Jemima Kirke in Vintage at the “Girls” Premiere

Posted on January 07, 2014

We feel bad. We’re always yelling at the other Girls girls and we never seem to take the time to yell at her.



Jemima Kirke attends the “Girls” season three premiere at Jazz at Lincoln Center in New York City in a vintage dress from New York’s Geminola boutique.

Enh. We’re all for satiny vintage ’30s Harlow-style gowns, but this looks cheap and there’s a massive titscrepancy. The detail on the bodice looks like a championship wrestling belt. The hair and makeup are kind of pretty, but that dress is a big pile of awkward.




[Photo Credit: Diane Cohen/FAMEFLYNET PICTURES]

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  • Gerry Coleman

    Titscrepancy. Amen!

    • Rachel Simpson


      ☸☸ ☸☸☸ ☸☸☸☸ ☸๵☸☸ ☸☸☸☸ ☸☸☸☸As it stands, the titscrepancy makes it impossible to focus on anything else. Do these girls not believe in tailors?

  • Bexxx

    This is exceptionally bad. This is like a last minute Party City Princess Buttercup costume.

    • decormaven

      Nailed it!

    • SportifLateBoomer

      OUCH that burned! But so spot on.

  • Nika E

    What in gay hell?

  • ShaoLinKitten

    If she could have had the bust altered so it fit like a glove, I would have liked it. As it stands, the titscrepancy makes it impossible to focus on anything else. Do these girls not believe in tailors?

    • MilaXX

      more importantly why are they all so anti boob support? Is it against the hipster cred to have your boobs looking good?

      • ShaoLinKitten

        That is a good question. Is there some bra-phobia going on? But is that the problem here, or is it the poor tailoring of the top? It seems like if it were fitted snugly to her chest and not left in a droopy, pouchy state, it would look good and would support her.

      • MK03

        Because bras are, like, so 1999.

        • MoHub

          Or 1959

        • tereliz

          Then they should be back in style again, lol.

      • decormaven

        Those who eschew proper foundation wear at an early age will pay dearly for such non-support. I guess the modern way is to just get them lifted surgically, but that’s a bit extreme. [rolls off for bingo in the activity room…]

        • Deb Oswald

          hehehehe ^5

        • Stargatefan

          No they wont: Bras are not needed in order to keep the girls up and firm: muscles are all that is needed. But I do agree that freeballing in a flimsy dress might not be the best idea for purely aesthetic reasons.

      • Introspective

        those girls live to freeball all public appearances. and im just not sure why. maybe its contractual?

  • Looks like someone has been doodling on her.

    • charlotte

      The tattoos make her look dirty in a literal way.

      • Pekoepie

        They really do don’t they? She looks grubby.

      • Introspective

        around my way we call those prison tats.

        girl just looks hiddy though. the tattoos are the least of her troubles right now.

  • Sobaika

    Drunk and underdressed.

  • hughman

    So many questions.

    “Exactly how tall ARE you? Are your breasts in a gang war with each other? Why do you have a pillow taped to one hip?”

    • demidaemon

      “Which championship did you win? Do you have to defend it tonight in an evening gown match so you didn’t want to spend too much money on it? Were you scripted to lose so it tears away easy?”

      So many questions indeed.

  • oklund

    Love her “permanently slightly drunk” look. The RC needs Jemima, that one girl who doesn’t care in the absolute right way.

    • Katesymae

      I agree about Jemima, but it’s too bad no one in the Girls cast can get it together on the RC.

  • LeelaST

    My first thought was nightgown. And my second…

  • Pennymac

    Fay Wray wore this better when clasped in Kongs’ sweaty monkey paw. Its bad.

  • TrixieConQueso

    Does everyone know that Her Mother designed this? Sigh. Such a cutie – a better fit and I would like it.

    • bitchybitchybitchy

      Did her mom really design this? If so, I wish they’d put their heads together to fit it properly.

      • Peta Jones

        Her mom owns Geminola. It’s a vintage boutique, so most likely she didn’t design this. If you check out Jemima via Wiki, it tells about other times she has worn clothing supplied by her mother’s store.

        • Monabel

          Maybe it was just borrowed, hence the safety pins. Then it can be put back on the floor.

          • bitchybitchybitchy

            That could well explain the poor fitting.

        • NYCGlamourpuss

          Welp, there you go. Never let your mom dress you, lady stars.

