T LOunge

Posted on March 21, 2014

 

Crimson Lounge, Hotel Sax Chicago

 

Since (sort of) Chicago is a stop on our second mini book tour a couple weeks from now, we figure we’d get ourselves in the mood, darlings. We’ll do L.A. and San Francisco T Lounges on the next couple of Fridays, just for the hell of it.

Once again, we’re closing out our week with little in the way of news. If you stopped at our book site and found it difficult to get on, that’s a problem we’re fixing on our end, as this entire week was nothing but technical difficulties from beginning to end, which is why we’re heading straight for the wine rack in a moment or two. We’ll have all the latest bugs worked out next week, but for now, we’re couch-bound.

And you?

    • Danielle

      Man, this is the perfect lounge to curl up in a chair and sip bourbon all night. Another negative this month, so it’s okay, kittens.

      • Sofia

        sorry to hear that. have a great weekend and try not to worry.

      • formerlyAnon

        Ah, damn. Soldier on.

      • decormaven

        Hang in there!

      • Sarah

        I had a negative this month, too. We’re not trying, but I was sort of hoping. I know it must be worse to be in your boat, but that moment when you see one little line instead of two is a bummer. Best wishes for the next round!

        • Danielle

          I spoke too soon, kittens! A second line appeared this morning!

          • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

            Congratulations!

          • formerlyAnon

            Excellent! Fingers crossed. Now: do the impossible: take great care of yourself and relax, simultaneously. ;-)

          • Sarah

            WOOT!!! Awesome, girl.

          • Lisa_Co

            Yay! Congrats:)

          • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

            I’ll hold your bourbon.

    • Isabel

      Got a positive end-of-year from work. Left work at 2 p.m. Went to an outdoor festival and toured a historic home. Bought some great handmade soap. It will rain tomorrow, so enjoying the sun today.

      • Pennymac

        That sounds divine!

      • decormaven

        Love handmade soap. Big weakness for me. Sounds like a great day!

    • DTLAFamilies

      If you haven’t read Lorenzo’s tweets on the Kim and Kanye Vogue cover, do it now. Such laughs. Much shade. Wow.

      • http://vispreeve.tumblr.com/ Den Milano

        Love it!

      • marlie

        I’m with him. What is the world coming to?!?!

        • Jacob Bowen

          Oh my gosh! I’m pretty sure I FAINTED when I saw the cover…and my best friend is in TOTALY defense mode, saying “Tom Cruise, Katie, and Suri were on the cover!” And I say, “They are ACTUAL CELEBRITIES, and KIM is the focal point, not even KANYE who is actually the real celebrity!” This is giving false validation where none is due. Ugh. Rant over.

          • rosie5215

            Weren’t they on the cover of Vanity Fair, not Vogue?

            • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

              The Vogue cover just happened days ago.

              ETA: In Anna Wintour’s Letter from the Editor she denies that Kanye begged (or maybe paid) her to put Kim on the cover and she attempts to justify her decision.

            • rosie5215

              I meant Suri & Co., not Kim & Kanye.

      • butterflysunita

        I’m completely confused. I thought Anna Wintour hated Kim Kardashian. Why would she do this?

        • formerlyAnon

          Plots within machinations, my imagination takes flight! It’s some kind of ransom paid against the revenge Kanye & the Kardashians have threatened for her plot to send Kim out in public, pregnant and upholstered like your grandmother’s porch furniture.

        • MilaXX

          My only personal theory is money and lots of it. I’m sure there was some kind of deal struck back when Kanye brought Kim to the Met Gala.

        • DTLAFamilies

          Magazine publishers are in serious trouble right now. Ad revenues are down, readership is down. KK is one of the few celebs who sells magazines, which is why she’s on so many covers. Vogue is supposed to be upscale but they’re having the same troubles as everyone else, so this is a pure desperation move to move newsstand copies. And it will work. But the cost is the long-term credibility of the brand.

          • demidaemon

            Anna Wintour is defending her choice as saying she was not forced or begged by Kanye to do it. While your point makes sense, I still don’t think it’s this kosher. Anna, I call bullshit on your defense, and I know there was some behind the scenes machinations going on. Also, having seen the cover, I have this response: LAME. If KK is goint to be on the cover, put her in some actual fashion and not some lame Lanvin that basically looks like a wedding dress. LAME ASS PANDERING.

            • formerlyAnon

              Lame Ass Pandering would be good on a bumper sticker.

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              Or Lame Ass Pandaing, with a donkey and a panda wearing lamé dresses.

            • formerlyAnon

              Have you considered a side business? That’s pretty damn briliant – not just visual puns but layers of ‘em!

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              It’d be a good tshirt.

            • Alloy Jane

              I prefer my pandas in purple mageweave…

            • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

              Or the name of a band that does glitchy idm covers of Tammy Wynette songs.

            • formerlyAnon

              OH NO. I just realized why it trips so flowingly off my tongue – it scans like the band Poi Dog Pondering (a favorite of mine in their early, Austin, years.) Maybe it needs a 4th syllable? But I’m not up to revisions now.

            • SierraDelta

              THIS!

            • Sarah

              She said some crap about how Kim and Kanye are dictating fashion right now, and that’s been the magazine’s focus the whole time – putting fashion trendsetters on the cover. So, yeah, I guess we’re supposed to believe that Kimye are fashion icons of some kind, but I’m not buying it. I have heard more girls say stuff like “Well, it’s cute, but I don’t want to look like a Kardashian, so I’m not getting it.”

            • demidaemon

              Cute is a stretch for me. Anna Wintour, I need some boots for dealing with this much bullshit.

            • Sarah

              I’ve got a friend who likes animal print, but she has to constantly rein in the urge to be tacky with it.

            • demidaemon

              Well, at least she’s trying!

            • Alloy Jane

              You might try some waders. I hear those are all the rage for trudging through steaming bovine fecal matter. And now that they’re fashionable, you can even get them in zebra print. No more boring river green!

            • demidaemon

              HA! Something I would have preferred on the cover. How ironic!

            • marlie

              If by “dictating fashion” they mean “showing people what NOT to wear and how NOT to dress,” then sure. Otherwise, I call bullsh!t.

          • bitchybitchybitchy

            i foresee a Miley Cyrus cover and a lame-ass article about how “empowering” twerking is….

          • BayTampaBay

            The reason Vogue is having trouble is because Anna Wintour has ran the magazine into the ground by taking the focus off FASHION and putting on life-style culture! The only reason I still subscribe to Vogue is to make sure I get the September issue which is still dedicated to fashion. Elle is starting to show signs of the same disease.

            Harper’s Bazaar is a much better fashion magazine for people who love fasion.

        • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

          You should read the Fuggirls piece on it today. They make it all make sense. Unpalatable, but sense.

      • A Shiny O’Connor

        Mega snaps to our fabulous gay uncle. ‘Shade – The Lorenz-ical’.

      • decormaven

        Those tweets are classic, in the very best sense of the word. Thank you, dear uncles, for telling it like it is.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QFW22QV426LUOEPGASPZJWJMDE MishaFoomin

      Where is spring?? It snowed yesterday. It is snowing today. It is supposed to snow tomorrow. There are rumors of a snowstorm for next week. Does Mother Nature know how much dog poop I have to pick in my back yard?!

      • SouthernGirlRena

        So sorry Misha. It was 70 and sunny here and the bradford pears are blooming all over town. It seems spring is sneaking in this year so hopefully it will make its way to you soon.

      • DeTrop

        I finally got around to picking up poop last week and this week. Now that most of the snow is melted she’s back to digging holes in the back yard. Anyone have ideas how to stop her from digging? She even does it while I’m out there with her. Bad Dog :)

        • Call me Bee

          What kind of dog is it? Some just dig cuz its in their nature, like terriers. We have cocker spaniels. They have to sniff every single thing they encounter. It’s what they do.

          • DeTrop

            She’s a Basset Hound. We’ve had her 9 months and she’ll be 5 in June. So we don’t know much about her upbringing. She’s as pretty as a picture and loves being petted and taking walks. We have a fair-sized back yard for her but she gets walked every day or she’s not happy. BTW, she refuses to eat beef. In my life, I’ve never had a dog who wouldn’t eat beef.

            • Janet B

              Our three year old mutt ignores her food all day, probably in hopes of someone taking pity on her and give her some people food (rarely happens). It’s after 8p and she’s finally eating.

        • Pennymac

          I heard a rumor that if you put their poop in the holes they dig, they won’t do it anymore. Seriously. The melting snow revealed a poo minefield in my own yard.

        • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QFW22QV426LUOEPGASPZJWJMDE MishaFoomin

          Depends why she’s digging. Do you have mice/voles/moles? Maybe she is trying to help you. Grubs? Is she eating the dirt she digs? Maybe she is not getting enough vitamins or protein in her diet, and so is eating the dirt and/or grubs. Do you yell or scold when she digs while you are outside? Maybe she is looking for attention from you, or thinks it is a fun game to make you yell.

          • DeTrop

            You may be right about the Grubs. We’ve been treating the lawn for them and I had hoped they were gone. She is a picky, picky, eater and I’m at my wits ends. The Vet says to just take the food away if she doesn’t eat it within 20 minutes. If she doesn’t like it, she doesn’t care. I’ve tried giving her a daily vitamin but she won’t eat them. I’ve wrapped them in Pill Pockets. She eats the PP and leaves the pill. I’ve smeared them with cream cheese. No go. Thank you so much for your email. I do appreciate your time and info.

            • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QFW22QV426LUOEPGASPZJWJMDE MishaFoomin

              The trick with pills is to roll a ball of amazingly delicious stuff around the pill, like peanut butter or other goo, and with one finger shove it far back into the dog’s mouth, ideally onto the roof still in a ball shape. Letting the dog choose to take it and chew it like normal gives them time to work the pill out. Amp up the dog and excite them before feeding it so they may be more likely to inhale it down. Oh, and have some more treats ready and visible after feeding the hidden pill, so the dog may also be excited while eating and hurry to finish in order to get even more awesome treats.

            • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

              After you put the pill in the back of her mouth, tilt her head backward and stroke her throat to encourage swallowing.

            • demidaemon

              I’m so glad my dog seems to have an affinity for pills. Whenever someone takes a Tums or gets their daily meds out, he gets super excited. I wish I could pass some of that onto your dog.

        • Carrps

          Our doxies are also genetically programmed to dig. So, we would take them to the vacant lot nearby and let them dig to their hearts’ content. Kinda worked.

        • JMB_edits

          Coffee grounds (used) in the hole can help too.

        • SouthernGirlRena

          I don’t know how much effort you want to put into it or how big your back yard is but one of the tv dog trainers (I think it was on Me Or The Dog) put a small sand pit in the yard and hid toys in it. It was so fun to dig in their pit they didn’t bother with the rest of the yard anymore.

    • Artesian_Belle

      Oooph, Friday at last. Question: have others been watching Broad City? I love it so much so far. Anyone? Anyone?

      • MilaXX

        I just started watching. It was funnier than I expected.

      • Sarah

        It is creepily similar to my life, in several instances. I cringe watch it, but in a good way.

    • Swiftlytiltingplanet

      I’m hungry. I don’t know what I want to eat. The cats are insane. And evil. People were breathing my air at work, and I hate them all.

      GAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!

      • Call me Bee

        My favorite hashtag is: #catsareassholes

      • Sarah

        I NEVER know what I want to eat until somebody else suggests it. I’m thinking this is my excellent cook mother’s fault. I also have that convo “what do you want”/”NO what do YOU want” about five times a week. It is so frustrating. Also, cats were made cute expressly to make up for how diabolically evil they are.

        • Swiftlytiltingplanet

          Lately, food has just been so hard. I think because I live alone so it’s all on me. (And thanks to my somewhat poverty stricken childhood, I’m too cheap to eat out.)

          The other night one cat was peacefully on the couch with me, when there was a ruckus from upstairs into the kitchen. He looked at me like “WTF?!” and I was all “Don’t even. You’re the cat!”

          • Sarah

            Really. My four little beasts will investigate any and all noises they don’t approve of. Which is great for vermin control, but unfortunately we have many squirrels living in our attic due to a very rotten fascia board and lack of $8K to fix it, hence pitter-patter above and scamper-meow below.

            • Swiftlytiltingplanet

              * sigh * When they know what it is – as in the other 3 assholes, I mean cats – they ignore it. Though I will say the couple times a (clearly very stupid) mouse has attempted to move in, they’ve been all over it.

              The tiny girl in particular is “I am a fierce huntress! Touch my prey at your danger!” The last time, I had to put the growling tiny cat holding her teeny mouse in a grocery bag to move them outside – I didn’t want her dropping the mouse as I carried her.

            • Sarah

              Ha that’s funny. My tiny miss is also a fierce huntress! Actually, both ladies. The fat, fixed boys are lackadaisical at best. But miss Mandy (my bow-wearin’ avatar) who is a permakitten (she’s wee at 6) has rooted out and brought mama every mouse that has ever been dumb enough to surface in our homes. She also has a flat-mouse (an unstuffed artificial one) that she regularly puts in my shoe, on my pillow, etc.

            • Swiftlytiltingplanet

              Permakitten! Perfect! My Bella is a permakitten. She’s 8 and a fluffy tabby who loses half her size in the spring when she loses her fur. (I have, in the past, panicked until I remembered that it was just spring and that’s her real size.) I’m also pretty sure that she’s the brains of the kitty gang.

