New York Fashion Week Spring 2014 Front Row: Day 5

Posted on September 11, 2013

Hit it, bitches! It’s our last full day here and before we head out for some MAJOR FASHIONATIN’ we thought we’d take a moment to tell total strangers what they’re getting wrong. There’s really no better way to start the day.


Carolina Herrera Spring 2014 Show
Christina Hendricks

The color blocking on that blouse looks unfortunate. Can’t really judge the lower half. Hair looks great, though.

Christiana Ricci

Oy. Couldabin a cute dress, but the sleeves and neckline take it straight to Rose Nylund-ville. Or St. Olaf, as the case may be.

Daisy Fuentes

Serving Fabulous Fashion Bitch.

Dita Von Teese

Girl, That’s Not Your Look.

Michelle Dockery


Molly Sims, Nina Garcia

 Pretty. Nina clearly approves.



Donan Karan Spring 2014 Show
Tinsley Mortimer

Also pretty, but a belt would’ve been nice.

Goldie Hawn, Marisa Berenson

While walking down the sidewalk outside after the show, we heard a VERY familiar voice behind us say “I’m leaving the Donna Karan show now…” and turned around to find ourself face to (sunglass-and-hair-covered) face with Miss Goldie herself, who’s just so very Goldie in every way that it’s a little surreal. Certain celebrities are like monuments and when you encounter them like that, it’s like unexpectedly stumbling across the Eiffel Tower or The Statue of Liberty. You’re a little discombobulated.

Also: we don’t believe there was anyone on the other end of that phone she was talking into. Just an impression. How else are you going to keep the hundreds of people milling about from bothering you?

Marisa will always be referred to by us as “Der plegma. Dat comes in der tubes.” Look it up, youngsters.



Kaufmanfranco Spring 2014 Show
Ashley Greene

Jane Krakowski

Katie Cassidy

 Serving up dominatrix realness, all three.


Pamella Roland Spring 2014 Show
Katie Cassidy, Perrey Reeves


Okay, having seen her all week, we’re calling it: Katie wears too much makeup. It doesn’t look right in pictures or in person. Time to have a talk with your people, girl.

Otherwise, they both look great.



Reem Acra Spring 2014 Show
Kerry Rhodes, Hofit Golan

We canNOT with that bod.

Apparently there’s a girl somewhere in this picture. Let us know if you find her.

Tinsley Mortimer

A little on the juvenile side.

Anthony Kiedis, Helena Vestergaard


Boy, that is NOT YOUR HAIR.


[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

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  • pattyw

    Was waiting for “a little on the juvenile side” caption for Anthony Kiedis’ girlfriend.

    • Jessica Freeman

      also…sex hair…

      • RebeccaKW

        Goes with his porn ‘stache.

    • cowper

      They look a bit like bobbleheads in that photo.

    • Orange Girl

      Not to be gross, but don’t they kind of look alike?

      • BerriG

        I was really hoping that was his daughter and not his girlfriend.

      • lamamu

        Okay, glad I’m not the only one who sees it. It appears Anthony Kiedis is channeling his inner Mick Jagger and has found his Bianca.

    • 3boysful

      I immediately thought “Sonny and Cher!”

  • Dorothy & Michael n/a

    I hope those are rings and not barnacles all over Marisa Berenson’s fingers.

    • Guest

      It’s hard to tell. Time has not been kind.

    • Targettaste

      Poor thing broke her fingers and had to wear splints?

  • My life is over. Dita Von Teese FAILED me. *sighs heavily into cold dregs of coffee cup*

    • MoHub

      I was shocked, I tells ya. SHOCKED!

    • MarissaLG

      I don’t usually like to speculate on these types of things, but she is looking very curvy in this picture (not in a bad way at all) and her choice of outfit seems very out of character. Do we think maybe Miss Dita could be expecting?

      • RussellH88

        I can only imagine Dita Von Teese giving birth to a drag queen. No normal mortal will emerge from that woman’s porcelain loins.