          • tereliz

            Don’t let Mama Knowles hear you say that…

        • TrixieConQueso

          Thank you for the correction – hate being wrong. I am putting on the Fashion Cone Of Shame and will Wiki before I post next time. 😉

  • @Biting Panda

    Shades of Lindsey Lohan.

    • decormaven

      Yep, it’s almost a dead ringer for that hiddy satin gown she wore last year. Ugh!

  • charlotte

    Nightgown much? Even Lena Dunham managed to wear a dress.

  • clatie

    Blanche Deveraux in her nightie EXCEPT Blanche had better hair + make-up

    • MoHub

      And boob support

  • lexilexi

    Dress, etc horrible…but her face is quite beautiful.

  • marlie

    1. She needs a bra.

    2. This looks like a 40s era negligee. I actually can’t believe that’s vintage, because it looks like a cheap reproduction.

    3. Her makeup looks fine, but it’s a little too casual and DIY.

    • Evan

      This is a perfect example that just because it’s vintage, doesn’t mean it’s any good.

  • Janet B

    A little more effort would have been nice.

  • Lex

    That’s totally her style though– she’s boho all the way. I think this suits her to a T, weird boobs hanging out and all.

  • I keep seeing SNL’s Kate McKinnon’s impression of her with a glass of wine in hand in a bathtub crying “I’m so bored!” Indeed.

  • ConnieBV

    Another girl who likes to pretend that she is artfully disheveled when really, that dress is one-of-a-kind (for a reason, perhaps, but still) and your bracelet is vintage. Quit pretending you don’t care and clean it up. This had potential to be a knockout and when AWilz is wiping the floor with you, something is wrong. Her hairpiece alone wins over anything Jemima has on.

    • Katesymae

      She’s the one member of the Girls cast I actually believe doesn’t care.

  • mellorcr

    And the way that bracelet dangles down on her hand makes it look as if the wrist on that side is massively swollen, in a “needs medical attetnion, stat!” kind of way..

  • Betsy

    Amen, Brothers T and Lo!! (Titscrepancy! Hilarious!!) If she’s going to wear her grandmother’s bias-cut silk-satin nightgown on the red carpet, someone at least needs to tell her how to adjust “the ladies” so they’re both pointing in the same direction!! And, by the way, one does not shlump and slouch in a vintage silk-satin nightgown (especially not with tangerine nails and little tattoo-scribbles all over). One *glides*, Muthahfuckah! In high-heeled marabou slippers and a silk chiffon negligee!!

  • d4divine

    She’s a big pile of sex…don’t care what she wears…the doll is HOT

  • nowlo

    Cheap, polyester satin nightgown found in the thrift store rummage bin.

    On the upside, that bracelet is cute.

  • Hilda Elizabeth Westervelt

    Yuck yuck yuck. Looks wrinkled and a bit smelly, like dirty satin bed sheets. Lady Galadriel’s old nightgown.

  • demidaemon

    She needs some TLo yelling. It’s just that the others are so awful/bland that she flew under the radar a bit. Now she too can be scared into getting a proper stylist. Cause girl needs some help, stat.

  • butterflysunita

    From the neck up she looks pretty. And I like her bracelet. But yes, she’s wandering around a premiere in a nightgown.

  • cocohall

    I read an interview with her somewhere and this look absolutely resonates with what little I remember from the article. Just a vague sense of someone who just couldn’t be bothered to give a f*ck about things that concern most other young lady stars. So for authenticity’s sake, you go girl! I think what’s missing is a bottle of whiskey and a blunt. If she were carrying those, the whole thing would come together. Maybe her PR people are holding them off-camera? She just looks ready to tie one on.

  • MilaXX

    You can tell she thinks she ‘s looking all Downton Abbey levels of vintage, but really she just looks like she’s wearing a nightgown from Forever 21

  • Morning-after Fiona Apple in a nightgown.

  • elzatelzabelz

    That isn’t a dress. It’s a nightie.

  • Holy Courtney Love!

  • lillyvonschtupp

    What decade is this from? It can’t be the 30s because women in films didn’t have tits, except Harlow.

  • lillyvonschtupp

    Love the bracelet, though.

  • Trickytrisha

    I’d swear the straps made shorter by safety pinning them in the front where they meet the dress. A dress looks like it’s been in a box in someone’s attic for the past 7 or 8 decades, shaken out and put on. Actually, scratch that.. it’s too cheap looking to be vintage.

    • Monabel

      You’re right, pretty sure there are safety pins.

      • marlie

        I hadn’t noticed that before. It’s inexcusable.

    • Sadly, if you define “vintage” as more than 20 years old, it could well be a polyester satin from the 1980s.

