Jessica Alba in Antonio Berardi on “Good Morning America”

Posted on August 13, 2014

Ugh. This is…

Actually, you know what? This is a PERFECT example …

Jessica-Alba-Good-Morning-America-TV-Style-Antonio-Berardi-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (1)Jessica Alba makes an appearance on “Good Morning America” to promote her new movie “Sin City: A Dame to Kill For” in an Antonio Berardi dress paired with Brian Atwood ‘Tribeca’ platform sandals and jewelry by Melissa Kaye and Vita Fede.

Jessica-Alba-Good-Morning-America-TV-Style-Antonio-Berardi-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (2)Antonio Berardi Resort 2015 Collection

Jessica-Alba-Good-Morning-America-TV-Style-Antonio-Berardi-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (3)

Jessica-Alba-Good-Morning-America-TV-Style-Antonio-Berardi-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (4)

Jessica-Alba-Good-Morning-America-TV-Style-Antonio-Berardi-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (5)

Jessica-Alba-Good-Morning-America-TV-Style-Antonio-Berardi-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (6)


… of exactly the kind of style we have the least interest in, when it comes to celeb-lady style. That WAY-too-precious, retro, wifey-poo style. Under any circumstances, we would probably consider this dress a little basic, but inoffensive. You add a pony tail and those SUPER tacky shoes and it just goes south immediately. Let’s have a re-do.

Keep the dress, add a thin red belt, blow the shit out of that hair, put a bold, confident bag on her arm, and switch out those stripper heels for something a little more tasteful and neutral.

Your turn. She has to keep the dress, but you can change everything else, even the wearer, if you can think of a more appropriate celebrity to wear this particular combination of Stepford Wife/streetwalker.



[Photo Credit: PacificCoastNews, Antonio Berardi]

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  • Danielle

    PLEASE don’t tell me she removed the pockets. My heart can’t take it.

  • ninamadeleine

    I actually love that dress, but those shoes just KILL ME. Even those naked sandals would look better, and I love the idea of a belt.

    • Heather Innis

      The dress is adorable, but how does she not see that she’s wearing stripper shoes?

      • marlie

        No taste?

        • Jane Donuts

          Bad taste. :)

        • greymain


      • leahpapa

        I think some stars/stylists get taken with the idea that it’ll be a winky kind of juxtaposition, like: the dress, so demure! the shoes, so naughty! I do think juxtapositions of that type can work – say, a bit of leather to toughen up ethereal knits – but in this case it’s uninspired and dissonant.

        Full disclosure on “oof” shoe moments: On my second date with my now husband, in the mid-aughts when such a thing might be considered droll, I wore a big crinoline skirt with a velvet jacket and…wait for it…cowboy boots. I know now how cringe-worthy that was, but I sure did feel like a million bucks. (He still asks me why I don’t wear that skirt anymore, and I say, “I boxed it up with all my other misbegotten SATC delusions.”)

        • CelandineM

          What a great fashion story! I chuckled about your husband asking you about skirt.

        • Jane Donuts

          Ha! I too have cringe inducing memories of vintage cowboy boot ensembles I wore in the mid-aughts. I still have the boots, but they sit in the back of the closet and make me feel a little queasy when I encounter them.

          • leahpapa

            Mine were from…[suppressing my gag reflex]…Aldo. Not even, like, bona fide cowboy boots from Texas or something – cheapos from the mall. I wore them with a cut-off denim pleated skirt and those fake vintage t’s from Urban Outfitters. Man, I must have a great personality, because ain’t nobody gonna marry you on the basis of that wardrobe… 😉

          • Jane Donuts

            Maybe he just took you for a fixer upper. 😉

          • leahpapa

            I just snarfed at my desk. Oh, gurl. That was (is?) true in so, so many ways.

          • Anna

            Good ol’ Aldo. I had Baby Spice-style platform sneakers from there. I thought I was flyest chick at frosh week. And so did every other girl wearing them, I’m sure.

          • marlie

            I’m stuck on “cut-off denim pleated skirt.” Pleated.

          • leahpapa

            YUP. Puh. Leated. And I decided it was too long, so I cut it off. With scissors. Without measuring first, so it was sort of unintentionally asymmetrical.

