New York Fashion Week Spring 2014 Front Row: Day 1

Posted on September 06, 2013

Yes, it’s Fashion Week once again, darlings! That magical time when fashion editors are treated like celebrities and actual celebrities are treated like cattle! Come with us as we watch them all attempt to pose for pictures in a sweaty, frantic tent full of bitterness, regret, and old grudges!

Hit it, fashion people!


BCBG Max Azria Spring 2014 Show

Girl, that is entirely too much lace. Nothing matches.

Heidi Klum

Even the Heidster opted for pants in this crowd. Her micro-minis don’t work well for the front row.

Jamie Chung

Cute. A little overwrought.

Cara Santana and Jesse Metcalfe

Laurianne Mae


Costello Tagliapietra Spring 2014 Show
Alan Cumming

A-FUCKING-DORABLE. Robert Downey, Jr: THIS is how you pair sneakers with a suit.

Debi Mazar

Gorgeous dress.

Patrick McDonald


Desigual Spring 2014 Show
Isabella Rossellini

LUV HUH. She and Alan Cummings should get together and compare footwear.

Toni Trucks


Nicholas K Spring 2014 Show
Alex McCord


Eric West

Tashiana Washington


Richard Chai LOVE Spring 2014 Show
Christina Ricci

Super cute.

Colton Haynes

SUPER cute, but probably trying a bit hard. Talk to Alan Cumming, kid.

Jonas Brothers


Zachary Quinto



Tadashi Shoji Spring 2014 Show
Alyssa Milano

That’s a lot of boob for Fashion Week, girl.

Louis Roe

Patina Miller, Amber Riley and J. Alexander

We wish they’d sat us in that section.

Bella Thorne

A little grownup for a teen star.

Patina Miller

Great color on her.

Rochelle Aytes




[Photo Credit: Getty Images]

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  • MsKitty

    That guy giving the side eye of death to Heidi Klum is cracking me up.

    Patrick McDonald FTW

    • Anathema_Device

      I know. It is a total “who farted?” face.

      • Eric Stott

        Could it be a particularly Bitter Kitten?

        • Pudgy Possum

          Props for noticing that dude!

    • kimmeister

      I’d be giving Heidi side eye too if I saw her wearing that Chico’s vest.

  • Clueless_Jock

    Alan Cumming has to be the most stylish man in existence.

  • LadyCelia

    Is it just me, or is Patrick McDonald channeling Cecil Beaton?

    • Eric Stott

      I think he dug up Beaton, had his remains reduced to a powder and mainlined him!

  • Jacquelyn

    Can’t stop laughing at the guy in Heidi’s picture.

    Love Patina Miller’s dress.

    Alyssa Milano’s dress is a bit of an eyesore for me.

    • Eric Stott

      Sometimes the best part of these pictures is someone caught unawares in the background

    • demidaemon

      No kidding! Especially with her boobs constantly jumping out of the photo and hitting you in the face!

    • Violina23

      Her boobs look like a topographical map…

  • hughman

    Who on earth would willingly wear a long dress to one of these shows? One errant bitch fight and you are trampled at the door by everyone fleeing the scene.

  • ChaCha_70

    Isabella! bowing down.

  • MilaXX

    The gay daddies shut it down! Alan Cummings and Patrick McDonald for the win. Special shout out to J. Alexander & Amber Riley’s crew. They look like they are having fun.

    • decormaven

      Absolutely! Always love seeing Patrick M’s looks.

  • ConnieBV

    I hate the fit on Alan Cumming’s suit and I’m not a fan of the shoes, look like too much like Tims. Colton Haynes did way better, except his pants are a bit short and those tassels are a bit much. Patrick McDonald bothers me with the brown bag and black/white/yellow ensemble. Christina Ricci is my spirit animal. Debi Mazar has a serious titscrepancy.

  • Lori

    It’s not just that Alyssa Milano’s dress is showing a lot of boob, it’s the horrible things the it’s doing to them. Dang, that’s just mean.

    • MilaXX

      Yep, some people simply cannot go braless after they have had a baby.

      • Anplica Fiore

        Some people cannot go braless BEFORE they have a baby as well…

        • MilaXX

          True. Especially natural D cups and above, but in Alyssa’s case I think she used to be able to.

      • rag254

        Eh, I think the tops a wee too big and its’ giving a horrible illusion.

    • shorty j

      I just wanna grab the dress and yank it up a couple of inches.

      • Lori

        But then that peplum would become a boob ruffle, which is not really an improvement. I think that top is just all wrong on her & there’s no saving it.

        • Eric Stott

          That illusion netting is creating a strange illusion on her cleavage…like a trans dimensional portal that will suck you in if you get too close

          • KateShouldBeWorking

            Since you mention boob-physics: I was thinking that perhaps both boobs are positively-charged and are repelling each other.

