Johnny Depp for Interview Magazine

Posted on April 04, 2014

Professional elderly gay wind chime gives these kids with their “reality TV” nonsense the what-for. Then he sucks in his cheeks and takes us all to 1995 once again.


Johnny Depp covers the May 2014 issue of Interview magazine photographed by Bruce Weber and styled by Karl Templer.


On reality TV: “People get famous now for I-don’t-know-what. People have reality shows because they’re a Hollywood socialite, and these things become very successful and they generate a shitload of money for the company. And it’s multiplying, to where you’re literally looking into your next door neighbor’s bathroom with reckless abandon. It is like watching a fire. You can’t take your eyes off of it.”

On getting dressed: “I love the idea of changing my look. I think one owes it to the audience, to go out there and give them something different each time, so as not to bore them to death. And I always felt that if you’re not trying something different each time out of the gate, you’re being safe, and you don’t ever want to find that place of safety. I like that, each time, before I even go in front of the cameras, the studio’s reaction will be fear.”


Is he kidding us with that? He’s barely changed his look in 20 years. And his rant about reality TV sounds like he just traveled here from the year 2002.





And these pictures literally could have been taken at any point in the past 20 years. You’d just need to (ever so slightly) age him digitally to make him 2014 appropriate. And probably remove Winona Ryder from the background.  Also: you get a puppy OR a teddy bear for your editorial. Both at the same time are twee as fuck.



[Photo Credit: Bruce Weber for Interview Magazine]

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  • Jacob Bowen

    Something about the teddy bear reads a little creepy to me…like “he took the teddy bear from your child’s bedroom” creepy

    • @Biting Panda


    • Let it out

      Yeah, I got that too, just…ew. Especially unfortunate in light of his engagement to someone 23 years his junior (though she is certainly not a child).

    • muzan-e

      Maybe from your child’s bedroom. Since he’s been literally looking into those, lately.

  • Kewtwo

    The On Getting Dressed quote refers to screen roles, not personal style. Just sayin’.

    • elirt

      I don’t read that at all from the quote – sounds like he’s referring to his personal style and getting dressed for the red carpet.

    • anneland

      He is definitely talking about changing his look for movie roles, not life.

    • colleenjanel

      So after reading the full text, I think you’re right that he’s referring to screen roles. But I don’t get how changing his look for movie roles is a novel concept? Of course different characters are going to have different looks. If Willy Wonka looked like Jack Sparrow, it would be a problem.

      • Kewtwo

        You are absolutely correct, it is not novel. Sounds like he just enjoys the process and testing the boundaries.

      • deelup

        I think it’s more about taking on all these different roles. Some people just play the same thing over and over again. George Clooney, even in a Batman costume, was still George Clooney just wearing a mask.

        • AnaRoW

          Johnny hasn’t taken on a “different” role in a decade. He’s played so many weird characters that they’re all starting to run together. The only thing that changes is the makeup. I swear he got confused several times during Alice where he thought he was still Jack Sparrow.

          I’m not opposed to actors playing the same over and over again. James Stewart was ALWAYS James Stewart. The same’s true for Cary Grant, Clark Gable, etc. and, as you said, George Clooney (aside from O Brother Where Art Thou?) Johnny, however, is in a rut.

          • FrigidDiva

            Totally agree. I can’t believe I sat through Lone Ranger, but his Tonto character just felt like a slightly more drunk version of Jack Sparrow. I really don’t feel like what he does for his characters is all that innovative anymore.

  • Glam Dixie

    I’m not getting this editorial at all. What the hell?

    • Shawn EH

      It’s very nineties.

      • Trent

        Nineties?! I bought those same shoes from Trash & Vaudeville on St. Mark’s Place in 1985. Yes, I’m Gramps McGee. Sigh…

        • Shawn EH

          Boston 90s, not New York 90s then.

  • @Biting Panda

    Not “timeless” so much as “stagnant”.

    • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

      I have to remember this statement. Well said.

    • Carleenml


    • Fuchsiaforever

      Ouch but true

  • mjude

    I want the shoes

  • Griffinqueen

    TLO, are you suggesting that statue of Pan looks like Winona Ryder? 😉

  • International Model

    No Johnny Depp spread will ever beat him with the long hair, fast food worker shirt, ironing board with a huge tray of toast he made with the iron.

    That’s the Johnny Depp I want to explain to the children of the future.

  • formerlyAnon

    Well, he DID spend a lot of time living in France, maybe they didn’t watch reality t.v.?

    Honestly, my soft spot for this guy continues. He’s cute. Not as cute as he once was, and quite possibly not as cute as he thinks he is, but still. Despite the apparent inability to latch onto a really great trademark look or hide his ongoing midlife crisis.

    • conniemd

      This truly. I have the same soft spot.

    • anneland

      Also, I might be wrong and I haven’t seen every movie of his…. but he is always genius. He’s an amazing actor, so, what the hell, dress however you want, Johnny. You don’t have to rely on photo shoots and red carpets. Some do.

      • Alicia

        Was the Lone Ranger one of the ones you didn’t see?

    • not_Bridget

      After earning his millions playing the pirate, I want him to take a role that will knock everybody out. Once again. To remind us just how good he can be…..

      • DinnerIsServed1972

        I feel the same way about Tim Burton, too. Hey, guys! Remember when you did that awesome movie called “Ed Wood?”

  • lexilexi

    I still would choose him over Becks.

    • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

      If those 2 were my only choice, I’d opt for celibacy.

  • BobStPaul

    Cute dog.

  • Eleanorjane

    Twee as fuck. Nailed it as usual, guys!

  • Kerry McCombs

    I think he means change his look ONSCREEN, not off.

    • colleenjanel

      Even if that were the case (and I’m not so sure), he’s been playing the same character with the same look for the past DECADE.

