Cate Blanchett in Christopher Kane at the “Blue Jasmine” Paris Premiere

Posted on August 28, 2013

After the VMAs, we’re feeling a strong urge to get away from the red carpet and out into the streets, but we can’t let this one go by:

 

Cate Blanchett attends the premiere of “Blue Jasmine” in Paris in Christopher Kane.

Christopher Kane Resort 2014 Collection

Well. That’s … something, alright.

Honestly, to whatever extent this is working, it’s working because it’s on Cate Blanchett. Except for maybe Tilda, we doubt anyone else could wear this without looking batshit insane or like they just walked away from some horrible, flaming industrial accident.

And yet, we find ourselves wondering if she shouldn’t have chosen different shoes.

Y’know, their names get bandied about together so often, we fear we’d spontaneously combust if Cate & Tilda ever did a movie together. The red carpet coverage would be orgasmic. The pre-release six months of Vogue and W editorials would be delicious. This needs to happen. They should do a remake of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane? just to make gay men erupt into sparkles from sea to shining sea.

Someone Kickstart this.

 

[Photo Credit: INFPhoto.com, style.com]

    • werika

      I dunno. Cate is glowing as usual but that is some icky dress: the top half looks like the carcass of a an animal shriveling in the sun.

    • Daisy Walker

      I could almost get behind this if it wasn’t for the hem. Well, maybe almost is too strong a word. Still luv huh tho.

    • Flavia Pantoja

      Oh no no no no! I mean, this is a bad dress and I cannot fathom the thought of seeing HER -such a love affair of mine- in something like this! She must be having a bad, a terrible day! This is an OUT for me… #sigh

    • moxie_lady

      Even la Cate can’t save this dress (however, I did just notice the face in it, which I’m creepily enjoying). The nude shoes just add insult to injury.

      • Eclectic Mayhem

        *scrolls back up* *sees face* *laughs*

      • kmk05

        Oh, that face is just creepy.

      • Little_Olive

        The FACE! That is too precise not to be a propos. wtf, designer person. The dress didn’t need it.

      • Mrs. C

        Second scroll down–notice the face. Third scroll–down, notice the flower. Please, Kate, turn around. Your dress is like the “find the hidden objects” game from Highlights magazine. ( I’m showing my age here.)

        • Katie

          Fourth scroll down, notice the naked lady… Is this a Rorschach Test in dress form?

        • kimmeister

          That magazine was the saving grace of all of my childhood dentist and doctor appointments. Is it not around anymore???

          • Betsy

            Oh, it’s still there. Retreads of everything you loved it for as a child.

            • kimmeister

              Goofus and Gallant too? I fear these days that most kids wouldn’t be able to relate to Gallant.

      • sojourneryouth

        I wouldn’t mind the face so much, were it not so effing random. I guess the whole dress is random, but the face and the flower make no sense together. If it was just the flower, and the dress had a bit more shape to it (because the nude under the random webby design makes it look kind of randomly lumpy), I could get behind this.

        • rajf

          Plus, I think there’s an actual nude in the webby design on her right side. There’s a breast at about waist level and a navel at the top of her hip/side, and godhelpme a crotch at the side of her hip joint. Is it just me, or does anyone else see this!?!?

          • Kimbolina

            Yes, I see it too. A headless, nude woman…

          • sojourneryouth

            OMG! You are totally right! It all makes sense now. A sentient alien flower is secretly controlling the actions of a horny, voyeuristic Easter Island head. EUREKA!!!

    • SewingSiren

      Love it. And also love that is lined.
      I’ve wanted a Tilda, Cate movie for years with Helen Mirren also.

      • MoHub

        That would just burn up the screen.

        • alyce1213

          Throw in Helena Bonham Carter just for fun.

          • MoHub

            I’m not sure I’d let Tim Burton direct Cate, Tilda, and Queen Helen—and you know that’s what would happen if HBC were in it.

