T LOunge

Posted on January 31, 2014

Darlings, it’s been a particularly exhausting week of pre-book release poledancing for us and probably exhausting for all of you in your various poledances, so let’s all find a comfy seat and start ordering, yes?

 

Gilt Lounge, Sydney

 

Love. It’s like daycare for grownups. With alcohol.

Let’s see… what’s new with us. Oh yes. Our long awaited baby is mere days from arriving. Excitement does not begin to cover it. We’ve been doing a fair share of press for it (it is INSANE what happens when you do an AP interview and wind up everywhere overnight) and literally every journalist and editor who got an advance copy told us they love it, which has calmed the pre-release jitters considerably. Those who know our site well have told us it sounds exactly like us, while giving the reader something they can’t get when they come here.  You have no idea how much that particular goal drove the whole project from the beginning, so we’re thrilled. We’ve been posting some of our favorite quotes from each chapter all month long over on our book site, so check them out to get a taste. And don’t forget that you only have until this Monday to send us your pre-order confirmation and receive lovely gifts of gratitude in return.

We’re also super-excited to be doing our very first readings and signings. The first one’s this Tuesday, the 4th in Philly (hometown kittens come and show your support), the second one’s Thursday, the 6th, in NYC, (NYC kittens come and show your support) and the third’s in D.C. on the 20th, (D.C. kittens… you know the drill) and we just now got confirmation that we’ll be at the Mall of America in Bloomington Minnesota on Sunday, February 23rd at 1:00 PM.(MINNESOTA KITTENS REPREZENT, YO). We’re kind of giddy about that last one. Especially since we’re pretty sure we’ll turn to blocks of ice the minute we step off the plane.

And yeah, we’re all kinds of self-absorbed and braggy lately. We don’t like being that way on the regular, but we keep looking at each other throughout this whole poledance process and going, “Well if you can’t sound a little full of yourself while you’re trying to sell your book, when can you?” If you want us to shut up, you each have to pledge to buy four copies. We’re not too dignified to try extortion, darlings. You should probably know that by now.

In other T Lo news, we wrote a very short piece for the March issue of Cosmopolitan on the quickest, best way to increase your twitter presence. It was one of those things where we were asked to do something, our initial thought was “Are we really the right people to write this piece?” and then we wound loving it so much by the time we were done (bragging again) that we sat back and said “Why, yes. It turns out we are the right people for this job!” It’s a short little piece in their Fun, Fearless Life User’s Guide feature, if you’re interested in picking it up.

Okay, we’re shutting up now. Tell us all how you’re doing, darling.

 

 

[Photo Credit: qtsydney.com.au]

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  • Mary Elizabeth Poytinger Baume

    i’m doing great boys, living in wisconsin….you are gonna DIE when you get off the plane in MPLS….

    • Swiftlytiltingplanet

      Indeed. I’m in St Paul – the way the winter is going, it will either be snowing or below zero! (I am so motherfucking tired of shoveling!)

      • SierraDelta

        We could all chip in to buy the Muppet coats.

  • lillyvonschtupp

    Remember, second is right after first!

  • HM3

    Any possibility of this tour opening up to other cities?? COME TO ATLANTA.

    • @Biting Panda

      It is my sincere prayer, that as pre sales, good reviews and high turnouts are noted by their People, Atlanta will make the list of cities that must be added to accommodate the Bitter Kittens.

    • Suzanne Moore

      Come to Tucson! It’s been in the low 70s all of January and I’ve worn my shorts every afternoon. It’s just what our freezing Uncles and Bitter Kittens everywhere need right now. Come West!

    • decormaven

      After this week in ATL, I’m afraid to beckon anyone this way unless they come equipped with a disaster pack.

      • largishbearishAtlish

        Decor- just remember to vote for Carter for governor :) (sorry to to pollute with political chit chat)

    • largishbearishAtlish

      A shame Oxford Books is but a memory- that would have been the perfect place for anything T’lo… (Atlanta)

  • @Biting Panda

    You two are just too fucking fabulous. And hopefully you know how proud of you and excited for you that we all are.

    So, most of the nation is laughing at my city right now. To that I say, fuck them all. It wasn’t 2″ of snow that paralyzed my city, it was the rapidly forming ice underneath one of the Nation’s most notorious gridlocks. It looks funny on The Daily Show, but it was scary as fuck if you lived here. Worse for the people trapped on the roads for anywhere from 12 to 24 hours. Though, my faith in humanity was restored when I found the SnowedOutAtlanta fb page and watched as thousands of strangers bent over backwards to help each other, while city officials and the National Guard dicked around and burried their heads in their asses. The city opened its doors and its hearts to each other and it was a pretty amazing thing to see unfold.

    I have a btichin’ head cold and sadly, I can’t stay and relax in tonight’s lounge. Family obligations call and apparently if you blow off the birthday party, even for a grownup, it’s still an actionable offense. So I’m going to get drunk and sneeze on the people who guilt tripped me into coming.

    One last thing. A shameless plug. If you feel like having a giggle, youtube my friend Ashely McBryde. She wrote a song just after Miley’s VMA twerk heard round the world, and set it to a Barbara Mandrell hit. “I Was Twerkin When Twerkin’ Wasn’t Cool”. Given Miley’s new re-embracing of her country roots, I hope one day she stumbles upon it.

    Love to love ya Kittens.

    • Swiftlytiltingplanet

      I think there may be a country song in “I’m going to get drunk and sneeze on people.”

      • marlie

        If there isn’t one, some of the more creative Kittens had better get on it! ;)

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ foodycatAlicia

        It sounds like the sequel to “I spent my last 10 bucks on birth control and beer”.

        • formerlyAnon

          Everyone should be so smart.

        • http://www.ellenciompi.com/ NurseEllen

          I thought I was the only person who knew that song! second line: “My life was so much simpler when I was sober and queer”. Thanks for the memory jar, foodycat.

          • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ foodycatAlicia

            It’s a great song!

    • Qitkat

      Your friend has a great voice, and sense of humor. The perfect parody song.

      • @Biting Panda

        She is pretty amazing. She’s a professional and I met he when I went to Mississippi for the funeral. She sometimes plays with my cousin.

    • conniemd

      Can’t hate on Atlanta. You do have a traffic problem with gridlock even without the snow. But my daughter went to Emory and I remember her calling me and laughing her ass off at school being cancelled for an inch of snow. She looked out the window and being a northeasterner who has lived through 3 feet of snow she was definitely WTF?

      What I couldn’t understand though was why people spent the night in their cars and walk to the nearest exit and some shelter. I’ve been in blizzards that you couldn’t walk in, but what you had was easy pickings.

      • @Biting Panda

        Many people did walk out, walk to businesses and walk to addresses of people who offered on line. So many here, commute 1 to 2 hours away on a regular traffic day. Our burbs are vastly spawled. So few here have our were wearing the proper clothing for temps in the teens and single digits.

      • VioletFem

        It was primarily caused by a lack of preparation by the authorities and state officials. This storm did not come as a surprise. We had been warned for a week or 2 that snow and ice was coming. However, the roads were not properly prepared and the governor and mayor failed to officially cancel school on that day. Instead, people went about their day as usual. Most schools were open and most people went to work. By the time state officials realized that the storm was coming everyone was at work or school. They informed all the municipalities in metro atlantan area to close school/businesses. As a result, 5 million Atlantans tried to leave work at the same time. Since we have a barely functioning transit system, that meant that most people got in their cars to drive home. This turned the snow storm into a shit storm. Every single highway was completely blocked for hours with little to know movement. The snow eventually turned to ice, which is the real danger during snowstorms, and caused a record number of accidents. We rarely get snow storms, so the state has not really invested in winter disaster preparation. We have a bare bones transit system (MARTA), so most people have to drive their cars. Plus, Atlanta is a sprawling city best described as loosely connected suburbs and municipalities rather than one large city. Thus, most people who work in Atlanta proper, don’t actually live in Atlanta but have to commute via the highway to get to work. All of this combined to create the disaster that unfolded on Tuesday. All of this could have been avoided, had the state taken the necessary precautions before hand.

        • decormaven

          “Atlanta is a sprawling city best described as loosely connected suburbs and municipalities rather than one large city.” So true, and it’s time something gets done to get it rectified. Bless every person who struggled to get home on Tuesday.

          • largishbearishAtlish

            The irony being that the Weather Channel is BASED in Atlanta..and the governor has done quite the tap dance on this situation.. and the local forecasters DID upgrade the storm @ 2am..

        • mixedupfiles

          People tend to understand that infrastructure requires planning — of course you don’t have a lot of plows, you don’t need them. But procedure also requires planning, and when a city encounters the kind of emergency it doesn’t deal with much, it may not have yet learned the lessons of good planning for that particular circumstance.

          • demidaemon

            It reminds me of the problem my college had during my undergrad days. My first year there, we had about five gazillion* tornado warnings. We didn’t get a proper tornado procedure until the next school year. However, this was in Iowa. I don’t think I’m over at how backwards this was.

            *A small exaggeration.

    • Call me Bee

      It’s too bad about the ice and snow in Atlanta. I understand your town is just not equipped for it. We’re even running out of salt up here in Cheeseland! We had a busload of kids from a local high school (the band kids!) stuck just outside Atlanta on their way home from performing at Disney World. What a mess.