    • PeggyOC

      I know. It’s like Swinton showing up in sweatpants. Where are the heroes?

      • MissKimP

        “Where are the heroes?” HA! Love it!

    • ballerinawithagun

      I know! What is going on with that black band down the front of 2 curvy women??? Lift and separate?

      • Aurumgirl

        It’s sad, but it’s the outfit that kills them both. I mean, they both chose to wear the same outfit–Christina’s in a plain white and black, and Dita’s in a black with print material. The outfit is clearly at fault. Both ought to send black roses to her stylist and to the designer.

    • Leah Elzinga

      and at FASHION WEEK!!! It’s not like this was some lame promo thing! This is FASHION WEEK.

    • decormaven

      The axis of the earth has been altered. Say it ain’t so!

    • Katie Wolf

      She & Hendricks are wearing the same outfits, aren’t they; blouses & pants? They must have thought they knew something we didn’t. I don’t know how to feel – I don’t love the looks, but I’m glad they had each other?

    • ConnieBV

      Yeah, you can’t give people years of Ava Gardner and then try to slyly Cathy Hepburn them.That dog won’t hunt, missy.

    • Aurumgirl

      Not her fault. At least that’s how I’m going to handle it.

  • charlotte

    Lady Mary wins. Otherwise I’m terrified by what some people seem to call fashion.

    • Rhonda Shore

      I’m kinda liking Ashley Greene – she really pulls off leather!

      • charlotte

        True, the way she poses on the runway looks like she belongs there.

      • Spicytomato1

        Agree. I think this might be the best she’s ever looked, imo.

  • MoHub

    Who’da thunk Dita could be so disappointing?

    • Eric Stott

      It’s a nice color on her, but otherwise, ehhhh

    • I question everything I have ever known.

  • Eric Stott

    Goldie Hawn looks sweet until I get to the feet- I can not go with silly putty peep toe pumps AND black nail polish. Still, hugs and kisses sweetie.

    • MoHub

      Goldie also needs to either wear hose or leg makeup. I have those same visible blue veins on my legs, and they ain’t a fashion statement.

      • Eric Stott

        True, but she’s a beloved institution. Think of it – how many cast members of Laugh-In are still living, let alone visible in public?

        • altalinda

          I saw 2 of them at a Las Vegas gaming convention a few years back (Joanne W. and Ruth B., I think). Time had not been kind.

      • RebeccaKW

        I disagree. Certainly, if you want to wear hose, by all means. But I don’t think having visible veins (or any other issue-super pale legs, scars, crepey skin) needs to be covered up. I think she’s got great legs and I encourage her (and everyone else) to work it.

        • MasterandServant

          I, myself, have incredibly pale legs (looks ok on the face, on the legs not so attractive). It makes every vein (or spider vein, as the case may be) VERY visible. In the summer I usually put a liquid bronzer on my legs over regular lotion, and that helps. I then run to nice opaque stocking ASAP when the weather turns. It felt so strange this morning reaching for the bronzer again as it is hot as all get out in NYC today….

        • marlie

          Yep. However one shows/doesn’t show their legs should be in whatever way makes them comfortable. And, I think Goldie looks slammin’.

        • formerlyAnon

          It makes NO sense to me that some will pay tens of thousands of dollars for facial “work,” expensive hair coloring and augmentation and all the other things they may hoist, laser, tint, plump or condition, and then display one’s bare and aging legs. But that’s just me, and I will camouflage my spider & larger veins and the discolorations of aging which are all very visible on my pale legs leaving others to do as they will.

          • martha

            Her legs seemed more pale than her face and arms

  • I hate musicals. Cabaret is one of my favourite movies. I can’t even keep track of my own inconsistency. Goldie Hawn and Marisa Berenson make strange seatmates.

    • charlotte

      Same here regarding muscials and Cabaret.

    • MilaXX

      Did I read here that Alan Cumming is going to be in a revival of Caberet? If so I seriously need to find a way to see that.

      • Someone downvoted me because I hate musicals? Good lord.