            • Sarah

              Oh, yes. Mandy is a genius. She does, after all have several graduate degrees, and she’s working on her lifelong dream of being in meowsical theater. (I’m sorry. I realize I just went into Full On Cat Weirdo mode, but I can’t really help it. They Rule me.)

            • Swiftlytiltingplanet

              I can tell from her picture that she is a cat of many talents. :-)

              (Oh, don’t apologize. My cats sign birthday cards, Christmas cards, whatever…I have mentioned to my family that they can stage an intervention when I start sending the family photos of the cats in cute cat outfits.)

          • SierraDelta

            Quickie meal (maybe courtesy of Chocolate & Zucchini?):

            Bring a pot of salted water to the boil, and toss in a handful of elbow macaroni. A minute before it’s done, toss in two-ish handfuls of fresh spinach. Drain, reserving a cup of the pasta water, and return to the pot, over low heat. Add butter, salt, and freshly grated nutmeg to taste. Toss in as much shredded Gruyere as your conscience, budget, or waistline will allow, and stir. Add some reserved pasta water if it needs it to loosen it up. Inhale.

            You can, of course, vary the cheese — Parmesan is nice — and play around with the other ingredients and amounts to suit your own tastes. The cat’s on his own.

            • Swiftlytiltingplanet

              Thank you!

            • SierraDelta

              *whispers* You can even eat this out of the pot. . . The cat and I won’t tell.

            • Swiftlytiltingplanet

              You’re the best!

          • Alloy Jane

            If single cooking decision-making is getting to you, might I suggest the way of the tortilla? I am the queen of overkill and accustomed to cooking for others, so it is very difficult for me to work up the will to cook for no one when I live on my own. The way I handle this is the way I handle eating while cooking, and that is to stuff things in a tortilla. If you have hummus and something green, shove it in a tortilla.

            Pretty much anything savory can go in one, including noodles. Yes, I carb on carb all the time. I like heating tortillas directly on the burner but you can always use a comal or cast iron pan if you don’t like them singed like I do. A fun variation on junk in a tortilla is tortilla sushi wraps! It’s just spicy hummus, radish sprouts, cucumber sticks, carrot sticks, sushi ginger, and a sheet of snacking nori. You just take your warm tortilla, spread some hummus, lay the nori sheet, then the radish sprouts and carrot sticks, cucumber sticks, and ginger on top. Then roll it up and nom nom nom!

            And for sweets, you should check out Chocolate Covered Katie. Healthy deserts that don’t taste healthy. Hell, she has a black bean brownie recipe that actually tastes like brownies! And she has a series of Single Lady sweets that are awesome. I make her single serving chocolate cake quite a bit.

            • Swiftlytiltingplanet

              Thanks!

        • SierraDelta

          “Also, cats were made cute expressly to make up for how diabolically evil they are.”

          Applies to tiny humans also.

          • formerlyAnon

            Though tiny humans are more mind-numbingly needy and demanding than evil. Cats have the lock on evil.

            • SierraDelta

              When I typed my comment last night, I was having flashbacks to the (long ago) days of directing my own personal tiny male humans to a toilet, with encouragement and directions on how to “Point, aim, and shoot.” One frigid winter day a few years later, I found them out in the back yard trying to print their names in the snow with the same equipment. And that is where my mind made the leap from Sarah’s “cute” to “diabolically evil.”

    • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

      Well – I didn’t get that job, which was a bummer, and husband’s security clearance still didn’t come through for his next contract, so things are still pretty precarious chez Foodycat. However, the wretched furball let us comb a big knot out of her bellyfur today, so we take our victories where we can.

      • Swiftlytiltingplanet

        Fools! They are fools for not hiring you!

        • altalinda

          Amen!

          • Call me Bee

            Ditto!

            • Rhonda Shore

              Something even better will come your way!

        • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

          Thank you! They made a very good point in their feedback, and it was a longshot but it would have been so amazing.

          • kimmeister

            At least you got useful feedback!

            • Sarah

              And she knows she didn’t get the job! (I am still hanging meself) NObody bothers to let you know anymore. It is so rude.

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              I know! When I didn’t hear after they said they would I thought “Huh. Another one of those”. So I was actually really impressed to get the rejection, however much it sucked.

      • marlie

        Bummer! Sorry to hear that. :(

      • YourBaloneyDontGotNoSecondName

        BIG HUGS! I can you some Tequila. And tuna in oil for your kitty. With feta cheese to sprinkle on it. My late niecekitty love love loved that.

        • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

          She’s a picky beast – doesn’t like people food except flakes of cod from the chippy. But it has to still be warm, freshly removed from the batter. I, however, will take the tequila with gratitude!

      • formerlyAnon

        Well, boo hiss. I prescribe alternating between head down, focused constructive activity and wallowing in cheap self indulgence. Adjust the balance point as seems advisable.

      • A Shiny O’Connor

        Well fair play to you for going for your dreams! Putting yourself out there will pay off eventually. And not just in smooth cat fur.

      • decormaven

        It’s going to coming around; take heart. And there’s nothing like getting to finally comb out a stubborn knot- that kitty knew you needed a little pick-me-up.

    • Call me Bee

      Well then–when myself and other BKs are on our pilgrimage to Chicago, we’ll just have to go there post TLo meet and greet. (!) Or–since, Dear Uncles, you’ll be at Old Orchard, and that’s on the fashionable North Shore, we can all go to my friend’s fabulous home in Evanston. We can surprise her!
      Oh–just kidding. I can’t wait. What’ll I wear?

      • Lucinda Head

        I watched a couple of eps of “Under the Gunn” and….what? The intro listing all the product tie-ins takes twenty minutes! Everything is so canned and staged and half-hearted. Is Tim Gunn preserved at night in a fridge from our friends at GE?

      • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

        Re: under the Gunn — the winning dress looked like Anya designed it. Other than that, I can’t remember a thing about the show. It’s totally forgettable.

    • bitchybitchybitchy

      I like all of the crimson-it’s kind of a classy bordello look-now where’s Belle Watling’s Chicago cousin?
      Home tonight, relaxing after a busy day of cleaning and errands. Perhaps I’ll break out some wine to enhance my relaxing.

      • Call me Bee

        I’d love to meet Belle Watling’s cousin.

        • Swiftlytiltingplanet

          Or Belle Watling.

    • GorgeousThings

      I’m right there with you my dears. Mercury or Venus must be retrograde. It’s been a week. But tonight I’m going to see my youngest perform in “Grease” at the high school. So that will be fun! Alas, we’re between shows on HBO, so I won’t be doing much TV watching, though I may watch an episode or two of House of Cards S2.

      • GorgeousThings

        Oh, and WTF is this I’m hearing about a meteorological “bomb” snowstorm on Tuesday into Wednesday?????

        • Pennymac

          Oh, hell no! Really?

          • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_QFW22QV426LUOEPGASPZJWJMDE MishaFoomin

            It’s the rumored storm I heard about on the radio on the way to work today. Woe is us. T_T

        • MilaXX

          They been talking N’oreaster on the news. I am not looking forward to it.

    • Nikko Viquiera

      So I just got a rejection letter from grad school. I’ll probably spend my weekend wallowing, any suggestion for a good wallowing movie?

      • CommentsByKatie

        Truly Madly Deeply! My go-to blanket and wine movie. Alan Rickman playing the cello and quoting Spanish poetry, and it offers a little bit of hope/happiness at the end…need I say more?

        • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

          Oh god yes. I howl every single time.

        • bitchybitchybitchy

          That is such a great movie-along with the one and only Alan Rickma (my fantasy spouse), it’s so honest and aching in its look at grief and loss-and it does give the heroine a chance at happiness….

        • Carrps

          Double thumbs up! So sweet and a little funny, too.

        • altalinda

          Love that movie!

      • Rhonda Shore

        I like 40s and 50s frothy comedies with a trash mag and a pint of Ben and Jerry’s for wallowing.

        • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

          Wallowing without ice cream is not proper wallowing. And it must be eaten right from the container. I’ve gotten quite good at it.

      • Alloy Jane

        For feeling better, My Neighbor Totoro with subtitles. For cowering in bed and vomiting misery, What Dreams May Come. For more Alan Rickman, Sense and Sensibility.

        • formerlyAnon

          Oh lord. Alan Rickman is So Hot in that movie. I cannot for the life of me understand why any of those women give Hugh Grant a second glance while Rickman’s still running around unmarried.

          • bitchybitchybitchy

            Among the many reasons I love Sense and Sensibility is that it’s one of those movies in which Rickman got to be a romantic figure!

          • Alloy Jane

            I think my favorite Alan Rickman role is from Dogma. I don’t go to the movies often, but I saw that one twice in the theatre. Plus, George Carlin and Hosties! Good times.

            • MoHub

              Alan Rickman is one of those actors I will watch in anything. Particularly love him in Bottle Shock.

      • altalinda

        Desperately Seeking Susan. Love Actually.

      • Jackie4g

        The Paper Chase c. 1973 about the idiocy of law school. Timothy Bottoms. John Houseman and I think Lindsay Wagner.

        • Stefanie Argudo Mackenzie

          Such a great movie. It’s in the current lineup on HBO, I think…

      • guest2visits

        Ok. Seeing others toss in some oldies but goodies I feel slightly less ashamed for this; Into the Night. 1985 Jeff Goldblum, Michelle Pfeiffer…lots of cameos. For when nothing is right. And it’s 2AM. It’s light, and you don’t want a moral or anything that necessarily makes a point….something to space out on.

      • formerlyAnon

        If you like Austen (that is, period costume and restraint), I like the version of Persuasion with Ciaran HInds as Wentworth for a comfort watch. It’s like watching grown ups do high school crushing and pining, and pining, and crushing till they finally smooch. It probably helps that I like the bones in Hinds’ face a very great deal.

        • bitchybitchybitchy

          I love that version of Persuasion-the couple that gets that second chance to get it right, and yes, I do love Ciaran Hinds, as well.

          • formerlyAnon

            I find yearning on screen way sexier than simulated intercourse, what can I say?

      • Stefanie Argudo Mackenzie

        The Age of Innocence?

        • bitchybitchybitchy

          I’d second that. The scene in the carriage when Newland unbuttons and removes Countess Olenska’s glove….major, major swoon.

      • decormaven

        Sorry about the letter. Movies are such a tricky thing, but a favorite for me will always be Moonstruck. The NYC locations, the wonderful script, and great ensemble of actors.

      • MilaXX

        Depends on your mood. I like a good action flick. Any of the Matt Damon Bourne movies, Die Hard movies or Taken movies are my personal favs.

        • BuffaloBarbara

          Oo, I’d go with Taken, and pretend that the daughter had real trouble with grad school admissions officers. Liam Neeson is going on Roaring Rampage of Revenge just for you.

      • bitchybitchybitchy

        Might I recommend the newish Liam Neeson movie, Non-Stop? I saw it 10 days ago, and it’s a fun action flick. My new favorite Neeson line is when he finally confronts the bad guy and growls “Am I in your way….ASSHOLE?” It’s kind of epic.

    • demidaemon

      Well, it’s been a mixed couple of weeks for me:

      1. This week, I tested my students on MLA; when grading these tests, I had a sad.
      2. Greatly enjoyed my beginning of spring break with my best friend; went apartment hunting in Baltimore and met many people I do not remember the names of at my soon-to-be grad school and got an ETA on when I will know about being a TA.
      3. Did not enjoy the rest of spring break with my Bro and SIL. Too much tiptoeing around issues and general bad mojo. Zoo visit at the Smithsonian National Zoo could have been a lot more enjoyable but SIL was a total pill throughout and I only got to see the baby panda through a camera, but that was kind of worth it.
      4. SIL dropped me off to Metro at 6:30 PM last Friday. Train did not leave until 3 AM following day. Still pissed about it.
      5. For that extra dose of FU from the universe, when I got back from my trip, found out my grandfather needs open heart surgery to fix a faulty valve. More tests are forthcoming and he seems pretty nonchalant about it, but I am not so much.

      YEAH. I did find my TLo signed postcard when I returned, but I’m hoping all of this means good news in April (that’s the ETA for the TA news). So, how’s everyone else doing?

      • Pennymac

        Was that an intentional slight by the SIL or an unavoidable train delay? Cause that’s some jacked up shit, right there.

        • demidaemon

          She just didn’t want to drive us (me and my my mother) in the dark. So, take that as you will.

          • marlie

            I take that as “shitty.”

          • alyce1213

            Hard to tell. I do know a few people who have real issues about driving in the dark, night blindness, or just fear and trepidation, which is also legitimate. Can you tell by her attitude? (Obsessing on this because you spent 9 hours in a train station and we want answers)

            • demidaemon

              On the one hand, she is a fairly new driver. On the other hand, she drives at night at least once a week for her job. On the one hand, she was pretty much the worst hostess ever during our stay. On the other hand, well…I can’t think of anything nice to say here.

            • formerlyAnon

              I am probably bringing my own history to bear, but: It sounds like it’s time for your brother to step up as a host. Unless, of course he’s ill or disabled. That was HIS mother who spent 9 hours at the train station. If his wife has reached the limits of either her ability or her willingness – or is maybe passive aggressively trying to get him to step up – then the ball’s in his court.