  • SewingSiren

    There’s the Rock Star’s daughter. Wearing a too small nightgown too.

  • Chickadeep

    THANK YOU. I saw a couple of glowing reviews of this ensemble and I was wondering what kind of crack the reviewers were smoking. Tragic, sag-tastic 1940s nightgown…all it’s missing is the peignoir with giant shoulder pads, the satin head wrap, and the maribou-trimmed satin mules.

    • Those elements would make it so fabulous though!

      • marlie

        Those elements would make it truly “ironic,” and could at least provide some visual interest.

      • Chickadeep

        Indeed, though perhaps not on the red carpet? I fear the sheer peignoir would not sufficiently mask the aforementioned titscrepancy

  • Pterodactyl111


  • Ann VerWiebe

    In the ’30s, she would have had a structured undergarment – even under a bias cut charmuese gown. Her boobs are just floating around somewhere in there.

  • MzzPants

    Aaand…..NO. What is up with this cast??

  • quiltrx

    It’s a pretty enough nightgown. Just missing the negligee and marabou mules.
    But it belonged to someone with a completely different body, who likely gave a shit and didn’t look so uncomfortable.

    • CatherineRhodes

      Yeah, and someone who wore it as a “nightgown.” Leaving the house in this thing is a disaster.

  • Jacob Bowen

    Looks like a nightgown from the Renaissance Faire.

  • vintage is vintage and a vintage nightgown is a nightgown. this is what we used to wear to the avalon ballroom after two hits of acid in ’68.

  • This reminds me of wearing my mother’s fancy Frederick’s of Hollywood Nightgown and pretending to be on a red carpet. I can’t let ten year-old me down and trash this look.

  • alyce1213

    Gee, it looked so sexy on the hanger.

  • amber.

    send it to rose mcgowan & let her do it better than you bye

  • Aaminah Khan

    Cross between the Adult Film Awards, a Renaissance Faire and grandma’s satin nightie. Not feeling it.

    • This is okay, but “stripper” isn’t?

      • Aaminah Khan

        “Adult Film Awards” = an event where a certain standard of dress is expected that would seem out of place elsewhere. I love my sex worker friends, but they don’t exactly wear their work gear off-duty.

        “Stripper” = a legitimate profession that keeps food on the tables of many women (and their families).

        Whorephobia = gross and bad, especially on a site that’s generally good about not shaming women and focusing on fashion.

        • Wow. So you really think there’s some sort of huge difference between saying a woman looks like a porn star and a woman looks like a stripper. Hope you didn’t strain something.

          A “certain standard of dress” is also expected of strippers, by the way. And we’re pretty sure porn stars also get paid and then use that money to put food on the table.

          Face it: you’re trying like crazy to draw a distinction where there isn’t one. Somehow, it’s perfectly okay for you to say an actress looks like a porn star but it’s “whorephobia” for us to say she looks like a stripper.

          • Aaminah Khan

            I think there’s a difference between saying someone looks like they’re heading to an awards ceremony for porn stars (i.e. not venue-appropriate) and using “stripper” in a derogatory way to describe a woman’s aesthetic. (Don’t even pretend it wasn’t derogatory when it clearly was.)

            I know both porn stars and strippers (and escorts, and brothel girls, and girls who work on the streets, and camgirls, and pretty much every other type of sex worker there is). I wouldn’t say “she looks like a porn star” as an insult because that’s whorephobic.

            This really isn’t that difficult to understand.

          • Outright and blatant hypocrisy is never difficult to understand, that’s true.

            You were not praising Jemima here when you said she looked like a porn star. In fact, you said you weren’t “feeling it,” which pretty much confirms that you didn’t like the outfit and thus, the porn star crack was not meant to be a compliment. It was as derogatory a statement as ours.

          • Aaminah Khan

            So…you admit that your statement was derogatory, but that’s okay, because you found a single instance of me saying something that could also be viewed as derogatory?

            Well, glad that’s all sorted. Stay feminist, dudes. I’m out.

          • No, I admit that my statement was derogatory (this site prides itself on being bitchy and opinionated) and am pointing out your intense and overwhelming hypocrisy for criticizing us when you made an almost identical comment. To bad you still can’t admit or respond to any of the points I made.

            Stay a hypocrite, dude!

  • Medieval shower curtain.

  • Tragic.

  • Ren Fair Lingerie.

  • Mars Tokyo

    Looks like a nightgown.