        Alan Cumming would make the most glorious MC!

        • MilaXX

          I just ignore the downvotes.

        • Fanny_Trollope

          I just upvoted you to make you feel better, Alicia.

        • Daxx2513

          I thought he already did that years ago. Was great if memory serves.

  • HM3

    What is that strange, sparkly growth coming out of Kerry Rhodes’ left hip?

    • Alloy Jane

      He’s just happy to see you 😉

  • I’m sorry, Kerry Rhodes is it? We have not been properly introduced. It is so, so nice to meet you.

    Also, I’m so glad you mentioned Katie Cassidy and her spray paint gun of terror. There are houses who have less coverage.

  • Tamara Hogan

    So many blondes, so many horrific roots.

    • Leah Elzinga

      and you know they each paid $400+ to get those roots “just so”, too.

      • MilaXX

        Try the $800 – 1500 celebrity hair stylist like Ted Gibson charge.

        • Leah Elzinga

          ugh, just thinking of spending $1500 on something only meant to last three weeks (because you KNOW there isn’t a celeb out there thinking “Maybe if I just part it on THIS side I can get another 4 weeks out of it??”) makes me ill.

          • MilaXX

            True, but celeb do indeed pay for $200 eyebrow waxes & $1500 hair cuts

    • That’s the ombre fashion for ya

  • RussellH88

    When I initially saw Katie Cassidy, I thought someone had given Rose Byrne a drag queen makeover.

    • charlotte

      I seriously thought she was Rose Byrne.

  • altalinda

    Despite the color-blocking mistake, Christina H. looks a lot better than usual. Maybe she should go for pants more often.

    • MoHub

      Agreed. A modified scoop neck would also have done her more good than that collar.

    • MilaXX

      I thought the color blocking was just part of what was wrong with that. The competing blacks made my eyes twitch worse than competing shades of white could ever do.

  • MarissaLG

    Thanks to Anthony Kedis, it’s now time to play the fun, all-American game: Girlfriend…OR…Daughter!!!

    (I think the clear answer is Girlfriend but come on, man.)

    • vahtel

      Same. I initially thought “daughter” but then I read her name and was like, “or maybe not.” Why can’t the rock gods of my youth have a little more taste? Ugh.

  • meowing

    Anthony Kiedis, Helena Vestergaard: I have no idea who they are, but looks like modern day Sonny and Cher. Haven’t read the comments yet to see if the other BKs agree already.

    • MoHub

      Sonny Bono is spinning in his grave.

    • MilaXX

      You seriously never heard of The Red Hot Chili Peppers? Da-yum, I feel old now.

      • meowing

        Have heard of ’em, but didn’t know the individuals names. Not that I’ll look ’em up, though.

        And, MoHub, the early days of Sonny were satorially baaaaad. 🙂

  • whirligig7

    “Apparently there’s a girl somewhere in this picture. Let us know if you find her.” — I don’t get it?

    • pop_top

      They’re (well me too) focused too much on Kerry to notice the chick next to him, lol.

      • par3182

        “Hofit Golan” – that’s not a name, that’s just some distracted typing.

        • LuisaNL

          I think it may be an anagram and you’re supposed to find the real name?

          • par3182

            Floating Ho.

        • Darva Sutra

          I choose to read her name as Hobbit Golem.

  • boweryboy

    Der plegma! How I miss TLo’s Musical Mondays.

    • Sarah Lang

      “On my fader’s library sofa!!”

  • Spicytomato1

    Katie Cassidy sure gets around. Agree about the makeup but I love what she’s been wearing. She also makes me wonder about the protocol of these things. Can you wear the same thing all day or do you need to change for every show? And if that’s the case, where/when/how do you manage that?

    • random_poster

      I was wondering the exact same thing!

    • marlie

      I get the impression that they change for every show. When/where they do that totally escapes me.

      • Leah Elzinga

        in the car, I’m guessing.

        • marlie

          “Stars: They’re just like us.”