      • largishbearishAtlish

        one wonderful story I heard today (in Atlanta) a local Target allowed 2 busloads of kids with disabilities who were stuck on the road) to stay in their store (and sleep/eat) over night (and not in the bus). The next morning the deli and Starbucks made the breakfast…75 folks..how wonderful.

    • guest2visits

      So true; it wasn’t about the cold or the 2 inches of snow. It was about the ICE that formed on the freeways and byways. I don’t live in Georgia but I know if the region doesn’t have the equipment or the preparation; they will have the same problems maneuvering on icy roads as anywhere else.
      I’ve been sick for the past week too. Exhausted. You have all my sympathy. Maybe a glass wine will be the cure! When you fall asleep they’ll just push you off to the corner and cover you with a blanket.

    • VioletFem

      Yes thank you for clearing this up. I was one of the “lucky” many who was got stuck along 1-20 for about 11 hours trying to get home. My commute is usually around 40 minutes. I was lucky that I didn’t have to abandon my car, but it was still scary if I was going to be able to get home that day.

      • Qitkat

        Well this certainly puts into perspective my recent 2+ hour drive for 30 miles in Denver, in light slushy snow. And we are generally prepared rather well on the main roads. How awful for all of Atlanta. I’ve been there in the summer, and realized that the traffic is quite heavy, so all I can say is YIKES, and so glad you are OK.

      • @Biting Panda

        Bless your heart!

      • marlie

        One of my college friends reported a 12 hour commute, when it usually takes about 30 minutes. Interestingly enough, my friends who are *from* the northeast either stayed home from work/school, or left earlier than every single other person in the city. It’s a relief to find out that all of my friends and family (real and virtual) made it home safely, even it took a ridiculously long time.

        • formerlyAnon

          A friend whose normal commute is about an hour made home in 2 – but she left 45 minutes before the schools/businesses/government “called it” (because she’s lived in Colorado and knew things were looking bad) and took back roads to stay off the highway. First time ever she was happy that her car is such an aging piece of crap that she had had to figure out a way to get to work without going on the highway.

          • @Biting Panda

            Surface streets saved my ass too.

    • Suzanne Moore

      Amen, Biting Panda. I grew up in Atlanta and it’s NOT the snow that paralyzes the city, it’s always the ice. Did you get stuck on the freeway? Fingers crossed you were safe at home.

      • @Biting Panda

        No, I was incredibly fortunate. I left for my 45 minute, surface streets commute right at noon.

    • demidaemon

      I approve your behavior wholeheartedly.

    • UsedtobeEP

      I am not laughing at you. I too, live in the icy southern part of the world. We get it.

    • CatherineRhodes

      Don’t feel bad about the 2″ of snow. A couple of years ago, my city of Los Angeles was paralyzed by a heavy RAINFALL. Seriously! Now, that is laughable.

  • sagecreek

    Come to Austin!

    • travelingcat

      Indeed!

    • formerlyAnon

      They really should. We’d LOVE to have them. I’m just hoping they have dear, dear friends living in Austin whom they miss terribly.

    • KinoEye

      Or Dallas! Uncle Karl visited for the Chanel show not too long ago. I’d make sure you two were also greeted as the visiting royalty you are! I’m actually located in East Texas. But I wouldn’t ask anyone to come here unless, like me, they absolutely had to. It’s the land that time forgot.

  • GeoDiva

    Wish I had know about this place when I was Sydney last summer…. Looking forward to getting my copy of your book. Is Honolulu too far off the book tour path for you guys to visit?

    • Kate4queen

      I’m on the Big Island so they could definitely do both, right?

      • formerlyAnon

        Once they’ve gone all that way into the Pacific, it would be a crime not to.

  • bitchybitchybitchy

    This BK cannot wait til the 20th-I will be there!

  • Imasewsure

    You are not bragging darling Uncles, you are simply sharing and we support you 100%. Please do remember to use the book tour as an excuse for a wanton shopping spree!! Good excuses are so hard to come by… :)

    • marlie

      If it were me, I’d just have to get an entirely new outfit for each and every interview and book signing event. Because, WHY NOT?!

      • decormaven

        And it’s a business deduction as well! Good grooming is so very necessary for your enterprise, sirs.

  • Sobaika

    Very happy for you both! Excited to see you (and NYC BKs) soon.

    Life has turned spectacularly upside down for me. Which is fine, it is what it is. Sp tonight I’ll be the obnoxious one in the corner, downing shots of tequila and giving the dirty bartender come-hither eyes.

    • Swiftlytiltingplanet

      We’ve all been there. Don’t forget the salt & lime.

    • Rand Ortega

      Drinks are on me, Doll. Hugs. Hope you’re weathering your sitch as best as possible. (Lucky Bartender!)

    • marlie

      Just make sure you have someone you trust to wheel you home.

    • decormaven

      What turns one way can swiftly turn the other. Hold steady and weather the storm. Strong spirit(s) will see you through.

    • SierraDelta

      I’ll provide the chocolate. The important food groups must be represented.

  • AlexisPayne

    Brava darlings!
    This round is on me, I just got a raise!!!
    BTW- Will we be seeing you on the west coast? It is nice and warm here….

  • kimmeister

    The hubby is going to a Super Bowl party. Meanwhile, I literally would rather scrub my toilet than watch football, so I will likely be home catching up on some projects, including bathing the cats.

    • SayWTH

      Kimmeister Darling,
      I think you are my twin! Although I do generally go to my neighbors’ Stupid Bowl party for the food and so I can sit in another room and make sarcastic remarks about all the people yelling at the tv as if the coaches and players can hear them.

    • Lilithcat

      I mentioned it earlier, but are you aware of the Kitten Bowl?

      • travelingcat

        ooooh, I wasn’t. Thanks for sharing!

      • kimmeister

        I heard about the puppy bowl but not the kitten one, thanks!

        • Janet B

          There is also a Fish Bowl!

    • SarahBeth

      Bathing the cats? I want video of that.

      • kimmeister

        It would consist of one cat crying like I’m killing him, while the other looks on with concern for him. Then, when it’s her turn, she will suffer in silence while he’s off licking his butt or something.

        • piperkitty

          I have 3 cats and a dog. Their bathing routine consists of me in the shower while my husband hands me them one by one to be bathed. The remaining 3 sit outside the shower doors mesmerized. Whoever is being washed is youling which makes the 3 observers and the neighbors dog (in the summer when the windows are open) answer in sympathy.

          • kimmeister

            I can’t believe the observers don’t run and hide, knowing that they’re next!

          • piperkitty

            Just a fascinated sympathy chorus!

          • demidaemon

            Our dog actually enjoys getting into the shower with family members, which is a great boon. Anything to do with nails or brushing, though, is a huge undertaking.

          • piperkitty

            Nails are a challenge with our dog. She hates them to be cut or sanded down. I walk her which helps keep them short. Problem is she is a chi/terrier mix….very little fur on her belly..hates coats or sweaters…we live in NE PA. Snow & cold. No walks in the winter. She suffers through nail trims for a few months.

          • DuBey2

            I can’t stop laughing at this. Now my nose is even running. Too funny!

    • Sarah

      Oh, I wish I could stay home and bathe cats. I have to drive an hour and a half to my fiancé’s family’s property for their Superb Owl party, but not until after he gets off work tomorrow. Then we spend the evening overeating and watching foosball, kick his poor old mother out of her bed in the singlewide so that we can spend the night, and then get up ungodly early to drive home so that he can make a work meeting at 9 am. UGH.

      • Qitkat

        Love for the Superb Owl. I’ll have to work that in tomorrow.

        • Sarah

          I have to give the thanks to Stephen Colbert for that one, but it is worthy of spreading around :)

      • kimmeister

        There’s been a lot of owl motifs in fashion over the past few months, that should totally be its name.

        • Sarah

          Hehe. Good luck with your cat baths! I’ve got two who don’t mind, one that complains but will deal with it because he’s too fat and ungainly to fight, and one who would gladly eviscerate me for attempting it. (She’s never been bathed. Medicating her is dangerous enough, and luckily she keeps herself pretty tidy).

          • demidaemon

            When we had to medicate my last kitty (RIP Rita), she became an expert at pocketing the pill and then spitting it up on my bed. Fun times.

          • Sarah

            RIP indeed. Dad had to put his old grumpy weirdo cat down last Friday. I feel bad for him even though I don’t get along with him. He cried on the phone. Sigh. The cat was hateful and feisty but he loved the hell out of my dad, which is weird. Last vestige for him of when my mother was still living, I guess. He has a dog, though, and as horrid as it sounds, I suspect that at least some of it was crocodile tears (he’s a big one for self-pity) so he’ll get over it soon enough.

          • demidaemon

            Yeah, I understand where you are coming from. I have relatives like that, though they aren’t as close relationally as a parent. I really miss having a kitty, and, whenever anyone talks about kitties here, I get that pang again. My current ? as to where I will be in six months time prevents it, as I don’t want to force move a kitty, as they usually despise it.

          • SierraDelta

            My husband’s parents had The Cat from Hell, and she regularly tried to eat the grandchildren. I hated her for terrifying my children when they were small and for additional unrelated reasons (involving bodily fluids and the bed I was sleeping in) and was entirely unmoved when she went to the great catnip place in the sky.

          • kimmeister

            It went exactly as I described above, only it ended up not being a sunny afternoon conducive to drying my wet babies quickly. We got some much needed rain, though it’s just a drop in the bucket of deficit. I turned on the heat instead, and will be enjoying two fragrant and soft kitties in my bed tonight.

