Oscars 2014 Pairs Division: Matthew McConaughey and Camila Alves

Posted on March 03, 2014

Despite all the respectability in the world raining down on them…

 

Matthew McConaughey and Camila Alves attends the 86th Annual Academy Awards held at the Dolby theater in Hollywood, California. Matthew is wearing a Dolce&Gabbana tuxedo paired with Christian Louboutin shoes. Camila is wearing a Gabriela Cadena gown accessorized with Lorraine Schwartz jewels.

…they still come off a little crazy. Just a bit. Come on. It’s time to say it. Okay, maybe not crazy, but a bit on the, shall we say, wild side.  They’re that couple down the street that everyone in the neighborhood swears has a sex dungeon. You can dress them up, but it always feels like they can’t wait to get home, put on their sexy undies and rub oil all over each other.

We give them both a lot of credit, though. They’ve taken their naturally glitzy (tacky) style tendencies and tweaked them just enough toward respectability for awards season. She’s wearing a drag gown – and we wouldn’t have it any other way. We’re honestly surprised she isn’t wearing a scandalous amount of borrowed diamonds. We would have pegged her for the type to mix a little Liz Taylor into her drag. This is tasteful drag and it’s absolutely dead perfect for her.

As for him, we admit it: we’re disappointed. We wanted him to stay as unconventional in his style choices as he’s been all through this poledance. Instead, he opted for the white jacket, which only managed to link him to Ryan Seacrest AND make him look inferior to Jared Leto, who pulled it off better. It’s an okay look, but we would’ve been happier if he’d worn a metallic vest or something. We wouldn’t have called it tasteful, but we’d have recognized it for being truer to his style. And those pants need a bit of a hemming.

His performance in Dallas Buyers Club was jaw-droppingly good and shockingly off-model for him. He absolutely deserved the Oscar and he deserves every bit of kudos for managing a masterful, possibly legendary, career turnaround. But that speech was obnoxious, no?

 

And if you’re loving our Oscars red carpet bitchery, you might consider checking out our new book, darling! “A hilarious critique of celebrity culture,” they called it! We’re proud. And shameless. 

 

 

 

 

[Photo Credit: Jennifer Graylock/INFphoto.com, INFphoto.com]

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