          (I used to have to change my clothes in the car on the daily because of back-to-back after-school activities.)

          • Leah Elzinga

            though I’m gonna guess that it’s easier to get changed in the back of a cushy luxury SUV than in the back of a 1996 Neon.

          • marlie

            It was a Sundance, but you’re right. 😉

      • Spicytomato1

        Maybe they get to go backstage with the models if they are wearing something of the featured designer? Between that and the crowds it seems exhausting. And with that I’ve confirmed it…I am officially old.

    • Sarah Winningham

      If you are a celebrity invited to sit in the front row most likely the designer will send you an outfit, that’s why they invited you (that’s why Christina Hendricks and Dita Von Teese are wearing very similar ugly blouses, Carolina Herrera asked them to), so yes, you have to change for each one.

      • marlie

        In Christina and Dita’s cases, I’m surprised that Herrera’s people had two high-profile ladystars in essentially the same outfit. Poor planning on someone’s part.

        • MilaXX

          Two busty ladystars in similar outfits. Someone should have realized that color blocked button down tops would make them look like they were smuggling canalopes into the tents.

          • formerlyAnon

            Glad I’m not the only one silently judging harshly the choice of celebrity on which to showcase those blouses. It’s like some kind of designer minion blind spot.

          • demidaemon

            I know. And Carolina had a great interview about the purpose of getting clothes on celebrities’ backs and how they reflects on the designer. If they look awesome, that’s awesome for me. If they look bad, I look terrible. So this is a huge faux pas considering it is at her own show.

  • ashtangajunkie

    GOLDIE. J’adore so very much. Ashley Greene is so gorgeous that she’s almost difficult to look at.

  • LaSylphide

    Are Dita and Christina wearing the same outfit in different colors? Goldie and Marisa: icons, and don’t they know it? As for most of the rest: who the heck are they?

    • SewingSiren

      Good catch about Christina and Dita. I think so, or very similar at the very least.

  • paginatrix

    Looks like Dita and Christina are wearing the same blouse. Maybe they shop together?

  • Jaeda Laurez

    I don’t know why Christina fights The Fitted. Those pants are hella wrinkly, and that shirt is the exact opposite of what a woman with large breasts should be doing with her life. Even the sad little belt does nothing for her waist.

    • Mazenderan

      I think she gets fed up of the classic hourglass shape and the options she has with it. I think that it sometimes feels hard to be very fashionable/edgy as an hourglass – everything that suits best tends to be ‘classic’.

      She definitely seems to have a liking for fussiness around the collar, as well as general gauzy, floaty fabric. There must be someone out there who could reconcile those things with a more flattering look for her,

      On saying that – I don’t actually hate this too much. I think she could look better – but the colour blocking does trick the eye into thinking she’s less busty at first glance – even if the side of the garment give her away. The trousers could like good but, like you say, the fabric is annoyingly wrinkly.

      • marlie

        And with the right design, she can still incorporate some of the elements that she likes with a shape that’s flattering to her. She just seems to have not figured that out yet.

      • MilaXX

        I don’t know if I would call Tadashi classic & the few time she has worn his things they looked fab on her. I thought the color blocking actually made her look larger.

  • lexilexi

    I’m sorry to say but Goldie & Marisa – not great ads for facial work.

  • Jacquelyn

    *sigh* Christina Hendricks. Seriously. Will you please just go to Janie and ask her to be your personal dresser. Just be Joan at all time.

    Michelle Dockerty looks great. I think she’s finally figured out what to do with herself.

    • marlie

      She doesn’t even have to “be” Joan all of the time. But she needs to find someone – perhaps Janie – who knows how to dress her body in the most flattering way. It doesn’t always have to be Joan-type dresses, but it’s certainly NOT what she has on here…

      • Jacquelyn

        You’re right of course. I think I more or less meant she needs to find a way to look as good off Mad Men as she does on.

      • MilaXX

        Exactly. She needs someone who can marry her love of romantic pieces with styles that fit her body. She also needs someone to help her not default to black.