    • demidaemon

      We’re probably going to watch the Kitty and Puppy Bowls here. So, if you need some appropriate background viewing while you do the second most difficult thing to do with cats (the first being herding them, of course!)…

  • Rand Ortega

    Very proud of your monumental achievement, brothers T & Lo. You give bloggers a great name. May your wonderful success only grow. I hope this experience only enriches your talent so we BK’s, PUF’s & the rest of the world are the recipients of more from you.

  • majorbedhead

    My sitter canceled at the last minute, so I am home with the two little girls, drowning my sorrows in some wine. They are currently upstairs being far too quiet, so I’d best go investigate. Someone pour me another while I go see what damage they’ve wrought.

    • Qitkat

      Sympathies. I felt badly to be the cancelOR for my son and wife for their dinner out with friends. I will miss seeing my sweet Cadybear two year old grandson but hope to see them soon. It’s been snowing off and on around Denver since yesterday and calling for more tonight. After a trip this last Monday night which took me two and a quarter effing hours to go 30 miles in slushy rainsnow and heavy traffic, I didn’t want a repeat. My wine will have to be virtual as I am still on my effing diet for another month, even though it has stalled spectacularly for the previous month.

      • majorbedhead

        The snow has just screwed up so many places. It hasn’t snowed here in Massachusetts, but it’s been colder that the proverbial witch’s tit.

        The girls decided to drench themselves in my Coco by Chanel. My bedroom smells like a French whorehouse now.

        • SRQkitten

          You know the weathers squirrely when it has snowed in Florida and not in Massachusetts.

          • majorbedhead

            I know! What is *that* all about? We’re used to this stuff. Florida and Georgia? Not so much.

          • Qitkat

            It snowed in Florida once when I was a teenager there, around 50 million years ago. We ran out of our high school classrooms and acted like idiots for a few flakes falling from the sky. I don’t think anything stuck though.

        • formerlyAnon

          Children are such little treasures! The ones with initiative and the bright ones – those who get and can execute “ideas” are the ones that wear you out.

      • formerlyAnon

        I’m fascinated by the concept of a diet which actually has a defined expiration date. Is there an upcoming event? If so, I do hope it is social rather than medical.

        Of course, officially I don’t diet anymore because that’s not the healthy thing, right? I just “reform my eating habits.” Which looks strangely like what “dieting” used to look like, (having been at it long enough now that I know exactly what I can stand to do for long enough for it to work.) And it’s permanent but cyclical – there being numerous degrees of adherence to “eating right.”

        • Qitkat

          Of course you are right, and that is the ultimate goal. It’s just my latest attempt to get off the weight that has plagued me for maybe 20+ years now (I was a skinny kid and young/middle adult). Ahh, what hormonal and emotional baggage will do to one’s body. Anyway, it’s one of those shake/bar/soup plans, six servings per day, 960 calories, this one is called Optifast. The first phase lasts 16 weeks with the plan food only, then transitions for 4 weeks gradually back to better healthier choices. I did fine til Christmas, and discovered that I was all too human and not immune to the numerous temptations that came my way. But I do have to be happy that I have lost a good, if not quite yet significant portion of the weight I needed/wanted to lose, and have at least kept it off, even if it hasn’t been as much loss as I initially hoped for. It is medically supervised, with weekly support meetings, discussions, and a handbook to help us rethink all our poor choices which lead to this state of affairs. I don’t mind the meetings, the core group that remains, about 10 people out of an original 24, are super nice people, some with issues that I thank God that I don’t have to deal with. As far as the knowledge to go forward with real food, I pretty much knew most of it already, but sometimes it’s good to be reminded. I think I have two main issues with it. First of all, it is very processed, with only a cup of veg allowed per day. Second of all, I am just plain fucking bored with it, and the products are much more sweet than savory, which I miss very much. But I’ve lost weight before, and it has always crept back. So I’m trying to be optimistic but it has to be a lifetime change. I’m hoping to hit pretty close to my desired weight by my birthday in August. It’s doable, but ever challenging. And I know you didn’t ask this much, but as usual I got carried away (probably similarly to the can’t eat just one mentality I don’t want to revert back to.) And no there is not an upcoming event per se, although I do hope to spend a few days in New Orleans catching up with my best friend in maybe 3-4 months, whom I haven’t seen in several years.

          • Sarah

            Best of luck, Qitkat. I’m endeavoring with WW again, as I did last year. I lost 30 lbs, and managed to keep about 20 of it off, but I need to lose about 40 more, so here I go again. I will think of you and hope we both have the outcomes we are looking for. I’ve found my wedding dress, but I want to be the size 12 I was and not the 16 I am when I buy it, so that’s my impetus. We haven’t set a date yet, and I feel like if we don’t soon, it’s going to be next year rather than this, so while Future Mr. Sarah thinks that there’s all the time in the world – for EVERYTHING – he is just going to have to deal with my imposed timeline. (I’m 4 years older than him – he doesn’t seem to be able to keep it in the forefront of his mind that it’s not just a wedding – it’s a baby and a family that I’m itchin’ for. Plenty of time, he says!) But, in the meantime, I’m going to see P-Funk in Philly at the beginning of March, so I’d like to get at least a little more trim for a night of hard-core dancin’.

          • Qitkat

            Awesome that you found the perfect wedding dress! Good luck with your endeavors too. I may go back to WW later this year, if I have issues with going forward with the new/old ideas i have relearned. It’s the keeping off that it all comes down to. Let’s become SBKs together (skinny-ish) this year. I will stay tuned for further wedding developments :-)

          • formerlyAnon

            Go you! Keeping off 2/3 of that weight puts you ahead of the odds. And yeah, some boys just forget that THEY can have healthy babies for decades longer than we girls. (Survival of the species has a LOT to answer for, IMO.)

          • formerlyAnon

            Oh my lord, Quitkat! I could NEVER do what you’re doing. Maybe for two weeks, tops, or if I had to lose a ton of weight in an inhuman hurry for life saving surgery.

            I’ve lost considerable weight (60+ lb.) once in my life, over 15 years ago, but I’ve always had to watch it and I’m currently trying to lose some that’s crept back on. But I have to be able to follow my whims and satisfy my (sometimes odd) likes. If I have to live in a setting where I eat institutional food in old age, it’s going to be hard.

            I was raised by people who, in childhood, got enough calories, if sometimes barely, but a hell of a lot of them were potatoes and cabbage and the other boring foods of poverty in the 1930s. For my family, food is creative expression and entertainment and love and ALL THE THINGS. All of us cook, and like it, including the men. We talk about it, and about what’s in the garden, and what great finds someone made a the supermarket. We do informal tastings to figure out which is the *right* ketchup or cheap wine or mushrooms or almond milk or whatever. Except for the fact that some of our tastes are kind of low rent, none of us could figure out what was such a big deal about “foodie culture.” That was growing up my house, and my cousins’ homes. I’m sure adjusting my emotional involvement with food would make the lifelong balancing act easier, but I just don’t want to.

            I can’t even follow a ‘normal’ diet – I knew calorie counts before I hit my teens, I’ve learned about nutrients and if I’m motivated I can make that work. (I think those who were thin with little or no effort into their 30s and beyond are at a huge disadvantage when the metabolism finally slows down.)

            So all that is to say GO YOU. (Also, obviously, that your post was not TMI at all, as far as I’m concerned!). If this program helps you take off a big chunk of what you want to lose pretty efficiently, it’ll make getting to the goal range and staying there so much easier. You sound like you’re committed and doing it right!

          • Qitkat

            formerlyAnon, I read this last evening and for some reason, what you have said here really made me emotional, and I wanted to settle down before I responded. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for your support. In a way although my family has been behind me, I have found some of my best support right here on this blog, as we have learned, we can unburden ourselves anonymously often better to strangers. Many years ago I met an awesome woman on an airplane trip that got canceled, actually the airline went out of business as we sat on the tarmac. I was many miles from home with nowhere to go, and I trusted my gut and accepted her offer of spending the night at her nearby apartment. It turned out to be one of the most amazing, heartfelt meetings of my life. We spent many hours together, both of us sharing very private moments with each other, trusting it would not be the wrong move to make. I never saw or heard from her again after we got our rebooked flight out the next day, and talked again until we touched down. But it has always stuck with me, and I have always remembered her, how easy it was to share with a complete stranger, and get another’s perspective. There’s a sense of this here too, and I respond similarly.

            I wish there was time and space to go into some of the food issues that I now realize have impacted on me one way or another since childhood. But I am grateful to have this forum, and be as honest as I can be without being a crashing bore. I think I will return to this forum when I have tough moments and remind myself of the support from you and @disqus_uaAgd5XTr8:disqus. True blessings.

          • SierraDelta

            I’m trying to practice mindful eating this year.

            I can’t stand the thought of dieting. I don’t do well with the rigidity and artificial restrictions of a formal diet — I just want to find my personal balance between food consumption and exercise, a way to eat and move sensibly that will work for me for the rest of my life. I’m trying to concentrate on the choices I make at every meal, while realizing that if I don’t get it right this time, I’ll have another chance in a few hours. I’m holding myself accountable for the results, and I’m trying to learn from my mistakes. That seems to keep me from being fixated on the food itself; it’s more a philosophical internal discussion about behavior patterns and options, and that seems to work better for me.

