Miley Cyrus in Chanel in Los Angeles

Posted on July 14, 2014

It’s been a while since we checked in on Miss Smacked Ass 2014.

Miley-Cyrus-Chanel-RFPJS-GOTSLA-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (1)Miley Cyrus leaves Warwick night club with friends in Los Angeles in a Chanel jumpsuit.

Miley-Cyrus-Chanel-RFPJS-GOTSLA-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (2)

Miley-Cyrus-Chanel-RFPJS-GOTSLA-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (3)

Miley-Cyrus-Chanel-RFPJS-GOTSLA-Tom-Lorenzo-Site-TLO (4)

Nothing’s changed, we see.

Jeez, Heidi Klum had us momentarily believing in the wild-print pantsuit, but here comes Miley, to shatter the illusion. It’s hard to believe this is Chanel, but then again, clothes have a way of suddenly looking downscale the minute she puts them on. Did she ruin this one, we wonder? Or would it be bad no matter who wore it?

In other news, those shoes are hideously wrong with the outfit and the flower is just plain hideously wrong.

This has been your judgmental report on all things Miley. Or at least, on all the things Miley is wearing in these pictures. In summation: Still a smacked ass.





[Photo Credit: Devone Byrd/PacificCoastNews]

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  • fiddlecub

    My only thought: She is sooooooo drunk and high. And based on those shoes, I imagine she probably started the night that way.

    • PinkyK

      That is exactly what I was thinking…

    • Vtg Fashion Library

      Them’s some mighty dilated pupils. Maybe that makes the shoes look better?

  • kimmeister

    Those are particularly huge armscyes. Combined with unfortunate tattoo placement.

    • Sarah

      Liked for vocab! (And agreed.)

      • kimmeister

        I learned that word from this site! From Kiltdntiltd (I probably misspelled that) of course.

        • Sarah

          Ah, yes. Our resident human compendium of tailoring terms!

  • Mothra

    That poor child is the most singularly unattractive creature in recent history. And it isn’t because she dresses terribly, or because she’s crass, it is because she never seems to have her mouth closed. That is so not a good look. She used to be so sweet looking and she has a beautiful, clear voice, and now she’s just a trainwreck of a hot mess–that’s like double awful. And you people know how I feel about onsies. The child needs an intervention. Yet another way to monetize this whole bitter kittens thing. We could have a “facility,” where stars can learn about the history of couture and fashion.

    • bitchybitchybitchy

      We could deploy Bitter Kittens as fashion mentors to young celebs. I look at Miley Cyrus as a young woman who became famous as a very carefully-crafted Disney Family Channel star who eventually chafed against her squeaky-clean image. I can understand her wanting to try on different fashion and music styles, and to let loose with the occasional four letter word, but she seems to be on the fast train to wackyville more often than not.

      • sk8tfan

        I also personally believe (based on no evidence at all) drugs play a big part in her deterioration. Such a talented young woman, such a disaster unfolding so publicly. Hope she gets a grip before they find her face down in a gutter somewhere.

        • Anna

          Well she certainly espouses drug use and culture in her music, videos, and concerts. I don’t think it’s just a bong hit here and there either. What I think is especially terrible is that her parents seem to be loving all of the fame Miley is getting based solely on antics and bad behavior. All of that overshadows the fact that Miley can really sing and probably has a good heart. I don’t know, I just feel so icky when I see her, but I also want to hug her too.

          • KinoEye

            Isn’t that always the way with most child stars? The ones who don’t turn out like, say, Ron Howard, or fade into obscurity (the actor who played Danny in The Shining is now a biology teacher) usually crash and burn. Hard. And it seems the parents always have a big hand in it. One of the best classes I ever took in college was called Stardom (by the way, TLo, I want to track that professor down and tell her to use “Be Me or Do Me” as a textbook if she ever teaches that class again), and we did a whole unit on child stars. Gary Coleman was broke by the time he turned 18 because his parents had taken all his money. Mr. and Mrs. Achy Breaky Heart probably aren’t too different.