              You can tell me I’m wrong and missing the big picture because I very possibly am.

            • demidaemon

              Oh, not at all. To be fair, he did have to work a fair amount of the time while we were there, but he tried in his free time. But, he is clearly very whipped, which is hard for me to wrap my head around. My opinions as a man-loving man may not hold weight here. Her attitude just ruined any of his attempts. Also, they never have any food–even when they don’t have guests–and have a very messy apartment, which my mother attempted to clean while they were there. We ended up paying for and cooking most of the meals.

              But here’s a lovely story: while I was in a meeting with my advisor (in Baltimore; family is in Leesburg, VA), having kept my phone on to check e-mails from her to find where I needed to go and not turning it off because, who is going to call me, my SIL calls me. I ignore it, because why is she calling me, right? Later, after my whirlwind tour and meet and greet, which was fun but a little exhausting, I finally call her back. She tells me she still can’t get into her apartment (there was a text referencing this) and where is my mother (who had gone with my SIL and bro back too Virginia while I remained with my best friend in DC for a few days)? I ask if she’s called my mother and SIL says yes. At this point, I’m getting worried about my mother, who had injured her foot during our crazy walking spree the previous day. I call the apartment phone, figuring SIL had already done so but just to check. Well, my mother picks up, states SIL never called the apartment phone (my mother never has her cell phone on, which everyone knows), and never knocked to get in. YEAH.

            • Sarah

              Haha!

            • formerlyAnon

              Ha! So she’s either not bright or not very practical! I have a bit of sympathy since I also sometimes find my thinking stuck inside a box, but that seems an exceptional piece of lack-of-problem-solving ability.

              I doubt your preference for a same sex relationship impairs your understanding – one of the truisms upon which the tortoise that holds up the elephant that holds up the world rests is: You can never really tell from outside what’s going on between two people in a long term relationship. No matter how well you know them. There are costs & payoffs – sometimes unacknowledged but still there. Stuff is driven by stuff that not only will no one outside see, sometimes is unseen by the two involved.

            • demidaemon

              True that. When my mother said to me, “Let the games begin,” we all figured it was some sort of drama queeny vengeance thing.

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              The great A’tuin is wise.

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              “My opinions as a man-loving man may not hold weight here.” – I don’t see why not! Man-loving man, iguana-loving woman, we live in a society and there are certain expectations of hospitality!

            • demidaemon

              To be fair, what i meant is that I don’t see what he sees in her, physically (even though I know what a physically attractive woman looks like, it doesn’t really do anything for me, if you get my drift). I sort of understand what he sees in her “intellectually,” but I really think he could have shot a little bit higher.

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              Ah. Yeah, other people’s attraction can be baffling.

            • demidaemon

              Can’t agree with you more!

            • formerlyAnon

              It’s how she makes him feel. (Or, even, how she once at some pivotal point in the relationship made him feel. People go for decades on fumes.) Looks, intellect, even behavior can contribute or be completely irrelevant.

          • Pennymac

            Not cool.

          • MilaXX

            Was taking a cab not an option?

            • demidaemon

              Unfortunately, it would have been 80+ dollars, and my experience with the cab system of that area was not so pleasant to begin with.

          • SierraDelta

            She did that to YOUR MOTHER?! My late MIL was programmed to care only for blood relatives, which meant I was essentially just a womb on legs to her, but I treated her with (chilly) respect because it was important for my sons to see someone being the adult in the Grandma/Mom relationship. The most important learning sometimes is the result of thoughtful observation, followed by reflection and occasional discussion, especially with children.

            The Greeks would have visited swift retribution on your SIL for gross violation of the laws of hospitality. You are clearly a lovely, caring, thoughtful, witty, and generous man, and I apologize on behalf of all sisters-in-law for the obviously defective version that you (and your mother) have been saddled with.

            • demidaemon

              THANK YOU!

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

        I don’t think I like your SIL.

        Hope all goes well for your grandfather.

        • demidaemon

          To be fair, I think the only one who unequivocally likes her is my brother, and even he questions her sometimes.

          Latter point: Me too. Me too.

          • SierraDelta

            This summer my brother realized with profound shock that his wife had really never liked him during the 30 years of their marriage.
            He had been so deeply in love with her for that whole time that he never saw her as she was — petty, vindictive, self-absorbed, and selfish on a grand and destructive scale.

            His world imploded when she announced that she wanted a divorce, but he’s seeing an excellent therapist, and we, the family my about-to-be-former SIL repeatedly belittled and trashed over the years, have rallied to support him. He’ll come out of this stronger than she will because he’s at heart a decent man who learns from his mistakes and has the strength and faith to move forward. Eventually. As the astute women above have observed, you never truly know what goes on in another couple’s relationship — and sometimes they’re just as much in the dark as we are, too. The human heart is a strange and mysterious thing.

            Love your brother as much as you’re able to for now. Prayers for your family, especially your grandfather, and please let us know how this all sorts out.

            • demidaemon

              Thank you. I don’t condone adultery, but my mother has alluded to this at points. Also, I perhaps know more about how their relationship works as we all cohabitated for about a year and a half with my parents. YEAH.

            • formerlyAnon

              as we all cohabitated for about a year and a half with my parents. YEAH.

              O.k. That casts a new and mildly horrifying light on things. So, this is just variations on an OLD dance for everybody? You know your part in this dance, then and I’ll just say that sometimes (not always) fairly small shifts on one person’s part can at least change their own experience – I hope you find the shifts that keep you connected to your brother while sparing yourself some drama.

            • demidaemon

              Yep. Pretty much.

            • demidaemon

              I also feel awful for your brother, but, hopefully, more wonderful things are just on the horizon for him.

            • SierraDelta

              The one part of this that I’ll never forgive my SIL for is the collateral damage to my nieces. They’re in their early 20s, and one of them told me recently that she never ever felt that her mother loved her — growing up, she and her sister ranked somewhere behind the dogs, and my brother was a distant third in his wife’s affections. Be a bitch on your own time, I say.

              My brother’s being reborn, with the help of a one-of-a-kind therapist. He’s made tremendous progress in looking back over the years and seeing where he missed things, and he’s committed to sharing this very raw and painful process with his daughters. He’s one of the walking wounded for now, but he’s started writing poetry again, and his dormant sense of whimsy is stirring. He’s beginning to think about what he wants his life to be and taking steps to make it so.

            • formerlyAnon

              Your brother and their kids have had a hard time. I hope things continue to look up for them.

            • SierraDelta

              You write the kindest, wisest, most comforting things!

            • formerlyAnon

              Thanks. I am over-free with my opinions, I know, but I try to be encouraging. It is paying it forward for all the support I’ve gotten over the years though it’s a drop in the bucket compared to how I’ve been blessed.

            • SierraDelta

              I think it’s the encouraging that resonates with me. The fact that you share so generously gives hope, too; and your voice of experience lets us know that we’re not alone, when it’s so easy to think we are.

            • demidaemon

              Thank you. I’m glad to hear of the positives that are coming out of that dreadfulness, despite everything that happened. Luckily, on my side of things, there are no children involved. Yet. I don’t know if it will stay that way, because they are trying, but I really don’t think either of them are emotionally mature enough or financially ready for a child. They can barely handle their cat as is.

              You are an awesome sister, and , hopefully, I can be there for my brother when needed.

      • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

        With the minimally invasive open heart surgeries being done now, valve surgery is not what it used to be. Had my aortic valve replaced five years ago next month and was back at work part time in 2.5 weeks and full time the next week.

        For aortic valves, it’s a minimally invasive procedure with a scar that’s only a few inches long. For mitral valves, it’s done robotically from the side. Research the doctors in his area and find the one who specializes in the technique for the valve he’s having difficulty with. Don’t just ask people to recommend the best heart surgeon. It has to be one who knows the newest method for his specific problem. Good luck to him.

        • demidaemon

          Thanks. Right now, we don’t even know which valve is problematic. He just had his yearly stress test and they determined that it was a valve problem. Hopefully, with more tests, we’ll know more specifics and he can go from there. I assume he’ll be going to Strong Hospital (in the Rochester NY area), so maybe we can know more from that. The more worrying problem is my grandmother, who has bad hearing and is definitely in the stages of some sort of dementia (it could be Alzheimer’s, but the medication she is on for it seems to be doing more harm than good–severely reduced appetite), and the fact that she depends so much on my grandfather just for moral support.

          • decormaven

            That’s a tricky situation with your grandmother and grandfather. Hold tight- sounds like he is made of sturdy stuff.

          • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

            You’re so lucky to still have your grandparents. Your grandfather will be fine and will be there for your grandmother. Before I had my surgery, a nurse said to my friend, “Don’t worry. A heart they can fix.” Aside from the awkward sentence structure (throw Mama from the train a kiss), I found that very comforting and she was right.

            As for your grandma’s eating problem — that’s a major reason for Ensure.

            • demidaemon

              I know. I actually was lucky enough to have my great grandparents in my life for a long time (my one great grandmother survived, I think, four kinds of cancer and three husbands before a last bout of strangely placed cancer). The eating problem has kind of snowballed, as both of them were eating very healthily–mostly to control my grandfather’s diabetes, which their diet was doing a bang-up job of–but now that she doesn’t eat as much and doesn’t trusts herself enough to cook, well, he’s kind of backpedaled. Her memory problems have been exacerbated by self-confidence issues. :(

            • formerlyAnon

              The declining years of old age are cruel.

      • decormaven

        Take the postcard as a sign of reversal of fortunes. Better things ahead. Console youself that when you settle in at Baltimore, you’ll go back and do the Zoo proper.

        • demidaemon

          Part of the problem is that every time I go to a zoo with my family, we always go tot the reptile house first and spend way too much time there. t least I bought a magnet with an excruciating adorable picture of the baby panda on it.

      • Sarah

        I used to visit the Nat’l zoo a few times a month, even though I grew up in the suburbs. My mom was kind enough to take me into the city for the PANDAS YAY!!! The baby doesn’t come out much, you should check the webcam instead! So sorry about the train, ugh. And if your grandfather feels okay about it, that’s half the battle right there. Not being scared makes you stronger. As for the SIL, screw that jazz, yo.

        • demidaemon

          Yeah, it didn’t help that we totally got lost throughout the zoo. It was fun, nevertheless, even though I was almost passing out on my feet (3 AM arrival with an hour and a half wait for a cab and 3ish hours of sleep. My best friend was awesome and made me pancakes that morning, though!). Yeah, my grandfather’s a hard one to read. Definitely a stoic who, at this point, doesn’t really care what anyone else thinks. Which I kind of appreciate, despite the negatives of that POV.

          SIL: I have wrote so many poems about our “interactions” that I have been forbidden to publish by my mother, but I am VERY close to rebelling against this mandate, just because they are great poems, despite the content. I also default to your opinion on dealing with difficult relative relations.

          • Sarah

            I’m lucky my jerky relation is my dad. I mean, that doesn’t SOUND lucky but I really like my sister & brother, and I know I’m blessed that I love their spouses, too. Your elderly dad is easy to ignore, but not the husband and wife of your peers! Keep writing your poems. I have a similar body of fine art that is full of crappy-dad angst, but thankfully visual art is much more widely interpreted, so while it helped me, it doesn’t necessarily scream “this chick hates her father” like I felt when I made that stuff. And hells yeah for BFF pancakes. That’s superb supportive friendship, right there.

            • demidaemon

              I totally get what you are saying. Yeah, my poems are pretty clear-cut mostly, although they do have fun with metaphors. I was actually the best man in their wedding, and I was the only one–according to my brother–who didn’t question the nuptials. SIL is the only woman my brother has ever dated. My father, having gone through a similar experience with his first wife (a truly bat-crazy lady who now lives in Florida and gave her youngest son the same first name as me), wanted my brother to think about, you know, not being so quick to settle. Did not go over well at all. I now feel guilty having had those thoughts but leaving it to others to voice them.

              I know some people hit it out of the park on the first try, but that is quite the rare occasion.

              COMPLICATED. My BFF is a super awesome yet kind of oblivious visual artist/poet lesbian. One of a kind, and I wouldn’t have her any other way.

            • SierraDelta

              My absolute favorite pancake recipe calls for rum. Totally delicious and addictive — although not the breakfast you should eat if you plan to breathe on anyone in a position of authority for an hour or so. I’d be happy to send it to you for your next encounter with either your BFF or your SIL.

          • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

            Publish and be damned.

            • SierraDelta

              HEAR HEAR!!!

      • formerlyAnon

        Glad you had a good time with the BFF. Really sorry to hear about your grandfather. Let’s hope his “no big deal” take is realistic. If he’s otherwise strong, a lot of heart surgery today is as near to routine as heart surgery can be.

        Unsolicited advice, apology for speaking without knowing everything, but I have history that compels me:

        Sounds like maybe you need to either embrace the black sheep role and let your mom, brother, and sister-in-law get together without your mediating presence or you need to arrange things so you and your brother (and mom, if she’s up for it) take over logistics, and leave nothing to your sister-in-law’s responsibility? If your brother’s not capable, it’s in your lap. Sucks, but sometimes family is easier when you look at the setup with a cold eye.

        • demidaemon

          It’s difficult, because my brother and I are very close (after a tumultuous teenage history) and, clearly, he’s very lonely despite the fact that he’s married. It would be nice to just stay out of it (God, I wish I could!), but certain factors kind of prevent it. It’s something that is hard to convey in typed text. But I appreciate all the advice and support!