            I’m hoping I can make this mindful stuff a habit — I don’t want to be one of those women who talk about food-as-the-enemy all of the time. I want balance in my life, and I’m making that a priority this year.

            I hope you’ll continue to share your experiences, Qitkat and Sarah.

          • Qitkat

            Mindful eating and balance. This is part of my journey too, and I hope that I don’t make it so hard for myself from now on. And for the record I agree with you about not doing well with rigidity and artificial restrictions. I’ve learned that I don’t do well either. I’m sticking it out until this final month ends, though, because I want to affirm that I’m not a quitter. I’m going to also look at this experience as not having made a mistake to do it, because I think in many ways it has helped me to screw my head on straighter. I’ve noticed I have more confidence in myself now, I feel more “me” than I have in some time, so it’s been a valuable internal awakening.

          • SierraDelta

            To echo formerlyAnon, GO YOU!

            What you’re doing is hard (and hard work). My brother said something recently that resonated with me: “I’m the CEO of this body.” It puts a different slant on things; it makes me feel like I have more (mental) power in this relationship with my body, and I owe it to myself to maintain it properly.

          • SierraDelta

            FormerlyA., you’re dispensing all kinds of real world wisdom this weekend. Thanks for cheerleading when it’s needed.

          • formerlyAnon

            You’re kind. It’s so easy to say the exact wrong thing even though one means well, but I’ve had plenty of both cheerleaders and listeners in my life and sometimes it’s some little thing that helps in a tough moment. Cheerleading is easier for me. I’m still working on listening.

    • Violina23

      Nothing more suspicious than quiet children…

  • Lilithcat

    I ran around doing all my errands this afternoon, because we are supposed to get slammed with snow starting around midnight. Right now, there’s a lamb shank braising in the oven. It’ll be washed down with a Chilean red.

    I got a call that my commitment for tomorrow has been cancelled due to the weather. So I am planning on spending the weekend indoors, doing exciting things like laundry, and snuggling with the cats. I know a lot of the BKs will be watching the Super Bowl on Sunday, but surely this is more appropriate! (Cuter, too.)

    • Saturnine

      Oh, a nice lamb shank. Enjoy :-)

      • Lilithcat

        It was delicious, thanks!

    • Call me Bee

      Oh yes! That storm will be skirting our area as well, though I hear northern IL will really get slammed! We’ll probably get 3-4 inches up here.

    • rainwood1

      I NEVER watch the Super Bowl but because our team is in it this year, I kind of have to. That’s all anyone in this city will be talking about on Monday. So in the spirit of forced participation: Go Seahawks!

      • Qitkat

        Denver is beside itself for the last couple of weeks. Me, I really don’t care, but am surrounded by family who love this stuff. So I watch for the commercials and diet busting snacks. So Go Broncos!

        • Janet B

          If I could swap places with you I would. I’m the only football fan in my family, so I’m bribing them to watch with me with promises of roasted turkey sandwiches and other tasty food.
          To add to everyone’s misery, I am a lifetime Bronco fan in the SF Bay Area.

          • Qitkat

            Did you ever live in Denver area? If you did, you know how seriously they take “Your Denver Broncos”!

          • Janet B

            LOL
            Not much awareness of anything when I lived there, we moved when I was 6 months old.

  • Jackie4g

    I pre-ordered the book from Amazon, does that count? Seriously, the cold is the cold is the cold. It’s miserable everywhere, so you’ll be fine in Mpls. I always read that abbreviation as “mupples”. Sorry, Minnesotans, no offense intended.

  • lesmaha

    Uncles, so proud of you and your new book!!!

  • Pennymac

    I ADORE hearing how well things are going for you two, its not bragging if its true, right? We love our Fabulous Gay Uncles and want you to have a Fabulous life! Plus, there’s that whole, “we knew you when” thingie……

    Signed contracts to start production of my first TV commercial today! And I managed to royally insult one of the “Old White Guys”I work for this week and still not get fired! TGI effing F!

    • formerlyAnon

      Well YAY for you! Sounds like a good day.

    • rainwood1

      Congrats on the commercial! Oh, and not getting fired.

  • MilaXX

    Home fighting a headache. I cannot wait for Tuesday. Hopefully either snow or bad health will keep me away!

    • marlie

      I hope you mean *neither.* It would be a bummer to not see you there. ;)

    • altalinda

      See you there!

  • Violina23

    My 7 month old is sick. She got me sick. The 4 year old is taking advantage of my weakened state and being a TOTAL whiny pain in the ass. Everyone was in tears at some point today. I was eyeing an escape route out the window… then the 4 year old started tickling the baby with a stuffed animal and she started GIGGLING. Yes, pure BABY GIGGLES. Fruit of the gods. You win this round, offspring!

    I REALLY REALLY REALLY want to come to the NYC signing next week, but I live in Northern NJ and getting to downtown Manhattan by 6PM might be damn near impossible. My husband works in midtown but the fabulousness of TLo would likely be lost on him, considering he once asked me what “T-J-Lo” thought about something ;-)

    TG-Friggin-F Y’all!

    • Call me Bee

      Ahhh those are golden moments, no? When kids behave and even have fun together. It does get better. Have a drink on me–after the kids get to beddy-by.

    • marlie

      Next time you’re at the brink of tears, remember the baby giggles! Always the baby giggles.

    • Pennymac

      Nothing cheers like a baby belly laugh!

  • Call me Bee

    Hello dear Uncles! Such exciting times for you, capped off by a trip to… THE MALL! Duh, duh Duuuuuh… Be prepared–it’s cold around these parts, and will be unitl sometime in June. Pack your woolies. I’ll be about 3 hours away from the Cities that weekend visiting friends in western WI, but I just can’t make it up there. Maybe when you make it to Chicago…?
    Nothing much new with me. Enjoying retirement, though we’re quickly running out of cash. So I’ve been selling any and all extraneous vintage or antique items. Anyone want to buy a hatbox full of mink hats, tassels and collars? Oh–I’ll have Stoli straight up. It’s tough getting rid of treasures…..silly as they are.

  • conniemd

    No comments on last night’s “Under the Gun?” Poor Nick really got dumped on. What Tim didn’t say was that the mentors should have told their designers NEVER buy silk/satin, it’s a bitch to work with. I understand Nick’s desire to do something with that horrid green silk gown, what a horrid fabric choice. With editing, don’t know how much he meddled with the other designers.

    The loser deserved to lose since her zipper didn’t meet at the top in the back. The winner – Sam?? – had a pants suit (ugh) that looked a lot like his design the prior week fabricwise. I would have given the win to that glorious blue print .

    • pherociouscake

      this show. . .this disaster of a show
      so much gagging earnestness, ugh.

      • Pennymac

        Watched half of an episode. It was enough to legitimize a “Not going to view ever again” decision.

        • Swiftlytiltingplanet

          I made it to the end of the first one and was lost forever when one of the “eliminated” had a breakdown and then, everyone in tears, as a result both Mondo and Nic wanted her. Ugh. I felt so dirty.

        • demidaemon

          I am so glad I decided to not watch this show at all.

    • Call me Bee

      Oh yeah–the show. Eh. I like Sam–a young 20-something who actually seems to be nice and thoughtful and not (yet) a total a-hole. But–I don’t think his look was a winning design by any mean. I thought the guy who made that stunning BW suit shoulda won. And I wonder if Nick just didn’t get caught up in the whole design-a-dress-in-an-hour maelstrom. I’ll bet it felt very familiar to the mentors in that workroom.

      • Lilithcat

        Sam seems cool. Not too full of himself.

        But I must say that my favorite moment was when Shan told his model something to the effect of “Don’t apologize for having breasts!” A breath of fresh air, considering what we usually hear designers say when their model is bigger than they expected in that area. Who was the nitwit who whined about “not liking boobies”?

        • BuffaloBarbara

          Olivier, I think, bitched about them wrecking his clothes.

          It was Shan’s suit, but I think it was one of the other designers who said it. I don’t know them all. Shan seems pretty down to earth, too, though. I think his problem with the model wasn’t that she had breasts, but that the agency had sent him the wrong measurements for said mammaries, and his jacket didn’t have enough cloth to let out, so he was worried that the poor thing was going to have a wardrobe malfunction on the runway. (Why would a model’s handlers send the wrong measurements? Wouldn’t that cause the designer trouble in a pinch and make him less likely to use the model OR the agency in the future?)

          • Lilithcat

            No, it was Shan, because he was responding to the issue of her having different measurements. I do not understand why the wrong measurements are sent! One of the other designers had a model with a larger hip measurement. And I recall this has happened before. Makes no sense to me!

          • BuffaloBarbara

            Yeah, that’s right — it was one of those complicated piece-work outfits, and the whole thing went under because everything shifted when he tried to let it out.

            I had it in my head that Shan was doing the alterations, the model said she was sorry, and one of the other designers, was for some reason helping, said, “Don’t ever apologize for having breasts.” But I could definitely be wrong about that. It would be nice if there were two with that kind of decent attitude, though.

          • Lilithcat

            Forgot to say, yes, you’re right, it was Olivier!

          • Carrps

            Can’t say for certain, but I’m wondering if she had implants? If she didn’t have her agency update her stats, that could be a problem.

        • Call me Bee

          Wasn’t that Ven, the designer from India that did all the origami on his clothes? A couple seasons back, though I don’t remember which…

          • Lilithcat

            BuffaloBarbara has it right, at least it was Olivier I was thinking of. Of course, he may well not be the only one!