  • ModernDowager

    But I Must Have that bracelet

  • Judy_S

    I think it might have been part of her grandmother’s trousseau. For the wedding night.

  • Ginger

    My dad bought that exact same nightgown for my mom when I was little. No wonder they divorced…

  • Anna Vasquez

    Awww, she looks like the cool girl at my prom in 1998.

  • sagecreek

    I had a nightgown like that once.

  • Jaeda Laurez

    It’s a bit…Lazy Kat Denning-ish. She doesn’t have the boobs to make this work, and the bodice goes WAY too high. And the color is terrible on her.

  • Guest

    She looks like a DIY ren-fair harlot. No thank you.

  • carnush

    So bad. I get that’s she’s into vintage, but why this cheap-ass, wrinkled mess? It’s obvious that she gives zero shits.

  • leahpapa

    I’m all out of can’ts with that smug face.

  • Carolyne

    I’m confused by her pose. It seems like she’s jutting her right ribs out. Maybe she had a bad rib break that never healed correctly? Or is she storing her cellphone above her right hand there where that lump is?
    Aside from that, why oh why are the Girls girls always so awkwardly dressed? They’re a mystery to me….

  • CeeRich

    This is bad. REALLY bad,

  • boweryboy

    It looks cheap and ugly and that color is awful and it’s wrinkly and ill fitting and that side seam is a hot mess like she handsewn it while ssitting in the back of her limo. I hate it so much I just realized I typed a run on sentence.

  • MannahattaMamma

    I am so tired of all the girls of “Girls” and I’m tired of the show even though I’ve never seen it. Just eh aren’t you SO COOL with your tats and your slip-dress and “aren’t we all IRONIC” attitudes. Harumph.

    • Sunraya

      Yes, I know most people here probably disagree, but tattoos and red carpet gowns just seem so awkward together. I try to imagine Grace Kelly or Audrey Hepburn with tattoos down their backs or on their arms, and I just cannot imagine. Even someone like Nicole Kidman. I would be surprised if she, or Emma Stone, had tattoos. (Actually, I just read that Emma Stone got one with her mother to celebrate her victory over cancer. It is small.) But when I look at Lena Dunham with bare arms and her tattoos, it just seems to cheapen any gown she has on. JMHO. I am over 50. 🙂

    • decormaven

      Body art is so personal, but those are not art to me. I trust that they are meaningful to her.

  • Shawn EH

    Ill-fitting. She has the looks to rock some Blair Waldorf realness, this is just way too half-hearted.

  • Sunraya

    You guys must have taken your “Be Nice” pills today. I think this entire thing is skeevy looking. Like the Lindsay Lohan nightgown skeevy looking that makes me want to go take a shower. Yeech. Disheveled hair, big, red Joker lips, skewed think fabric. Yeech. Really. I don’t know who this girl is, but I think she needs a bath.

  • CatherineRhodes

    In order to pull off the nightgown-dress or slip-dress, it can’t look like an actual nightgown or slip, ie: it should not be beige, and it should not look like it was slept in.

  • Wendy Todd

    Aw…I had no idea she’s an ice skater!

  • NYCGlamourpuss

    Well, of course you never yell at her. She’s obviously sleeping, judging by the nightgown she has on, so you’d only wake her up.

  • Danielle

    Underwear. It’s underwear.

  • formerlyAnon

    Well, everybody’s more than covered the waterfront re: dress. I’ll echo whomever hoped the tats are meaningful to her because they’re not, by and large, aesthetically pleasing. (And I can love some body art. I’m not opposed in principle.)

    But the HAIR. I think I get what they were going for, but I think it looks ENTIRELY amateur hour. Like there were inexpertly applied hot rollers involved, and waaaay more bobby pins than a pro would need.

  • heartbot

    One of my mom’s slips in the 80s.

  • Lauren Dorsee Dillon

    Renn Faire Nightie. Send me a knight and I’ll bed him in it. 🙂

  • Jeannie Shmina Greenwald

    I’m sorry. If I was going to be photographed at an event and this was the best I could do I hope my sister or friends or someone would have lent a hand; an eye, a stylist, a tailor, something.

  • Presumptuous Insect

    So gross. Even I wouldn’t wear that, and I always look like shit.

  • Ma. Gabriella Dutari

    Her posture is helping here considering she’s not wearing a bra this could be worse. I think the worst is the make up, those lips look awful in the closeup! I’m guessing it’s some lipstain badly deployed.

  • Presumptuous Insect

    Those tattoos on her and the nepotism girl–hideous. Placed willy nilly like scribbles. Ugh.