    • Deb_Lynn

      I think the problem with her dress is that it’s too long for her body. There’s too much sheer bodice, and those black sweetheart shapes should be fully over TOP of her breasticles, not just barely covering the nips.

    • Yes, but did you see her sex tape? I LOVE her. Ill-advised boob-molesting dress and all.

  • valerie saenz

    That photo of Patina Miller in the cute red dress …. LOOK at the shoes on the girl behind her !!! White toe nail polish fooled my eye for a second …. I thought the shoe had metallic tips. HaHaHa

  • TAGinMO

    It’s Semi-Homemade with Alex McCord!

  • Anathema_Device

    It must be a trip seeing such a mish mash of styles at the shows. Some are dressed in evening wear, some in nice day looks, some in eye-searing affronts to my eyes.

    I will show some of these pics to my husband. He just purchased a pair of gold nubuck monk straps and hasn’t worn them yet. I think he feels like they were a good idea in the store but doesn’t have the nerve to deploy them yet. He needs a nudge.

    • Jessica Freeman

      Then there’s Eric in his pajamas….

  • Monday1900

    I had such a crush on Isabella Rossellini in high school that I had her picture in my locker; still love her. And Alan Cummiing never disappoints.

  • charlbot

    Alyssa Milano is pulling out the lite version of Ursula from The Little Mermaid, and however juvenile it might be to say it, I’m pretty much all about that.

  • Jessica Freeman

    Still with the sheer? Lace? Really? I had hoped fashion week would bring something else….

  • PinkySlinky

    Patrick McDonald I need that coat like pronto…

  • imspinningaround

    So much contouring on Patina Miller! Girl, dial it back, you look like Coco Montrese.

    Are the Jonas Brothers Lilliputs or what? I just wanna put them and their eyebrows in my pocket and take them home.

    • Not having any teenage girls in my life since the ’80s, I was barely aware that the Jonas Bros. existed. Now that they’re grown up and I’m seeing them in interviews, I quite like them. They are all very smart and funny.

  • Spicytomato1

    “…frantic tent full of bitterness, regret, and old grudges!”

    Hmm. I’d always thought it would be fun to go to Fashion Week but you make it sound not much different than a typical get together in my family. Eek.

    That said, I love poring over these photos. Patina Miller is perfection.

  • marlie

    I’m actually a little disappointed with Alan Cumming’s suit. I hate the fit of the pants. Patina Miller looks lovely. I hate how Alyssa Milano’s dress makes her look wide around the middle. Patrick McDonald… to DIE.

  • sagecreek

    So nice to see Debi Mazar!

    • largishbearishAtlish

      and who knew she could pull it together like that? Dang! Wow! Bowing!

  • Imasewsure

    The women look so boring… Alan Cumming must part crowds of squealing fan girls (and boys) like a Fashion Moses at this point. He is awesome

  • YoungSally

    Someone needs to revive the IT Crowd from the UK and have ZQ play Moss.

  • Sarah

    Yay for Miss J! I miss him on my TV, but I’m glad to see he’s still in the firmament of runway fashion where he belongs.

  • PeggyOC

    Middle Jonas, that suit needs to burn. It looks terrible on you.

    • Ginny Ellsworth

      Can you throw all three of them on the fire. I had hoped they had hit their past due date.

  • amanda siegelson

    i actually love the way the girl to the left of patina miller looks. that shorts catsuit and those shoes (especially with the white toenail polish) are so cute. love christina ricci as well!

  • Qitkat

    I love Isabella Rossellini, and how she embraces being older, and becoming not so svelte. But that is a tent she is wearing and it makes me frown.
    At least we can always count on Alan Cumming and Patrick McDonald to Shut. It. Down.

  • Dennis

    Jessie Metcalf looks like such a douche, but damn that boy fine! and I covet that cardi

  • Chickadeep

    I could not love Alan Cumming more. Hearts and snaps to Isabella R. for being true to herself. Coveting Debi Mazar’s dress; she knows how to work the vintage vibe without being too literal. Christina Ricci is adorbs.

    • Aurumgirl

      My husband showed me a photo of Debi Mazar seated with Alan Cumming (which would not have been a bad area to be in). Anyway, he meant to remind me that I already have Debi’s dress–but mine is cap sleeved and cobalt blue. I keep forgetting it’s in my closet, but now I’m going to wear it ASAP, because that cut is flattering as hell.

  • alyce1213

    Sorry guys, Alan Cummings is not doing it for me this time. The plaid’s eye-catching, but the pants fit terribly and make him look bowlegged. The sneakers are a hideous color, dirty, and should be burned.
    Isabella Rossellini is so classically beautiful and should not be wearing that stiff sack, like a dowager.
    Patina Miller looks great.