        • ShaoLinKitten

          Blake is the one who told her not to apologize for having breasts. It was refreshing.

          I thought Shan should have one this challenge. I so could see Rihanna wearing that suit, half-bared breasts and all. The sparkly overalls… nope. Sam seems nice but that look was wildly overpraised. WILDLY. I can see that everyone is dazzled by Sam in a way that I fail to comprehend.

          • Sarah

            I agree re: Sam. I didn’t think he deserved the win. As in, sure, it was okay, but the best? No.

    • Lilithcat

      Nick deserved it. Having served as a mentor myself, I can say that he was way too “hands on”. I can’t remember who said he was “micro-managing”, but that was true. Mentors are supposed to guide the people they work with, not do the work for them.

    • Gauss

      Lifetime hasn’t posted this episode on their website, and I couldn’t find it on Hulu or youtube either. I’m too lazy to look at less than legal sources…

      • Lisa_Co

        It’s not worth it. I find it a really bad show…. worse than PR. The Uncles tweeted last night that they won’t be watching again.

        Instead, I suggest The Fashion Fund on Ovation, Wednesday night. Anyone watch this week? I really like the show. My only complaint is the camera work often fails to show a head to toe look (we see waist up alot). But these are REAL fashion designers, not something manufactured for TV.

        • Qitkat

          I’m enjoying TFF. Almost a relief to watch genuine professionalism.

        • demidaemon

          I would watch that, but it airs at the same time as Top Chef. I don’t remember if DISH gets that channel, and I am too lazy to look it up.

          Top Chef, by the way, was horribly emotional this week. When the host starts to cry over an elimination, you really know the heartstrings are going to get pulled.

          • Sarah

            DISH doesn’t. Not in my package, anyway. :(

    • Lisa_Co

      Interesting that despite over zealous “mentoring” , 3 out of Nick’s 4 designers were safe.

    • BuffaloBarbara

      Nick is obviously kind of nervous.

      On the other, some of the stuff was legit mentoring — cutting fabric, no. Saying, “Fabric will do this if you do that”? Yeah, that’s legitimate mentoring.

      I don’t mind the show, though I tend to forget about it. These things aren’t as much fun without instant TLounge conversation.

    • Sarah

      I do not know why that horrid green silk gown did not get eliminated. It was incredibly bad. And I thought Nick sort of deserved the dumping-on. He was way too fussy, and doesn’t seem to understand that if he wants to approach mentoring as a teacher, he should remember that teachers don’t GIVE you the answers to the test, they just prepare you for it.

      • demidaemon

        You know what? I go over the exact questions and answers on my tests–except for the long essays–and students still fail them. What does that say?

        • Sarah

          Oh, I know. My bff is a middle-school teacher, and she gives her kids the answers too, and they fail. What it says is that the future is frightening. I know I’m not as well educated as my parents, and I’m a frikkin’ genius compared to these kids she’s teaching. It is not comforting.

          • demidaemon

            My students are (mostly) adults. The good news is that, of the 8 graded, 6 passed, most with Bs or above. So maybe my hard work is paying off?

          • Sarah

            I shall hope so! I am a much better student as an adult, too. Maybe we should just put kids to work at around 12 and not send ‘em back to school until they’re grown up, or something. Like, leave the hormonal years to farming.

          • demidaemon

            HA! I do fear the repercussions of that, though.

          • SierraDelta

            THE FOLLOWING IS IRONIC: Reproduction should also be left to 12-year-olds; they’re the only ones who have the stamina to keep up with baby persons.

        • formerlyAnon

          It says that society now demands that people who once could make a living with a 6th or 8th grade education now have to have some post-secondary credentialing? It says that the k-12 system in many places, does not prepare students adequately for post-secondary education? ETA: And that people who don’t want to be there are convinced they have to be – not incorrectly – but they aren’t really fully committed?

          Seriously, though. 100 years ago if you couldn’t hack more than the basics of reading, writing and arithmetic, you could support yourself, and possibly a family, if you had a strong body and some ability to be trained. People were allowed to drop out of the educational system pretty much (by today’s standards) at will. I’m not saying that people lived well, by our standards, or that everyone was employable or employed – and there wouldn’t be unions if people hadn’t been pretty thoroughly exploited and downtrodden in some industries – but that today’s system not only under-prepares and under-serves the capable, but is also expected to teach those who in previous times would have been considered incapable. It’s a GOOD thing, on the whole, but it enormously ups the pressures on the system.

          • demidaemon

            I don’t disagree. Even some of my current students have said that it was easier to get a GED than it was to complete high school. I’m not saying that these students aren’t intelligent; in fact, I think, as critical thinkers (which is now something else I need to assess, Jesus)–this may be my best batch left. In a way, I am teaching the basics–I am teaching how to write, with proper grammar and ways of organizing thoughts. I think some students don’t test well; others do.

            But it sure doesn’t help when you only answer half the questions on the test.

          • formerlyAnon

            You can’t teach common sense. *sigh*

          • demidaemon

            *SIGH*

          • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ foodycatAlicia

            When I was at high school, there were some kids who just weren’t particularly academic who would bunk off class and spend most of the day helping the school gardeners – and it was acceptable and would lead to good references and a job eventually. Now even people with no particular academic aptitude have to shove themselves into the higher education box instead of being able to do what they are good at. As you say, it is a good thing that more people can get an education, but I am not sure that it serves peoples needs any better than previous systems.

      • Carrps

        It looked like leftover Caesar salad that had been left out overnight.

    • Lorelski

      I am enjoying “Under the Gunn”! It moves along swiftly and there seem to be a lot of good designers on the teams. Some entertaining personalities as well. The mentoring aspect helps bring in an educational aspect, so I’m learning something. Even Nick’s micromanaging is kind of fun to watch. The judges are not as bitchy. And I don’t miss Heidi one bit.

  • marlie

    SO. EXCITED. for Tuesday!

    So, Philly Kittens, did we figure out if/where we’re going to meet up before/after?

    This kitten is about to pass out after working a 12-hour day. I know, plenty of people do it every day, but I’m not used to it, AND that’s after pulling 2 all-nighters during the week. The good news is that my project was finished just under the wire. The bad news is that I’m pretty sure I’m going to pass out now and sleep until Tuesday just to be conscious for the book signing.

    I hope everyone has a relaxing weekend, and maybe I’ll see some of you on Tuesday!

    • SRQkitten

      marlie, here’s to being DONE with projects being finished! I’ll buy a round to celebrate as my own project is finally finished after working in the office both Saturday and Sunday and working late every freakin’ night this week. Missed Under the Gunn. But am really looking forward to the uncles’ book!

      Wouldn’t our kindly uncles consider a FL visit? I think you might need it after that trip to the MN mall!

    • altalinda

      Very excited for Tuesday!

    • MilaXX

      I was hoping for a pres-signing meetup but plans have changed for me.

      • marlie

        Bummer! Hopefully we’ll still get to say hello. We should have a secret Bitter Kitten symbol. I’ll have to think of something…

        • MilaXX

          Once you see my fonzie bear coat you’ll know it’s me. I’ll be the short, fat chick with the dreadlocs and purple glasses.

          • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

            Gee, that’s weird, Mila, ’cause I always pictured you as very tall. Don’t know why.

          • MilaXX

            I wish. I’m barely 5’3″

          • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

            That’s almost tall to me. I used to be 5’2″, but age seems to have stolen an inch. I hope it doesn’t come back for more.

          • MilaXX

            Actually I’m 5’2 3/4″. The doctor said I could call it 5’3″.

          • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

            We lie about our age and weight, why not our height?

          • SierraDelta

            Mila, in my head you like exactly like (Tatiana Maslany’s) Cosima in Orphan Black. She’s 5’4″.

          • MilaXX

            LOL, That’s sweet, but not even close.

          • SierraDelta

            And purple gloves?

          • MilaXX

            lol, Probably not purple gloves. They clash with the fonzie bear. I have a pair of brown plaid for that coat.

          • SierraDelta

            You have plaid gloves?! You’re my hero, Mila!

  • 1carmelita

    So happy for you both!! I will definitely have to get my lazy NoVa behind into DC on the 20th to say congrats in person.

  • guest2visits

    What an interesting and exciting time for you guys, a lot of work, a lot of hustle – all the good kind! It’s a really wonderful thing.
    I enjoy reading up on the events of day for the BKs at large in their respective worlds too; so many talented & hardworking & really amazing individuals….

  • YouAlreadyKnow

    I. LOVE. YOU. GUYS.

  • radcl033

    Hi. I’m a TLo lurker. I read every post and comment while never contributing…..until now. As a Minnesotan and MoA resident (yes, residing within a mall. THE Mall.), I am FREAKING PUMPED. Thank you, TLo. :)

    • tallgirl1204

      So how does that work, living in the Mall? Are there condos there now? I moved away from fabulous Mpls 19 years ago and I suppose it has all changed…

      • radcl033

        Hahahaha……there are no *legal* residences with MoA. Lemme clarify. And that’s why I’m a lurker and not a poster.

        • guest2visits

          Intriguing. With the potential for a future screenplay perhaps…..?

        • Call me Bee

          No–but when my daughters both lived in Mpls, they were at the Mall …Every. Single. Sunday. Almost like living there…

      • SierraDelta

        You can get married in the Mall of America!

