David Beckham for H&M Spring/Summer 2014 Swimwear Collection

Posted on April 04, 2014

David Beckham for H&M Spring/Summer 2014 Swimwear photographed by Glen Luchford.

 

 

 

 

[Photo Credit: Glen Luchford for H&M, hm.com]

    • schadenfreudelicious

      Wow, ok…i really need to put my glasses on before i peruse…cause those shots of the white trunks/undies with the string?…nevermind…

      • Ginger

        AHHHH HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *breathe* HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA *snort*

      • Vee

        I thought the same thing!

      • SewingSiren

        No, not just you. Who sever styled the shots was having a bit of fun.

        • tintashoopa

          I can’t imagine that that was an accident!

      • Sam Smith

        Totally saw the same thing.

      • http://redheadedwolf.wordpress.com/ Laura Renee

        What am I missing??

        • schadenfreudelicious

          Take a look at the photo of the white swim trunks…does the shape of the lace resemble anything?…

          • http://redheadedwolf.wordpress.com/ Laura Renee

            …OH. ::grins:: I kept looking at the modeling shot, not the ones of them lying flat. Also spent a minute going “WTF WHAT LACE” before I realized you meant “laces.” (Tips for anyone else who is also terribly dense).

            • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

              I’m really, really dense….. could you guys let me know what I’m supposed to be seeing?

            • schadenfreudelicious

              On the flat shot of the first pair of white swim trunks (not on Becks)..the black string tie makes a rather “sausage Friday” looking shape…

            • Jacob Bowen

              Upside down, yes…we are in full sausage Friday mode to catch this.

            • schadenfreudelicious

              hmmm…i was thinking more right side up ;)

            • Anna

              Really, really dense here too. Took me awhile to get it.

            • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

              Bear with me guys, I haven’t had my morning coffee yet. What am I supposed to see? I’m really not getting it.

              ETA: Caffeine has kicked in. So it’s an erect, somewhat deformed looking penis I’m suppose to see, right?

            • schadenfreudelicious

              Ha, yes i likely should have used the plural, i was of course not thinking lace in our ususal context…I was distracted ;)

          • kategs

            naughty naughty!! :P

      • Cheryl

        Yep, I saw that too. I can’t believe that whoever styled the shot, and whoever was the editor missed that. It was the first thing I saw!

      • Griffinqueen

        Ha! I really thought it was a graphic at first :)

    • GorgeousThings

      What the hell did they do to his face? He looks like a statue in Mme. Tussaud’s

      • ScarlettHarlot

        Face? He has a face? My gaze rarely makes it north of his neck.

    • Anna

      Ovaries: “Stop! CANNOT take anymore combustion.”

      Mind & rest of body: “I don’t care. I love it.”

    • ScarlettHarlot

      Good gracious hallelujah and thank you, Uncles! This is just the palate cleanser needed after that Bloom-ness. I want to pull those draw strings!

      • ScarlettHarlot

        With my mouth.

    • Beth Swartz

      All hail sausage Friday!

    • SayWhaaatNow

      Oh there’s swimwear in this?

    • Bebe

      He’s not very happy about going swimming.

      • Glam Dixie

        I thought maybe the kids were running at the pool. He looks very stern.

        • http://www.momforless.com/ Crystal

          I am ok with stern, in the right context. :)

      • anonylind

        I’ll cheer him up

    • Jessica Freeman

      Standing Ovulation. Bravo my dear man.

      (anyone else getting a three ring binder effect from the background? i mean, those of you even looking past Becks?)

      • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

        I’m getting more of a spiral bound notebook effect (it’s easy for me to look past Becks). : )

      • Danielle

        *adding standing ovulation to my list of phrases to work in to daily conversation*

    • http://redheadedwolf.wordpress.com/ Laura Renee

      Is that a tattoo of Jesus undressing on his ribs? I mean, who doesn’t want that?

      • alyce1213

        I thought it was Jesus doing yoga.

      • MsMajestyk

        I’m thinking he’s picking a splinter out of his foot.

    • @Biting Panda

      Mr. Serious Face is serious about being fucking HAWT!

    • jonnyf8

      Now that’s what I call an acceptable Sausage Friday post!

    • marlie

      I may be alone in this, but “almost-naked” Becks doesn’t do it for me. Now, put him in a suit, and I’m all over that.

