Solange Knowles at the Miu Miu Women’s Tales 7th Edition Event

Posted on February 13, 2014

Ah, now we get it. This is the party where all the invitees were asked to dress a little crazy, then.

 

 

Solange Knowles attends Miu Miu Women’s Tales 7th Edition – “Spark & Light” Screening – at Diamond Horseshoe in New York City in a Carven dress.

Carven Resort 2014 Collection

 

Which, granted, is pretty much the Miu Miu motto: Let’s All Dress Crazy.  But is it a slap to dress in some other designer’s crazy for a Miu Miu party? We wonder.

Regardless, it’s kind of an awful dress. The bust is designed to make breasts look ugly, the color does absolutely nothing for her and we just want to dip a napkin in the nearest glass of water and start wiping down her eyelids because they are a fright.

Go home and start over, girl.

P.S.: We saw her sitting front row  at NYFW this week and neither of us realized who she was until later. We both assumed she was a model. She honestly doesn’t photograph all that well, considering how beautiful she is in person.

 

 

[Photo Credit: Bryan Bedder/Getty Images, style.com]

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  • Rand Ortega

    The hair is freakin’ fabulous, tho. The rest is just straight clowney.

  • CommenterFormerlyKnownAsR

    AIEEE!! is my well-thought-out comment.

  • Karen Belgrad

    Apparently her invite was to spend “one short day in the Emerald City”

    • sojourneryouth

      Yes. More specifically, the Emerald City from The Wiz!

  • marlie

    Solange’s makeup is terrible, and I can’t imagine how she’s able to move her arms in that dress. I like the color, but everything in the bodice of the dress is horribly unflattering. And I hate the Barbie shoes with this.

    • Trent

      Co-sign 100%. It looks like a prom dress in Oz. A rare misstep from one of my fashion faves.

  • Shawn EH

    Love the shoe color. Don’t mind the rest, I’ve listened to her album, I go to Solange for crazy!

  • MilaXX

    I know this is weird, but I don’t hate the dress. I do hate the shoes and makeup. Did her MUA get snowed in and she decided to try her hand at painting her own face? That’s some 5th grade playing in mommy’s makeup level stuff.

    • mjude

      if it was a better fabric do you think the dress would be better? I don’t mind the dress either. as for the makeup…LOL

      • MilaXX

        I actually like the dress as is. I just dislike pretty much everything else.

        • demidaemon

          I don’t know. I think their is some awfully bad seaming in the bodice that draws your eye away from possibly salvageable design details.

          Though I do love her chutzpah for not wearing Miu Miu to a clearly Miu Miu hosted and sponsored event.

    • kirkyo

      I don’t hate it either, but I do hate the bottom half of the sleeves.

  • KinoEye

    I love her hair, but the rest of this says mid-sized city chamber of commerce banquet in 1986.

  • colleenjanel

    “Girl, we’re running late. Let me slap some REALLY BRIGHT eyeshadow on you, and maybe no one will notice that we didn’t have time to do anything else.”

    • Jessica Freeman

      Oh nothing is taking away from the fact that she looks like a green light.

  • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

    Green Satin Mono-boob is ALL I can see.

    • Pennymac

      With Pepto-Bismol Payless shoes. So wrong.

  • MaggieMae

    I’m not loving the fuller eyebrows on Ms. Solange, nor her make-up, nor what that dress is doing to her bust. I am disappoint.

  • @Biting Panda

    We’ve been iced in for days now, my little girl is terribly bored. This morning she came out of her room in looking very similar, though in a mermaid gown. She’s also heavy handed with the turquoise eye shadow and can’t resist a hot pink shoe. I don’t know if this means she’s on some next level Solange shit or if Solange is regressing and embracing her inner child.

    • demidaemon

      I am going to hope, for everyone’s sake, that’s its regression. At least then she has a chance to evolve/grow out of it.

      • KateShouldBeWorking

        Ha! I was hoping that BitingPanda’s munchkin is a budding little ball of Fabulous.