            • alyce1213

              Oh no, he’s not part of the deal.

      • MikeW_Vegas

        Maybe another remake of “The Women? “

    • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

      I love this look. Sure, that dress is really pushing the envelope. But she wears it with such command, that it works for me. And as for Cate and Tilda in a film together, I’m all for it!

      • ballerinawithagun

        Love the idea of this. As a fiber artist I see many ways that it could be improved…Definitely requires black shoes. Was surprised that it was a Kane, his are usually more polished, though it was Rodarte.

        Yes, to Cate and Tilda!

        • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

          Though I love me a classic look, as you well know, I also love things that challenge our traditional notions of beauty and proportion. I find this artful, and compelling looking. Sure, its not wearable by most mortals, but Cate works it with eclat. I would have chosen other shoes as well, probably simple, strappy sandals, in black.

      • Morgendorffer

        Technically they already did a movie together, though they weren’t in any scenes together. They were both in “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button”.

        • Nadia Duran

          Isn’t that also the case for “Lord of the rings”?

    • Michael_Jones

      I think it’s cruel to start Wednesday with pictures of Cate wearing something like this. (I’m expecting an early portion of Sausage Friday to make up for it… ;) )

    • Jessica Freeman

      I’m not so sure I’m on board here. I wished the dress was that wacky web design all over instead of turning into a (sort of) mermaid skirt.

    • babylonsista

      This dress could also work as a delicate, high-fashion red carpet look for Helena Bonham Carter. And we know she’d accessorize the hell out of it.

      • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

        HBC is a fantastic choice. She’d bring her wacky shoes too. But again, as this already reads Witchy to me, I wonder if she would push it over the edge or flip it totally on its ear.

      • MrsAtaxxia

        Came here to say the exact same thing. So glad I am not alone! I would have loved to see HBC in this.

      • Badriya Al-Badi’a

        Exactly what I thought too–add boots and a big hat, and there you go.

      • AmeliaEve

        HBC was my very first thought.

    • Funkykatt

      That looks like something I made in 9th grade Homeec class and I got a passing grade for trying, Who knew I could design for celebrities?
      .

    • Jenna Marie

      Her head looks gorgeous and I really like the neckline on her… but I just can’t support the rest of the dress. She’s pulling it off because she’s Cate. But really, that’s not a great dress.

    • Meg0GayGuys6

      Like Lily Collins, just because the person wearing the dress is beautiful, doesn’t make the dress beautiful. This is an uggo dress on a gorgeous person, that’s all.

      And IF someone was to wear this dress, those are the wrong shoes.

      • Julie

        Isn’t this a lot of what “fashion” is? Ugly stuff that beautiful people can manage to still look beautiful in?

    • GillianHolroyd

      I love how the upper lining matches her skin tone perfectly. The skirt lining is problematic though. I like the outfit overall.

    • Diego!

      I love it, she looks stunning! But I think she chose the wrong shoes tough…

    • PlethoraofBooks

      It is such a Frakendress… it only works because its her, and even then just barely.

    • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

      Well, she’s Cate and just what I needed before stepping into a long, boring meeting. However, it’s very Halloween Couture.

      • Imasewsure

        Home-sewn witch costume for sure

    • Cameron Turner

      Brilliant…you hit the nail on the head… Kate and Tilda should do a Baby Jane remake….

    • MilaXX

      I mostly like it. Something a the lining on the skirting is a little off for me. However, I can’t imagine Cate being the sheer skirt/granny panty type & I’m not sure that would have helped this look.

    • Tatiana Luján

      the top half is interesting and I love her hair and makeup, as usual. But that skirt is ugly AND boring.

    • conniemd

      I guess it is fashion challenging. Being old and having so many fashion “rules” drilled into by sewing at a young age, I am really, really bothered by the fact that EVERYTHING about this dress is unaligned. The right top side of the bodice goes over the shoulder and the left leaves it all bare. The left boob is perfectly proportioned and the right is obliterated. The line design thingy down the front tilts to the right. The right ending of the top is way lower than the left.

