Project Runway: Heidi’s L’il Sweatshop

Posted on September 06, 2013

We’re heading out the door to go watch a whole bunch of Project Runway decoy collections walk a runway at Fashion Week, darlings. We’ll have to keep this one brief.

 

Product Runway.

 

a.k.a.: The episode that proved once and for all that Heidi has ZERO taste.

All this hilarious talk about concepts, for clothes that look like what most ladies wear to run out and grab some tampons at the drug store at 7 am.

 

Helen

Congrats, Afterschool Special. You’re a weepy shit-stirrer who runs to teacher at the first sign of blowback, but fortunately for you, Nina Garcia apparently REALLY needs something to cover her ass on a treadmill.

We joke. It’s actually a well-deserved win.

 

Karen

The Duchess was on fire last night and we dearly missed him (as Nina clearly did), but he took it a step too far with the “fat girl” line. He’s out of practice. He forgot how to be bitchy without being a bitch.

Anyway, this is awful. Auf Wiedersehen, Drew Barryless.

 

 

Alexander

Thank God Nina jumped in on Heidi’s praising and pointed out how unflattering that color-blocking is. But aside from that, this is a good entry from Drag Brows.

 

 

Kate

 Cute, but maybe a bit overpraised. Heidi’s critique about not wanting a zipper bouncing against her back was the one smart thing she said all night.

 

Alexandria

 The jacket was fine, but she deserved every bit of mean-girl bitching the Duchess could sling for those ridiculous pants. We’ve never loved the dropped crotch, but we can see it working for certain types of outfits. To put a drop crotch on a pair of workout pants reveals instincts so bad that we’re questioning whether she belongs in the competition.

Also, she’s sour and we’re kind of over her.

 

 

Ken

GO HOME, COCO MONTRESE, you low-class thing. Afterschool Special loves to push his buttons and then cry about how mean he is, so we’re not exactly taking her side here. But he was completely off the chain. One potentially violent contestant per season, please, producers.

This wasn’t great, but it actually does look like what some women wear to gym. You couldn’t say that about a lot of the other entries.

 

Bradon

Insanely cute. Why this got waved through without comment, we don’t know. We can understand it not winning due to manufacturing cost concerns, but it’s easily the best-designed look in the bunch.

 

 

Jeremy

Stealth-bitch said that women don’t all want to wear black pants to the gym, when experience tells us that the exact opposite appears to be true. One thing’s for sure: very few women, in our experience, want to wear bright purple pants at the gym in their stead.

 

 

Justin

Easily the cutest, most wearable thing he’s done on the show, which really isn’t saying much.

 

 

Dom

 All those red lines are crazy unflattering. Although we did feel for her when she said constantly being in the middle means she never knows what the judges think of her work.

 

 

[Photo Credit: Barbara Nitke for Lifetime]

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