          PS: I am obviously feeling very parenthetical today. Who knew?

          • formerlyAnon

            Ha. I am prey to the parenthetical phrase. Also to sometimes-but not always-really-subordinate clauses delineated by commas. My natural metier is the 19th century novel, obviously.

            Trying to be supportive and available to your brother while bounding circumstances that make you despair over (want to kill) your sister-in-law has to be difficult. I’ve been there, but with a friend which is easier than family – far fewer expectations to spend time with both of them. Good luck.

            • Sarah

              Hear hear for parenthetical phrases, subordinate clauses, semi-colons, and Capitalization for Emphasis (because I’m lazy about HTML code and don’t bother to italicize or boldify)!

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              Capitalisations for emphasis are a Good Thing.

            • formerlyAnon

              You and Sarah are My People, obviously.

            • SierraDelta

              Apparently this is THE WISDOM FOR THE PAIN SECTION of the Lounge this weekend.

              I was talking to my brother just last night about how being able to share knowledge you’ve learned the hard way in the hope of helping someone else sort things out is about the only silver lining I can see in the big black cloud of Life Sucks, So What Else Is New?

              There should be more punctuation in that sentence, but I have no idea where it should go, so feel free to put these anywhere you’d like: , . / ‘ ” ] } ! & * ( _ ) ~

    • Pennymac

      Its been scary status quo in Appalachia, y’all. My boss is in a pissing contest with a local small town sheriff, (Google Harlan County KY for an accurate example), I had 48 hours to produce an event for a political fundraiser, and I went to a town hall meeting in another county that served up some lynch mob realness. I’m feeling alternately discouraged, disgusted, and exhausted.
      I declare a weekend free of make up and intend on wearing stretch pants as mush as possible. Plus, chocolate.

      • Isabel

        Hope next week is better. Maybe the cold weather made everyone super cranky.

      • guest2visits

        Now I have a picture of hillbilly mayhem in my head; with the entire cast of several well known shows. So have a slice on me; I just made a 3 layer cake with chocolate buttercream frosting. Hoping your weekend is better.

      • decormaven

        Hope you’ve been watching past seasons of Justified. Sounds like you’re not seeing government at its finest. Bless you for being in the trenches.

      • MilaXX

        Like Justified? Harlan County?

        • Pennymac

          Like Kentucky Justice….

      • formerlyAnon

        Hope things get easier for you. Sounds like your job puts you in the right place to witness all the worst in people. Having several law enforcement folk in my family, I can say that long term, that does nothing good for a psyche.

    • http://www.ellenciompi.com/ NurseEllen

      It’s 70 degrees outside and it’s a gorgeous day in Chapel Hill, NC, but I am deep in the bowels of the hospital, just HATING it that I am missing the sunshine. Good news is that I am going to a tea party tomorrow with my adult daughter and the little 8 year old she cares for. We are all wearing our best floral dresses, hats, and gloves! Little tea cakes and china cups will be balm after the past week. I do have my TLo book magnet up on my locker at work and it’s gotten a lot of comments. If there’s a spike in Chapel Hill book sales, you’ll know why!

      • bitchybitchybitchy

        The tea party sounds exactly the right thing to make up for a lousy week-enjoy!

      • decormaven

        Tea time in the spring! Savor it.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

        Tea in hats and gloves sounds like the perfect pick-me-up!

      • formerlyAnon

        That little girl is so lucky! What fun.

    • Suzanne Moore

      I’m ordering an Italian margarita. It’s been a stressful week. I got rejections for my romance novel and the education mag I write for all on the same day. Then my sweet hubby had to fly to Nigeria for two weeks. He got there okay and we Skype, but still…make that two Italian margaritas, please. I’ll be the one sitting in the corner nursing my lonesome self and my heavily bruised ego.

      • Isabel

        My BIL came back from Nigeria. He went there for work. Very long trip.

        Better luck next week on your writings.

      • SouthernGirlRena

        I have no idea what an Italian margarita is but I love margaritas and all things Italian so I’ll take two also. I promise to say unflattering things about your publishers.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

        You aren’t talking about pizzas, are you?

        • Suzanne Moore

          No, but a pizza sounds good too!

          An Italian margarita is a regular margarita combined with a splash of Amaretto. (It cuts the acid bitterness and the ‘mouth feel’ is smooth. )

          • decormaven

            Oooh, I’m all over that one. That may be on our summer bar rotation.

          • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

            How divine. An amaretto sour is my favourite sweet cocktail, so lengthening that in a margarita sounds superb to me!

    • lillyvonschtupp

      I want a cat so much, but I’m allergic to them.:0(

      • Suzanne Moore

        We lost our 18 year old cat to kidney disease last October. Had her for 16 years. My husband travels all over, so I spent more time with Carmen (Queen of the Universe) than I did with him. I miss The Queen big, big, big time.
        Will allergy pills help? My nephew takes them so he can keep his cat.

        • bitchybitchybitchy

          Mr. B3 is actually somewhat allergic to cats, and decided to live with the allergy so that we could keep the one and only Genghis kitty in our home-for which I am everlastingly grateful.

          • lillyvonschtupp

            When he decided to make you Mrs. B3, were the cats a part of the deal?;0)

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              They weren’t. We actually always considered ourselves to be dog people, and expected to adopt a dog after we retired, but instead Genghis literally walked in the front door 7 years ago. We intially thought we’d foster him til we could find a rescue org that would take him,but a good family friend suggested Mr. B3 consult her allergist, and the rest is history. Mr. B3 is as potty about the cat as I am, and that’s pretty potty!

          • kimmeister

            He’s a keeper for sure!

          • Jackie4g

            A home with a Genghis is a good place to be. Greetings and salutations to all from one Genghis’ home to another.

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              Greetings from our catlord and master to yours!

          • Suzanne Moore

            Genghis is a great name for a cat! I can just imagine the havoc he creates now…

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              He’s generally well behaved, given his name, but occasionally feels the need to remind the staff who is in charge-Mr. B3 found his toothpaste in the trashcan recently-Genghis decided to play a prank!

        • lillyvonschtupp

          Im sorry about your kitty dying. Im sure she meant a great deal to you. I never thought about medication, but’ Ill look into it. Thanks!

          • Suzanne Moore

            Thanks. Do check out allergy pills. My nephew takes one of the other-the-counter ones, but had to go through several before finding one that did the trick.

        • Rhonda Shore

          I’m so sorry for your loss. I know how hard it is to lose a beloved pet.

          • Suzanne Moore

            Thanks, Rhonda. Even my Texas-tough hubby turned blubbery…and we both still tear up from time to time. But we’re planning on getting a rescue kitty soon. We obviously need a feline to boss us around!

        • Stefanie Argudo Mackenzie

          My sister. I just lost my Emma last week. She was the kitty that saw me through my husbands illness and death and then my kids getting all edumacated and going off to live great lives. I miss her so much. Talk to an allergist..there’s lots that can be done for feline allergy. Here’s to happiness with a new feline friend.. I have my tiny baby, Muffin, still with me, but she’s not Emma.

          • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

            I’m so sorry.

            • Stefanie Argudo Mackenzie

              Thank you, Alicia.

          • Suzanne Moore

            Oh dear, I’m so sorry about Emma! Big hugs.

            • Stefanie Argudo Mackenzie

              Thank you

          • formerlyAnon

            I’m sorry, sounds like you lost a real friend.

            • Stefanie Argudo Mackenzie

              Thanks..I did. She was the cat you get once in a lifetime if you’ve been divinely favored. And somehow I won the kitty lotto….

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              I hope all cat-lovers get that one cat. I entered the family at about the same time as a lovely cat called Bernie – for my aunt, he is the echt cat. My current cat is mine. I think she’s saved my sanity, if not actually my life.

          • lundibleu

            Sorry to hear that. We lost our Kaia at the beginning of February, and our other elderly cat is suffering from feline dementia which is difficult. It’s so difficult when they go, I keep thinking I still see her at times, or hear her calling to be let in from the garden.

            • Stefanie Argudo Mackenzie

              I’m so sorry. You may be seeing and feeling her. I do believe they hang back for a bit if they’ve left someone behind. I think I see Emma from time to time, and I think I hear her scratching. My other cat is declawed, so I know it’s not Emma. Feline dementia isn’t much better than it is in people. Bless you..you really are having it right now. My prayers for you all.

      • kimmeister

        Awww, that sucks!

        • lillyvonschtupp

          It really does!:0(

      • alyce1213

        I know how that is, I’ve always been allergic to cats in varying degrees, very badly with certain breeds (e.g., Siamese). BUT – my son found a 5-wk old black kitten in the street about a year ago, maybe a feral, I don’t know. I told him to bring her home, with some trepidation. She was sweet and got a clean bill of health from the vet. Turns out, I’ve never had an allergic reaction of any kind to her! And we’re seriously in each other’s faces. I have no explanation for it, I thought it might be because we found her so young (??), I don’t know, I don’t know cat stuff. But it’s sort of miraculous.

      • BuffaloBarbara

        They’re worth the sniffles. Also, repeated exposure to an allergen can dull down the allergy. That was the theory behind the shots I used to get. (Though I note that it hasn’t done a darned thing about my juniper allergies. I wish I could choose to just not have juniper pollen in the air!)

        • Stefanie Argudo Mackenzie

          Drink gin and build the immunity from the inside!

          • formerlyAnon

            God, if only this worked.

    • Musicologie

      The best advice I got this week was from my sister, in reference to a relative who was being too nosy about my son’s feeding habits: “Don’t mind her. She sanitizes library books.”

      • A Shiny O’Connor

        May I steal that? GENIUS!

      • BuffaloBarbara

        I do, too. Then again, I’m a librarian and I only do it to books that really deserve it.

        • Sarah

          We just get our “volunteens” to do it. I mean, they are REALLY filthy sometimes, you just gotta.

          • demidaemon

            This fact scares me, considering some horror stories I’ve heard from librarians and writing center staff people.

            • Sarah

              Heh, I just meant the grime that comes from grubby fingers, but sure – sometimes there are worse things.

            • demidaemon

              Oh, yes. When I was undergrad, one of my friends (who worked in the writing center) had a man grab a Cosmopolitan from the magazine rack, come near her, and start masturbating. YUCK. Luckily, he was eventually arrested, but still.

              My brother’s library has also been having a problem with the homeless spending the night in the library and doing unmentionable things there.

            • Sarah

              Yikes. My experience with jackers-off has always been in conjunction with the public use computers. And what, do they not lock the doors at your brother’s library? Yikes! I’m lucky I work at a suburban branch, so the weirdoes are mostly culled from the herd for lack of cars to get here. Not that we don’t have a few, but still. I used to work at a downtown location, and the foot traffic was particularly riff-raffity.

            • demidaemon

              I think the problem at my brother’s library is that the cleaning staff would come in late at night and either leave the doors unlocked or forget to relock them. It’s sad, because his library is a historical genealogical library with many one of a kind documents.

            • Sarah

              NO GOOD. Time to hire night security, stat.

            • demidaemon

              Unfortunately, it is run by the town board and they won’t even add a new full time position, despite the need. BUREAUCRATIC WOES.

    • kimmeister

      Not a good week for allergies, but I got an unexpected compliment on my abs from my male fitness instructor so I’ll call it even! Took the day off because my cubicle is being temporarily moved to another building. Used my time off to get my first haircut in 7 months, and am now trying to make my mom’s pho recipe for the first time. It smells amazing!

      • alyce1213

        Yay to the abs, haircut and PHO!! I’ll bet is was great.

        • Jackie4g

          You’re a brave spirit. Just get the haircut for the moment and see how you feel about the color once you’ve got the cut.

          • alyce1213

            That’s probably what I’ll do. Thanks.

            • formerlyAnon

              If you’ve gone 2 months or more without recoloring, hang in there! Don’t waste the suffering you’ve already put in!

        • kimmeister

          I’ve not colored my hair in 4 years – taking advantage of the fact that I don’t have grays yet. Out of the blue, a different stylist asked me if it was my natural color and raved about it. Then mine suggested getting clip on bangs for fun, so she ordered me some! Always good to try something new!

          • alyce1213

            I’ve got some grays, which look whitish-blonde, and some fading of my natural color (gingery). I’ve got to do something, one way or the other.
            What did you use for the pho — beef bones? oxtail? Tell!

            • kimmeister

              The broth had beef bones, a couple of chicken drumsticks, star anise, ginger, coriander seeds, roasted white onion, salt, and … a little msg.

            • formerlyAnon

              Yum. Sounds delicious!

              I don’t use it because what I call wide-spectrum-allergies (e.g.allergic to so many different things only testing can sort it out) abound in my family, but it’s impossible to deny that a bit of msg adds something.

            • kimmeister

              It has no flavor in and of itself, but it enhances the flavor of whatever you put it in. Had a dickens of a time finding it for purchase though (for obvious reasons) .

            • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

              There’s a reason why most Asian restaurants say “We do not use MSG” on their menus. The “Chinese headache” was publicized in the late ’70s or early ’80s and customers demanded that it be eliminated in restaurants. I never get the headache, but it does play havoc with my intestines. Every now and then, I’ll try a new restaurant where they say they don’t add MSG but I still get that awful reaction. Turns out many prepared sauces the restaurant purchases may contain it.