    • @Biting Panda

      Helllooooo silent lurker. : )

      • formerlyAnon

        Party over? Contagion spread?

    • Swiftlytiltingplanet

      I am considering the possibility of actually voluntarily going to the mall for the Uncles. They are, without a doubt, worth it. But The Mall. (I sent my Tim Gunn book with friends…)

    • http://www.GiftedCollector.com/ The Gifted Collector

      Welcome, ex-Lurker. Now that you’ve made the leap to commenting, you’ll find that it’s addictive.

    • KateShouldBeWorking

      Holy shit, MN Kittens! TLo and Bill Nye will be at MoA on the same day!

  • formerlyAnon

    Today’s been busy in my decidedly not Celebrated-Bloggers-and-Authors life. With two weeks of “fasten your seat belts, full speed ahead” upcoming.dd I DO hate having to pump myself into a medium-warm pitch of productivity for more than a day or two. Ah well, worse things happen to better people every damn day, oh yes they do.

    But that’s probably why I want to say “Harbor your strength, Uncles T & Lo, we clamor for additional signings with little regard for your energies.” Hope you’ll be able to pace yourselves. Sympathies to the cats, who must view your travels with disapproval.

  • guest2visits

    Still hanging in there for Under the Gunn. It’s not easy. I do like the brighter RW. I have often wondered why Tim doesn’t give a little more in his mentoring advice, sometimes he’s been almost unhelpful to the designers, although it could be how he’s edited. NICK however…. really showed what a little too much help can look like. He had so much enthusiasm for the challenge it was almost a riot. The only thing he didn’t do was jump behind one of the machines. I believe he was truly trying to give his all; and concerned that his team of designers deliver something RC appropriate. Surprisingly, Mondo had helpful advice, and both Anya and Mondo seemed more confident in letting their designers go their own way.
    I liked Oscar, Natalia and Camila’s best. I don’t buy the judges excuse that Camila’s would be too difficult to photograph for a magazine. Please. It may have had points off for very minor construction issues but several of the others had bigger fit or construction gaffs. They even dinged her for single wrinkle. They REALLY wanted her gone. I also liked Nickolas(?) black string dress, and Brady’s very un-RC 2 piece. I loved Shan’s print and the idea for the suit but it went cartoon when the boobs became the biggest feature. I think he could have won if the fit hadn’t turned around on him. It just wasn’t the same design.
    I thought it either Michelle or Stephanie for the auf. Absolutely thought Sam had one of least attractive designs, I don’t mind the idea of jumpsuit for the RC, and I love the fabrics he chose, but I hate the awkward lines and the weird fit. Just an odd kind of overall.

    • MilaXX

      I stopped midway thru the second episode

      • guest2visits

        I completely understand. The first 2 episodes were headache inducing.
        Curiosity about wth the show is trying to do has kept me for a little while.

    • BuffaloBarbara

      I’m hanging in there, too. It’s not great television, but at least so far, there’s not a lot of “drama,” which is a relief. I don’t feel like the mentor competition adds much, but it doesn’t subtract much, either. It’s a time-killer.

      And Nick, while going overboard, was kind of adorable.

      • guest2visits

        That’s true, not great – mildly entertaining. The addition of the mentor angle is more annoying than interesting. Because it becomes partly their story and really I think that’s what AllStars is for. One of best things were fewer contestants right from the start, but now we have 3 extra mentors contributing straight through the entire show.
        And I know UTG doesn’t want it portrayed as such – but these are TEAMS. At least in the minds of the mentors who are vying for that nice prize package (especially to Mondo & Anya)…..

    • Qitkat

      I’m not watching, or missing it. I guess I was thinking it would just be too predictable and formulaic. And my love for TG and Mondo has diminished I suppose. But The Fashion Fund is pretty good, on the Ovation Channel if you get it. Some of us BKs are watching it.

      • guest2visits

        I would love to see The Fashion Fund but our carrier (Consolidated) doesn’t have Ovation on it’s menu. I don’t see it on Hulu either. All I’ve been able to view are 2-4 minute clips. If there’s another outlet for it – I’m all in.

        • Qitkat

          :(
          I don’t want to get specific, but there are ways to stream, and not download. Just sayin’. I have no shame when it comes to wanting to see something I can’t find anywhere else.

          • guest2visits

            I’m going to see if there’s a how-to on YouTube or Google… possibly find a tip from those better schooled than me!

          • Qitkat

            When you do figure it out, be sure to use Adblock. It makes all the difference.

        • Lisa_Co

          I think I read that Ovation is putting TFF on their website the day after it airs. Try looking for it there.

  • boweryboy

    I pre-ordered my copy today and I’m excited for my gifts.

  • unbornfawn

    So delighted to see the two of you being rewarded for all the pleasure this bitter kitten has been having over the years reading your blog for free. Can’t wait for my copy of the book to arrive. A good week. I’ve been sewing, of all things Poodle costumes.

  • rainwood1

    Keep poledancing, T Lo! It will all be worth it when you hit the NYT bestseller list the first week.

    I will be having an equally glamourous weekend, spending Saturday cleaning out all the crap from the house my mother has lived in for 60 years. Her late husband didn’t throw anything away – except for food – in the last 25 years. The man is as irritating in death as he was in life. Yes, I went there. I’m putting the B in BK this weekend.

    • piperkitty

      I do not envy you that chore. Went through the same thing last year. I found a receipt from some innocuous knick knack bought in 1973. Spent one whole day (6:30 am to 4:30 pm) shredding papers. You have my sympathy.

    • Qitkat

      Whenever I hear of someone having to do this, I flash back to doing it for my parents and my husband’s parents. It’s a mostly thankless, difficult chore, but sometimes a gem or two gets uncovered along the way. And I’m always reminded that I need to clean out my own home much better so my kids don’t face an overwhelming task at the worst possible time.

      No matter how difficult, give yourself credit for a job well done, and maybe a well-deserved drink or three to celebrate the monumental achievement cause I know how hard this is, especially when B.
      Hugs.

    • formerlyAnon

      Strength. Only a deadline that necessitated tipping entire rooms into a dumpster unexamined could have allowed us to clear out my mom’s house in a day – or a week. She had a lovely ’60s house with good-sized rooms and lots of storage space. Full basement, half-finished attic.

    • decormaven

      So feel your pain- been there and done that. Be ruthless. We did piles of “keep, donate, toss.” Goodwill was only a half mile away, and there was a dumpster outside her apartment. We gave a LOT of stuff to her caregiver, who was glad to share with others. It’s just stuff- push through it. Hugs to you.

    • Shibori Girl

      I will be thinking about you – been there, done that! The good news is that I am really going through my stuff (at 64, so not THAT old) so no one has to spend weeks of clean up for me.

      Hang in there!

      • SierraDelta

        Cleaning out my mother’s house so that she and my aunt could move to a Continuing Care Retirement Community made me absolutely ruthless about our “stuff” when I got back to my own home. It’s a thankless — but sadly necessary — task that leaves you emotionally and physically drained, and I don’t think it’s fair to leave it for our sons and daughters-in-law.

        The kicker is that my mother’s house didn’t sell back in 2008 (thank you, U.S. economy), so she’s spent the last six years reaccumulating what we worked so hard to get her to part with then. I guess I’ll get to do it all over again when the time comes. . .

        • decormaven

          Virtual hugs to you. Enjoy time with mom while you can. Totally agree about keeping our own collections in check. My mom’s death three years ago has had me culling my own things with a sharper blade.

  • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ foodycatAlicia

    Well, it’s a good thing I have no street cred to lose, because I am going to a Taylor Swift concert tonight .

    • formerlyAnon

      Bwahahahaha!

      I hope you – or whomever you’re escorting – enjoys. I’ve found that wildly successful singers whom I don’t really appreciate musically sometimes have extremely entertaining stage shows.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ foodycatAlicia

        That is what I am hoping for. I am escorting a 9 year old and her mother. We’re in a hospitality suite so I am hoping there will be comped beverages to ease the pain!

    • alyce1213

      Hey, why not? Sounds like fun. Especially the hospitality suite part.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ foodycatAlicia

        Open bar. Yeah baby!

    • Janet B

      I hope you found it more enjoyable than you expected. My brother took his daughter (and her friends) to a Taylor Swift concert and said it was surprisingly enjoyable.

      • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ foodycatAlicia

        “Surprisingly enjoyable” it was. She puts on a good show! At one point I started to tally how many times she did *that* face that she does, but I decided it was churlish so I stopped. I don’t think you need to change frocks between every song and talking to teenage girls about heartbreak is shooting fish in a barrel but it wasn’t bad.

        • formerlyAnon

          Glad to hear it! You are a good person for striving to avoid churlishness.

  • jilly_d

    Bloomington road trip! I was worried you boys might not be swinging through the midwest, but my fears were unfounded. My BFF and I will be hauling the mail up I35 to partake in this blessed event!

  • MarieLD

    As a bitter kitten who has been reading your blog since it was two separate blogs, I say brag all you want!
    You sent us to the Cosmo site… sigh. I’ve now looked at sparkly men’s figure skating outfits, skaters who look like they’re having sex, “ugly” braids, and have read the word “p*nis” too many times to count. But I haven’t found your article yet. I must keep at it.

    • Qitkat

      I gave up on the Cosmo site. Too much cringing. I’ll haul myself to B&N soon, and look at the hard copy.