      • Glam Dixie

        Not alone. I’m looking at the trunks though and wishing the shorter ones would make a comeback. Man thighs.

        • Allison Angier

          Absolutely, Glam Dixie! I am delighted with shorter mens swimwear. I never found board shorts (is that what they were called?) appealing.

        • jackiejormpjomp

          Those things have made a comeback all over college campuses. I can’t tell you how many frat guys I see walking around in short shorts.

      • Stacy C

        Agreed.. or when he’s holding his little girl.

    • Jackie4g

      I don’t understand covering up that gorgeousness with all that ink. All these people with tattoos are going to look very strange when they get older. Not Becks, probably, but the average Joe/Jane.

      • shirab

        I often think about that, especially when I see people who go for a lot of ink relatively early in life. What if their tastes evolve, as they likely will in terms of hairstyle, hem length, car preferences, cut of jeans, etc.? Also, I wonder if when Posh and Becks look at their kids, esp that oldest one who is modeling now, they are OK with the idea that they might choose all-over inking as well.

      • jilly_d

        I hear this all the time, but then I will see someone who is 70+ with a lot of ink, and my first thought is never “Oh, too bad about the tattoos falling; I bet they used to look great”. It’s always “Don’t fuck with that guy”. Which, to me, is a great reason to over-ink when you are young :) I would love to be the type of old lady that all the kids on the block are terrified of.

    • decormaven

      “How long do I have to stand here to collect my big paycheck?”

    • nannypoo

      There is something so crass about him modeling his own underwear line that it makes me laugh. He looks angry. And why is he covered with religious symbolism? Nope, not doing it for me.

    • lexilexi

      I stand alone. He does nothing for me, clothed or un.

      • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

        No, you don’t. I stand next to you.

    • Tobey

      To quote Gretchen from Bob’s Burgers, “Clean up, Aisle My Panties!”

    • Shawn EH

      Why do board shorts anger him so? Relax, Mr. Athlete.

    • Sonia Perez

      I am kind of sick of seeing HIM in his underwear. It was Hot for awhile, but not anymore. Maybe that’s just me.

      • colleenjanel

        Nope. Not just you.

    • Noah

      THANK YOU, UNCLES!

    • JR Labrador

      I can smell the Axe from here.

    • Danielle

      His face isn’t doing it for me here. He’s concentrating too hard on not moving.

      • gogobooty

        Blue Steel.

    • LilyVanessi

      It’s got to be a talent to get the exact same facial expression all the time. Of course, who’s really looking at his face!?

    • JauntyJohn

      Few can argue that the camera loves him.
      While I think we tend to stay away from body commentary here, when your brand is in large part based on “I am super hot” and you are selling swimwear after selling underwear, I think it can be part of the conversation. All that ink — which works on him — distracts from what a refreshingly natural build he has. At 38 (thanks Google!) man’s lookin’ good.

      And can I just say I am really happy with this shorter shorts length coming back. I’m all for the basketball peeps being comfortable in what essentially always looked like skirts to me, with all that fabric and a knee length to boot, this (old) new square cut, a little tailored and a little higher up the leg, is great.
      And by great I mean hot.

      • Jacob Bowen

        I LOVE those shorter shorts! I bought 3 pairs of them from a thrift store last year and bleached them (for sanity/style reasons) and then tye-dyed them.

      • somebody blonde

        Yeah, I can understand why most men won’t go for the speedos, but I really hope more of them go for the little shorts style. I like man thighs.

    • stubbornthoughts

      He’s working a solid Zoolander facial expression, which is laughable. But that body…HOLY SHIT. Victoria, you lucky wench. How does she get anything done? It’s no surprise they’re racking up so many kids.

    • Lily

      Is something missing here?

    • deelup

      He sort of looks like he’s constipated.

    • MilaXX

      Thanks uncles!

    • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

      You know something? Him and his wife are starting to creep me out.

    • kmk05

      Nothing is inspiring here: not his posing, not the swimwear, and not the setting. The soft focus thing also bugs.

    • DTLAFamilies

      Uncanny valley

    • Jacob Bowen

      *Crossing my fingers for Chris Evans next* (We he was shown in a tight workout shirt last night when I saw Cpt. America 2 I about collapsed)….thank you David, for giving me something else to stare at while in H&M, so I get distracted and am able to save my wallet.