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              The little supermarket attached to our post office sells it, labelled “gourmet powder”.

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              Since I started roasting the onions and ginger for my broth, it has improved so much! Must add coriander seeds next time.

      • formerlyAnon

        Mmmmm. Soup. I am mainlining soup because I’m fighting off a respiratory virus and I totally believe garlic and chiles in a chicken soup base cures almost anything.

        • zenobar

          Great minds think alike. Garlic is a helping food. Garlic just wants to help! Thank you, Garlic. (And hey, Ginger, come on up and get some of this love.)

        • SierraDelta

          Or hot tea steeped with honey and fresh ginger slices. Or plain yogurt with honey and grated fresh ginger. Or crystallized ginger randomly popped into your mouth Because.

          • formerlyAnon

            Mmmmm. Hot lemon &water with honey (and ginger if I’m feeling energetic about slicing & peeling) is my go to once the virus has fully triumphed over my immune system.

    • Carrps

      Anybody at all still watching “Under the Gunn” ??? So, is Asha a bitch or was she just edited that way?

      • kimmeister

        She sure came across that way…

        • Sarah

          Yeah, I think it’s real. She REALLY resented the shiz out of Natalia and just could barely keep it in.

          • MoHub

            She kept it in? Not on my teevee.

            • Sarah

              Excellent point.

      • NMMagpie

        I think the answer is somewhere in the middle. These shows depend on drama to get viewers and I think the edit helped that. But if anyone decides they are not going to work with someone, the result is always chaos. And it was. That whole mini-collection was atrocious.

      • JMB_edits

        Probably both, although starting with “I’m going to be positive” really has the opposite effect!!!!

        • Kari Roberts

          The only real positive thing she did was trying to bite her tongue when she really wanted to lash out. Unfortunately, it was also quite obvious that she was biting her tongue.

          Mondo appeared to do all but bite her head off.

          • alyce1213

            I’m not quite sure why she wanted to lash out. What was her big problem?

            • Kari Roberts

              She felt the gals that went home last two weeks should of gone AFTER Natalia was sent packing, not before.

      • Frank_821

        I agree it’s more likely in the middle. I think Asha lacks a certain self-awreness the way Gretchen lacked it in her season. Not the same degree but the same type

        Personally I think Mondo was being a bigger bitch-regardless of editing. He’s been in that situation himself when he was first paired on ateam challenge with Michael Costello. You would think that whole experience (and how he was in the wrong goign into it) could have served as a good lesson for Asha

        • Rhonda Shore

          Mondo has acted like a grade A dick, with his angry little face last week, complaining to the judges, while his designers clothes were so so and Asha’s were hideous two weeks in a row. .

          • lillyvonschtupp

            I developed a real dislike for Mondo after the all-stars show. Plus he shows no growth as a designer.

          • Call me Bee

            No kidding. Telling the judges that they sent the wrong person home was all sorts of rude. And he continued with his “mentoring” this week. A dick indeed.

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              Mondo isn’t making any new friends this time around.

      • Rhonda Shore

        I’m glad you brought this up. It seems like organized bullying sessions, with Tim in on it (at Mood). It’s been painful to watch that level of cruelty. I might never watch any of the runway shows again.

        • conniemd

          Yeah, totally, probably was more Lifetime than Mondo and Asha. I felt like it was everyone ganging up on Nick and Natalia. For the most part the show had avoided the drama bullshit, so I was disappointed that they have reverted to it the last couple of weeks. It was a very unpleasant episode to wach.

          • bitchybitchybitchy

            I’ve lost some respect for Mondo after watching UTG. I understand that the show has been set up to create tension among the mentors since one of them will win along with a designer, but Mondo is coming across as someone who has a sense of entitlement, and a bit of a mean streak. As for Anya, she showed some cattiness during her season on PR, going after the less attractive Becky at one point. A pox on all of them, at this point.

            • Sarah

              I agree about Mondo. I was sorry for him when he didn’t win his season, and I think he deserved it, design-wise, still, but I’m not sure I like him as a person. IDK if the format brings out the worst, as you pointed out, or if it is just seeing the way he interacts when he’s in a position of some authority, but I suspect it’s a little of both. Either way, I liked Natalia and I think she was very gracious, but I would’ve been so gratified to see her just say “You know what? You guys are being MEAN and I am tired of it.”

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              I certainly thought that Natalia was really worn down by the negativity from the other designers, and the other mentors. She handled an ugly situation well.

            • MoHub

              I think Natalia had reached her breaking point and threw herself under the bus to get out of an unhealthy situation. Her dress wasn’t nearly as bad as Asha’s “dashiki,” which reminded me of the shower-curtain outfit that got Stacy Estrella eliminated first in season 3 of PR.

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              OMG-you’re taking me back in the day to dear little Stacy and her shower curtain. I agree that Natalia took herself out of a bad situation. In a way, I respect her for recognizing that, and showing a healthy sense of Get the Hell out of here.

      • alyce1213

        Flat-out bitch. Where the hell does she come off being so superior and judgey about another contestant? For two weeks in a row, she’s sent utter crap down the runway. Last week’s outfit was a badly-constructed mess to begin with, and when the bottom was turned up for the conversion, it looked like baboon (orangutan?) butt walking. This week’s was worse. That tablecloth runner (curtain panel) with ugly trim may be the biggest insult I’ve seen on any PR show. It looked like a very young child’s project. And she was all blamey on Natalia for cutting the bottom on a curve, AS IF that were the problem. The judges favor her for her “creativity,” but what it comes down to for me is that she has a lot of ideas that don’t work. Nonetheless, it appears that the fix is in for Asha to make the finals, no matter what she sends down the runway.
        Also Oscar, who deserves a spot, and either Shan or the young one.

        • Rhonda Shore

          I really like Oscar.

          • kimmeister

            He was so gracious when asked who he thought should win.

        • guest2visits

          I thought Asha’s design last week HAD to be the worst thing I’ve ever seen on PR; or at least one of 3 all time worst ideas. This week may be it’s runner up, though. I didn’t know how or why she got past last week’s disaster – it wasn’t even listed in the bottom 2. Now it simply looks like the show is going to carry her forward at all costs.

        • dickylarue

          Asha sucks at life and Mondo’s an enabling entitled twatwaffle. That’s what I walked away with from Under The Gunn the past couple of weeks. I’m saddened that Tim needs money enough to let this ridiculata go down on a show that is more his than Runway. The bullying (and I hate using that word these days) of Natalia was reprehensible. Michelle’s clothing were style-less sacks and I actually liked several things Natalia walked. And Asha throwing Natalia under the bus this week was gross. I thought for sure Tim would try to curtail this kind of stuff, but between the insanely cruel bitchery and the blatant product placement this show has been a disaster in my eyes.

          • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

            Tim lost all credibility for me when he allowed them to shut him up. They paid him off by making him a producer and he has been their puppet ever since.

      • Agnes Gooch

        Watching it but didn’t enjoy it one iota this week, other than the precious few moments of classy behavior from Oscar, Shan and Sam. Natalia was a fleeing victim. Nick was a cowering coward. Mondo and Asha were just…awful and it can’t be blamed on editing hijinks. They’re just farking iceholes. And Tim, who is supposed to stand for all that is good and classy in this world? WTH? This feels like a massive miscalculation on the producers’ parts as happened on Top Chef: Texas when TPTB seemed to think that the audience wanted to see that one mousy chef get beaten on by the nasty bullies. Most nauseating moment from this episode? Asha’s talking head interview (after Natalia’s departure) with the dangly cross earring suddenly prominently on display. Yuck.

        • BuffaloBarbara

          I rarely enjoy the team challenges, and this was no exception. They seem designed for the ‘reality tv drama’ quotient, not for the contest part.

          I could have watched the whole hour of Oscar and Shan. At least they won.

          Asha… was being bitchy, but I don’t know that I’d automatically put her in the “a bitch” category, if that makes sense as a distinction. I’d probably be worried more about Natalia’s time issues, even more than her construction. Nicky, that’s the kind of mentoring the girl needed: Sit down and work on how much she can realistically expect to do and break the problem down at the beginning so she could get the steps right. But none of the mentors seems to be allowed to mentor. They’re encouraging them to just wander around and say, “Yeah, look at that. It’s a thing on a dress form. Good on you.” I’d love to see actual mentoring in a show where mentors ostensibly compete.

          • Agnes Gooch

            I”m quite content to assign Asha to the bitch category. And she clearly seemed to think she was going to win the viewers’ affection with her rants and put-upon fuming. Hasn’t quite worked out that way.

        • Carrps

          Agree whole-heartedly. Can’t stand people who make a big show of their Christianity, but display none of it in their behavior.

      • guest2visits

        Aggressively bitchy to Natalia, Mondo too. If they actually said these words and displayed this behavior, I don’t see how much editing would’ve helped to show the ‘softer side’ of either one.
        Asha needed a scapegoat for her lousy work and luckily Natalia was a handy excuse. Asha let anyone in earshot (including Natalia at one point) hear her scorn for Natalia’s ability. I thought I was listening to IVY again. Natalia’s dress and shorts weren’t wonderful but they were certainly better than Asha’s designs. And the bed sheet fabric selection was all Asha’s choice, as was the lack of a cohesive look for the collection. And because Asha took complete stewardship of the challenge; the big flop was also in her domain. But after all she said and did, when the judges asked who should stay or go – Asha held her breath knowing what an outright unworkable, undeniably undermining team leader she had been to Natalia. Asha decided tears & sobs about how much she wanted to stay would work better than the truth about her behavior or about her work on the RW. Natalia surprised the hell out of me when she gave Asha an easy out – not calling her on anything but simply bowing out. Not something I would’ve done. And so she made a very gracious exit from some miserable conditions on UTG. Mondo who obviously wants to promote Asha no matter what crappola she makes – because he wants to win HIS end of the contest, was nothing but an enemy to Natalia. There was no mentoring in his advice for her. And Nick who has been so involved suddenly has no ability to stop others from taking shots at his designer? What? Where was Nick in speaking up for Natalia to the judges? Don’t tell the camera how much you believe in her – tell the judges Nick!!
        And Tim…. where was Tim in all this bad mentoring….if he could step in about Nick’s mentoring surely he could counsel the others about their behavior too. UTG is leaving a bad taste; it keeps coming up with more and more reasons why this is another wretched idea for PR.
        I do like bonus prizes (finally) for keeping the designers more alert & maybe just because they need the cash.

        • Trickytrisha

          Asha’s so-called dashiki was hideousity to the max. She and Mondo are turning into the middle school bullies that everyone hated but
          kowtowed to. I’ll be super surprised if this show gets a second season. Whoever is responsible for this trainwreck owes Tim Gunn an apology.

          • Sarah

            That ridiculous dashiki was grounds for dismissal dammit. SO BAD.

        • bitchybitchybitchy

          I wonder if Nick felt constrained by Tim’s admonishment and held back for this challenge. I thought that Natalia was really gracious and adult in her decision to allow herself to be eliminated.I”m not sure that Asha deserved that, but now it’s up to her to really step up and design something worthwhile instead of that pile of dreck that she turned out.

          • MoHub

            I think Nick was a little put off by Mondo’s aggressive snapping at Natalia and Tim’s apparent support of it, and he was trying to keep the situation from escalating.

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              That could be. I don’t understand why Tim is tolerating the bitchiness from Mondo. In a way, I’m a bit curious as to how well Mondo is doing outside of the PR franchise-is he doing collections and selling them, and did his win of PRAS give him a boost?

            • MoHub

              I suspect Tim is less in control than Lifetime is, and TPTB there always do their utmost to make the Bravo-era PR vets look inferior to those from the Lifetime years.
              As for Mondo’s design work, he seems not to have produced anything in the way of actual garments. Rather, he’s done tee shirts and most recently launched a line of shoes for Crocs that are all about the graphic designs on the exteriors. The shoes themselves are run-of-the-mill ballet flats. So he’s mostly about painting on existing items and not about creating original shapes.

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              Thanks for the update about Mondo. I suspect you’re 100% accurate about TPTB at Lifetime, too.

      • Lilithcat

        Looks like next week is the dreaded “real woman” challenge. Instead of bitching and moaning, the designers should read this article, with particular attention to the comment by one student: “You’re a woman, not a plus-sized woman.”

        • Margaret Nikoleit

          Great article! Thanks for sharing.

        • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

          I love that! What a fantastic program.

        • Carrps

          Thanks for linking to that article. Helped to get some of the bad taste out of my mouth!

      • Frank_821

        I am surprised seeing Tim’s video recap where he says Anya and Mondo were very respectful to the other mentor relationships. But NO COMMENTS on the Asha/Natalia dynamic

        • Agnes Gooch

          And apparently that recap/talk has been removed already from the Lifetime website. I still can’t figure it out: Did the production team seriously think they were successfully spinning a Team Mondo/Anya/Asha arc this season? It would appear they did, based on how surprised and defensive the various players in this drama are behaving right now out there in real Internet time. I’m rather afraid now they’re trying to set things up for an Asha win, which would rank right up there with the Gretchen win for inciting viewer disgust.