        But, yeah, this dress is horrible.

        • demidaemon

          Oh, I’m sure she is. I just want her to be Cate/Tilda levels of fabulous, not this so much.

        • @Biting Panda

          She is deeply in touch with her expressive side. : )

  • ballerinawithagun

    I love most of the dress. The band across the breasts is really horrible and then the way it continues across the sleeves makes the dress impossible to move in. I’m assuming she has a coat along. When she puts the coat on the whole dress will move way up and be extremely uncomfortable. When I was creating brides, I had a bride who wanted sleeves cut in this manner. Thank goodness I was able to talk her out of it. With some slight changes it is possible to make sleeves that resemble this cut.

    • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

      True facts! Unless there are massive gussets under those sleeves (which I seriously doubt), she is immobilized.

  • Alyssa

    I will take the shoes. That’s all. I expect more delightful crazy from Solange, and less WTF crazy.

  • DTLAFamilies

    That’s very interesting about her not photographing well. I’ve seen a lot of celebs in person and I’m always struck by how different they look IRL. Some people are way better looking in person (Billy Bob Thornton, Loni Anderson) and others are totally meh (most models with the exception of Bridget Moynihan). Also, the heights: Thornton is taller than I expected, Whoopi Goldberg way shorter.

    • demidaemon

      That’s the one thing that Tyra has right about modeling, I think: the model should always look better in photos than in person.

      • kimmeister

        Reason #37 that I am not a model.

        • demidaemon

          Reason #38: You enjoy food?

          • kimmeister

            Oh that is #4.

          • demidaemon

            I should have known it was higher on the list!

    • KinoEye

      My mom briefly met Cher in the early 70s. Apparently, she’s tiny! Shorter than mom, who’s 5’7. She always looks so tall in photos/video, but I suppose that’s the magic of the camera.

  • NMMagpie

    Trying to stop laughing out loud because a meeting is happening right next to me…

  • SugarSnap108

    I’m all for dressing a little crazy, but “crazy” doesn’t have to mean unflattering and WTF?

    Mono-boob, along with Crazy Crotch, are my great fashion fears.

    • demidaemon

      Crazy Crotch sounds like a really bad STI.

  • Danielle

    Tragic. Just tragic. The hair is the only saving grace.

  • another_laura

    Oh my freaking god, NO! Disastrous choices from top to bottom. I love natural hair but it looks like it’s trying to escape the frame – let’s face it, wouldn’t you?

  • jw_ny

    dress crazy Solange…not dress like a crazy person! this is just awful in so many ways.

  • Jessica Freeman

    The color of that dress is one of my favorites, but it really doesn’t look so hot on Solange. I hate the ruffle on the sleeve, and all of the seams are just ill placed.

    • Qitkat

      A favorite color of mine too, but I despise satin, anywhere, everywhere. There is no saving this dress.

  • 3boysful

    Wow– that bodice fit is atrocious. No one at Carven stepped back and said, “Hmmm, let’s rethink this . . .”??

    Also, I am always predisposed against shiny satin.

    But I will take the bad pink pumps over the model’s horrible sandals.

    All this southern snow is making me grumpy.

    • FrigidDiva

      I’m up in north in the midwest and we haven’t been getting the snow, just the sub-arctic temps where the HIGH was below zero :( I’m getting a serious case of the winter sads after these last couple of weeks. Sigh.

    • Jessica Freeman

      You are not alone. Its been snowing or sleeting for more than 24 hours now. Fussy pants I am.

  • Cheryl

    Too shiny (don’t hate the colour, just the shine) and I HATE, HATE, HATE those shoes. Love the hair though.

  • Jacob Bowen

    I don’t necessarily mind the color and I LOVE the hair, but WOW. Really Solange? Those sleeves are RIDICULOUS.

  • elemspbee

    smells like bridesmaid dress. love the pink shoes.

  • QuincyTKatz

    WANT……the wallpaper behind her!