    • Ashleigh

      B O R I N G
      Look at the camera! Smile! Something!
      Whatever

    • KT

      Brought to you by David Beckham’s constantly constipated face. Yogurt and coffee, dude — gets me every time.

    • http://urban-gypsy.com/ Tess Danesi

      OMG, that first pair of white briefs! I thought that the strings were a penis design at first and cannot unsee it. Beckham is always Beckham. The face, the bod. Sigh. As long as he refrains from speaking, we’re good.

      • Fuchsiaforever

        I can totally see the penis design too! Lol

      • ShaoLinKitten

        I thought they were a cat’s paw on the crotch.

    • KayEmWhy

      Same poses every single time. Boring collection on a good looking man.

    • Lisa M. (ReVoir) Kramp

      Tats aside, one of the best upper bodies mankind has ever seen. Dayum.

    • JaCory Deon

      I guess I’m in the minority on this one because I think he looks bad and these pics are amateurish. It’s time for H&M to get someone else imho.

    • NMMagpie

      Love the tats even though DB has never done anything for me. I can just imagine his shoots; he’s got to have so many yes-people in the background and Victoria constantly talking to the art director as to which are his best angles.

      I can see where that scowl might come from.

    • sienna elm

      Today I’m counting my stars that there’s a page on the Internet that is occasionally dedicated to showing nearly naked pics of Mr. Beckham and that I discovered this page. Sigh….

    • Mars Tokyo

      Gross, man!

    • Daktari100

      That body would look good in (or out of) any swimwear. But that has got to be the cheapest looking schlock H&M has ever produced, and that’s really saying something. Doesn’t mean I can’t stop looking at the ad, mind you.

    • PeggyOC

      Sometime ago he passed the “too much ink” level for me. I respect that it’s everyone’s personal choice, but it’s not to my taste. It’s getting in the way of looking at all that lovely other stuff. I’ll have to cross him off the list and let the rest of you have him. (Also, why photoshop his cheeks that severely if you’re going to leave his forehead full of “serious thought” wrinkles?)

    • The Versatile Chef

      I was going to say something about the shoot, but I’m laughing too hard at all of the comments below. This thread is comedy gold.

    • http://www.momforless.com/ Crystal

      Lord have mercy.

    • Nicole

      Meh.

    • formerlyAnon

      This underwear/swimwear model aspect of his career is more and more hilarious to me the longer it continues. Soon there will be people who don’t think of him as a celebrated football/soccer player at all. We really DO live in Bizarro World, sometimes.

    • judybrowni

      So, apparently this means we’ll be seeing men’s upper thighs again for the first time in decades.

      • in a pickle

        EXACTLY my thought. Please, please let it be true. It’s not even for eye candy; I just can’t stand anymore of the droopy drawer, below the knee monstrosities.

    • rebeemoon

      Advertizing FAIL. Because who’s going to look at the clothes?

    • elzatelzabelz

      H-O-T-T. Totally objectifying him and totally OK with that.

    • MzzPants

      I’ll be in my bunk.

    • ShaoLinKitten

      I showed this to my four year old son and I swear to god, he said, “DAYUM.” I can’t stop laughing.

    • Sofia

      David Beckham does nothing for me but the white speedo’s in the 2nd photo are nice.

    • altissima

      The product shot of the white shorts: I misinterpreted the black laces as a black outline of… A certain part of the male anatomy. Oh my!

    • http://www.dogsdotcom.blogspot.com/ Plink

      Wretched to look at.

    • Clash D

      Okay – so this man has officially stopped wearing clothes?
      Which is a pity because he looks damn good in a suit.

    • mcbishop

      Ugh…..that man absolutely radiates pretense. I can’t stand him, or his wife. They are like a movie with no comedy relief; dull and self-regarding.

    • Pepper Collins

      He kinda looks like my boyfriend in the top photo!

      • Daktari100

        Yeah, he kinda looks like my boyfriend too.

        • Fannie Wolston

          yeah, and he looks like my friends’ boyfriend who i made out with one time

    • demidaemon

      The white ones aren’t bad (on him or as swimwear) but I hate the drab colors on everything else (including on him).