          • guest2visits

            If the Tim recap is there I haven’t been able to find it. Not sure what making some kind a martyr of Natalia does for Asha’s rise to the top of the pile. This makes everyone look pretty bad, from Nick’s lack of support, Mondo’s and Anya’s verbal slaps, Asha’s nastiness & poor designing, Tim’s questionable behavior, and most everyone else in the workroom. (Oscar & Shan came out unscathed).
            Even though Natalia wasn’t the strongest designer there, and no doubt would’ve eliminated herself in time, THEY took that opportunity from her in the worst display of bad gamesmanship the producers could cook up, I guess. THEY made Natalia look like Cinderella after her gown got ripped to shreds by jealous step sisters to prevent her from showing up at the ball. If the facts are different than what we were shown on tv – why not show it that way? It looks to me what happened was; either the producers wanted to carry Asha further along than she deserved, or the other people on the show were simply being themselves in this challenge – the end result was the same either way.

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              I haven’t watched every episode of UTG,but my impression of Asha is that she isn’t that great a designer, and has turned out some meh or worse designs, yet she’s still there.

            • guest2visits

              To me Asha has had some very good entries, a few uninteresting ones and maybe 3 bombs (terrible designs & construction issues). Natalia has had mostly ok designs, with a couple of disasters too. Hers may not have been as intricate as others – and her work isn’t as finished as it should be; which may frustrate some designers too. In some cases I think Natalia’s designs scored better than Asha’s, and the judges seemed to appreciate her style and creativity more, and this may have also tweaked Asha against Natalia.
              Of course there’s supposed to be competition between the designers, but I think everyone knows when it goes too far. The added tangle of mentors just makes it that much more confusing or contentious since they seem to be actively working against designers themselves. This has turned out to be Survivor Show Tactics; making alliances to knock down competitors. I hate that shit. I notice how no one including me, has even mentioned the winning looks because of all this other drama. (anyway; happy for Oscar & Shan, they fulfilled the challenge nicely, though I liked the knit/macramé top and short w/ jacket more than the caftan).

            • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

              As I said above, the winning look was pure Anya.

            • guest2visits

              Dang. I totally missed it – you’re right of course. It was a pretty caftan but now all caftans smack of Anya for me.

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              I’ve watched enough seasons of PR to know that the most talented designer doesn’t necessarily win, but I still am not a fan of the Survivor tactics.

            • alyce1213

              I thought Natalia’s steam punk dress should have won that week, I thought it was ingenious and well executed. Anyway, as you said, she’s not the best designer of the bunch, and probably would have eliminated herself, but it was awful to see her get bashed by Asha, who was more responsible for the bad collection and should have gone home.

        • MoHub

          Tim has totally sold his soul to Lifetime, and I’ve watched my respect for him shrink exponentially as the Lifetime seasons of PR and its clones have progressed.

    • lundibleu

      Oh this has been a week of bad and good. Have been having a wonky week with tiredness and aches all week, and our remaining elderly cat is not having a good time at the moment. Good feedback from work, but work = tired and sore and ow. Been feeling too sore to sleep for a couple of days.

      But, then, birthday today, a day off work, nice lunch out and relaxing evening flopped at home. Lunch out with family and friends tomorrow, and day off means long weekend hurrah!

      • kimmeister

        Poor kitty!

        • lundibleu

          He had a stroke, or something similar, last October and has just been having a particularly bad (and shouty) week this week. Our other elderly cat passed away at beginning of Feb. and think he misses her a bit too.

          • alyce1213

            oh, I feel badly for your cat. Of course he misses her.
            Happy birthday to you. I love a weekend birthday.

            • lundibleu

              Thank you! He’s not very easy to deal with at times, and got himself shut in the bathroom earlier, but he can’t help it.

      • formerlyAnon

        Happy birthday! Do good things all weekend long!

    • Lilithcat

      A busy week for me, teaching at a seminar.

      Not to mention opera on Monday, and the Renée Fleming/Jonas Kaufmann recital on Wednesday. More opera and a symphony concert on Sunday. I’m positively wallowing in culture! I think I’ll go read a trashy novel.

      • Call me Bee

        Oooh what opera did you see and what opera will you see Sunday? I miss the opera.

        • Lilithcat

          I saw Mozart’s Clemenza di Tito, and will see Duke Ellington’s Queenie Pie.

          • Call me Bee

            So envious. Le sigh…..

      • Alloy Jane

        That’s what Twilight is for ;-)

        • Lilithcat

          I think it’ll be Arnold Bennett’s The Grand Babylon Hotel.

      • Jacob Bowen

        Did you SEE Renée Fleming/Jonas Kaufmann yet or is it upcoming!?!?! My professor saw it this week and I was SOOOOOOOOOOOOOO jealous.

        • Lilithcat

          This past Wednesday. It was a fabulous concert. He was particularly brilliant.

      • A Shiny O’Connor

        I’ll take one of your life, please :)

        • Lilithcat

          Here’s the formula:

          1) Live in a big city
          2) Retire
          3) Join a volunteer ushering group
          4) Bookmark Goldstar (a discount ticket program)

          • A Shiny O’Connor

            Numbers one and two are a problem ATM.

    • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

      Is one of the sets for Aladdin?

    • conniemd

      And me? I’m still trying to recover from the Joe Manganiello shots to think coherently about some other subject. If I wasn’t past menopause I’d think they were the cause of my hot flashes.

      • bitchybitchybitchy

        A hot man in a well-tailored suit is worth a bit of incoherence, I think-as long as you’re not operating heavy machinery!

    • conniemd

      It’s been a great week. My daughter and I moved out of our old house with multiple issues that was falling apart underneath it to a newly renovated much smaller apartment. I have been so eager to get up each morning and go to work. I didn’t realize how depressed I had been with our living situation and how much depression saps your energy. It’s like a total new beginning where I’m eager to get up and face the day rather than simply wanting to hide under the covers and vegetate.

      • formerlyAnon

        That is SO GREAT. I know the feeling. We get so used to just doing what has to be done, sometimes it’s hard to notice when there’s a positive change that could be made.

      • decormaven

        Wonderful news. Positive energy is a propellant. Push forward!

      • @Biting Panda

        Love this.

      • Sarah

        Yay for you!

      • conniemd

        Thanks for your kind responses. Change can be good!

    • marlie

      Happy Friday, and Happy Spring, kittens. I’m off to see the bf for the weekend. Hope everyone has a relaxing one!

    • @Biting Panda

      Shwew. Just getting home from dinner and the world’s best organic margaritas. My dad and stepmom came to town for the weekend. So it will be that weird mix of fun yet slightly annoying.

      My Pursuit of Happiness course started this week, I’m looking forward to taking care of our first assignments.

      And I picked up the S1 DVDs of Orphan Black. I think Sunday should be rainy enough to justify a binge watch.

      XoXo Kittens
      a-

      • decormaven

        What’s an organic margarita? I assume it doesn’t involve a premixed material. A friend has a Margaritaville blender- great for frozen ‘ritas.

        • @Biting Panda

          ‘zactly.

    • GinnyThePainter

      10 days ago, I had to have my beautiful 1 yr old pup put to sleep due to aggression. It was very sad, and the only upside was watching my old girl, my dowager countess dog, run around the house giving everyone high fives, gleeful about surviving another male. Bitch.

      Then today I decided to take my dowager countess dog out with me to do errands, and as she’s jumping into the backseat, she sees the pup’s old collar and leash. I forgot to put it away after returning from the vet’s. And she kind of just looked at me as if to say, “No, seriously, where are you REALLY taking me?”

      • Pennymac

        Thats awful, GTP. Condolences.

      • Fordzo a.k.a. Fancy Mukluks

        I’m sorry about your dog.

        If you’re lonely for another pooch, I have a half-Chihuahua, half-cat I’ll let you take.

        • GinnyThePainter

          Who couldn’t use a half-Chihuahua, half-cat designer pet? But I promised the Countess, a big dog who has outlived most of her littermates, that she will be allowed to live out the rest of her days in peace. No more awful boys.

          • Fordzo a.k.a. Fancy Mukluks

            Yeah, he’s an awful boy, alright. I wish the cats would kill him.

      • Trickytrisha

        You won’t like reading my comment, but I find it very disturbing that you felt you had to put down your dog. I don’t know the circumstances, but I’m hoping that you made every possible effort to correct the behaviors that were the problem. Re-homing might have been possible, anything to keep from killing an innocent animal, even if it is troubled.

        • GinnyThePainter

          We made attempts to rehome him, but there aren’t a preponderance of homes ready to take in an aggressive dog, especially a large breed who became very dangerous very quickly even though he was young, healthy & neutered. It was a brutal decision, but I knew he’d bite again, and I couldn’t live with myself if he hurt anyone. I used to think only mean people raised mean dogs, but I know better now.

          • demidaemon

            It’s a hard decision to make, no matter what the reason. We had a dog like that way back, who bit both of our neighbors and me. Unfortunately, despite it all, we aren’t all Cesar Milan nor can we afford to hire him to help us. I feel for you.

          • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

            I’ve known a couple of dogs (spaniels) with rage syndrome – sometimes there really is no other solution. It is tragic.

      • MilaXX

        so sorry about the pup

      • formerlyAnon

        Oh, sad for you. But gold star for sucking it up and making the decision.

        And the dowager countess dog story made me smile.

      • bitchybitchybitchy

        I’m sorry about the pup. One of our nephews had to make the same decison about his rescue dog a few years ago. He and his parents, who happily dogsat the dog loved Otto, but after Otto bit two members of the family and one had to have stitches, our nephew contacted the rescue organization and talked about the aggression issue before making the decision to have his dog euthanized. It was sad.

      • conniemd

        So sad. Some dogs just can’t be made whole, be it their own nature or horrible owners. It feels like it’s your failure. Feel for you.

    • Fordzo a.k.a. Fancy Mukluks

      Will someone please tell me how this new version of Disqus works? I just want to see my dashboard.

      I had a lousy week with visiting relatives, who I am afraid saw my user name here and will now know when I’m talking about them.

      There was a full moon, which means that every single body at work was CrAzY for about 72 hours. One very sweet lass pulled her pants AND Depends down in front of me because her shirt was bothering her (I’m still not sure what getting nekkid from the waist down had to do with fixing her shirt, but sometimes the answer is that there IS no answer, and once we got her pants back up where they belonged, she was fine and happy and said, “Thank you. Sweet dreams!” and went off to lunch). A man told me that all his pills were “lost in the covers” because he takes his meds in bed and sometimes he misses his mouth and couldn’t I just give him some fresh ones?

      I’m hoping it’s just spring fever and we’ll all be back to our normal selves when we can get outside and take in some sunshine and fresh air.

      • Pennymac

        Click on the disqus banner and then click on the “Me” tab. I hate it….

        • Fordzo a.k.a. Fancy Mukluks

          I did! But that only shows me my comments. I can’t see replies WITH the comments. Replies are under their own category now, and I find it all vexing.

          Plus, I had to follow a category in order to GET to the new, confusing non-dashboard. Like they were holding my dashboard hostage until I agreed! *Le sigh* First world problems.

          • @Biting Panda

            Try People tab

      • MilaXX

        It is evil & I hate it. It wants you to follow channel or trends and all I want is to see if I have received replies. Diqus sent a feedback questionnaire and I wrote how overly complicated they had made it. I’ve given up, so if I miss a reply from a fellow BK I apologize in advance.

        • @Biting Panda

          Ditto!

        • Sarah

          I KNOW. WTF don’t force me to follow things I DON’T LIKE.

        • Fordzo a.k.a. Fancy Mukluks

          What really pisses me off (pardon my French) is that I had to follow a “community” before I could proceed to my own settings, and now every time I open Disqus I’m greeted by enormous headlines (honestly, I feel like I’m being shouted at) that say things like “EVERY WOMAN SHOULD TRY PORN ONCE”!!

          • Sarah

            Yes, I did that too. I must’ve followed something else to get through, because I haven’t seen that particular headline, but it is SUPER obnoxious.

          • MilaXX

            Yup, which is what made me give up on Disqus. I’m not following a community in order to get to the content I actually do want to see.

      • Lilithcat

        I have loathed Disqus from the very beginning.

        • bitchybitchybitchy

          come sit here by me(pats virtual couch with bottle of wine nearby).

          • SierraDelta

            And some excellent cheese and some superior crackers?

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              We’ll set up a good sectional sofa with an attractive yet functional coffee table and all the goodies!

    • Jacob Bowen

      2 thoughts for tonight. First: My mother is like a magpie with her clothing choices. Every single top she owns is somewhat bedazzled. But she’s 60+ and looking cute so I go with it…but every time she asks if I like her new top I have to be her good gay son and say “Mom, it’s cute, but it’s just like the rest of them. It follows the formula.” The formula is “Bedazzled semi-revealing neckline+crazy pattern mixing=It’s in your closet” We tested this formula, it’s 85% correct.

      #2 was something I typed out and figured out on my own. All I’ll say is I HATE my sister’s ex, and I HATE the codependency that some young girls believe is necessary to be happy.

      • kimmeister

        Well it’s good that her ex isn’t her current then! I was just bemoaning the same topic with my stylist/ friend today regarding a fellow acquaintance who keeps sticking with her physically abusive husband. Ugh.

        • Jacob Bowen

          “ex” is a relative term. He was at my house for 4 hours Friday, luckily she’s on choir tour for spring break.

          • formerlyAnon

            Ick.

