Tyson Beckford in New York City

Posted on September 13, 2013

Our asses this fine morning, kittens; they are dragging. New York Fashion Week chewed us up and spit us out.

Fortunately, needy attention whore Tyson Beckford is here to help us ease into the day.


Tyson Beckford showing off his muscles in New York City.

We adore every single person in the background for strenuously ignoring his obvious look-at-me-ism. True New Yorkers, every one of you.






    • Kate Andrews

      Not feeling it.

      • e jerry powell

        So few people are these days.

    • gsk241

      I don’t care who you are or what you look like, it’s just tacky to walk around town shirtless. Really. He would look so much better with a t-shirt covering up the waistband of his underpants.

      • RebeccaKW

        I agree. Though, it’s one thing to be out exercising without a shirt-jogging, riding your bike, and stopping for a drink or something. And another thing to just be wandering around. He’s wearing Jordans, a backpack, and carrying a glass bottle. Clearly, no exercising happening.

        • e jerry powell

          He certainly doesn’t seem to have a Crunch sweat on. Even with that, he’d have had to shower after the workout, so there would have been time to PUT SOME DAMN CLOTHES ON.

      • NYCGlamourpuss

        I have to say – we’ve got this gorgeous perfect man in front of us, shirtless, and all we can collectively think is “tacky”. It just goes to show, no matter how buff and perfect you are, put on some damn clothes before you stroll the streets of my city, or we WILL judge you!

      • JulieTy

        Maybe I’m becoming a crotchety old woman, but I think shirtlessness should be reserved for the beach. Period. Yesterday I saw a guy running shirtless in Central Park and he was gorilla-hairy. Gross. Even the rare beautifully fit men who go shirtless in the city are tacky, IMHO.
        If they can show their nipples in public, why can’t we (women)?

        • alyce1213

          We can, it’s legal. Which is not to say we should.

        • e jerry powell

          It’s legal in Austin, too, but we never have bare-breasted women parading down Sixth Street except at Mardi Gras. More likely, if there’s a bare-breasted woman anywhere in town, it’s because there’s a baby attached to her nipple while she’s standing the checkout line at Whole Foods.

      • GorgeousThings

        Totally agree!
        But I wouldn’t kick him outta bed for eating crackers.

        • e jerry powell

          Too many carbs in crackers.

      • lilyvonschtupp

        It’s Tyson, honey. If he was in my house a shirt would be out of the question.

    • Julie Chase

      The sticker in between his calves in the third picture is making the same face as me. But my eyes are rolling harder.

      • DinahR

        That little sticker betwixt his legs is the best photo bomb ever.

        • NYCGlamourpuss

          It really is.

        • algaechick

          Seriously. I thought it was at first placed there as a ‘black bar’, covering something obscene. And then I thought “dayum, and those shorts are long”. And then I realized no matter how oversized his muscles may be, surely muscle couldn’t be hanging out of his shorts.

        • decormaven

          Props to the pap who got that shot. Doubt he noticed it at first, but that was genius.

    • http://foodycat.blogspot.co.uk/ foodycatAlicia

      Claire, you wanna see a picture of a guy with elephantiasis of the nuts?

      • SugarSnap108

        Excellent use of the present imagery and the 1980s.

      • Sartorial_She

        I heart you, foodycat!

    • sojourneryouth

      Noooooooo. Makes me feel uncomfortable, like when women shop at Wal-Mart in bikinis. Not sexy.

    • NYCGlamourpuss

      Is that an iPhone in his pocket, or is his gigantic rectangular shaped penis just happy to see me?

    • Jessica Freeman

      Attention whore away, Tyson. If I were in the background you would see me reaching for DAT ASS.

    • nannypoo

      Alexandria’s dropped crotch pants seem to have found their customer.

    • algaechick

      My problems with this Sausage Friday post:
      1. He’s wearing a backpack, but has tons of shit stuff in his pockets.
      2. The idea of sweaty backpack straps is grossing me out.
      3. Ultimately, nothing. if this attention whore wants me to stare at his finely chiseled body, I’ll oblige. I would, however, out of principle, also studiously ignore him (while making surreptitious glances) if I were to see such a spectacle on the streets.

      • Kimbolina

        Ugh, the thought of wearing a backpack without a shirt just grosses me out. Especially in the summer. Ickkk.

        • Heather

          I hope he used Body Glide. Think of the chafing!

    • Monday1900

      Attention whore he may be but look up “sex on legs” in Websters and you’ll get one of these pics.

    • Silly Grrl

      Lord jesus.

    • Glam Dixie

      My eyes, they have rolled into the back of my head they rolled so hard. Whatever dude, you’re not all that.

    • lobsterlen

      Is he super-human or is he stuffing his shorts with entire roll of paper towels?

    • YoungSally

      See? Alexandra’s poopy pants silhouette is being embraced by none other than Tyson…. ; p

    • Nicola Anna Molly Page

      I feel like he’s looking at the camera like, ‘I could just oopsy daisy by accident pour this water over my torso. You want me to, don’t you?’

      No Tyson. Just no.

      Or am I reading way too much into this sad case attentionwhoretiatis?

      • Monzerrat Ontiveros

        and what about that bottle! Is it glass?

    • ShaoLinKitten

      If I looked like that, I would never wear a shirt. However, it seems something is in his shorts and it’s fighting to get out. LET IT OUT, TYSON. I dare the NYers in the background to ignore that.

    • KayEmWhy

      No class.

    • Heather

      Agree w/above. Yes, Tyson, you’re purdy. But I hate those kind of shorts (slipperiness of fabric grosses me out, plus they trap odors), and your sneakers look like something a 14-year-old boy would covet. That’s… not a compliment.