  • NMMagpie

    I will definitely be picking up that issue of Cosmo; I direct a lot of people looking to build good blogs and web presences here. :)

    As to Under the Gunn: wow… the wrong designer won the challenge. Blaine’s gown was really spectacular. I am not sure about this judging panel (read: instant dislike) but I am hanging in there. Nick deserved to get dumped on. When all his team’s looks were displayed together, all I could see was a lot of overwork. Not great.

    I like that you can see how much mentoring can affect a final product and that will keep me checking in.

    • Sarah

      Yeah, showing all the mentor’s work together was really enlightening. And I agree with wrong win – and wrong loser too – green dress should’ve been OUT.

      • NMMagpie

        I agree on that, too. That was just an ugly mess.

  • Sarah

    Tomorrow is not only the big football game and the day of my favorite marmot (he is tattooed on my back, I love him so well!) it is also my father’s 70th birthday. His dad, my grandpa, died when he was 70, so I can’t help but think about that, and how Dad and I haven’t been the best of friends, and how I should really get over it, regardless of apologies that I’m never going to get, and forgiveness that I don’t really feel. Sigh. I would heartily prefer not to have to deal with FEELINGS but they keep BOTHERING me. So preferable to think about fabulous book tours, fashion, cocktails, and exotic vacations (this last is coming from jealousy toward my cousin’s family that is going to Argentina in a couple of weeks.) At least I can have the cocktails. Which around my house is called “beer.”

    • demidaemon

      I hope it’s fancy beer!

      • Sarah

        Natty Ice when we’re really broke, Bud Light when we’re doing okay. And the fella likes him a deuce or a 40 now and again. So, no, not so much. I do enjoy a So Co and ginger when I get out, but that’s fairly unusual in these lean times.

        • demidaemon

          Yeah, I understand. It’s been forever since I’ve had a good stiff drink. I prefer a rum and coke or rum and Dr. Pepper myself. The only beer I’ve had that I liked was, I think, some brand of peach beer that wasn’t terribly expensive. I don’t recall the name though.

          • Sarah

            Oh, I’m a hard core beer drinker. Hence conversation with Qitkat below re: losing weight. Many, many empty calories in the beers. Many. Many many many. A lot.

          • demidaemon

            My dad has just encountered that problem, though he tends to deny. I can see a noticeable difference, though. More beer + pot (and its resulting effects) + less physically strenuous work = noticeable weight gain.

            Everything in moderation and shit, I guess.

          • SierraDelta

            “Everything in moderation and shit, I guess.”

            May I embroider that on a virtual pillow for you, please?

          • demidaemon

            Go right ahead. We’ll bring it to every virtual lounge. :)

          • SierraDelta

            “Everything in moderation and shit, I guess” could be carved over the door of the virtual lounge. It would, of course, be properly attributed to you, demidaemon, and could be our officially unofficial motto.

          • demidaemon

            I would hope so! ;)

          • formerlyAnon

            Moderation is soooo dispiriting.
            The only thing more dispiriting than moderation is realizing that you prefer moderation to the effects of being immoderate – and that it was not always thus, in the halcyon days of yore.

          • SierraDelta

            Amen!

    • Coolekat

      Make things right with your dad before he goes. You will always be glad you did.

      • Sarah

        You are right, of course. I am doing my best. And thank you for the kind thought.

    • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ foodycatAlicia

      Hope the beer helps you deal with the feelings.

      And I am amazed that you have a favourite marmot.

      • Sarah

        Hehe. I called my mom “Marmot” when she was living, and groundhogs are the most common marmots in my neck of the woods, hence my love for them. She and I shared the belief that seeing one (alive) on the side of the road munching grass was good luck. I still think so, and that’s why I bear his image on my back – and for Mom.

    • formerlyAnon

      If you think you’d have regrets if your dad were to die this week, you need to do something about it. If not, then it’s optional – it sounds as if you give deference to the forms of family ties often enough to avoid a big obvious rift.

      Unsolicited suggestion time, but this works for me : If you think you want to do something about it, take a good block of time – at least a couple of weeks, up to a month – and every day sit down and free write for 15 or 20 minutes, starting with the idea of your dad, and your relationship with him in your mind. Every day, start there, write anything at all, even if it seems unrelated. No expectations. No requirements to “try” to do anything – review your history, forgive him, list your grievances. Just write whatever comes to mind from that starting point. Free write, no self editing, or as little as you can force yourself to do. [If it makes your skin crawl to sit with your head for that long, start with 10 minutes. Set a timer. It's doable. I SWEAR.]

      At the end of the period, you may want to read over what you’ve written but you don’t have to. Then revisit your idea of wanting to do something about the state of your relationship. You may be much clearer about what you want to do, or how to do it, or what you don’t want to do. Like I said, this works for me when I’m grappling with something.

      • Sarah

        Thanks, formerlyA. That is great advice. I am not sure about regrets, exactly, at least from my end. But I do know that he wishes for us to be at peace, and as I’ve mentioned before, there’s just no sense in being mad at an old man who can’t see the harm he’s done, and never will. I’ve written, I’ve spoken, I’ve argued, I’ve pled, and we still can’t agree. Now, I guess, is time for remembering I wouldn’t be on earth without him, and letting it all go.

        • formerlyAnon

          If you’ve spoken, argued and pled, you’ve done way more in the way being emotionally honest with him than anyone in my family is comfortable with! So it’s more down to whether he needs you to tell him that you’re at peace with him or if it would just be okay to (and possible to) interact in a way that allowed him to believe you’re at peace with him, and whether you’d be o.k. with that.

          Good luck. I’m not good at letting things go. I mostly have to get to where I can ignore them for a long time – and then when I re-visit, I find I have let them go without realizing, simply by moving on. But that’s kind of chancy, takes a long time, and is not so easy when it’s a relationship so at the core of who one is as the relationship with a parent.

          • SierraDelta

            My mother sounds a lot like Sarah’s father. She’s a charming woman who gives all her affection to strangers — the checkout lady at the supermarket, the secretaries in her doctors’ offices, her cleaning lady — but she won’t allow herself to be vulnerable to her children and grandchildren. She doesn’t even realize that she’s made the choice to be emotionally distant (or even unavailable) to the ones who long to love her the most.

            She makes decisions capriciously and without regard to the hurt and chaos she’s causing; if she’s unable to feel an emotion, she discounts its existence. I’ve tried talking to her face to face, and I’ve written her letters, but she never acknowledges them and never responds. She never accepts responsibility for problems she’s directly responsible for, and in her own mind she’s never wrong. She’s dismissive of new technology in general and completely closed to new ideas. What I’ve realized is that that’s her nature, and she apparently can’t or won’t change because she can’t see any reason to.

            It’s a cliche, but I can’t change her, I can only change the way I react to her. I try to appreciate the goodness in her, even if it’s not directed my way, and to allow that maybe she makes a difference in someone else’s life. She’s also been my template for child rearing — if she did it one way, I made sure to do it the opposite way. As a result, my (grown) children are healthy, strong, opinionated, generous, thoughtful, caring human beings. My sibs and I are all damaged to varying degrees, and we’re all works in progress. My husband has been my salvation — a beacon of normalcy and a reminder of how to love our children with open arms.

            There’s a kind of wisdom somewhere in here, but it’s definitely wisdom for the pain. For what it’s worth, I admire what you’re trying to do for your father, Sarah. I think you can take comfort in knowing that you’re giving him the best that you have, and that’s all anyone has the right to ask for.

          • Sarah

            You have done everything you can, it sounds like, and come out stronger! Little different for me – not a distant parent, but rather a narcissistic one. Plenty of showered affection when it suited his needs, but always revoked when you really needed it. I don’t have kids, but I know for sure my sibs have practiced the “opposite parenting” thing with their kids, and it works! We did have a perfect mother, so that helped. And for me and my sister, the old adage that you look for someone “just like your father” proved to be “exactly as opposite from your father as possible.” We can change our reactions, yes, and in doing so, hopefully not bring ourselves needless pain from situations that won’t change.

          • SierraDelta

            My father was a perfect parent, too, but he died before I hit my teens. I remember him better and more clearly than my sibs do, and I think that’s made a tremendous difference in my life. He’s always been present for me, and he’s always been my role model for parenthood — well, actually, for everything I’ve ever done.

            I wonder if the death of a spouse has such a devastating impact on the survivor that the skills you were just learning go out the window because parenting alone is too awful to face?

            Anyway, I’ve been confessional enough for one weekend. My profound gratitude to all you Kittens for letting me ruminate.

            Sarah, you’re in my thoughts and prayers. I wish you peace.

          • Sarah

            Thanks, Sierra. Same to you, honestly.

        • SierraDelta

          I second that.

    • Qitkat

      I’ve been thinking about what you have posted here, and I just want to add that I second formerlyAnon’s advice. It has a lot of wisdom and common sense. And since you yourself also seem to possess those qualities, I know that you will find the approach that works best for you, the one that you will be able to look back on years from now, and know that you did the very best you could under trying circumstances, and that you have honored your mom by showing compassion where possibly none was reciprocated, and that you are the bigger person for it. You will be able to live comfortably with your decisions, and not have regrets, whatever you choose to do, that is the most right thing for Sarah to do in your heart. You are the only one who knows what that is.

      • formerlyAnon

        Well said.

      • Sarah

        Thanks, Qitkat. It means a lot to know you care. My best approach for now is to remember that I was raised to forgive and to try to love all the goodness and beauty in the world, so I’m doing my best.

