Ariana Grande for Cosmopolitan Magazine

Posted on January 08, 2014

As elderly people, we really have no interest in Ariana Grande and we’re pretty sure she’s fine with that. But as fashion and pop culture bloggers, we do try and keep up with things.  We’ve been working for the longest time to come up with an opinion on her and can’t seem to.

Ariana Grande covers the February 2014 issue of  Cosmopolitan magazine  photographed by Matt Jones.

On being a positive role model: “I think I’m an old soul. What excites younger people doesn’t excite me… I’m kind of a boring, normal girl who likes Harry Potter and to sit in her pajamas and sing. A lot of my friends are partiers, but I’ve never really clicked with that. I like Barbra Streisand, and when was the last time you saw Babs getting, like, turnt up? That’s kind of the road that I, as a lady, would like to go down.”

On dealing with her Twitter haters: “Oh, they’re evil as hell! I don’t even block them anymore, because I feel like it’s giving them negativity in return. So I just let it happen and forgive them and move on. Those people are fighting their own battles.”


But isn’t she kind of designed to prevent the forming of strong opinions? Like a lot (all) of celebrities engineered for and marketed to the tween n’ teen crowd, she seems very much a product and not a person. The person part comes later, when her audience grows up and starts getting an education and she realizes two things: that she needs to reinvent herself to keep them interested and damn, it would have been nice to get an education. Look at Miley. Look at the Olsen twins. Look at Britney or Justin or Christina. She’s toothachingly sweet and twee, but somehow she doesn’t bother us on that front as much as someone like Taylor Swift does. We’re just glad she’s not dressing like a  cartoon version of a 12-year-old, which seemed to be her thing for a while. The last outfit’s kind of what you’d expect from her but the cover outfit and the second one look fantastic.

Full disclosure: OMG SQUEE!!!!!!!! 



[Photo Credit: Matt Jones for Cosmopolitan Magazine]

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  • savicevic

    She needs to find a new angle, though. Doesn’t anyone involved find it strange that she only ever shows half her face?

    • mmebam

      Right? Does she have a “hideous” birthmark on her right side, or something?

      • myristica_fragrans

        i read that she works that side because she likes to show off a dimple. it’s ridiculous and she needs to lower her damn brows.

    • gayle

      I am finding it entertaining she has already chosen her “best side” is really committing to it.

      • marlie

        Completely unrelated: I like how your name is spelled “correctly.” It’s my mom’s and my cousin’s name. :)

    • SophieCollier

      Well, with the side part, if she turned it the other way, she’d be a mound of hair. Or is this something she does even with a ponytail?

      • marlie

        Isn’t her ponytail usually on the side, too?

    • shanteUstay

      I heard she has a diva thing about only being shot on the left side

  • Anna Vasquez

    She looks like she’s constantly asking, “Is this okay? Is *this* okay? Like this?”

    • tereliz

      She never quite looks comfortable in front of the camera, does she? Like a puppy constantly begging for praise and expecting a kick.

    • Bridget Smith

      I can’t decide if she’s constantly raising her eyebrows or if they just grow that way.

  • foodycatAlicia

    I am so uncomfortable with lose-your-mind orgasm secrets being plastered over a girl whose default is cutesy teen, even if she is an “old soul”.

    ETA but they featured your book so I forgive.

    • marlie

      And “Fantasy SEX” right next to her face.

      • sleah_in_norcal

        well, at least that’s age appropriate. at that age, it should only be a fantasy.

        • foodycatAlicia

          She is 20!

          • sleah_in_norcal

            OMG she looks about 14! guess she’s way past fantasizing…

    • charlotte

      I’m convinced that those headlines are already a part of the editing format and cannot be removed.
      I mean every Cosmo cover is about orgasms, right?

      • decormaven

        I think it’s part of the Cosmo Credo that orgasms must be mentioned on every cover. I swear, this mag is the McD’s of publishing. Just like that those fries in “Supersize Me” – you could put a Cosmo from the 80s under a bell jar, and the cover would probably read much the same as this one. Even the “fashions” they show look completely ripped from an 80s Spiegel catalog.

