Valli couture dress accessorized with Heidi London sunglasses and Giambattista Valli pumps.

PinGiambattista Valli Spring 2014 Couture

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Okay, first off: they are a ridiculously glamorous couple. Suddenly, she seems inevitable; as if we all have agreed that of COURSE this is the type of woman George Clooney would marry; not just glamorous, but highly sophisticated and stylish in an international kinda way, and most importantly, extremely well-accomplished, probably more so than he is. That she’s stunning is a given; that she’s a woman of substance is a surprise.

Second: We were a bit surprised to hear how elaborate this wedding was. Not that it sounded tacky or ostentatious in a Kimye kind of way. Everything sounds very tasteful and even fun, but we wouldn’t have thought that he’d engage in a celebrity studded fashion show that went on for several days. We suppose we sound like we’re judging them for it, which is a charge we can live with, but we really thought they were going to quietly marry somewhere and announce it after the fact; especially after Brad and Angie’s wedding, which we still think pretty much set the template for A-list star weddings going forward.

Then again, jumping into your boat to ride up and down Venetian waterways from party to party in clothes that cost more than a car? There are plenty of worse ways to spend your wedding weekend.

In fashion news, he looks uncharacteristically impeccable and she looks amazing, but that skirt’s kinda silly.

Let’s all come together and agree to continue to treat her like the accomplished woman she is and not a vessel for George Clooney’s potential baby, yes? Because you know that’s what’s going to happen.

[Photo Credit: FameFlynetUK/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES]

• Amal Alamuddin
• George Clooney
• Giambattista Valli
• Giambattista Valli Couture
• Heidi London
• Pairs Division