          • marlie

            As was suggested elsewhere in this thread… you’d better hope there’s no photographic evidence, lest someone try to blackmail you with it.

          • KinoEye

            I had a pleated denim MINI skirt. I think it might still be in my old closet, each pleat reminding me of my terrible, terrible fashion decisions as a teen. It’s probably hanging next to the short, black and white polka-dotted bubble skirt.

          • kimmeister

            I didn’t even think denim could be pleated!

          • demidaemon

            You were just ahead of the trends! Now that Aldo is on PR, it is obviously the next big thing.

          • Jackie4g


          • Spreecord

            On my first date with my husband, back when this millenium was still a baby, I wore a floor length denim skirt slit up to the knees on both sides, and purple tank top with some sort of flower-and-crystals decoration on it. Mmmm, hot.

        • kimmeister

          Somewhere around 1999/2000, I owned a leopard print cowboy hat. There is photographic evidence of me wearing it at a concert. *wincing*

          • leahpapa

            All I can think of is that 30 ROCK episode where Liz decides to start “rocking cowboy hat that a KISS FM deejay one called ‘a sweet lid.'” AND I LOVE IT.

          • kimmeister

            Get this – I actually got rid of it because it was too small for my huge dome and gave me a headache! Not because it was a leopard. print. cowboy hat.

          • Skippymom1

            I am afraid if someone comes across that pic’ kimmeister you may be in for an eternal life of blackmail. I burned all the pics of me wearing my pink Chucks with the plaid insides, that accessorized my pink oversized [think Flashdance] sweatshirt dress. The 80’s – the decade I like to refer to as “What were we thinking.”

          • ashtangajunkie

            We must have been shopping at the same stores back then. I had one too. :)

          • bitchybitchybitchy

            Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to find those pics and destroy. Cue the Mission Impossible music.
            We’ve all had those fashion faux pas moments.

          • kimmeister

            Well, they make 2014 me look like the most fabulous creature who has ever walked the earth in comparison. Worth keeping just for that!

          • bitchybitchybitchy

            That is a good reason to keep those pics-showing off your style evolution!

        • conniemd

          I grew up in an area that was half cowboy and half hippie in the 60’s and 70’s. I wouldn’t been caught dead in cowboy boots. I tended towards the floor length tie die or denim skirts :) so I do understand your horror at your past fashion tastes. :)

        • BayTampaBay

          I am sure it and you looked great. When styled correctly, I love a big crinoline skirt .

          ETA: I do not think that dress is “that Bad”.

    • jen

      Right?! Anything is better than those stripper monstrosities.

    • Adrianna Grężak

      I can’t wait for these stripper platforms to be over. We’re gonna look back in horror

    • BayTampaBay

      Agree with your solution 100%.

    • carnush

      Exactly. Way to ruin an adorable dress. Even basic ballet flats would look great with it…red ones.

  • Kathy_Marlow

    I could see this on Fanning the Younger with a pair of her funky shoes and be totally cute.

  • Firecat

    I want to see Nicole Kidman Stepford the hell out of this.

    • bitchybitchybitchy

      I like the sound of Stepford the hell out of. Nicole could wear this, and you just know that she’d be taking no prisoners.

      • MoHub

        She’d also be wearing white stiletto pumps with that dress.

        • bitchybitchybitchy

          Indeed she would.

  • hughman

    I would retro Betty Page the shit out of this. Some black strappy bondage heels, a red lip, a cat eye and bangs. Throw in some chunky bangle bracelets and we’re suddenly interesting!

    • Gatto Nero

      I could see Katy Perry in that.

      • ConnieBV

        And I saw Krysten Ritter.

        • misstressofsylar

          I mis Ritter. Someone give her a show stat! Her pole dance was really interesting.

    • greymain

      oh yeah!

  • mommyca

    I’ll go with flats and a jean jacket…

  • krelnick

    Macrame belt, white Keds

  • Anplica Fiore

    How has Reese missed this dress for her Parking Lot Tour?