        • demidaemon

          I guess it’s good that they are consistent?

    • Sarah

      Oh, yeah, she’s an old soul. She likes Harry Potter! ANCIENT. And wearing pajamas and singing! SO OLD SCHOOL. Because, you know, no one ever partied in “olden times.” They all sat around reading and singing in their sleepwear. And worshipping Barbra Streisand.

      • deathandthestrawberry

        Exactly. What teen girl doesn’t like to wear pajamas all day and sing and read Harry Potter. Please!

      • decormaven

        What scares me is what she considers “olden times.”

        • Sarah

          Sheesh, tell me about it. I just sat through a presentation at work where they covered all the acknowledged generations since the 20th century (Silent, Greatest, Baby Boomers, etc. etc.) in an attempt to help us view what it’s like for teens today. Mine (X, I guess they’d like to say) was TWO from the end – there’s a Y and a Z! – and they said we were responsible for making Jean Claude Van Damme popular and NKOTB was our favorite band. NOPE. *Shudders to think that’s what kids today think of as “old”*

          • marlie

            It’s painfully true. I’m right there with you.

          • Sarah

            I was pissed because of all the things this girl (who was Gen Y) doing the presentation could have said, she picked an actor and a band that made ZERO impact on my Gen X life. Gawd, can’t we at least claim Grunge or Depeche Mode or something? And River Phoenix?

          • marlie

            Or Pearl jam, or Nirvana… I don’t even LIKE Nirvana, but they seem like more of the musical “voice of our generation” that NKOTB. And to this day, I’ve never, ever seen a movie with Van Damme.

            EDITED: But NKOTB was when we were “tweens,” (a term that I’m pretty sure didn’t exist when we were that age), and PJ & Nirvana were the thing in our high school years.

          • Sarah

            ME EITHER. (And Nirvana & Pearl Jam count as grunge, but I know what you meant)

          • demidaemon

            I have seen at least one movie with Van Damme: Street Fighter, which is so bad it’s good, and sadly, Raul Julia’s last feature film. :(

          • marlie

            Oh wait… you did say “grunge.” I need my afternoon coffee.

    • NurseEllen

      I am right there with you, Alicia, on both counts.

    • demidaemon

      I love when they do readings of the “testimonials”from Cosmo on Chelsea Lately, because it shows just how ridiculous most of the shit in this magazine is.

  • jerseyginger

    Every single photo I’ve ever seen of her is the same, slightly turned head and a facial expression like she’s constantly mid-sigh.

  • Clueless_Jock

    I can’t distinguish her from Selena Gomez.

    • Supernumerary

      It’s as if Selena Gomez and Emmy Rossum had a twee lovechild.

    • Evan

      I don’t really listen to her music all that much, but this one can sing.

      • StelledelMare

        If anyone hasn’t, they should listen to the cast recording for the musical “13”. She definitely has a great set of pipes.

        • Jacob Bowen

          Thank you for knowing this also! I always feel weird being the only one!

  • @Biting Panda

    1 – Congrats to you two!!!

    2 – I really, really, dislike the image her team is going with. We’ve discussed it here, but they are going very far with the Lolita schtick with this one. She’s all short skirts, big boobs, and baby doll/breathless voice, doe eyed, innocence. It’s beyond creepy. And her speaking voice can drive me out of any room.

    3 – If we can see more of “I like Barbra Streisand, and when was the last time you saw Babs getting, like, turnt up? That’s kind of the road that I, as a lady, would like to go down.” in her appearances, I may tolerate her better.

    • foodycatAlicia

      What does “turnt up” mean?

      • Sobaika

        Drunk/high/etc. In a sentence: I saw Miley at the AMAs and she was too turnt!!

      • @Biting Panda

        Urban Dictionary : 1. Turnt Up
        – thee act of getting drunk and high to thee highest degree
        – getting loose {whether that be just being wild or engaging in sexual activity}

        AKA – Showing your drunk ass.

        • foodycatAlicia

          Thanks! I could have googled but too lazy. Now I am interested in the etymology, so I will have a look!