          • Anna

            That’s true – the parents view their children as objects they can use to cash in. They aren’t human beings anymore, they’re money and fame makers. I don’t think every Hollywood parent is that way, but most probably are. I also wonder how often child stars are sexually exploited behind the scenes as well. I feel like that probably goes on a lot more than is talked about.

          • bitchybitchybitchy

            I would hope that someone with some influence can get through to Miley Cyrus and her family that the bad behavior and antics are not going to be good for her in the long term. Does the name Lindsay Lohan ring a rather sad bell with anyone else?

    • Bitter Kitten Bootcamp, brought to you by the T.Lo Institute for Dressing Good.

      • decormaven

        Oh, I would buy this t-shirt! And it wouldn’t be hardcore bootcamp – it would be glamping, with Tim Gunn wearing his adorable Royal Canadian Mountie outfit.

    • Let it out

      Most unattractive? Even as hyperbole that’s awfully harsh.

  • jbontrager78

    What is that thing visible under her arm?

    • Thomas

      Pretty sure it’s a tat.

    • ShaoLinKitten

      A tattoo of a dreamcatcher. I am sad for myself that I know this.

      • conniemd

        Leave it to Miley to incorporate an American Indian symbol into a tat under her arm. Very disrespectful. There is nothing said about knowing what a dreamcatcher is. You can buy them all over the place in Arizona as tourist souvenirs. They also can be serious and beautiful works of art and given as symbolic caring gifts.

        • ShaoLinKitten

          I’m not sad that I know what a dreamcatcher is…a good friend of mine makes them for a living, among other things. I’m sad that I know what the tat under Miley Cyrus’s arm is. Or maybe it speaks to how many times I’ve seen her naked. Either way.

        • save_the_hobbit

          There’s nothing wrong with getting a tattoo of a dream catcher as long as you understand what it actually is.

          • enuma

            But in Miley’s case, I suspect the only thing she understands is that someone else’s culture can be appropriated into a cool looking accessory.

      • ElaineMarie34

        I thought for a second it was a Spirograph tattoo. Which woulda been kind of cool.

        • I’ve seen some fantastic Spirograph tattoos on Pinterest – they can be gorgeous.

      • MissusBee

        Wait. Miley is catching our dreams under her armpit? Explains so much.

  • smh4748

    I’ve always said that far too few tattoos pay homage to classic children’s toys, but here’s Miley, giving the Spirograph the ol’ underarm place of honor.

    I don’t even want to know where she’s got the Etch-A-Sketch.

    • Paigealicious

      LOL. I believe it’s a dream catcher.

      • tired_mommy

        Oh–I was thinking Spyrograph…

        • Laura Abrahamsen

          That was my first impression too.

  • Thomas

    Well, at least she’s not in any legal trouble, yet…

  • nowlo

    There are certain looks that young people just can’t pull off. This is more suitable for a brassy lady of a certain age who likes to belt out showtunes at odd moments and is too old and drunk to care whether her shoes go with her jumpsuit.

    • bitchybitchybitchy

      I’m seeing the soldier who hallucinated himself as Ethel Merman in “Airplane” wearing this and belting out “Everything’s coming up Roses”. yes, I’m on an Airplane theme today.

      • AthenaJ

        EVERY DAY should be an Airplane day!
        Now, back to my drinking problem… **splash**

        • MoHub

          And don’t call me Shirley!

          • bitchybitchybitchy

            You try draggin Walton and Frazier up the court!

      • Alloy Jane

        Don’t feel bad, I’ve had the Men in Tights song in my head for at least a week now. We’re butch!

        • bitchybitchybitchy

          Among my other BK-TLo fantasies is a BK film festival at which we show our dearest favorite flicks!

    • Stancey

      I sort of imagine Emma Thompson in this with an oversized cardigan and a glass of champagne.

      • Heather

        Indeed, Emma could rock this.

      • bitchybitchybitchy

        And sitting on a giant ball while sipping champers!

  • Betsy

    That print would make a cute dress.

  • kbshee

    She has bypassed showing off the purse on an awkward place of her arm to showing off the bracelet so we all know SHE WEARS CHANEL!