      Oh and lastly the underarms look like pouches of fat next to the boobs.

      • ballerinawithagun

        Great analysis! The one on the model is much more balanced and the skirt is much better unlined. Another layer of black tulle or maybe black silk chiffon would have been better than the pale nude for the skirt.

    • A Shiny O’Connor

      She looks like she rolled around in shit you hang around your front door at Halloween – and still looks fab. Next up, Cate wears a gown completely covered in tiny fluffy Easter cake chick decorations.

    • MoHub

      Even Cate couldn’t save this one. It might be KStew’s dress. It would still be ugly, but it’s the KStew “aesthetic.”

    • HVM

      Cate looks lovely as always, but I can’t sign off on this dress. Its just so…. ugly.

    • ersmom

      Kiss of the Spider Woman.

      • 3boysful

        Very good. I was thinking Elvira wants her dress back.

    • Nancer

      This is all kinds of crazy, and I love it! TLo, you are absolutely right; only Cate and Tilda could carry this off. As to the shoes, I think with so much going on with the dress she was right to pick something that would face into the background.

    • Jeremiah Capacillo

      The idea of Tilda as Baby Jane makes me wanna weep in wonder.

    • Maluca

      Sometimes, what passes for “fashion” just isn’t.

    • mjude

      love her. a remake of baby jane, you boys are on to something!

      • MoHub

        It was done already with the Redgrave sisters. It didn’t work.

    • leahpapa

      They could do “Baby Jane,” sure; but after looking at this dress for a solid minute I think a gender-bending “Kiss of the Spider Woman” is a better choice.

    • Terri Terri

      Awful. And it would not matter if it were Tilda.

    • Donna Tabor

      I need that dress to use as Halloween decor. Maybe hang it on a window.

      Whaaa?

    • decormaven

      Oh for black shoes! I could almost get behind this web-strosity of a dress if they had been employed.

    • NYCGlamourpuss

      You know, you make a great point – while there is something about the dress I love, I think it could only work on her. Not even on Tilda, because it still has too much of a feminine edge to it that works on Cate, while Tilda tends to have more of an androgynous style.

      But a Cate and Tilda remake of “WHTBJ”? Fucking hell YES! And gay men wouldn’t be the only ones who would burst from joy at such a spectacular film – this straight woman would love it too! I’ve been using “Baby Jane Hudson” as my guide of what NOT to do, make-up wise, for the past 10 years at least! If I’m at a makeup counter, and the girl insists that I try a fire-engine red lippie? I nicely tell her no thanks, that sure, I could have rocked that when I was 20. But now, at 49, a color like that is a little too, “By the way, Blanche… didja know we have rats in the cellah?”. I then ask her to show me something in a lighter to mid-toned nude pink.

    • DTLAFamilies

      It rubs the lotion on its skin.

    • Judy_S

      A dress like that makes me wonder if I should even be pretending to follow “fashion.” We do not take pleasure in seeing a beautiful woman in a beautiful dress. We look at a woman so beautiful that she can wear something offensively hideous and we still enjoy looking at her.

      • http://www.tomandlorenzo.com/ Tom and Lorenzo

        Well, fashion isn’t always about the beautiful. It’s not always the goal.

        • Judy_S

          I know. It’s really about giving you guys something to talk about! and make me laugh or even think.

    • MissusBee

      SURELY they should be in an updated, gender-bending version of Gentlemen Prefer Blondes, with Blanchett as the angelic gold-digger and Swinton as her androgynous (but awesomely-dressed) pal, Dot. Sophia Vergara can play the streetwise but unfailingly glamorous gumshoe who falls for Dot’s charms, as they try and outsmart an elegant-yet-glowering Mirren as a composite Lord/Lady Beekman. Also: we need the full Paris shopping montage – designer store signs and taxi footage not enough for two goddesses at the height of their clothes-wearing powers.