          • @Biting Panda

            It’s a daily goal of Miley’s….so again, they (her people) love to play the game.

            She’s a good girl. Who just happens to sound like a phone sex operator.

          • demidaemon


    • Qitkat

      Somehow there’s a massive disconnect for me (and full disclosure, I’ve never heard of her) between her claim of being an “old soul” and loving Harry Potter and referencing wanting to be just like Barbra Streisand using urban slang ‘when was the last time you saw Babs getting, like, turnt up.’ (Also a term I’ve never heard before.) Not being a party girl doesn’t make you an old soul. Eventually she may become less of a product, and more her own person. It may not be an unbumpy road though.

  • Sobaika

    She’s the one getting her Mariah on, yes? She’s sort of blandly adorable. It’s kind of hilarious to see Barbara Streisand and ‘turnt’ in the same sentence.

    • MilaXX

      yes she has a really great voice, but everything else about her triggers my gag reflex

  • Danielle

    My little brother has a THING for her. Still reeling over the fact that she’s twenty.

  • elleg929

    She looks confused on the cover.

  • quiltrx

    She’s a cute girl who seems to always have a glow about her. I have a feeling she keeps it pretty generic on the RC partially because she doesn’t want to come across too different from her character Cat. These look like clothes Cat would wear to a really fancy event.

  • kayleymaybe

    From all the pictures of her I’ve seen, it seems like she has a case of resting bitch-face.

    • Loola234

      It’s the brows – they’re constantly in the “No Way!” position…

      • marlie


  • MilaXX

    She looks mostly fine for this photoshoot, but on her own she still gives off a creepy toddlers & tiaras vibe. This shoot is a pretty good, but she still needs to lose the hair weave. It looks like it weighs more than her.

  • marlie

    I yawned so hard I hurt myself.

  • thecitysleeps

    I like her and I love her album tbh. But I love pop music.

    • demidaemon

      Don’t worry. This is a safe place. 😉

  • ashtangajunkie

    There seem to be a LOT of these gals around. Or they are all Ariana Grande. I either can’t tell them apart or they’re all the same person. Who knows?

    • marlie

      Who cares?

      (Who am I kidding… the bitter kittens care, just so much as to comment on what she’s wearing and why she’s relevant.)

    • foodycatAlicia

      They aren’t all Ariana Grande, but I think about 4 of them are.

    • Jessica Freeman

      I have no idea, and thankfully TLo have taken the helm on keeping us relevant to the up and coming generation of irrelevancy.

  • boweryboy

    Who? Because his elderly person is too lazy to Google her..

  • MoHub

    She looks like a pedophile’s wet dream.

    • @Biting Panda

      And with those 7 words, you’ve made the good people at Nickelodeon extremely happy. High fives all around their style team’s table.

      • demidaemon

        Sad, and yet oh so true. Of course, at 31, and from the results I usually get from dating online, I am probably a pedophile’s wet dream. And that makes me sad. Again.

        • demidaemon

          And why does Mozilla mark “pedophile” as an incorrectly spelled word?

  • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

    The vapid expression on her face makes me feel very stabby.

  • MannahattaMamma

    who IS she and why is she on the cover of a magazine? Feeling old as the crypt at the moment.

  • butterflysunita


  • Adriana

    She always looks confused/unsure of herself. Maybe it’s the raised eyebrows?

  • Anna_Cecilia

    At first glance, I thought this was Jessica Alba. As to what she will do when her audience inevitably moves on, well, she could always get a stainless steel kitchen and some appliances, condescendingly tell people where to buy their groceries and call it a “lifestyle brand.” I’m sure at some point, her name will be slapped on a cupcake-scented fragrance.

    I do like the second outfit.

    • decormaven

      Definitely count on a fragrance tie-in for this kid. She’s going to be marketed to the hilt.

    • kimmeister

      Yes, she always looks like “mildly surprised Jessica Alba” to me.

  • Sunraya

    She actually seems to have a brain. She does sound like an old soul. I like her.

  • snarkykitten

    She looks baffled by everything in these shots though

  • VioletFem

    Is there much overlap with the Cosmopolitan readership and Ariana Grande’s fans?