    • Vegas Girl

      I could be wrong, but it seems to me she had been showing off Chanel jewelry for a long time. I think this, because I don’t like her at all every picture I see of her gives met he sads that she had Chanel jewelry and I don’t 🙁

    • Her arm is stretched out like that because one of her handlers is dragging a clueless drunk person around (miley). I had to examine the pictures for a minute to realize that, because I also thought she was doing the Taylor: showing off her goods awkwardly.

  • Glam Dixie

    Smacked ass pretty much sums it up.

  • hughman

    “I like to kick! Stretch! And kick! I’m fifty! Fifty years old, ladies and gentlemen, fifty years old!”

    • RescueMe23

      I’m fifty! Loved that bit!

    • ShaoLinKitten

      Sally O’Malley for the win!

  • BlairBear

    I’m pretty sure that would be hideous on anybody

    • Thomas

      Jane Fonda might be able to make it work lol But it might be too matronly for her too.

      • BlairBear

        I think the giant logos would be tacky on anyone and I think the elephant pants and blousy shapeless upper would make anyone look frumpy

      • bitchybitchybitchy

        Jane would take the print and wear it as a top OR bottom-maybe a halter top with a black pencil skirt or cigarette pants, thereby avoiding the matronly rap.

        • demidaemon

          So, basically it needs o be cut in half with the bottom half burnt in an incinerator?

  • marlie

    Correction, uncles: Those shoes are hideously wrong. Period. Otherwise, yes, smacked ass.


    Stalked by another jammy jumpy nooo!

  • Danielle

    Of course.

  • FibonacciSequins

    The expression on the guy in the first photo sums up my feelings about this pretty well.

  • Ashleigh

    This is full on Florida retired old lady being escorted to the crazy farm!

    • SRQkitten

      Yes, as someone who’s seen more than enough of the crazy ol’ ladies in the sunshine state, this totally does it. Not something that should be worn by anyone under 70.

  • mjmiller77

    flabbergasted. even for her. omg

  • bitchybitchybitchy

    This is actually from Uncle Karl’s “Blanche Deveraux” senior resort collection.

  • Nika E

    just because you throw on some expensive ass Chanel (and I’m sure miss Coco is rolling over in her grave) does not mean instant class.

    • bitchybitchybitchy

      Sometime I fantasize about Coco’s ghost haunting Karl Lagerfeld.

      • Nika E

        Yes! He’s totally taking the chic and class out of the line and is making it cheap and tacky. Chanel, cheap and tacky should never be in the same sentence.

        • bitchybitchybitchy

          No, Chanel should never, ever be in the same sentence as cheap and tacky. Sigh.

      • MoHub

        Designer dybbuk.

        • bitchybitchybitchy


    • AthenaJ


  • another_laura

    I swear, I saw this woman yelling and screaming at my bus stop this morning. But she was wearing bright red lipstick.

    • MoHub

      I’m over 60 and wouldn’t be caught dead in this. Ever.

  • spirit52

    Maybe she was still on pain meds?!

  • nannypoo

    On the bright side, it looks like she has a hot handler.

  • teensmom99

    I don’t know what’s wrong with me today and I’m no Miley fan and yet I think there’s something cute about this and I like the shoes. I won’t go so far as to like the flower but there’s a certain something zippy about this. Of course, a Chanel should be more than cute and zippy and it looks like the pattern doesn’t match at the seams which is inexcusable when you are just flaunting your logo for thousands of bucks but still I think Miley looks cute. Or maybe i just miss my teen daughter while she’s at camp.

  • TwiddlyStun

    It looks like she has one handler dragging her by the hand, and two more providing her with a little fence, so I scrolled down expecting teeter heels, not those schlubby excuses for footwear. I guess her balance is more likely pharmaceutically altered. I kind of wondering if her odd gaze is focused on a rainbow unicorn.

  • cocohall

    Where do I line up for the Early Bird Special? Is it Pot Roast Tuesday? Let’s get this show moving – I ‘ve got to catch the Bingo Bus at 7!

  • deech_sea

    The flower and boots are awful, but the unforgivable aspect is the makeup. Otherwise, she would look right at home in a John Waters movie.

    • MoHub

      John Waters has more class than that. He’d only put that makeup on a guy.

      • demidaemon

        And that guy would be able to work the shit out of it, unlike Miss Cyrus.

