GTNYD: Stacy Keibler in Kaufmanfranco at the 2013 ACE Awards

Posted on November 05, 2013

Someone really needs to alert Cher that there’s been an inadvertent style retrospective of her life going on in the red carpet world lately. Suddenly, bold, slinky, and stomach-baring looks are all the rage. You’ve got to admit, if there’s anyone who deserves the much-overused “style icon” designation, it’s Cher.

Unfortunately, this one’s not quite working for us.


Stacy Keibler attends the 17th Annual Accessories Council ACE Awards at Cipriani 42nd Street in New York City in a Kaufmanfranco dress.

Kaufmanfranco Spring 2014 Collection

This may be a FMO (For Models Only) dress, because if a glamazon like Miss Stacy can’t make it work off the runway, then we doubt anyone can. There’s something weird going on with the waist here. And the white doesn’t really set her off all that well. And sure, she’s got a bod to beat the band (whatever that means), but that bodice isn’t really showing her assets off to their best effect.

Of course she’s gorgeous and we wouldn’t try to argue that she looks horrible here, but it looks amazing on the model and decidedly less so in the so-called “real world” of celebrity red carpet appearances. We think the slit of that skirt really needs to be pinned back, the way it is on the runway. But you’ve got to be in the mood for showing off serious skin if you go that route and apparently, Stacy hit her limit with the bathing suit-like top half. Bottom line: it’s just not coming together like it should. Girl, that’s not your dress.






[Photo Credit: Dimitrios Kambouris/Getty Images,]

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  • stellamaris73

    Is her hair skewing a bit Gumby or is it me?

    • alyce1213

      Can’t unsee.

    • sojourneryouth

      Me and Pokey say yes!

  • Sobaika

    She looks fine I guess, she just shouldn’t wear white and is too boobular for that cut.

    • Nicole C

      I agree, esp after looking at a model who looks STUNNING in white. Not meant to be, poor thing.

    • marlie

      Actually, with her permatan, I think the white looks nice on her. I’m in total agreement about her being too boobtastic, though.

      • 3boysful

        In that close-up, there’s underboob leaking out.

  • aeb1986

    Agreed. Stacey’s build is too athletic for this dress

    • bitchybitchybitchy

      I think you nailed the reason that this is not working.

  • eowyn_of_rohan

    Folded napkin skirt.

  • Mary Lauer

    Miss Keibler’s breasts are too big for that dress. Such a problem to have! 😎

    • CakesOnAPlane

      I think her breasts might not be speaking to each other.

    • StellaZafella

      Really apropos of the old term: “Double shoulder boulder holder”.

    • wisdomy

      Complete agreement. On Alex Wek, this is edgy. On Stacey Keibler (or pretty much any well-endowed woman), this is Adult Entertainment Awards.

  • Lesley

    she makes such poor hair choices but getting to the dress, her boobs are too big to be wearing something like that

  • Mismarker

    Well, hello, Tits McGee!

  • Eye contact during conversation must not be Stacy’s thing.

  • decormaven

    Such a nice smile and such a poor choice for the RC. But thanks for playing!

  • melanie0866

    Looks like her breasts are about to break free of those straps. I’m a little afraid they will. Dresses should not make viewers afraid.

    • MoHub

      You beat me to it! Just waiting for the inevitable wardrobe malfunction.

  • Lilithcat

    Any dress that requires the wearer to be careful how she moves in order to avoid revealing too much is nobody’s dress.

    • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

      That seems to be happening quite a lot lately, doesn’t it?

  • conniemd

    White and a lot of skin. I thought this was November?

  • eandh99

    Yeah, this should have been left to Alek Wek who really works it beautifully.

  • Jessica Freeman

    Not only is it not her dress, with the hair and make up, it’s all a little boring…

  • I think she pulled the front overlap of the skirt up a bit so she won’t trip. That skirt is a bit too long for her. “Hi, I’m Stacey, and these are my ladyfronts.”

  • marlie

    The dress is nice, but Stacy might be a little too buxom for this. And the waist of the dress is just annoyingly distracting. But her hair and makeup look nice. The darker hair color really suits her.

  • estella_nyc

    I think the girls aren’t quite hanging out at the same spot on Ms. Keibler’s chest. This dress calls for symmetrical body parts.