  • Jessica Freeman

    I am Squeeing with you Uncles!! Congrats on the mention!

    Ariana is meh to me. The fact that she’s over 20 and looks like she’s 12 is just too hard to get past.

  • SugarSnap108

    I have no idea who she is, so I guess I’m elderly, too. She just has that one “Aren’t I cute?” head tilt/facial expression, it seems. Meh. I think the “I stay home in my PJs, and am just as lame as you” thing is as calculated as any other young-celeb persona.

  • Jasmine Gonzalez

    She looks constantly terrified.

  • deathandthestrawberry

    She’s very junior Mariah Carey to me. When I mentioned those very words to my daughter, she said, “Who?” and I wanted to kill myself.

  • ConnieBV

    She’s going to grow up and be Nina Dobrev. I feel it.

  • NYCGlamourpuss

    Who the hell is this child, and what does it matter when COSMOPOLITAN MAGAZINE GAVE YOUR BOOK SOME LOVE!!! And that’s all that’s really important here.

  • GeoDiva

    I am so sick of Cosmo pushing the crop top cover photo. Don’t there stylist have anything else in their closets for these shoots?

  • Susan Velazquez

    Her facial expression just irritates me. I think it’s exactly what you said: she doesn’t have a strong opinion on anything like a product so her face always comes off to me as saying, “Won’t you like me? I’m so sweet and innocent and inoffensive so you should like me!”. If she’s a robot, may we call her the Ariana-bot? She’s programmed to be a 12 year old’s best friend forever!

  • stubbornthoughts


  • Adrianna Grężak

    Doesn’t sound like she’s an old soul, sounds like she’s an introvert. And as an introvert myself, I think there’s nothing wrong with that!

  • KT

    Whatever. Next!

  • unpious

    I would like for her to just once commit to a facial expression in a photo.

  •!/Space_Kitty Space Kitty

    This just confirms my aged, out of touchness – but that ‘ain’t I cute’ expression makes me so very tired.

  • Lesley

    i get a toothache just looking at her. she definitely poops glitter and rainbows..

  • sleah_in_norcal

    well isn’t she a sweet little thing, bless her heart…

  • Heather

    There’s a (creepy?) disconnect between the cover text (let’s get naked!) and the cover subject, who looks 12.

  • Jacob Bowen

    Ariana, I know pop music is all fun and makes you TONS of money, but could you PLEASE go back to Broadway (where you belong) and play “Nina” or “Vanessa” from “In the Heights”? You would be FANTASTIC, and it maybe help you lose some of the “Mariah” comparisons.

    AND CONGRATS TLO! I can’t WAIT to read your book!

  • Terri Smith

    I don’t know what an Ariana Grande is, but is it just me or does she look really uncomfortable in all of these pictures? I get that not everyone is going to be a model (Lord knows I’m not), but she just looks painfully awkward. I almost feel bad for her.

  • Michelle Wilson

    The constantly raised eyebrows and baby voice annoy me to no end, which is a shame because she has a beautiful singing voice. I just can’t deal with all the affectations.

  • NicholasGirling

    There’s something about her eyes that makes her look dead inside. The clothes are just whatever.

  • p_capet

    I just love her. She’s got such a great voice.

  • MzzPants

    Apparently, those are her default eyebrows. Turn on some music, dahling, and spend an hour or two practicing faces in the mirror.

  • demidaemon

    I hate that cover outfit. HAAAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE. It’s so Cosmo, which instantly makes it bad.

  • demidaemon

    BTW, is anyone wondering what the “one thing you must never do with a guy” is?

  • landon0204

    They may be going with the innocent thing, but big boobs she has not. Which adds to her 12 year old girl pedophile appeal. Any kind of lady lumps you ever see on her chest is all padding. And her voice? She can’t hit many lower notes, so you can’t listen to her songs on repeat otherwise you’ll get a headache. And her talking voice is octaves deeper than that high airy ditzy shit she coughs up and projects on tv.

  • shanteUstay

    Lol someone needs to up their “smize” game.

    Her face bears all the joy of a fish in shallow water…it’s not an inviting smile.