    • lunchcoma

      You know, I think Reese might be able to carry it off. I think she’d pair it with a jacket or a cardigan to take away a bit of the princess vibe.

      • CelandineM

        I see Reese pulling off what you described with the skirt version, the dress would overwhelm her petite frame.

      • StellaZafella

        Reese would,likely, partner this dress with a $4000.00 Denim Jacket.

      • MoHub

        A short-sleeved white linen bolero with a big brooch on the lapel?

    • StarburstLady

      This is a shade of pink that blondes can’t wear without looking exactly like a Barbie doll. Trust me, I bought something nearly identical to this once and only then realized I could never, ever wear it.

    • alyce1213

      She’d need to lop off the entire bottom piece to make it more little-girlie, wear it with her open-toe white mules, and the wrong color bag. (I like to pick on Reese.)

  • Alejandra

    high classical style FLOTUS: kitten heels, edgy belt, sass

  • Pablo

    I nominate Aubrey Plaza for a shorter version of the dress and obviously with different shoes.

  • Karen Belgrad

    I want to see this on Chloe Sevigny, as her newest alter “Ruth, the 1950’s housewife”

  • Scimommy

    I was all “Put this on January Jones!” and then I realized I’m basically styling Betty Draper. :(

    ETA: Ok, I got it. Put this on Cate Blanchett with some of her awesome flat sandals and a wide white belt with a buckle. There.

    • marlie

      I could totally see Cate wearing this with a really funky pair of flats or sandals. Maybe even a pair of the shoes that Kate Mara has worn the last couple of days? I don’t particularly like them myself, but they’d definitely take this out of Stepford.

  • Mary Elizabeth Poytinger Baume

    why is it so wrinkle-ly??

  • crash1212

    I like all of your ideas, Uncles T and Lo, but I would be happy if she’d just ditch the shoes. Those are horrific in any setting and should be burned. I don’t particularly love the high pony, but I don’t hate it either. I’m just happy to see that she embraced the knowledge that she’d be sitting in those rediculous high stool chairs thingies and didn’t wear a mini skirt as so many dopes do. The full longer skirt was definitely the way to go here. Somebody was looking out for her.

  • hyperionic

    I actually hate the cut of this dress and can’t think of anyone it would look good on. I’d probably just give it to Elle Fanning to do what she wants with.

  • marlie

    This is a really, really cute dress, and she RUINED IT by wearing SILVER PLATFORM STRIPPER HEELS. My apologies for yelling, kittens.

    For Jessica, I’m thinking cobalt blue accessories. Maybe some strappy heels? Though I think heels AND a purse in that shade of blue might be too much. And fix the way that one shoulder of the dress is riding up (though I think it’s a tad bit too small for her).

    But I’d rather just pack this dress up and ship it to Lupita, or maybe even Kiera Knightly (it’s not a huge leap from her typical “twee” look to “modern Stepford wife”.

  • Anna

    I’d burn the shoes. As is though, it is a perfect “Leaving the gym” outfit for certain people.

    • KateShouldBeWorking

      You shady bitch, come sit next to me.

      • Anna

        *wishes for more book signings/real BK meet-ups*

  • jworick

    I think a jean jacket, messy topknot, and some espadrilles or thong sandals would have made it look fresh, not Stepford.

    • Joanna

      I think Emma Stone and a jean jacket and some flats would cure all the wrong in this outfit!

  • Roz

    Hair–straight, side-swept bangs. Loose, cropped, lightweight boat neck pullover. Maybe ballet flats. And some really killer sunglasses.

  • decormaven

    I’m too traumatized by those awful heels to make a valid comment.

  • Capt. Renault

    Another graduate from the R. Crumb School of Hair and Cosmetology.

    • Wink

      Her brows don’t look right.

  • In_Stitches

    Saying put it on Lupita is essentially cheating, but nevertheless….put it on Lupita!

    On Jessica, I’m thinking black leather booties to play up with the punk elements of the print.

  • enchanted216

    It all looks very JLo to me, but I really don’t think that color pink is doing her any favors, and it’s too tight in the bodice. Add the pony tail and stripper shoes, and increase the tacky factor by 10. If the dress fit correctly, change the color, and some non-hooker metallic sandals and a cute Kate Spade bag……oh, and a steam iron for the wrinkles!