    • Shawn EH

      Agree completely about Michelle. She’s living up to Lady Mary IRL these days.

  • Molly and Nina, Mutt and Jeff. Very funny! Also love the “plegma” reference. That’s my major association with Marisa too. Hahahahaha.

  • Beth513

    Was there something on this page besides Kerry Rhodes? I totally missed it. I’ll have to go back and look again.

  • JP

    Christina and Dita are totally wearing the same blouse — and it suits neither of them.

    • Judy_S

      I had the same impression, but I thought it looked better on Christina than on Dita. Which makes no sense… but there. It could be the camera angle.

  • PastryGoddess

    What ate Katie Cassidy’s neck?

  • Monday1900

    Oh, Christina! That blouse is just a no-brainer that it will look bad on you, what were you thinking?

  • PastryGoddess

    Christina Hendricks would look great in Jenny Packham’s collection. Simple yet Luxe

  • LuisaNL

    wow, anthony kiedis, WTF??? between the stupid hair and the ‘stache, I didn’t even recognise him.

  • steeg of their own

    Did no one send out the press release that kaufmanfranco was hosting Vampire Fashion Week? What a shame. All these mainstream press reporters and photogs got pulled into an event that was clearly only for vampires. How else does one explain all that badly-fitted pleather and unbecoming eyeshadow?

    The good news is, TLO escaped without being bitten. Ms. Reeves, however, might want to watch out.

  • Frank_821

    Wow on that Kerry Rhodes. I always like seeing a man who can ooze masculinity without coming off like a douche

  • fringebenefit

    Ashley Greene for the win.

  • marlie

    Christina and Dita seem to be wearing the exact same top, and it doesn’t suit either of them, for the same reasons. A rare misstep for Miss Dita. Christina needs an intervention.

    Anthony Kiedis, that’s not your hair OR mustache.

    The three dominatrix ladies all look FAB.

  • random_poster

    TLo: If you don’t already know, searching Google for “Der plegma. Dat comes in der tubes” brings up your Cabaret post as the very first item. I was quite delighted!

  • Imasewsure

    “Der plegma. Dat comes in der tubes.” HILARIOUS

  • MilaXX

    Who would have thought in a million years that Christina Hendrix & Dita Von Teese would make the same fashion misstep?
    Katie Cassidy appears to be wearing stage makeup ALL THE TIME & wow are those some strong genes in that family.

  • Janet B

    Clearly not the blouse for Christina Hendricks or Dita Von Teese.

  • Ramon Figueroa

    Re: Marisa Berenson:

    Natalia: For-ni-ca-tion?
    Sally: Oh, uh, Bri, darling, what is the German word?
    Brian Roberts: I don’t remember.
    Sally: [thinking] Oh… um… oh yes!
    Brian Roberts: Oh, no…
    Sally: Bumsen!
    Natalia: [appalled] Oh.
    Brian Roberts: That would be the one German word you pronounce perfectly.
    Sally: Well, I ought to. I spent the entire afternoon bumsening like mad with this ghastly old producer who promised to get me a contract.
    Sally: Gin, Miss Landauer?

  • Susan Collier

    When did Anthony Kiedis get a Chris Gaines haircut?

    • tonibaloney

      The Fug Girls christened this look “Rewarmed Ken Paves” but I think the obvious dye job does bring Chris Gaines to mind. Unfortunate.

  • housefulofboys

    Are Christina and Dita wearing the same blouse? Unfortunate choice for both.

  • Orange dresses with black toenail polish – the new black. This post and many others during the Fashion Week blitz!

  • formerlyAnon

    Thanks TLo. You’ve eased the morning nicely with collections and attendees I’d NEVER spend the time to hunt down separately on line. So much enjoyment and so much judging. Balm for my cranky, impatient soul.

  • Danielle

    Daisy Fuentes! What an obscure reference!

    • The only time I ever see her is on these Fashion Week posts. What does she do the rest of the year?