      • bitchybitchybitchy

        Our dear, dear niece (also our goddaughter) had an awful boyfriend, and it took some serious nastiness on his part before she got herself out of the relationship; her parents and extended family were so relieved when she did. The ex did leave a lasting reminder in the form of our absolutely adorable great/grandniece-the only good thing the creep did.

    • formerlyAnon

      It’s been a hard working week but with plenty of opportunities for fun, so I am biting my tongue on the whining. Especially since several of my friends have had shitty things happening in their lives. One of them so relentlessly shitty that *I’m* getting disaster fatigue, and starting to worry what two solid years of anxiety, frustration and unfairness is going to do to her.

      GIrl child back for a few days visit, that’s nice. My subconscious tried to force me to worry about money (no doubt because I did my taxes), but I refused. Saw a lot of slam poetry. Great performers, many, but not *nearly* so many great writers. I try not to be overly judgmental. And I fail.

      I’ll catch up with y’all’s doings tomorrow.

      • decormaven

        It’s been a tough year for a dear friend of mine. Things finally starting rolling in the right direction. You’re a good friend to stay constant in her life. Judging is part of slam poetry, so not to worry. Just keep looking for the nuggets out there.

      • @Biting Panda

        My very best friend is kind, funny, generous and a truly good person. Her shit stays sideways. Family shit, unemployment shit, health shit, it never seems to stop coming after her. I too worry about her and want the universe to stop fucking with my friend.

      • Sarah

        I am used to being the friend that is consistently fine, and always “there” for everyone else. I recently found out that it seems everyone is worried about ME. I am trying hard not to feel terrible about that, but perspective is everything. Takeaway: just take care of yourself and that’ll make it easier to be there for others.

        • formerlyAnon

          Thanks for the kind words. Don’t feel terrible because people are concerned for you, it’s kind of a testament to your lovableness – or at least likability, yes? Sending the ‘take care of yourself” right back to you.

        • conniemd

          Wow that is so true of me. I’m always the fine one and yet people worry about me. It’s surprising.

          • SierraDelta

            Can I just say that I love you all?

    • A Shiny O’Connor

      Late comer to the lounge on GMT AM.

      Another thundering bitch of a week chez Shiny. So glad to see the back of it.

      Woke up this morning still hoping that Trashageddon didn’t happen and Vogue did not jump the shark. Pint of Lavazza required.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

        Excellent choice of coffee!

        • A Shiny O’Connor

          Two for one at Tesco – stockpiled ;)

          • formerlyAnon

            Living well is the best revenge.

            I seem to be repeating that a lot, lately.

          • Jacob Bowen

            I LOVE Tesco! The first time I went to Tesco and got £3 wine I was SOLD.

            • formerlyAnon

              I just want to note that I greatly respect anyone not posting from the UK (and I could be wrong, but my impression is you are not) who bothers to use the symbol for pounds rather than spelling it out. That is having editorial standards!

            • Jacob Bowen

              You’re correct, I’m not from the UK, but my uncle is and he actually said to me a few years ago that he is annoyed that people use the $ symbol but not the £ symbol. Plus, it’s easy cause the iPad had it built into the keyboard.

      • demidaemon

        Trashageddon?

        • A Shiny O’Connor

          Kim K x Vogue

          • demidaemon

            That’s what I thought. Put in that format, it reminds me of horrible fanfiction. Not a stretch of an analogy, that’s for sure.

    • Sarah

      This week has been nice for me! By virtue of a very large roast and a mate who doesn’t like to eat after he’s been working in a kitchen all day, I was able to eat corned beef, cabbage, and potatoes for not one but THREE dinners this week. ‘Tis my favorite meal of all time, so yesss. Said mate is also very good at bringing home amazing bunches of flowers at the most random times, but this week we went out for drinks on Tuesday with some friends, and I got slammed with ladytime cramps SO HARD that I fainted in the restroom. He had to walk me very gingerly home after a quick exit so that I could lay around & moan until meds started working. I was afraid I pissed him off (they were his friends) but he brought me the most glorious flowers of all time Wednesday after work, and they made me feel like the queen of the world. Also, he got me Frozen to watch last night, and we did, and both hated it. Which was kind of fun.
      Also: I FOUND THE CLASS!!!! I am gonna graduate this September after all!!! I am sickeningly excited. The END is in SIGHT!!

      • formerlyAnon

        CLASS!!!! Hot damn. SUCCESS!!!

        Also, your man sounds pretty awesome.

        • Sarah

          Well, you don’t hear about the bad stuff here. But, it’s not really “bad stuff” – just your normal relationship frustrations. After being a mistress to a Complete Asshole for 13 years (no, they never do leave their wife) and having a series of extremely non-committed pairings before that, someone who is kind, funny, handsome, cares about me and not my body/money/lack thereof, and whom I don’t have to conceal from my family is worth bragging about, in my book. We are two peas in a very specific subcultural pod, and I couldn’t be happier, even if he does like to bet on sports and play video games ALL the TIME.

          • formerlyAnon

            My mother, whose ideas of a suitable mate were completely UNhelpful and wrong-headed when it came to specifics, did lay down one extremely useful guiding principal (which she may have gotten from Dear Abby, but whatever!):

            Does he make your life better or worse?

            and its corollary: Even if he never changes, will he make your life better or worse over time?

            As long as on balance it’s “better,” the details totally don’t matter.

            • Sarah

              My mom said “you’ll know.” Which is difficult advice – you THINK you know in the throes of first blush, but then you’re wrong. I did know, it turns out, with this one. From the moment we met, actually, even though he was married and I was with someone else, too. Lucky for us both neither thing worked out, and we got together. Mom also said “you’d better have something to talk about because you can’t have sex for 45 years.” She was right about that :)

            • formerlyAnon

              I’m not so sure about “you’ll know,” but man was she right about the second thing!

            • @Biting Panda

              Truth.

            • @Biting Panda

              I hate to nay say your mom, but “you’ll know” is often a method that is easily compromised by powerful shit. And “knowing” is extremely circumstantial.

            • Sarah

              Yup. I know it. And funny, considering she “knew” my dad was the one, but he proceeded to become a hardcore abusive alcoholic and make the last two decades of her life before she died young from stress highly unpleasant. More like “you’ll know you’re in deep if you are willing to ignore all signs you shouldn’t be.”

            • @Biting Panda

              I’m sorry she had went through that, sorrier still that you had to be party to it. But glad that there are the lessons you’ll take from it that will serve you in life, in love, and maybe one day, in parenthood.

            • Sarah

              Water under the bridge, and yes, I’m glad about that, too. Best takeaway from a poor parent is knowing what not to do. And in the end, instead of drinking himself to death like we all expected him to, dad actually joined AA. Too late for it to be any help for mom, but now he’s sober, and trying in his inept way to suck a little less. He still does, because leopards don’t change their spots, but it’s more than we hoped for, and I am at least proud of that for him.

            • formerlyAnon

              You really should pat yourself on the back for being able to write this post. Nobody but you knows how hard it was to get to where you are, so nobody else can really congratulate you for it properly!

            • decormaven

              Amen to that.

            • OffToSeeHim

              God, this just could NOT be truer. My dad was the worst parent on the planet, and my step-daughter’s mother was the second worst. When I had my own children, these two evil little angels were on my shoulder every day once I had my own kids, my mantra every day was, “Did I do or say anything today that either of them would have ever done or said?” If I thought I did, I’d wake my kids up even if it was midnight and apologize. I might have relaxed a little over the past 17 years, but I have great relationships with my children that I attribute directly to those two and their examples of how NEVER to treat kids.

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              Amazing. Bringing that sort of insight into your parenting is a fantastic gift!

            • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

              My mum’s advice was “don’t date Slavs”. So not helpful.

            • formerlyAnon

              I got “It’s just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor one.”

              In my head: Thanks mom, for the news flash.

              Aloud: “Oh, and how does that apply to you and Dad?”

              She’d say: “I know your father didn’t have any money when we got married, but he had PROSPECTS. And it turned out well.”

      • @Biting Panda

        So much goodness in that post. I’m so happy for you.

        • Sarah

          Thanks! I am waiting for my advisor’s approval on the class and she’s taking too long, but I don’t see why my school wouldn’t take the credit, so I’ve never been so excited for a summer school class before!

          • demidaemon

            She should approve it, just because you’re you, and because it’s been a bitch to find one that will work.

            • Sarah

              Aww, thanks. REALLY. AND because it’s her fault I had to do this in the first place, after assuring me I could easily take it nearby and being wrong about that, and then not offering me any assistance in finding the damned requirement anywhere else. Like, I’m writing my thesis, and I would have preferred not to be constantly trolling the web for summer courses online offering history of the damned Renaissance. Unfortunately I think she has to ask the head of the department, but she’s an art history prof too so hopefully she can sway them on my behalf if they’re not sure.

            • demidaemon

              All of this is making me really appreciate the limited requirements of my PhD program. Good luck!

            • Sarah

              Thanks buddy!

            • bitchybitchybitchy

              I hope that approval comes through sooner rather than later.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

        YOU FOUND THE CLASS! Hurrah! That is fantastic news!

        I’ve had an IUD so long I’d forgotten about that fainting with cramps shit. God I don’t miss it!

        • Sarah

          I just quit taking the pill a few months back, and it is getting worse every month. I feel like a damned teenager. But, I has reasons for it, so it is as it must be.

          • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

            Well yes. And with a bit of luck you’ll get a 9 month break from all that pretty soon! My mum reckoned she didn’t get cramps any more after she’d been pregnant, but I don’t know if that is a common experience.

    • GeoDiva

      Hanging out in Taipei for my birthday on Sunday and then back to reality in Monday.

      • formerlyAnon

        You cannot imagine how exotic “hanging out in Taipei” sounds from the other side of the world!

        Hope you get to do a full day of fun big city things!

      • OffToSeeHim

        I’m going to start working “Hanging out in Taipei” into casual conversation to make me sound cooler.

    • KendraMR

      I’m enjoying my 25th birthday today.

      • Sarah

        Happy Birthday!

      • Swiftlytiltingplanet

        Happy! to you!

      • formerlyAnon

        Happy Birthday!

      • conniemd

        Cool. I hope you something fun and energizing today.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

        Happy Birthday!

      • Jacob Bowen

        Happy Birthday!

      • SierraDelta

        Happy Birthday, infant!

    • mcbishop

      I hate to be a downer, but……my mother’s 79 year old cousin (mine as well, I guess you get), was shot to death in his home by a deranged creep with semi-automatic weapons this last Tuesday night, in our civilized little Eugene, Oregon. The *person* set his house on fire, hijacked a car, and drove to CA where he shot at one civilian and killed a police officer before being killed himself. My cousin was a retired University advisor, a widely respected scholar of Pacific Northwest Indian history (he was one, and with his death, so died his experience and scholarship), a peaceful, graceful, humorous man. Meaning, accomplishment and light, extinguished in a bloody moment by a scumbag with a gun. What a world.

      • Swiftlytiltingplanet

        I am so sorry.

        I am, however, always pleased when deranged creeps do the world a favor and kill themselves. (Which does, I know, go against all my liberal leanings, but I don’t care.) I really don’t care about their horrible childhoods and lives and why it wasn’t really their fault.

        • formerlyAnon

          I see nothing inconsistent with having liberal biases and being o.k. when broken, probably un-fixable people who do great harm decide to kill themselves. It’s for the good of the herd.

        • mcbishop

          Well, this one didn’t kill himself, it turns out. He was wearing body armor (which was discovered in his car, with semi-automatic weapons and methamphetamine), when he was arrested in our town March 6. They decided that they couldn’t hold him for some reason (me, I would have assumed that someone with both weapons and body armor might be planning to shoot at someone who could shoot back–a cop maybe??–but that’s just me.) I wonder if that same body armor was what allowed him to kill that poor officer. The second policeman killed him.

          It’s kind of how I feel about the death penalty, I’m afraid: anyone who thinks it will bring them satisfaction or closure is probably wrong. I just think he got off easy. It’s not helping the grief and angst of worrying about George and his last moments. Thanks for listening.

          • Swiftlytiltingplanet

            I’m also fine with a cop killing him. It doesn’t bring me satisfaction in any way. I see it as saving the community the time and trouble and pain of having to deal with him – as well as not extending the ordeal for your family.

            Nothing will make the grief and the anger easier but time.

            I am so, so, sorry.

            • mcbishop

              Thank you. I do appreciate it. And I get the sentiment; the world is surely better off without this monstrous person. Wish it could have happened before……

          • formerlyAnon

            Well, now I can add that I’m sorry for the cop who killed him. Even if s/he doesn’t have to undergo painful and under-informed public scrutiny, if s/he’s still a functioning human under the mental/emotional cop-armour they grow, that’s not a good feeling, even if they know they did the right thing.

            (Don’t get me wrong. I’m all for public scrutiny of use of force by law enforcement – just because I’m related to law enforcement doesn’t mean I don’t know that abuses take place, poor training takes place, human error takes place, shitty people exist, callousness exists. Accountability is the only way to correct for institutional self-protectiveness and the failings of human nature. But OTOH, semi-informed press and uninformed people can create a climate which is hard on someone who’s trying to do a difficult and dangerous job – and, more to the point, a climate that just reinforces whatever fortress/siege mentality that the institution already has, and everything just gets worse.)