    • MartyBellerMask

      Y’all can call him tacky, but Tyson has his game on for Sausage Friday. Good for him.

    • clairellis

      He is a total douche but damn, he’s fine a fuck.

    • Anna Vasquez

      True New Yorkers? Maybe the chick in the sandals. The couple seems to be looking at directions while wearing sneakers. I’m feeling tourist.

      However, I respect their stoicism and seeming nonchalance. Carry on.

      • alyce1213

        The gal looking at the piece of paper is a tourist, judging by her jeans and sneakers.

    • Angela Langdale

      Who ordered the side of beef-cake this a.m.? Rowr! Or as my daughters like to say, “Look at those muscles rollin’ by!”

    • marlie

      He’s certainly pretty, but he doesn’t get my motor running. And I’d actually be more likely to swoon if he were wearing a perfectly fitted suit.

      • Akmall Razlan

        could not agree more, not on the motor running, *lol*, but the wearing fitted suit, btw, is NY is too hot? Its not Spring yet right?

    • crash1212

      I am intrigued by the couple behind him in pictures two and three…what are they looking at? Also, how can one do anything sporty, let alone walk, in those drop-crotch unflattering shorts? Alexandria must be in the house.

    • Sara Brams-Miller

      He bugs me.

    • alyce1213

      What is going on in his pants?

      • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

        I volunteer to find out.

        • decormaven

          So selfless!

    • butterflysunita

      Hmmmm. My guess is Calvin Klein paid him to walk around half-naked with his underwear showing, knowing it would get his photo taken.

    • BitterOldQueen

      Attentionwhoreism aside, why is this man orange? For that matter, why do other New Yorkers appear also to be orange? Is there an orange problem in NYC? Or did the photographer perhaps get a bit carried away with the saturation function in Photoshop? I’m so distracted by the orange problem I simply can’t judge this ridiculous attention-grab. I must get to the swooning couch.

    • JP

      I love how they’re ignoring him and he’s got this look on his face like “are they looking at me?”

    • RussellH88

      I keep thinking how uncomfortable those straps would feel against bare skin.

    • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

      Whore it up, pretty boy. You’ll get no complaints from me.

      • random_poster

        You got that right, sister. It’s out and about, and serving it up on a platter.

      • Kate

        I’ll take two! One for each arm.

    • Samuel Joesph Donovan

      Honestly, the one thing I can’t tear my eyes away from in this photo is the 16 inch crotch seam.

      F*ck the what?

      • Akmall Razlan

        wow there, care to check it by yourself? or do you need me to check it for you? ha..

    • SugarSnap108

      Is there an NYC ordinance against him wearing a shirt? Should there be?

    • CatherineRhodes

      Welcome to this edition of sausage Friday.

    • http://heartprintandstyle.com/ Vivi N

      “Tyson Beckford showing off his muscles in New York City.”

      Just a simple yet funny caption.

    • Clueless_Jock

      He looks good for a guy in his early 40s.

    • http://ayearofmommyhood.blogspot.com/ Tabby_abby

      That is one way to start Sausage Friday. So yummy.

    • OffToSeeHim

      He looks like that guy with the 132 pound ball, amirite? WTH???

    • Akmall Razlan

      Its just me or his had face lifting or something? Its looking so pulled up and its weird. Sorry Tyson, but hey, you really have nice body and walking around shirtless is not doing any good. there are more people having sick body and yet, they have Instagram. Care to know more about Instagram Mr Tyson?

    • conniemd

      Honestly, he could achieve the same level of hotness if he put on T with the arms cut out, or even a wife-beater *ugh. But he’s a man who would wear a tank without looking like a low-life. Going shirtless makes him low life.

    • MilaXX

      In some shots his pants look like Alexandria made them.

      • demidaemon

        I had a similar thought.

    • ana170

      Some time ago I was in a gas station when an obese, heavily sweating, middle-aged guy walked in wearing no shirt despite the “No shirt, No Shoes, No Service” law. That’s the definition of gross and tacky. This is just slightly irritating. There’s a big difference.

    • Jacqueline Wessel

      Now we’re talking…though I wish he’d empty his pockets and take off the backpack…In fact, just take off the shorts too, Tyson. (Personally, the best part is his smiling face.)

    • http://twitter.com/#!/Space_Kitty Space Kitty


    • formerlyAnon

      I imagine that coffee & assorted carbs, with naps, pasta and wine later might be the medication needed for Fashion Week Lag.

      Thanks for stalwartly launching another Sausage Friday despite your joint lack of energy.

    • Shawn EH

      Thanks, Tyson, never change doll!

    • e jerry powell

      Was Tyson Beckford in those photos? All I saw was tits and ass.

    • Just Me

      Tacky, silly and unnecessary. But, at least, he is not walking with his kid, nanny and dog. Credit where credit is due. It’s all I got.

    • XPT

      I’ll say something crazy: he doesn’t even have the body to do this shit anymore!

    • Laurie Landry

      Those shorts are frugly.

      • altissima

        Agreed. Tyson should remove them immediately.

    • Trickytrisha

      Well, I’m happy to indulge his look-at-me-ism.

    • quiltrx

      I finally have the reason to ask…”Tyson, what exactly is going on in your pants?”

    • lilyvonschtupp

      Awwww sucki, now. Hello 1996!:0D

    • bellafigura1

      I’m so torn. On the one hand, NO. On the other … yeow.

    • Contralto

      Why? WHY did he ruin that otherwise flawless body with those repulsive tattoos?!

    • MannahattaMamma

      Didn’t he earn a lot of money modeling or something? You’d think he’d have made enough to buy a shirt.

    • andreawey

      I love the crazy smiley face between his knees in picture 3 :D

    • yethica

      Ugh. He’s such a douche.