  • Janet B

    The jumpsuit is overwhelming her.
    The fabric is horrible along with the shoes.

    eta: maybe the fabric is okay, but not for Miley

  • RescueMe23

    She’s a hot mess!

  • MilaXX

    This jumpsuit could have been cute on a youngling in the 15 – 18 year old demographic. Give them a cute pair of ballet flats or low top chucks and it works. On Miley it’s just a hot mess. She wearing the wrong shoes, a bracelet that doesn’t go and plastic flowers from Walmart. Go home Miley, you’re drunk.

  • GemFemme

    I don’t mind pantsuits if they’re sleek and sexy, but this is so shapeless and hideously ugly. The Hobby Lobby plastic flowers in the hair, nasty shoes and crappy non-makeup are just the icing on top of a really heinous, unappetizing cake.

  • KT

    Haha the very first thing I thought in reaction to these pictures was, “still a smacked ass.” Glad we arrived at the same conclusion!

  • Annistella

    Resounding proof that money cannot buy class.

    • DuBey2

      But it CAN buy Crass.

  • CKMia

    That outfit makes *perfect* sense if you’re high as a kite.

  • evave2

    Gosh, the shoes ruined it for me too. But I like the orchid in her hair. (I have been given the website to find them on the web and will be ordering them, well the fake them anyway. I can’t afford to wear REAL orchids in my hair.)

  • Imasewsure

    We better put this one on Heidi and see if it’s actually workable or not. Miley is leading us to believe that it belongs in the trash but it’s hard to tell since she has uglified it to the tacky extreme!! Probably still ugly since I assumed it was thrift store

  • Judy_J

    That whole outfit screams Goodwill bargain bin.

  • ShaoLinKitten

    Picture Friedo Pinto wearing it with a lovely sandal in a color (maybe draw out the fuchsia or mustard?) and tasteful accessories, with her perfect head instead of… this one’s. It could work. Just not on Miss Thang here.

  • madscntst

    This could be my grandma being led away from the bar after a particularly wild Friday night…

  • dash1211

    She makes anything she wears just tacky.

  • d4divine

    Trailer trash Little Edie.

  • Guest

    Yeah, is it just me, or are those pupils hella dilated?

  • Paula Pertile

    I’m concerned about all the cheap knock-offs of this loud print pajama pant-suit thing that are no doubt already being sweat-shopped up for discerning Target and Walmart customers.

  • kipper

    It’s her. Nan Kempner would have ROCKED this ……

    • Grace C.

      +1 for a Nan Kempner nod. One of my childhood society idols.

  • CatLady

    As I was looking at the top of the first picture, I didn’t think her outfit could get any worse. Then I scrolled down and saw the pantsuit. Then, hideous shoes. I think I need a drink now. D:

  • thesevenendless

    Well at least her body is covered….

  • snarkykitten

    She looks like a freaky Kewpie doll

  • Orange Girl

    Holy shit, does she look psychotic in that second pic. Get out of the way, everyone.

  • quiltrx

    First thoughts…1, what are her lips doing, 2, why does she need so many people to point her a direction, 3, did she rip the armhole or is it just that awful?

  • housefulofboys

    I think one of the construction issues in this jumpsuit vs what Heidi wore a couple of days ago, is that this one has no waist. Heidi (wisely) chose a jumper that gave her a little shape; that, and the fact that she is of amazonian-proportions and can get away with wearing garments that mere mortals should not attempt. Miley, unfortunately, is attracted by the latest shiny object – ooh, jumpsuit! – and fails to recognize that it’s not made for her in any way, and then proceeds to style it with those hideous shoes and a yellow flower in her hair. Heidi, in contrast, had california-breezy hair, some gold chains and flat slides, all appropriate for a jumpsuit. As someone mentioned below, I suspect that mind-altering substances may have had a hand in putting Miley’s outfit together.

  • redhead with tattoos

    So can we assume she’s done with Ratchet and is now on the Wayne Coyne Tripping LSD At Coachella train for the forseeable future? (Or summer at least?)

  • Fast forward 50 years …she can wear exactly the same look…flower and all at her senior citizen home in Coral Gables! HIDEOUS!