            • mcbishop

              Yes, I totally agree. In this case, this officer was part of a chase and manhunt for this guy, and he heard shots and came across the dead officer, who had been essentially ambushed. The criminal shot at him and he returned fire and, it turned out, killed him. It’s not only the stress and pain of having to kill someone himself, but having found his colleague…..I can’t imagine what police officers, and their families, go through.

              My quarrel with our local law enforcement on this is pretty much with our DA’s office. I would like to know who they kept in jail on March 6, and how they were so much more obviously dangerous to the community than a guy with an AR-15, body armor, and meth.

        • MoHub

          But they just need to kill themselves before they turn their weapons on other people.

      • Sarah

        That is horrible and I cannot express to you enough how sorry I am for your family and your community to have been put through such pain. Please remember that people do care, they really do – regardless of what one wayward soul has done.

        • mcbishop

          Thank you. I’m feeling a need to tell about it, I guess partly because I want people to know that this lovely man was among us. I’ve been pretty vocal about my opposition to assault weapons–really, any guns– being so easily obtained by literally ANYONE…..it’s staggering to have it hit your own family.

          • Sarah

            I am sure. And I am vocal too. I will continue to be for your sake, and everyone else. You absolutely should do all you can to make sure everyone knows exactly how wonderful your cousin was, and thank you for telling us about him. He deserved to go on in his own time, and not like that.

          • decormaven

            Tell the story, and tell it often. It cannot be told enough.

          • OffToSeeHim

            I’m close to Raleigh, NC – a seventeen year old boy in my daughter’s high school bought a gun at Dick’s Sporting Goods and shot himself in the parking lot a couple of weeks ago. You can buy a gun at Dick’s Sporting Goods powerful enough to kill a person with. WTF? I ask myself over and over, how can this be? To see my daughter in pain over this just makes me want to go out and start collecting all the guns myself.

          • SierraDelta

            Bearing witness is powerful, and you will never know whose life you may have saved. Peace be with you.

      • formerlyAnon

        Condolences. That’s shitty and a hard loss.

        • mcbishop

          Thanks. It’s just not something you ever expect to have to deal with. Our family is kind of reeling.

      • bitchybitchybitchy

        I’m so sorry. a dreadful, dreadful tragedy for your family and community.

        • mcbishop

          Thank you.

      • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

        Words can’t express how sorry I am to hear this.

        • mcbishop

          I appreciate that. Thank you.

      • @Biting Panda

        Things like this make the universe hard to understand. It’s hard and it’s beyond unfair. We can only offer our love, condolences, and peaceful thoughts.

        • mcbishop

          Thank you.

      • decormaven

        Oh, that is painful to be sure. Hold fast to the good thoughts of your cousin. They will serve you well.

        • mcbishop

          thank you….he was surely one of a kind.

      • MilaXX

        How Horrible! My condolences to you and your family.

        • mcbishop

          Thank you.

      • OffToSeeHim

        I’m terribly sorry. How is your mother doing? Sometimes I think older people handle this stuff better because their life experience gives them a context we lack (even at my advancing age of 46.) But then, sometimes they just seem so frail. I hope you guys are okay.

        • mcbishop

          Thanks, that’s really sweet. My mom is a strong 82, but this has devastated her. She lived only a few blocks from him, (grew up with him, and felt as close to her cousins as siblings), and actually saw the news before she heard it from anyone. Drove up to his house, saw the burnt house and crime tape, and the police sat her down and told her the news. I think that’s the worst of this–my mother, his sister, all these older relatives who have endured enough sorrows for a lifetime, having to deal with this grief and horror at his stage. It’s nice of you to ask.

      • conniemd

        Oh so sorry. I did go to University of Oregon and Eugene is a great town, so shocking when it happens somewhere unexpected like that. Back in 1980 there was a terrible killing of two children in Ashland a block away from my old home and it really upset my mother.

        • mcbishop

          Yes, so you know Eugene. That kind of thing just doesn’t seem right, here. Too close to home, too awful, too random. Too much.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

        Oh god. I am so sorry! At 79 (at any age) you deserve better than that. What a waste of his life and knowledge, what a waste of indigenous experience.

        • mcbishop

          Just an unbelievable loss. He was so special.

          • guest2visits

            I’m so sorry for your loss. This is indeed a very incomprehensible event. I did visit the University of Oregon site where they speak so well of your cousin, and have a very sweet photo of him posted, too.

            • mcbishop

              That’s really nice. Thank you so much. I have always been proud to call him my cousin…..

    • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

      I’m having a glass of wine along with the two of you. The partner and I are fully moved into our new digs. It’s nice and quiet. The kitchen is to die. And the neighbors are friendly. The neighborhood itself is an interesting melting pot of cultures: Asian, Latino, Somalian, Black, White so I’m enjoying the diversity and all the fun little shops and restaurants in the area.

      It’s so good to get out of our old living situation. I seriously feel like a soldier dealing with PTSD after years of battle. Although, I will have to grow accustom to the commute. I had a 25 minute walk one way to work everyday which I loved. Now it’s a 25 minute commute one way on the light rail. At least our building has a workout room so I see a lot of elliptical and treadmill workouts in my future to make up for my walking commute.

      • Sarah

        Congrats on the new place! Sounds nice. I love my neighborhood for it’s diversity, too. So many tasty foods….shoot. I wish I had an elliptical in MY basement. I usually just count walking to and from the food as exercise, but methinks that might cancel itself out after a huge plate of butter chicken.

      • decormaven

        Oh, so good to hear the new place is suiting you two. The former place was toxic- this sounds much more your cuppa tea.

      • MilaXX

        Sounds like it was mostly a win for you two. Happy to hear things worked out. I had one experience with neighbors from hell in my life and I have to say it was one time too many.

      • OffToSeeHim

        For those that don’t get on much but are terminally nosy, would you mind sharing what was so bad about the old place? Our neighbor in our last house was just awful. I loved our house, but leaving it was made a little easier by the fact that we were also leaving him.

        • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

          It’s a long story – six years’ worth. I’ll give you the Cliffs Notes version.

          I lived in a really cool, old mid-century modern apartment building for fourteen years: ten units – five downstairs with small backyards and five upstairs with balconies. We lived in a downstairs end unit so we onlyhad neighbors next door to us on one side and above us.

          Six years ago an interracial gay couple in their early 50s moved in next door. Since the partner and I
          are also an interracial gay couple they made an aggressively concerted effort to befriend us which we didn’t reciprocate so they took it personally. If you’ve ever seen the movie Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolfe? it was like living next door to George and Martha which is why we graciously declined their attempts at friendship.

          They became fast friends with the girl who lived above us and with a married couple who lived two doors down (who we nicknamed Sunshine, Nick and Honey respectively). On a daily basis, if George and Martha weren’t having drunken raging fights (one culminated with one of them kicking in their front door) then they were having drunken raging parties into the early morning with Sunshine, Nick and Honey. Their attitude towards us was if we didn’t want to be friends then they weren’t going to be considerate
          neighbors. It was an old building with very, very thin walls so, for six years, there was never a moment of silence longer than two hours in our apartment.

          I made a few vain attempts of leaving George and Martha notes asking if they could lower the volume of their festivities on weeknights which emboldened their behavior. Finally, I went next door and asked them face-to-face only to have George tell me with drawn fists that “It is what it is, so fuck off.” Seriously.
          So I backed off and began to lodge my complaints with building management since it was impossible to resolve the issue with them directly.

          The partner and I discovered that other tenants complained to building management as well and in fact one tenant not only complained about George and Martha but also about Sunshine, Nick and Honey. So Sunshine, Nick and Honey assumed the partner and I ratted them out. Suddenly we find ourselves surrounded above us and next door to us by angry neighbors who dislike us. We’re flummoxed because
          we aren’t the inconsiderate individuals in the situation yet they’re the individuals who are angry.

          Last month it came to a head when Sunshine decides to build a gerry rigged extension to their balcony directly above our living room windows. It completely blocked direct sunlight from coming into our apartment and they decide to crazily perch their propane burning barbeque grill on top of it. So, I foolishly knocked on her door, explained the situation to Sunshine, and asked if it was a temporary arrangement. She begins to scream at me: “What the hell! Everyone in the building hates you! Fuck you! I’m not moving it!” Again, I backed off and realized that the situation had reached a point where there was the very real potential for violence towards us.

          Bear in mind this is just the tip of the iceberg. There is six years’ worth of increasingly hostile passive aggressive behavior directed towards us from these five individuals. If I went into greater detail it would be the length of a novella.

          The partner and I agreed that our quality of life and peace of mind were much more important than staying in an apartment that we loved. So I explained the circumstances to building management who agreed to release us from our lease penalty-free. Fortunately, he completely understood the situation and was really apologetic that it had to come to us leaving. He gave us a stellar reference for our new place and assured us he would handle the neighbor situation after we leave (a lot of good that does us) so that there is no danger of retaliation while we still lived there.

          Our new place is divine, but we’re more annoyed by the circumstances that caused us to move than the actual move.

          • OffToSeeHim

            Actually, I saw the long response too. It’s amazing how some people never get out of fifth grade. The fact that adulthood gives them time and money to ratchet up the hostility makes them dangerous. Did your landlord ever actually do anything once you moved? Or was that just talk?

            I’m really sorry. Last year I moved out of a home I had loved for 18 years and planned to grow old in. I left a pretty little town that I had been in or near my whole life, and left all my friends and family behind. I moved somewhere very different, where I didn’t know anybody. It was devastating for all of us.

            But I’m slowly getting acclimated, and I’m finding that I’m really happy here. And now we’re looking for a house and I’m surprised to find that I’m really excited. It’s like I’m sad until I stop thinking about it, and then I realize I’m actually happy. I hope you and your partner will be so happy in your new home. You have each other, it turns out that’s the important thing.

            • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

              We have the apartment until the 31st. Each time we’ve gone back to pick up some items we still have over there nothing has changed. I seriously think we’re getting lip service now that the landlord knows we’re leaving, and I doubt he’ll do anything unless the next tenant complains. To his credit, he did at least address the complaints when we lived there but it took so long for the wheels to be set in motion that it became emotionally exhausting. It took over a year of complaints before the next door neighbors finally toned down their behavior.
              We’re both really happy in the new place. It’s like a dark storm cloud has been lifted. I hope you guys find the perfect home to buy and are happy there for many years to come.

      • conniemd

        We both posted the joy we are getting out of our new digs. Different strokes though, I was wayy out in the country with few neighbors and a 25 minute commute by car. Now, I’m just a few blocks from downtown. My neighborhood is diverse too. Lots of hispanics have moved into the neighborhood, as well as young professionals, so it’s a mixed bag of older places and newly renovated. I’m so excited, there is a Mexican grocery store and restaurant just across the street and they have difficult to find ingredients and I love cooking Mexican. Since I lived in California for years I’m very used to a Mexican culture and moving to NE Pennsylvania in the 1980’s I was totally frustrated initially by not being able to buy fresh corn tacos.

        • formerlyAnon

          That sounds wonderful. My neighborhood is gentrifying and it’s a mixed blessing. We’re losing most of the mom & pop ethnic restaurants and groceries. Getting some good mid-priced places and specialty retail. I am not reconciled.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

        Moving is such a pain. I’m glad you are settled and feeling the relief! Now find yourself something good to read on that commute!

        • http://batman-news.com boweryboy

          I’ve started reading 1Q84 again. I figure 25 minutes on a train each way will force me to finish it. I’ve been reading it off and on for almost two years now!

    • Laylalola

      There are all sorts of fashion-world developments making the news — L’Wren Scott’s suicide, Anna Wintour putting Kanye West and Kim Kardashian on the cover of Vogue — and it’s weird that there’s no in-depth discussion and analysis of it here. I understand nobody can do everything and maybe TLo never would want to go into those areas anyway, still, I’m just saying, it’s been a noticeable hole.

      • MilaXX

        If you follow them on twitter you see how T & Lo feel about both those things.

      • Trickytrisha

        Pretty sure Anna W. just lost credibility, respect, and authenticity. However, I’m pretty sure she’s selling lots of magazines to people who aren’t her usual base. Money talks. Selling out isn’t pretty.

      • Sarah

        There’s a conversation about Vogue in this thread, actually.

      • MilaXX

        Fig girls made a post about it.

      • bitchybitchybitchy

        I’m not that surprised by the Vogue cover for Kanye and Kim Kardashian. Vogue’s been putting celebrities from different fields on the cover for quite some time.

        • MilaXX

          I think more people take issue with Kim being on the cover than Kanye. Kanye may be a loud mouth, but he is a talented musician. Kim on the other hand has no real talent outside of who she is dating and the clothes she wears. Also for year Anna swore she never put a reality star on the cover of Vogue.

          • bitchybitchybitchy

            I didn’t know that Wintour had said that about not using reality stars for cover shoots. I suppose in this case if AW wanted Kanye, she ended up with a twofer.
            Personally I don’t understand the public interest in the Kardashians-yes, they work hard to promote themselves, but I don’t see any talent aside from that of self-promotion. OK, I’ll step off the soapbox!

    • Jacob Bowen

      I got sufficiently hammered last night, maybe the worst in my entire life, and after 4 hours of sleep, a trip to Sonic, and a 3 hour car ride home I am sober. I think it was my “reset” button for the year so far.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ Alicia

        Sometimes it is what you need.