  • lunchcoma

    She looks like she’s headed off to her Sweet Sixteen. Not a good look on an adult.

    • marlie

      That’s a lot of boob for a (hypothetical) 16 year old.

      • Sarah

        Yeah, those shoes are Sweet Stripper Sixteen.

      • kimmeister

        That’s a lot of boob for a morning show appearance at any age.

        • marlie

          I was going to say that in my comment, but I thought I was being prudish. 😛

  • gksp

    The shoes. Ridiculous. Hideous. Tacky. Unflattering. Stupid. Incomprehensible.

  • International Model

    Doesn’t her lips burn from wearing frosted pink lip gloss – the only gloss approved by Satan?

    • ashtangajunkie

      Ha! “The Official Lip Colour of Evil and Suffering.”

  • IngerMereteH

    Just bought a dress with the same colour combo and realize now that it will be hard to accessoirize. How about Kerry Washington / blowout hair / black ballerina flats / mid-size, retro-funky (no nails or anything) bag? In a Kate Spade-ish style? Maybe a narrow black belt? And discreet silver jewellry?

    • FibonacciSequins

      Sounds good to me. You could even do bold silver jewelry.

      • IngerMereteH

        Yes. Bold, but not too intricate, I think, so that it is not fighting with the print. I see people suggest navy shoes, that would also be a good idea.

        • FibonacciSequins

          Yes-bold but simple.

        • Constant Reader

          I’d like to see this with a short, chunky necklace. Not busy, just chunky.

  • Jessi03

    Can I put it on Kerry Washington with a blowout and better shoes? ANY other shoes? I’ll take the yellow pumps that were trendy 2 seconds ago.

  • KateShouldBeWorking

    Switch out for basic pumps and slap it on Barbara Eden.

  • Thomas

    Why does she always wear her hair like that?

    • Qitkat

      In all seriousness, if she always does, she ought to stop. Immediately. My mom always blamed her thinning hair as she grew older from wearing tight braids back in the forties, the kind that wrapped around her head.

  • MilaXX

    Can we just have a #ShoeFail tag?
    Okay I’ll play along. Take the hair out of the ponytail, give the shoes back to Courtney Stodden, lose the bag, skinny navy belt, borrow a pair of white sandals from Reese. She has at least 3 different pairs that would work better than the ones she’s wearing now.

    • marlie

      That would be just about every tag. Also, BURN.

    • Jacob Bowen

      COURTNEY STODDEN, NO! I am pretty sure I just got her name/image out of my head!!!

  • Imasewsure

    I could live with all of this for GMA – except those hiddy shoes… Any cute little sandal, flat or normal pump would be fine. The dress is cute

  • In_Stitches

    She looks like she’s cosplaying as Ariana Grande with that hair.

    • PastryGoddess

      She needs about 5 more pounds of extensions to even come close to La Grande’s hairtrosity

      • In_Stitches

        Hairtrosity! I love it. I wonder if it’s even sewn in or if it’s just one giant clip on she sticks to the back of her head any time she leaves the house. She never takes it out of that ponytail…

      • demidaemon

        Also, a truly insufferable facial expression.

  • Sarah

    Is she carrying a Lisa Frank Trapper Keeper? Because THAT would maybe let me forgive her heinous shoes. But, I’m a hater when it comes to her, so probably not.

  • PastryGoddess

    Hair: blow out with big bouncy curls. No cocker spaniel hair though
    Shoes: sandals in a bronze metallic or even navy. Naked shoes would be ok here
    jewelry: put some on for gods sake!. That neckline is dying for a pendant or necklace. Some more THERE earrings and possibly a cocktail ring would also have helped
    Belt: something skinny to match the shoes
    Wearer: Cate Blanchett would wear the shit out of this dress

  • BlairBear

    I would like to see Keira Knightley in this with her typical hair and a pair of black or gray thick strappy sandals (not the naked ones) and a bold cuff and quirky clutch. Or Jessica Pare styled in pointy pumps for a mad men event

  • Gabby

    I covet that dress so hard. I don’t hate the super high pony, but I think big lush bombshell hair would look amazing. Those shoes are totally the worst. And I don’t like her makeup either…too strong, especially on the eyes.