    • eowyn_of_rohan

      My God! Galadriel is caught in Shelob’s web!

    • Ruthie O

      I don’t know. All I can see are black and white areolas all over her midsection.

    • BrooklynBomber

      Holy crap. I get it, for the character–worn out and coming apart at the seams, Belle Reve covered in cobwebs–but, oy.

    • RussellH88

      Weren’t Cate and Tilda both in Benjamin Button? I don’t know if they shared any scenes, though.

      But I don’t know if I want my Cate/Tilda pairing to be a comedy or a drama. Maybe they could be fashion editor best friends who upon hearing that one of their ex-boyfriends is getting married, decide to go on a cross country road trip to crash his wedding. Or maybe they could go to their high school reunion, like a more editorial version of Romy and Michelle.

    • Lilithcat

      I really, really love the concept of the dress, but it would work much better if it weren’t so all over the place. Think of it without that ruffly bit at the shoulder, the bodice straight across the hips or, at least, cut the same way on both sides, and a hem that made up its mind what length to be. I think that could be beautiful.

    • http://melaniesuzanne.blogspot.com/ Melanie Suzanne

      This is why I don’t understand capital F “Fashion”.

      “[Cate & Tilda] should do a remake of Whatever Happened to Baby Jane?” YES, PLEASE.

    • LadyCelia

      Well if you’re going to wear a lace dress, having it form a face, nude torso, and a poppy at least makes it interesting. Not attractive, but interesting.

    • hillmad

      All I can see is that CREEPY face on her left side! I can’t tell if it is trying to eat its way out or burrow its way in! *shudder* But Cate still manages to look beautiful and serene.

      • AnneElliot

        Now I can’t unsee it. Also there is a tiny little human outline over her sternum. At first I thought it was waving its arms, screaming to escape, but upon closer inspection it looks like it’s pounding a sledgehammer. Bizarre.

        But I can totally see Helena Bonham Carter wearing this dress. She would tip it over into crazy territory, undoubtedly.

    • Little_Olive

      Wasn’t there a micro-tremd with pantyhose like this?

      Anyway, she is so pulling a CATE (opposite of Jolie: carrying extremely hard pieces as if they were your favorite jeans) that what I dislike more is the sheer skirt.

    • http://wipgirl.wordpress.com Kristel

      Cate Blanchett is just luminous. The dress may be ugly/strange, but every time I see a picture of her, my eye just stutters past the clothes and focuses on her face anyway.

    • Claudia

      She is always beautiful, but this look is not. Its crazy.

    • sagecreek

      A rare misstep, but a misstep indeed.

    • alyce1213

      I can only laugh when I imagine lesser mortals trying to wear this bizarre dress. Cate pulls it off somehow. She’s committed, and it looks much better on her than on the model. (I think there’s something a little vulgar about the dress on the model.)

    • Josefina Madariaga Suárez

      While the dress is a little bit problematic and I wish she had chosen some black shoes, the truth is that she looks untouchable and I gasped when I saw her. It’s true, though, that only Cate and Tilda (and maybe, by a long shot, miss Dita) can make this look work.

    • RussellH88

      That little cluster of thread on the left makes it look like her boob is sagging down to her belly button.

    • Slade Thunderdragon

      That lace is beautiful. It’s the skirt that I don’t really care for. I either wish it was shorter and not sheer, or if the lace thing continued down further and there was no skirt.

    • Qitkat

      She wears this, and the shoes are what warrants criticism? I give up, clearly she and Tilda walk on water!
      It’s a spider on a bad acid trip.

    • Shawn EH

      Tilda and Cate in a hipster version of Gone With the Wind, in the style of Dynasty, but with only the Scarlett and Melanie parts. Oh, boy, I just described every Charles Busch film.