      • Kewtwo

        Same look in Burton films? OK.
        Same look in all films? No.
        Finding Neverland Secret Window The Libertine Once Upon a Time in Mexico Public Enemies Pirates.

        • not_Bridget

          He knocked me out in Finding Wonderland because he played such a non-knock out. Such a gentle, repressed role–reminding us of his versatility.

        • Gatto Nero

          And in “Before Night Falls” he played two very different small roles that blew me away.
          (Also “Sweeney Todd.”)

      • alliekat9090

        I don’t think there is an actor working who looks & behaves so vastly different from role to role. I would say your description better fits DeNiro.

        • colleenjanel

          I was referring to Pirates. Been playing the same character with the same look for a decade. And another in the works. Where’s the new look?

        • sk8tfan

          Oh I don’t know-Pirates, Lone Ranger, Dark Shadows, Alice-the costuming was different but to me they were all the same basic character. Last thing I remember seeing him act original in was Finding Neverland.

    • Gatto Nero

      I wondered about that, too, since he talks about going in front of the cameras and scaring the studios. He does have a lot of influence on the costume design for his roles (e.g., Keith Richards drag for “Pirates,” the crow headdress for Tonto).

    • TigerLaverada

      Yeah, I think so, too. Otherwise, why mention frightening the studio suits? They don’t care what he wears on his own time.

  • Jennifer L.

    My first thought with that faux-deep/sweet expression was “Ew…wait… Nope, still ew.”

  • Saturnine

    The picture of him reading to the dog with the freaky satyr in the background is priceless. I like to imagine it’s part of his daily routine.

  • Danielle

    Can we have more pictures of the puppy instead?

    • decormaven

      Or the teddy bear.

    • Sandye Shaw Taylor

      puppy is Uggie, from ‘The Artist’

    • Alicia

      In the words of Dory Previn “The dog takes a good picture”.

  • crash1212

    Bummed the shoes don’t get identified. Love them.

    • Shawn EH

      They’re creepers. Good ones.

    • MartyBellerMask

      They probably came from his own closet.

    • MilaXX

      Agree with Shawn. They look like creepers

  • kim bunchalastnames

    ““I love the idea of changing my look. I think one owes it to the audience, to go out there and give them something different each time” … my irony meter just exploded.

  • MilaXX

    When did he become so full of himself? He needs to take his mid life crisis somewhere and have several seats.

    • FrigidDiva

      I was listening to a snippet of an interview from one of the morning shows on my way to work this morning and I could hardly understand a word her said, he’s really affected this crazy accent. He was also mumbling what sounded like a string of Dylan lyrics–they made no sense. He’s really trying hard to be Johnny Dep and it just comes across as desperate.

      • MilaXX

        or Johnny Depp by way of Hunter S Thompson. Either way it comes across as inauthentic

        • FrigidDiva

          Inauthentic and douchey as hell.

  • Ashleigh


    • stubbornthoughts

      We should be friends.

  •!/Space_Kitty Space Kitty

    Aw. I remember those cheekbones.

  • stubbornthoughts

    All this Johnny hate! More for me. My mind is going to wonderful places right now. Mind the drool puddles.

  • nannypoo

    Wait – he dresses this way on purpose?

  • Gatto Nero

    Still, he looks pretty good here (not overly photoshopped), if a little haunted.

  • greymain

    wtf guys…he is what he is gwt the f- over it. Gay windchime or not.

  • quiltrx

    And seriously, the name at the bottom of that hideous portrait needs to be changed from “Dorian Gray” to “Johnny Depp”.

  • KayEmWhy

    Still sexy sexy to me. 😛

  • Imasewsure

    Sorry but the one with the dog is totally working for me. I don’t mind some cliches. I think it’s cute and funny and I dig the shoes

  • KT

    Hahaha. Great assessment. And YES to his nickname — I can’t get enough. Thank you, TLo!

  • marlie

    I really hate the teddy bear. And the rest does nothing for me. This guydatorial was a missed opportunity to do something OTHER THAN the elderly gay windchime look.

  • clatie


  • GorgeousThings

    Well, maybe not from 2002, but from France.

  • Jackie4g

    Such a beautiful man.

  • lbl

    It’s like they’re asking for a cradle robber joke.

  • Sadie-Ann

    I think these pictures actually are from years ago. He hasn’t looked this unadorned in forever.

  • Cheryl

    Oh I’m so glad people are turning on Johnny, so those of us that have loved him forever can have him back in our weirdo/freak club.

    Btw, it’s a known fact that Jack Russells love Thelonious.

  • Corsetmaker

    Reality TV- he’s not been living in the US remember. And although there will be reality TV in France (such as Big Brother) I don’t think it will be on the scale of the UK let alone the US. So he probably does seem to have come from 2002 in that sense.

  • MannahattaMamma

    Is that his fiancee’s teddy bear?

    • pookiesmom

      OH BURN

  • FloridaFashionFan

    I love the credit for Calvin Klein but none for the hot as Hell shoes.

  • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

    Man, does he look stupid.

  • Gaby

    Ugh I am so done with him and his mid-life crisis.

  • KinoEye

    I think he’s overestimating the studio’s reaction to his fashion choices: Fear? Really, does anyone here feel fear when we see him featured? If anything, it’s mild disgust mixed with nostalgia for the memory of a sex symbol who’s in the middle of the most laughably stereotypical mid-life crisis ever.

  • msdamselfly

    Is that Uggy?

  • andi56

    Is the teddy some sort of Aloysius reference from “Brideshead Revisited”? He was Lord Sebastian Flyte’s teddy bear. Lord Sebastian came a cropper and ended very sadly.

  • Kent Roby

    Interview….with a Vampire?