  • Lori

    I’m not sure this is FMO so much as it is for the less well-endowed only. There’s not enough bodice on this thing to deal with a lot of boobs. And of course the skirt needs to fit correctly, which Stacy’s does not.

  • In_Stitches

    Maybe Rooney Mara or Zoe Saldana might be able to pull it off.

    • TerryMH

      Agreed – Stacey’s chest is too big for this dress – Rooney or Zoe, both smaller chested women, could rock this, and maybe someone who is long-waisted.- I think Stacey is a bit short-waisted (she’s all legs) so that probably doesn’t help with this dress either, because the waist comes up so high.

    • Rooney Mara was my first thought too!

  • boweryboy

    It’s definitely a FMO dress that only looks good in motion.

  • MoHub

    Her boobs look as if they’re trying to escape.

  • Danielle

    It’s giving her a titscrepancy, something I thought Stacy would never be capable of.

  • With all that biz going on on top, there was no reason to have the sarong-held-on-by-a-belt detail on that skirt. It makes for visual extraneousness in an area where the boobs are ruling the roost.

  • webslice33

    too much skin, but she still looks good..

  • lobsterlen

    Not only FMO gown but a FMO, athletic built, small chested, woman of color gown. Honestly I think the gown would only work on that model. Kaufmanfranco should just give that model the gown and destroy all other copies.

  • hughman

    Now we know where the elves hide when they’re not making cookies.

    • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

      You win. 🙂

  • MW

    To me it doesn’t even work on the model, it gives her wide shoulders and no waist.

  • ChelseaNH

    I think strappy bodices tend to work better on women who are less bountifully endowed.

  • Tracy_Flick

    Wow, that skirt is incredibly apron-like. She always looks so happy and confident, I love that about her. But I agree that this dress just isn’t quite working.

  • filmcricket

    It’s so bottom-heavy. Nothing up top and then wedding party table-cloth on the bottom. I think it only works even on the runway because it’s in motion.

  • Jaeda Laurez

    I actually don’t think that’s not her dress, I think Girl That’s Not Your Hair With That Dress. Her form works, but the style gives her a bit of a pinhead- plus the bottom needs to be hemmed.

    • marlie

      Thank you. I thought it was me being too nit-picky, but she needs like a half inch hemmed off the bottom.

  • The skirt belongs to a different bodice. It probably looks better if she’s striding across the stage or the red carpet or whatever, like the model stalking down the runway. But it’s just too heavy for that bodice no matter how you look at it.

  • Clueless_Jock

    Umm.. why isn’t this working for you?

    • PastryGoddess


      Probably for all the reasons it’s working for you

  • VictoriaDiNardo

    My mother called me yesterday to alert me that CHER! would be on her favorite program – Dancing With The Stars! and to be sure to watch. ( disclaimer: I only watch this with/for my mom! ) It was a Cher retrospective happening: she sang, she judged, she got bleeped! Giant feather headgear and lots of beads – even for that venue – and she was just so cool and so kind, and it seemed, sincerely flattered by all the tributes. It was a Cher love-fest!

    I think it really is kind of a Cher moment. When someone danced to “If I Could Turn Back Time” they asked her what she would turn back time to, if she could. Without blinking she answered “to the Eighties – I had so much fun!” and I think that’s what she represents to people right now. Fun and resilience, such a good blend. Love huh.

    • Lori

      She was also on The Voice in the last week or so. I don’t watch it, but my friend who does said that she was really fine and a good judge.

      • demidaemon

        Yes, she was Blake Shelton’s guest mentor (WTF! But he asked her, so I guess that’s all you have to do), and she probably gave some of the best vocal coaching I have ever seen on that show. Plus she was Cher, which meant outfit and wig changes up the wazoo. It was awesome.

    • Rand Ortega

      She was on Graham Norton over the weekend. In this tartan schoolgirl skirt she rocked like no 1’s business. Such a goddess!

      • VictoriaDiNardo

        I am definitely not watching enough tv – sorry I missed that!

        • Rand Ortega

          Sang her new song. Live. Killed it!

          • VictoriaDiNardo

            Same last night – PLUS – black coq feather full headdress, a bit of a nod to the Mackie Oscar outfit. Big production numbers with dancers all around her…just the right amount of cheese. And everyone looked like they were having a blast!

          • Rand Ortega

            MUST. FIND. ON. YOUTUBE.