  • Gatto Nero

    I’d like to see someone go over-the-top fun retro in a shorter version of this dress rather than take the Stepford-wife route.

  • FibonacciSequins

    Agree about the red belt and give her red lips too. Junk the stripper shoes and give her a pair of navy blue (or yellow) sandals. Let her have normal hair, not a Pebbles do. Finish with a silver cuff.

    Why is she in Soho? I thought GMA’s studios were in Midtown.

  • mitch45

    beach waves, simple dark brown pointed toe pumps. thin light pink belt…. ?

  • SewingSiren

    Is one eyelid heavier than the other?

  • RescueMe23

    Very loose french braid – small navy leather belt – white flat sandals. Some type of necklace though I’m not really a jewelry person myself. I’m in a rut and wear the same earrings almost every day without thinking.
    I need a style overhaul…

  • LJCdoc

    New alter for Chloe?

  • Wendi126

    Amy Sedaris with a red pussy bow around the waist and clunky white shoes

  • Qitkat

    Betty Draper goes to the school farm outing and picnic with her son.

  • rkdgal

    I can’t get past the fact that her eyebrows are totally archless right now. Is that going to be a new thing?

    • kimmeister


  • Sanglots longs

    Side part and low ponytail with a bit of a wave/curl; pea-green sling-back pumps; grayed chartreuse belt. I.e., accessories in complementary color to the pink, in about the same value, but less bright and saturated. I like that lantern-shaped skirt of this dress, but the fabric seems a little flimsy.

  • kimmeister

    I’d put this on Kiernan Shipka with a white cami underneath, thin kelly green belt, and white espadrilles.

  • Nopinkertons

    Who cares about the boring dress? I’d like to see someone in that white coat on the model….

  • Jacob Bowen

    I would totally do a trendy pop of color shoe (I even think an orange/pink combo would change it from sickeningly sweet to a bit more playful). I would put a belt on…maybe navy blue, or if she HAS to have silver in their somewhere that would be fine, and I would give her a hairstyle similar to the models, with her hair down, wavy, and a bit messy. JBF hair may be the key to toning down the Barbie aspect of this dress.

  • Lisalady161

    One of the cutest actresses out there, and she’s channeling JLo. Sad, sad, sad. I don’t even want to do a restyle here, this is so tragic.

  • Alicia

    Forest green kitten heel sandals, soft blow out on the hair, get a minion to carry your stuff so you don’t need a bag.

    • alyce1213

      Kitten heels are so right for this dress. I thought I’d seen the end of clunky platforms.

  • Skippymom1

    When I saw the shoes I expected the dress to be a pull away number with a silver thong and pasties underneath. I assumed she was promoting her upcoming movie “Striptease II”. And of course with one flick of her wrist the pony tail would have fallen with a flourish and a neck snap shake to highlight he sexy, luxurious curls.
    Now THAT would’ve been some good morning television.

  • MilaXX

    This shade of pink is soft enough that she could have literally spun the color wheel and come up with a thousand colors to contrast this with and she choose, SILVER HOOKER HEELS.

  • TinyDynamo

    Lupita would make this sing – the color & shape would be heart stopping!

    • boweryboy

      Was just about the write the same…

      • GeoDiva

        Me too! Ms. Lupita would rock this.

      • TinyDynamo

        The more I think about it, the more pissed I get that La Lupita wasn’t given this first! She could do red accents or even bright acidy yellow. Harrumph.

  • boweryboy

    I find the shoes the most offensive thing here. I would swap those out for a pair of chartreuse kitten heels or slingbacks with a matching skinny belt and then hide that horribe hair under a giant floppy straw hat with a pink sash and some Audrey Hepburn-esque sunglasses.
    Or put the dress on Lupita. That pink would sing against her skin.

  • Rebecca Harvey

    What’s with the horizontal seam in the skirt? It’s like they started with a shorter dress, realized that the neckline made it too hoochie, so they lengthened the skirt to compensate.