  • demidaemon

    My “boss” was out Thursday, so that was a good day. She has been making the rounds lately, but I’m hoping business will pick up next week. That way, I can claim I am “busy,” and I won’t have to see her.

    The bad news is that Tuesday is our secretary’s last day (she got a new job which will be a less horrible commute for her, which I can’t really blame her for), and we will be mostly secretaryless for a while. I did get her a nice card and a $25 Amazon gift card as a duo “Congrats” and “Good Luck” present. I’m going to miss her terribly, though. :(

    • decormaven

      Hope there’s a new secretary in the wings. Good of you to honor former secretary’s work.

  • Anna

    Congratulations! So jealous of the BKs in the book signing cities and I can’t wait to get my copy. My co-pilot has had the flu all week so I’ve had to train alone, not the end of the world but having company early on a Saturday morning while it’s snowing is preferable. I did pass someone who was ahead of me though (that only usually happens with walkers and when I first started, they used to pass me), so that’s what I’m bragging about.

    I am not a football fan but I am making chili. I will, however, watch Tom Hiddleston’s Jaguar commercial for the Super Bowl. Again, and again, and again.

  • largishbearishAtlish

    I assume its due to all the wonderful book related goodies- but no coverage of the Tim Gunn/PR show? No bitterness for Anya no-sew, Mondo and the other guy who is waaaaay overmentoring? (and who knew, there is a Swatch in Mood-L.A. named ‘Oscar’!)

  • Jacob Bowen

    Ooooooooo The Mall of America is only 6 hours from my house, except I have Gay Choir on Sundays!!!! Chicago Kittens we NEED to get TLO here!!!!!

  • MilaXX

    Finally catching up on The Fashion Fund. Love this show! Has anyone watched the google gang outs when the first siring happens? I keep missing it.

  • CeeQ

    Once again I plead – please please do come to Chicago! It is freezing cold here but I promise I will be there to meet you with my mouth open ala Jessica Simpson in all her photos, trying to figure out what to say without sounding like a stalker.

    I’m doing fine – had an extremely lazy Saturday and loved it. Been working late all month long and on the weekends so I am so damn happy it’s finally over. One co worker though is making me feel the stress-y feeling in my stomach so I’m doing my best to ignore it and take it at my own pace =) Look forward to the book, dears! Go on with your pole dance! If we have to put up with endless celeb pole dancing with every film release we should at least get to throw some attention on a couple we actually love and give a real fuck about. Whoops, that sounded way more crass than I intended but you get it! xx

  • Dawn Sinclair

    Dear Uncles,

    Why thank you for asking. I’m going fine – apart from the rather ‘fun’ bug I caught from The Cub, it’s kick started the diet if nothing else.

    I would DEARLY luff you to come over to Dear Old Blighty and do some pole dancing over here. I’ll even look after your tassels for you. Am luffing the write up your journey btw.

    Sincerely
    A British Bitter Kitten :D

  • yellowhannah33

    I’ve said it before, and I’ll darnin’ well say it again: LONDON ON THE BOOK TOUR!

  • UsedtobeEP

    T & Lo, a belated congratulations on your first book finally coming. It’s fun to have it in your hands finally and see your names on the cover. You will never again be convinced that they should replace print books with Kindles.

  • OrigamiRose

    Awww you two better come to Boston so you can meet the real Jessica Rabbit :)

    I’ve been singing Cher anthems to the kitty. Why hasn’t “You Haven’t Seen the Last of Me” become her greatest hit? Sheesh :/

    I should add, I don’t think the cat really is impressed with my singing but as I keep telling him, “Would you rather I Anna Karenina’d on your fat furry ass?”

    Oh, and I found my longtime boyfriend (13+ years) has an online dating profile. I found that yesterday. 2014 can suck my balls :(

    • formerlyAnon

      Well damn. Sounds like 2014 is going to start out as rough sledding, but I wish you the company of friends and clarity of purpose as you sort things out with the skating-on-veerrrrry-thin-ice boyfriend.

      • OrigamiRose

        Thank you hon :)

        I took a hammer to a framed picture of him earlier… it was a surprisingly satisfying exercise.

        • formerlyAnon

          Ooooh, that sounds like it felt good. And since it’s technically your picture, no secondary arguments over it. (I’ve always longed to be “that bitch” who destroyed/gave away/sold/”lost” an errant partner’s stuff, but my break ups have always been either too trivial or too serious – or maybe I just don’t have that kind of emotional expressiveness in me.)

          • OrigamiRose

            Oh it felt sooooooooooooo good. I’m going to mail the debris to him. Now, he’s not getting back the dresses or heels, but everything else? :)

          • OrigamiRose

            Oh and here’s a howler from his dating profile: “I treat women with respect.”

            You can’t make that shit up.

          • formerlyAnon

            No. You can’t make it up.

          • OrigamiRose

            I have to calm down, right? I mean, the woman who loses it and lights his shit on fire isn’t amusing in reality, right?

            Life is easy, we just make it hard sometimes”; ‘I keep things in perspective”;[I] Cause no harm to myself or others.

            Yeah, whatever, asshat searching for a breeder girl fifteen years younger than me.

          • formerlyAnon

            Those poor unsuspecting women. That sort brings his own disasters with him. (I subscribe to the “once a cheater, always either a cheater or a restless, dissatisfied partner who is scared to cheat but not happy monogamous” theory. I’m sure there are exceptions.) And he sounds not just like a cheater. You’ve got proof he’s not just a frail human who gave in to desire in a weak moment, but a systematic player of a double game. Who quite possibly also passive aggressive and relieved you found out because at the rate he’s going he’d be breaking up with you as he gave you an invitation to his wedding.

            And, I dunno. In the cold, cold, light of dawn, I’ve never really been that satisfied when I tried for the destructive dramatic gesture. So probably you shouldn’t. Especially not with fire. Especially not while angry. Or drinking.

            Though I’d be sore tempted to “lose” a favorite shirt. See if the jerk had the nerve to ask about it.

          • OrigamiRose

            I went out for a walk after finding his profile yesterday morning, and I still had to email people and say, “Keep the sharp objects and the Bridget Jones movies away from me!”

          • formerlyAnon

            If you can joke about Bridget Jones movies you’re gonna be o.k. ;-) Still sucks, though.

          • OrigamiRose

            Honestly, I don’t think I’ve been in any movie *but* BJD where the audience was *so* in tuned to what was happening on screen. I mean, when she started belting out, “All By Myself” in her jammies while holding a glass of wine, I thought, “OMG, who has been filming me?!?!??!”

  • OrigamiRose

    Omg dear PSH… he was my role model. I haven’t sobbed over a celebrity passing since Audrey Hepburn.

  • Melanie

    I am sooo excited you are coming to Minnesota!! I saw Tim Gunn at the M.O.A. and now my dream has come true with you guys! I am totally taking the day off from work to meet you two! :)

  • formerlyAnon

    Hot damn! Just got the Amazon notification that my pre-order has shipped!

    (Yeah, like probably a . . . . WHOLE LOT of the people who read this blog. Still, it was a little thrill in a virtuous hard working day.)

    ETA: My pre-order of The Book, of course! Somehow I just felt that was implied.

    • Qitkat

      Apparently my head has been stuck in a bowl of diet soup or something because until I read this earlier tonight, I had totally forgotten to order my own copy. But now I have, 20 minutes ago. After the humiliating defeat of the Broncos (and I don’t even like football), and Downton Abbey and Sherlock. Too much TV.
      Thanks for the reminder ;)

  • foxysquirrel

    Oh.mah.gah. The gay uncles are coming to MN! Sadly, I have a hockey game and can’t come see you at MOA.

  • queeniethebold

    i preordered my copy of the book months ago. In the meantime, my credit card has been compromised TWICE and my bank has had to issue me two new cards in quick succession. Amazon notified me today that i needed to update my card info with them if i wanted to receive my order in a timely way. Well, YAIS!

    Here in the Piedmont of North Carolina, with no hope of getting to NY or Philly anytime soon (though i used to travel to NY quite a bit). Would give just about anything for a signed copy, but since that will never happen, i’m just tremendously excited about awaiting my copy to arrive. Squeeeee!

  • CatherineRhodes

    TLO are not only the best bloggers on the web but the most prolific. How do they have time to post 8-10 posts a day, more during awards season, blog a bunch of TV series, live-tweeting some, attend NY Fashion Week, get married AND write a book??? I’m getting tired just writing this. TLO has enough energy to power a small metropolis.

    • formerlyAnon

      I know. I’m waiting for the day the big announcement comes that they’re cutting back on all the TLo goodness because nobody should be working all the hours that God gives. (I do hope they at least *try* interns first.)

  • CatherineRhodes

    One more thing: to the Bitter Kittens who recommended The Fall — thank you! I watched over the weekend and the show was amazing. I’m going to rewatch all five episodes next weekend because I can’t stop thinking about it. That is the best thing I’ve seen recently on television.

  • Jessica O’Connell

    Oh man, we can’t get our book signed in DC unless we present a B&N receipt for it? But…but… I pre-ordered it on Amazon! TLo, how upset would you be if I bought a second book at B&N so that I can get my book signed…but then immediately return it because, while I love you, I really can’t afford to be buying two copies of every book, no matter how much I love it….

    Any other Bitter Kittens have better ideas to solve this problem?