    • HM3

      THANK YOU. I just commented the same. Besides inciting a viscerally BAD reaction from me, the entire situation waist-downards appears to be contrary to everything TLo has taught us. Pants that don’t fit, a puddle of fabric at the bottom, and mismatched (if not ugly) shoes. Why does my universe seem to be tilted?!

  • decormaven

    Is the blue bra in Estelle’s look part of the design, or did she just decide to go with a very visible bra under the lace?

  • lobsterlen

    The guy next to Heidi looks terrified.

  • MarieLD

    only the people in the front rows get goody bags?

    • e jerry powell

      Only the people in the front rows exist.

  • Evan

    Colton Haynes… Talk about a chiseled face. He makes me swoon. There’s been rumors that he’s gay too. I hope he plays for my team so I have a chance, no matter how microscopic that chance may be.

  • e jerry powell

    Patina Miller is effing SICKENING. I genuflect.

    I see that Metcalfe brought his douche face.

    Cumming seems to have a plaid addiction. Could be a Scottish thing, though.

    It seems that Mazar is trying to work a very vague Dita von Teese vibe, but the face isn’t quite right, but the dress orks for her.

    Appropriate or not, there is never too much boob for Alyssa Milano. At least that’s what she believes.

    • demidaemon

      And will get to see more of it! Alyssa Milano’s boobs, coming this fall on PR All-Stars!

      • e jerry powell

        I have to wonder: will we be getting opinions from each of them?

        • wontons

          In fashion, they’re either in or they’re out.

          • e jerry powell

            Oh, we know she doesn’t let those puppies out anywhere near a camera anymore…

  • HM3

    Alan Cummings only looks fabulous from the waist-up, but HIDEOUS otherwise. The bagginess of the trouser, combined with its pattern and the bulky, what-looks-like-Timberland-boot-sneaker looks like pajamas on a lumberjack. I realize that photos aren’t going to capture the full effect of the outfit, but shouldn’t someone look LESS wide at the bottom with a camera pointed at their head? I pray RDJ learns to fit his pants (and select his shoes) better.
    Colton Haynes, on the contrary, seems to have figured it out. But the hairstyle is mismatched.

  • elemspbee

    too much lace. yuch.

  • Darren Nesbitt

    I don’t like the shoes Amber Riley wore with that black dress. (Also I don’t know half these people).

  • GorgeousThings

    Patina Miller is awesome! I saw her in Pippin when it was playing at the ART before it went to Broadway. She’s gorgeous, she’s incredibly talented, she’s got amazing guns, and she seems like she’s a genuinely nice lady.

    As a side note, Zachary Quinto was at the ART performing in The Glass Menagerie. I wasn’t able to make it to that, which disappointed me, but he looks so cute here, especially coming on the heels of the Douchebag Trio.

    • Courtney

      I saw the show in July, and “amazing guns” doesn’t give half enough credit, I think.

  • largishbearishAtlish

    …and the Jonas Brothers will be taking your dinner order….
    does this look like a photo shoot for Waiter Uniforms? (only for the painfully hip places)

    • Alloy Jane

      I totally read that as “Waiter Unibrow” but mostly because all I see when I look at them is a single run-on eyebrow.

  • JasmineAM

    Bella Thorne is FIFTEEN. What?!?! Girl, I’m only 21, but you need to go home and change into something a little less adult.

    • largishbearishAtlish

      was thinking the same thing….wait til your…at least 23 or 40…

    • pop_top

      I would have never guessed that she was 15 – I thought she was 19 or 20.

  • largishbearishAtlish

    why is (who is) Louis Roe wearing her flannel sheets to an event like this? all she needs is her teddy bear and kindle.

  • Lilak

    Just so, TLo: Rossellini & Cumming are, no lie, my dream next door neighbors.

  • Candigirl1968

    I love the that Isabella and Alan’s shoes are quietly saying “these shoes are made for walking, not just posing.” Bringing practicality and chic to Fashion Week.

  • Trickytrisha

    Alan Cumming (oh, the jokes he must have endured over that last name!) gives off happy sparkle rainbows every time I see him.

    I don’t know who half these people are. I suppose I need to turn in my BK card now?

  • SorayaS

    The Jonas Brothers: HAHAHAHAHA also, boring.

  • ItsDicey

    Alan Cumming FTW. Freaking love it.

  • LaSylphide

    Alan shows everybody else how it’s done. Again. He should be a National Fashion Treasure.

  • Brad Watson

    The Jonas shot is the most entertaining thing I’ve seen out of Fashion Week so far. Can’t decide if they’re refugee dress extras from “Battlestar Galactica” or Grace Jones’ security detail.