  • kmk05

    She looks like a cream puff. Or cotton candy on a stick. If the dress were any other colour, maybe I would like it more. As it is, she should just go home. This is terrible from head to toe.

  • KT

    The dress is actually really cool, and the bold graphic print gives it a sort of edge, actually. This is just the worst possible styling ever.

    I could see Lupita making this shit work for her in a great way (though I’d make the skirt more flowy and less… cupcake-y). I could also see Nina Dobrev wearing this, or maybe even SJP.

    It definitely needs a belt, and I kind of like the idea of black accessories for this dress. Nothing too heavy or oppressive looking, but just enough to give it a little bit of an edge.

  • Wink

    Jessica Simpson loves hooker/stripper heels, and she can (usually) pull off that look because she seems to be in on the joke. When others wear hooker/stripper heels, they just look like … well, like this.

    • kmk05

      It’s also that Jessica Simpson is not as waifish as Jessica Alba: regardless of her weight fluctuations, she has muscled thighs and calves and a larger frame, so the stripper heels don’t look as out of context and she can carry them better.

  • fromanotherplanet

    Sharpie eyebrows? Fix it Jesus.

  • evave2

    The shoes and the purse are awful, I mean REALLY awful. I don’t like the hair, but who am I to judge really? The dress does not wow me, I think it looks too full on her.

    But I am going to say again that this last year the designers have been sending out the models as HIDEOUS counterpoints to their clothing. What is the deal with that? Are they so unsure of their clothes that they need to make the models ugly so they don’t distract from the clothes? Jiminee cricket.


    Maybe give her a half inch of breathing room in the bodice so it doesn’t split if she sneezes.

  • MinAgain

    The shoes are an abomination.

  • MissusBee

    Taylor Swift would wear this (not in a good way).

    I’m almost thinking Kristen Wiig could make this work as she has enough edge to take the Barbie-ness out of it, while still being elegant. But even then it’s going to be a bit precious. Or go the other way – JLo with sky-high wedges, huge blowout and a baubly necklace.

    I dunno. I keep trying to imagine it in different colors. Black and white ubertrend aside, I can’t help think this would look quite chic in monochrome. Or if it was in neon green at least someone could have fun with it.

    • Kitten Mittons

      Yes, something besides pink might work better.

  • demidaemon

    That dress violates my eyes, so, unfortunately, it needs to go. It’s way too Barbie, and considering what she is schilling, the absolute wrong way to go.

    • Kitten Mittons

      I want to like it, but she’s made it way too boobtastic. The sweetness of the dress, with that much cleavage and stripper shoes, just seems all wrong.

  • frannyprof

    Ugh. Can’t the stripper platform trend just die, already?

  • bitchybitchybitchy

    Black patent pumps and a black belt are one possible improvement. Or, plain black pumps, a really cute clutch. The silver shooves really are horrific.

  • gracedarling

    Tennis shoes and headscarf. She could really pull off Eva Mendes Lite.

  • PastryGoddess

    All she’s missing is the apple pie, apron, and hot pads

  • cocohall

    It looks like Miss Alba is going to host a Toddlers and Tiaras pageant. This would look PERFECT in some third rate convention ballroom surrounded by crying babies made up to look like Anna Nicole Smith. Venue venue venue, darling.

  • PinkyK

    Do those shoes come with a pole?

  • Garcia Loca

    Why would a grown-ass woman with a career of her own want to style herself after Arianna Grande?

    • GemFemme


  • Yoshio

    Her facial expression is one of monumental discomfort. This is all wrong and can not be redeemed. One must wipe the slate clean and start again.

  • OffToSeeHim

    Does it say she’s on Good Morning America? Because those aren’t 9:00 in the morning heels! Yikes!

    • MilaXX

      They are if you’re doing the walk of shame.

  • Jo Koster

    OK, Lupita in the dress, Oscar de la Renta’sPavé Crystal Pansy Waist Belt in Black Jet, Coach Bleeker mini-duffle in black, Louboutin Leonor Fini open-toed heels. Or else Louboutin’s white Wedgie Lady sandals. (Miss Lupita goes for matchy, so she would probably prefer Louboutin’s Gardnera sandals, but I’m not letting her go matchy.) How’s that?