    • Gatto Nero

      I was thinking the same thing. The baggy fit and hideous print say retirement home.

  • formerlyAnon

    She’s got that look. The one that’s 8 months or less to hospital admission for “exhaustion.”

    I’d love to be wrong.

  • gitchygitchymama

    wearing one dream catcher ink’d on one’s lat is trending.

  • LambeeBaby

    Oooo look. How sweet! Julianna Hough did her eyebrows!

  • BrianaJC

    I think the jumpsuit COULD be salvaged, but why you would even want to try, I don’t know.

  • Innuendo

    Not one piece of this outfit works.

  • decormaven

    Jumpsuit and bangle both look thrift shop, and the garish flower topknot completes the look. The boots were left over from whatever outfit she had on prior to this. With the prominent placement of the logo on the bangle on the arm, is her PR team now resorting to trotting her out for paid product promo? If so, please wait til she is more sober and presentable. I’m with formerlyAnon; she’s headed for timeout due to “exhaustion.”

  • Gatto Nero

    … Plus, this is Chanel??

    • MoHub

      Only in name.

  • ChaquitaPhilly

    Hard to believe that she chose to look so utterly bad!

  • carnush

    I know it’s ugly, but at least it’s colorful and her privates are covered. It’s a wackly-happy outfit, which makes me smile.

  • Lilah

    Clown suit.

  • flamingo1092

    Her mouth is always open in every photo I see of her. What a mouth breather.

  • Therese Bohn

    At least she’s covered up. That hair flower would look great…on a toddler.

  • NMMagpie

    In this overly-clothed state, I almost did not recognize her.

  • tetisheri

    At least her tongue is in her mouth.

  • KinoEye

    The dream catcher tattoo on her rib cage bothers me more than it has any right to. Is she saving bad spirits in her ribs for later?

  • AthenaJ

    That jumpsuit is a crime against fashion. I have a feeling she and Uncle Karl are doing the same drugs.

  • Oh god, that looks like the upholstery pattern on my grandma’s old couch! You sure that’s Chanel? Kaiser Karl wouldn’t have designed that with his eyes closed!

  • Melissa

    She looks like a Hawaiin nightmare.

  • StrandedFashionista

    And the fact that the picture makes her SUPER washed out looking doesn’t help anything.

  • Ann VerWiebe

    I used to own pajamas just like that jumpsuit. In the ’70s. When I was 8.

  • annmartina

    Is she needing to be led?

  • Let it out

    This doesn’t work. But I think she (or her handlers) generally have a very good sense of her proportions. Trashy, yes, but I don’t get the hate.

  • JynxTheCat

    wow. She looks TahWEAKED! She seems like nothing is anything but derived from someone els.e She is more like a fan girl than her own person.

  • poggi

    My kid occasionally looks like this because she wants to wear her new rain boots with tulle skirt and a pokemon t-shirt. She is 8. Sometimes I let her, but even then I have the decency to be embarrassed.

  • Aliu

    She looks like she got dressed out a trashcan of discarded Chanel stuff… It’s like the Chanel version of Rag Day.

  • Clash D

    Rodeo Clown.

  • Tami from Seattle

    The poster child of Privilege.

  • livesarah

    Yeah…. We weren’t missing anything, clearly. Please feel free to ignore her a bit longer.

  • demidaemon

    Pretty much what TLo said. Ugly jumpsuit + ugly shoes + dumb flower = smacked ass.

  • Mr. J.

    Miley is in Would She Just Go Away? hall of fame. Next to Madonna.

  • Alloy Jane

    This outfit looks like it should’ve been highlighted in Weird Al’s “Happy” parody called “Tacky.”

  • Gorengirl

    Im just glad she covered her body. Ive seen enough of her nakedness and her tongue to last 2 lifetimes…..

  • Christin Pardy-Nosenchuk

    Sweet table flipping Jesus that is fug.

  • chof1

    She’s working on her Frida Kahlo look.

  • Shaeyjosan

    Clown Onesie. Is this the year of the Onesie? This will make waiting in line for the bathroom at concerts and sporting events twice as long if this crap is back in style.