      • VictoriaDiNardo

        Funny, they were just talking about her on, I think it was CNBC this morning. She a merchandising juggernaut – multi millions at Kohls, also accessories, videos, hosts Telemundo’s kid version of The Voice. She’s a smart cookie. And does a lot for charity in Miami.

        • I’m obviously not in her demographic and don’t live in Miami, so to me she’s invisible. Glad to hear she’s so busy and successful.

      • Danielle

        Does she still have that clothing line at Kohls? I wonder how much of her time that occupies.

  • Lilithcat

    I’m surprised at Dita. She usually has a much better handle on her style.

    And who stole Katie Cassidy’s neck?

  • teensmom99

    Just introduced my teen to cabaret so I was thrilled to see Marissa-looking wunderbar.

  • quiltrx

    Anthony, you are depressing on SO many levels these days

  • CurbGirl

    Katie Cassidy’s face looks 2 dimensional, like a cardboard mask.

  • Erica_Vuitton

    Oh boy, you can tell by Dita’s face she KNOWS that is not her look.

    Molly’s hot pink taffeta dress is way too juvenile for her especially when styled with that little chain purse. Nope.

    Fug Girls said it best Anthony Kiedis looks exactly like Ken Paves (hair guru to the stars and former J. Simpson BFF).

  • ‘Becca’lise Deveaux

    Haha the Cabaret reference made me choke a little.

  • Therese Bohn

    Goldie and Marissa!!! Glad you spotted these two Lady Liberties. 🙂 I miss 70’s celebrities.

  • I’m gonna go ahead & disagree, I think Hendricks is working it.

    • Shawn EH

      She actually looks better in that top than Dita does, which is weird.

  • Kristobel

    Um. Kerry Rhodes’ pants are holding on for dear life. DAMN. And I laughed out loud at Anthony Kiedis. So sad.

  • VictoriaDiNardo

    I don’t know who Keidis and Vestrgaard are, but all I can see is Sonny and Cher!

    • Shawn EH

      Please say she’s his daughter and not his girlfriend!

    • martha

      I thought the same thing!

  • Trickytrisha

    For a moment there, when I saw Dita von T, I thought that Christina Hendricks had dyed her hair real quick and donned a very similar pantsuit to the black and white one in the first pic. That’s not especially a good thing for either of them.

    Michelle Dockery is killing it lately. Is there anyone home behind Katie Cassidy’s eyes? (and who is she anyway?) Is Anthony Kiedis ill? He looks perfectly awful.

    Kerry Rhodes needs to be in every picture on this blog. Just put a little thumbnail of him in each pic, TLo. We’ll all thank you.

  • Who the heck is Tinsley Mortimar? Who names their child that? And yes, I know I could look it up.
    Though both have had a lot of work, Goldie still looks a lot like Goldie and a lot like her daughter in this pic. But Marisa Berenson? I mean really. Who did that to her? I wouldn’t have even recognized her without the caption.
    And Nina looks fashion-tastic and Molly Sims looks like she is going to prom.

    • demidaemon

      Tinsley is some annoying NY socialite who claims to be a fashionista or fashion designer or something. I only know of her because she was on the long-forgotten The Fashion Show a couple of years ago.

  • martha

    Katy Cassidy is unreconizable with all that make-up, and she is so lovely with a fresh face!

  • DeTrop

    Michelle Dockery is a very attractive woman but she needs bangs or a dip over her forehead. Maybe it’s just that her hair is so dark and her skin so fair but I don’t find her bare forehead at all attractive.

  • Lilak

    Goldie and Marisa look so (enviably) SECURE. A rarity at these things.

  • e jerry powell

    Maybe Dita and Christina were doing lunch after?

  • e jerry powell

    Jane Krakowski needs to go home and try again with that hair. It’s like she’s been possessed by Gothic Gwyneth.

  • Tatiana Luján

    I wonder how would Michelle Dockery look with bangs.

  • that last couple looks like bad Sonny & Cher impersonators

  • kathrineb

    Michelle Dockery looks great. Love the outfit!