    • OffToSeeHim

      See, if you’re going to post that kind of straight-up knowledge, you have to link off to the pieces you’re talking about so we peasants can educate ourselves! :-)

  • Kaonashi

    Stripper shoes is right. And the dress isn’t anything to write home about either.

  • elzatelzabelz

    Reese Witherspoon, sandals or wedges, fabulous hat, hair down, on her parking lot tour.

  • Fordzo a.k.a. Fancy Mukluks

    Helena Bonham Carter, add a black crinoline, her black orthopedic shoes, and a bird’s nest on her head with a fish net veil. No to a necklace; yes to a stethoscope.

  • colormehappy

    Also: those caterpillar eyebrows NEED TO GO. And the frosted lips. The normally enviable Jessica Alba looks like Spock in drag on planet Stepford.

  • Columbinia

    What TLo said. Well, maybe the hair in a sedate French twist or chignon. Yes to the belt, bold bag and neutral pumps, add a cuff bracelet and turquoise earrings.

  • elizonthelam

    Eva Mendes, rocking some sort of primarily sky/cyan blue patterned head scarf, skinny yellow belt, wedge sandals. Or red flat sandals of some sort…but i like lots o’color

  • Sally

    I think the look on her face says it all.

  • NBG

    The shoes took this outfit into J. Lo territory. Not necessarily a good thing if you don’t have J. Lo’s attitude to pull it off.

    • Kimberlini

      Actually, I’d love to see this dress on JLo with all of the styling edits recommended by TLo. Especially the shoes. Gotta get rid of those gawdawful shoes. And the dress can’t be too tight! It would be nice to see JLo look daytime tasteful.

  • Stefanie Argudo Mackenzie

    Nicole Kidman in The Stepford Wives getup; that’s all.

  • blue808

    what’s up with the spock eyebrows?

  • Kikishua

    I really like the dress. I hate the shoes (but I always hate those shoes). The bag is inoffensive to me. And the ponytail would give me a headache, but she is pretty enough for sleek. I guess I like the Stepford Wife look.

    I fail at snark and Bitter Kittenness. *slinks away, shamed*

  • Sara Brams-Miller

    I love the silver of the shoes. But I am NOT in love with the stripper style.

  • luluransom

    Oh I love the idea of a thin RED belt, lads! The dress is extremely flattering on her, I kinda love it. But holy heck, the shoes and hair.


    Loose chignon, black patent skinny belt & strappy sandals. Red clutch…..

  • siriuslover

    If she’s gonna keep that dress in the NY summer, she should wear a cute pair of stripy sandals (the flatter the better). Lose the bag entirely. Not sure of a belt for this dress, but I do like your idea of a thin read belt. No idea whatsoever with her hair. Maybe cut it and give her a cute summery bob.

  • Coco Chanel

    9 year old’s dress with stripper heels

    • Fordzo a.k.a. Fancy Mukluks

      It’s like a birthday party at a titty bar.

      • Coco Chanel

        Interesting parallel isn’t it?

  • Beto

    Isn’t that Ariana Grande? (a more adult, that is). Shoe style for that dress is a clear mistake

  • DuBey2

    I can’t get over the shock that she’s actually got a movie.

  • AmeliaEve

    That pink and white combo screams “Lilly Pulitzer” to me. Loose half pony, green leather belt, low white wedges, wicker bag, and maybe a pale yellow cardigan around the shoulders.

  • Jessica Peterson

    That high ponytail gives me the ragies.

  • Ali2044

    This is Michelle Obama’s dress. And what does Jessica Alba even do anymore? Why are we seeing her?

  • Angela

    I love the dress although I would shorten the length on her but ugh YES those shoes are a disaster. I can’t imagine any outfit they would be good with unless you had some slacks you didn’t want to hem ha ha. I disagree about her hairstyle though, I think she looks gorgeous. I hate the red belt idea personally but I’m sure that would make it more stylish for some. I’m a fan of simple and she nailed it except for the shoes. I have really enjoyed reading everyone’s take on it though.