          • demidaemon

            I love that song. I hope we get an awesome LSFYL moment with this song on this season of RPDR.

  • YousmelllikeAnnaWintour

    The 17th Annual Accessories Council ACE Awards? Really?

  • Jessica Goldstein

    It looks fabulous on the model because the model has ebony skin, legs that go on for a mile, and no need to decide on a hair style. The model is quite likely Southern Sudanese in origin—I’d bet Dinka—with a figure that is curvy enough to fill out the dress and still long enough to look sleek in anything. I’m struggling to picture any other human being this dress would work on!

  • cakecakecake

    Someone tell me why she’s at an award ceremony of any kind? I mean, really

  • Jacqueline Wessel

    Between Stacy, Kate Hudson and Jamie Whatshername I have seen way too much. And if I have to see too much at least let it be Cher.

  • penguinmom

    Am I the only one who sees Mickey Mouse ears under that halter? I agree that her build is not right for that dress. It’s not just the rack, but also stunning musculature of her well-toned midriff that throws the whole look off and leaves me thinking “hidden Mickey.”

  • lunchcoma

    I don’t know if it’s FMO, but I think to pull it off a celebrity would need both a small bust and the willingness to style it without emphasizing the sex. Realistically speaking, I think most women who’d fit that description wouldn’t pick this dressin the first place – it’s most tempting to the woman who shouldn’t be wearing it.

  • Fordzo

    Awww…give the poor girl a break. She just broke up with Clooney, which means she hasn’t had sex in over 2 years.

    • marlie

      That was months ago. She’s had time to move on. Plus, it’s not like he was the love of her life (I’m assuming); she had to know what she was getting into when she started seeing him.

      • Fordzo

        But I’ll bet you a quarter that her contract stipulates that she cannot start publicly dating for 6 months post-breakup. She’s still got 2 months to go.

        • PastryGoddess

          she’s been dating someone for months now.

          • Fordzo

            Gah! You’re ruining my conspiracy theories!

  • MilaXX

    Looks like a wedding dress for a stripper

    • Fordzo

      No. It’s too long. Any stripper worth her g-string would want to show off her shoes.

  • Winter_White

    Re the Cher style retrospective: hmm, which ladystar is going to bring the iconic Half-Breed look? (Drugged-out pony optional.) Because whoever goes there will be in for a world of controversy…oh, wait, I think I just answered my own question…

    BTW, that Half-Breed ‘music video’ is on YouTube. No words.

  • tallgirl1204

    This might be Kate Hudson’s dress. Made for someone with a smaller bust.

  • CC06

    Crikey, that dress looks smashing on the model.

    • gigi kennedy

      seriously! absolute stunner on the model.

  • keldy

    Two words: Boob Slings

  • prettybigkitty

    Her boob implants make the top half look weird. The model, who has a relatively flat chest, totally rocks it.

    • MaggieMae

      Yes, plus skin color. It’s stunning on the dark skinned model!

  • judybrowni

    Miss, the Porn Star Awards are in the other banquet hall.

  • formerlyAnon

    Top half: You can take the girl out of wrestling, but apparently not even several years’ application of Clooney can take the wrestling out of the girl.

  • DinaSews

    The model is stunning.

  • PastryGoddess

    Whereas Lupita Opongo would have rocked the shit out of this dress…

    • pookiesmom

      Great minds…

  • Tatiana Luján

    She seems too busty for such narrow straps. Maybe if the stipes that make the bustier were wider this would look easier, classier, effortless.

  • Rand Ortega

    Boobtastic. Boobtacular. Boobarific. The word’s lost all meaning.
    I do pity the straight men who tried to hold a conversation with her. Must’ve been a herculean effort.

  • Candigirl1968

    If you aren’t an A, B minus, you really need to leave this kind of top alone alone unless you’re looking for a sugar daddy. Or Cher.

  • Trickytrisha

    The dress is rather offensive on her, but what really bothers me is her perpetual skinned back hairstyles. Not flattering at all.

  • SugarSnap108

    Interesting choice for November in New York. I can’t tell if the dress is as poorly constructed as it seems, or if it’s just that the fit is off.

  • kipper

    I AM SINGLE!! I AM SINGLE !! I AM SINGLE !! ( but damn it looks good on teh model )

  • Sunraya

    Cher was very skinny and had no breasts, so she could wear just about anything. Stacy is a woman with a little more chest, so this looks tacky on her.