  • http://www.youtube.com/user/TheOctocornNetwork International Model

    Needs more Diana Ross in the face, since she has the Tracee Ellis Ross in the hair. (I miss “Girlfriends”.)

  • lunchcoma

    Prom dress fabric. Yuck.

  • MaggieMae

    Okay, BKs. I just clicked on the Solange Knowles tag above, and reviewed her looks featured here at TLo Opinions Inc. There are a shocking amount of misses for such a striking woman with kick ass hair.

    • Constant Reader

      Yep! She’s not one of my fashion favorites and I never understood how she got such a reputations for having great style.

    • @Biting Panda

      I believe that’s because she often is swinging for the fences. She’s your home run getting pinch hitter, who either knocks it out of the park or strikes out royally. And hey, good hair will get you a lot of grace.

      • MaggieMae

        Exactly. That’s it! I have been under her hair’s spell. My girl crush is fading after one abysmal strike out after another.

        Lupita! Where are you!?

  • Imasewsure

    I actually like the color on her but I want to see it translated in to a kick ass pantsuit. The dress itself… hiddy hiddy

  • MoHub

    Bridesmaid at a St. Patrick’s Day wedding.

    • http://www.readbarbara.com/ ReadBarbara

      Bridesmaid who once slept with the groom at a St. Patrick’s Day wedding — where the bride arranged for her makeup person to “touch up” the bridesmaids.

      • MoHub

        You win!

        • http://www.readbarbara.com/ ReadBarbara

          Aw, thanks. I’d also like to thank the Academy, my agent, and you for the original inspiration. :-)

  • formerlyAnon

    That is the EPITOME of “I have no money so I used a fabric remnant to make a dress for my Big Date” Cinderella dress. And we, the audience, realize that in this romcom, the date IS her Prince Charming because he takes her somewhere fancy and acts like he never noticed her garish and horrible attire. And they get engaged and he’s rich and buys her decent clothes FIRST THING. And it’s a smash hit movie because it is utterly unlike real life.

  • melanie0866

    Really? I think she looks pretty great. Considering it’s Solange and all.

  • Sharon Weiner

    I screamed out loud. That dress is a boob killer!

  • Tracy_Flick

    World’s most FABULOUS Christmas tree topper.

  • Janet B

    Shiny.
    Ugh

  • demidaemon

    This reminds me of a Christmas tablecloth (or wrapping paper, take your pick) that had an accident with a sewing machine.

    • formerlyAnon

      I choose wrapping paper. The foil kind.

      • demidaemon

        I don’t know. It doesn’t seem wrinkly enough for foil wrapping paper, unless Solange is using electromagnetic energy to keep it smooth.

  • traceyishere

    Why would a woman want her boobs to look like that????

  • Glam Dixie

    I’m frightened, someone hold me. Jesus, this is awful.

  • http://victoriapavlova.com Victoria Pavlova

    She lost a bet, probably. Yes, that’s what that eyeshadow was.

  • Trickytrisha

    Them are some PINK shoes. I mean, they are PINK! Yeah, they warrant yelling – the dress doesn’t. Looks like she’s trying to pull a Lupita with the eyeshadow and failing miserably.

  • wisdomy

    That dress does things to breasts that defy all known laws of physics.

  • SierraDelta

    Um, nice wallpaper?

  • quiltrx

    She looks like someone (I’m thinking a movie character) in that first shot…I keep almost grabbing it in my brain, then it flits away.
    Anyway, besides the boob problems here…I have officially decided that I canNOT with a center seam in a skirt any more, ever. Unless it’s to create a pattern (or pattern match), that shit is ugly and unnecessary.

  • LeelaST

    It could be worse, she could have had that matching-ish pink bag.

  • pdquick

    You’re right it’s hideous, but in the good way.

  • decormaven

    The colors are so glaring they could have sprung from the “Wake Me Up Before You Go Go” video.

  • Ma. Gabriella Dutari

    I think the worst part is the hair/makeup. Awful