  • Aurumgirl

    Just because you can is often no reason you should.

  • OrigamiRose

    Not to mention, last evening it was “Cher Night” on Dancing with the Stars.

    /heard it from a friend, of course.

  • Janet B

    How can that dress be too long for her?

  • that is one perky pair of boobies, purchased or not. but the oddness at the waistline is distracting, and since it looks the same one the runway, it must be intentional. why? there is almost a sporty look to this, with the clean ponytail, that is like. but a plain white gown is only one step less boring than a plain black gown.

  • NYCGlamourpuss

    Oh nooooo. Nooo no no no nooooo… girl, that dress, while slinky, is not doing your tits any favors.

  • pookiesmom


  • MissusBee

    The blinding white plus awkward stiffness of fabric reads surgical to me. Like her body is so insane, it needs its own straightjacket, which seems pretty valid actually. INSANE BOD! READING YOU LOUD AND CLEAR STACY!

    • Targettaste

      I think any time a lot of straps are done in white it looks like bandages or mummy.

  • bellafigura1

    I mean, it can’t be that she believes being able to count her ribs is sexy. The slices that are offered up here are just not attractive no matter how taut and toned. It’s just not working. Not to mention, something yawn-worthy about her.

  • unbornfawn

    The dress needs the slit, this is not the time to be modest and Stacy’s version needs to be hemmed a little higher. And that weird pin-head thing she’s got going on with her hair is just awful.

  • MarieLaura

    The reason this dress doesn’t work for her is because the boobs are fake and the dress does nothing but accentuate her sternum in between them. Large or small, you need the real deal for this dress.

  • nannypoo

    This is just bad all around. George got out not a moment too soon.

  • EveEve

    Bathing suit on top, too-stiff sarong on the bottom.

  • That dress only belongs to the model. And I don’t just say that because I am not a fan of Stacey. I say it because I am not a fan of Stacey AND it’s not her dress.

  • GTrain

    The model looks amazing in it. I don’t think it works for fake boobs you can drive a truck between.

  • Ann VerWiebe

    It looks like she has a Kleenex tucked into her waistband…

  • OldPandaDayz

    It’s smushing the boobies! Also, it’s sorta making her look like she has back fat (I’m guessing because it was designed to fit a bit tighter to prevent a wardrobe malfunction up front), but still….

  • dorothea_brooke

    My husband would say “I think she looks nice” and I’d try to explain all the ways in which she doesn’t look “nice”and he’d say, “oh yes, I see” but he’d be humoring me. This is for the straight guys.

  • demidaemon

    She is not showing off her best feature here–her legs–which immediately should have told her and her stylist that this is not her dress.

  • thupid.

  • Pterodactyl111

    You know, I think it would work a lot better on a less busty woman.

  • quiltrx

    I can’t stand this super-tight, slick hair she’s defaulting to lately. It makes her look brittle and tough (like an overcooked chicken, not like Michonne).
    And I can’t deal with her orange ‘boobs’ (that look about as real as Nic Cage’s ‘hair’ in most movies) in an argument and squished at the same time.

  • Jacob Bowen

    Of ALL PEOPLE Stacy should be showing her legs with the pinned back hem! She definitely should NOT wear this dress though.

  • penguinmom

    Looks like a Hidden Mickey hiding under her halter top. Those are definitely Micky ears.

  • Sweetvegan

    The skirt is a completely different fabric from the skirt on the model. The fabric in the model’s skirt is a fluid jersey. Stacy’s skirt is a heavy satin, with a weird fold in it. And the skirt is a little too long for her.

  • BeeBeauNYC

    It’s certainly not going to be called bridal.

  • lrhoff

    What is with her hair? Did she just not wash it and decide to slick it back? She’s not lookin’ great here, that’s for sure.

  • ItAin’tMe

    The hair adds to the “just got out of the pool” look.

  • Gatto Nero

    Really tasteless; and the skirt looks like a pita rollup that’s falling apart.

  • Sonja Brisson

    Uh, no. Oh, for some elegance. Oh for some tailors who hem. Oh for cast off women who should do whatever they can do to look chic and not trying-too-hard/don’t you miss this? after they’ve been set aside. She’s beautiful and needs a stylist. Immediately.

  • Not applicable

    damn. hope girl doesn’t sneeze.