    • MissMariRose

      i like the idea of the spider-webby part of the dress that looks like a lilly, but the way it falls apart at the waist and sides just looking like a tennis net makes the whole thing feel like the designer just gave up on the idea halfway through.

      (Or was being called to the runway by Tim Gunn and didn’t have time to finish the garment.)

    • thecitysleeps

      Nope, not even Cate can save this.

    • Chuck Barthelme

      That is one awful dress. I definitely agree, that to the extent it looks presentable at all, it’s purely because it’s on Cate.

    • Tanya Wade

      I want to copy this in knit form. I kind of love it? It’s Kiss of the Spider Dress something-ness, I know. But the heart wants what it wants.

      • Qitkat

        I know. My comment earlier sounds like I hate it, but I don’t, not really. What I do hate is the placing of Cate and Tilda on pedestals of fashion worship. I just don’t swing that way. Anyhow, back to this concept, I once made a crazy weaving that this reminds me of, so I understand wherewith you cometh. Ha!

    • ashtangajunkie

      She’s fashion magic. The dress is pretty hideous and I still think she looks fantastic. She and Tilda in a movie together? Could our little fashion-loving hearts take it? Mine might explode.

    • fiestyfashionfem

      Fashion designers are just fucking with us now. Seriously. This is just ridiculous.

    • SugarSnap108

      I believe she was forced into this dress. You can see evidence of a desperate struggle. On the other hand — She remains a goddess.

      • Contralto

        Her eyes definitely are not smiling.

    • Tess Danesi

      Only on Halloween would this dress work, even on the illustrious Cate, and only if topped by a black pointy hat.

    • Jennifer Peters-Ahnberg

      I nearly fainted at the thought of Tilda and Cate in a movie together. The dress is creepy though.

    • nicewilliams

      I think your utter love of Cate is blinding you a bit in this instance. DRESS IS FUG

    • Miss WKS

      That face woven in the right side of the netting is AMAZING. I love this dress.

    • Janet B

      Certainly interesting. I’d love to see a 360 view of this dress.

    • bertkeeter

      PROJECT RUNWAY meets SCREEN GODESS!

    • Imasewsure

      Wow this is one seriously ugly dress

    • quiltrx

      Wow–I got the flower right off, but the other BKs tuned me on to the face (which I pretty much love–very 80s sci-fi) and naked lady body. This is a weird dress, but it sure is interesting. It certainly makes my mind start churning with how I might incorporate ‘secret pictures’ in my quilting!

    • LesYeuxHiboux

      It’s working like gangbusters up around her face, then around the midsection it just looks like she’s busting a gut. A rare misstep.

    • ThaliaMenninger

      If Edward Gorey had been a fashion designer…

    • fauxprah

      bat. shit. crazy. that one.

    • Jacqueline Wessel

      Sorry, all I see is the creepy face staring up at her boob and the uneven hem is giving me twitches.

    • marlie

      It looks like she got caught in a fishing net. And since it’s Cate, it almost works, though I would have gone with black shoes.

      And yes, someone needs to make a movie with Cate and Tilda happen.

    • kimmeister

      It looks like it was woven by an elderly spider, and then attacked by a cat.

    • Danielle

      From the neck up, perfection as usual. From the neck down… oh dear.

    • Jacquelyn

      Man that is one ugly garment.

    • JauntyJohn

      I remember this one National Geographic Special where some scientist gave spiders LSD…

    • LauraAgain

      Spider web.

      I’m glad she didn’t wear the neckline like the model does … who has such a long neck anyway? But on the model you can see the flower.

      • kimmeister

        “Leave a message I’ll call you back.”

    • ShaoLinKitten

      It looks like a dress spun by spiders on acid, yet it works. I like the shoes. I think they’re kind of clever with the dress..

    • Lisa M. (ReVoir) Kramp

      I actually love this…it’s more art than fashion. And as always, Cate is rocking it. But I agree with you on the shoes and most definitely the film remake…that would be awesome to infinity. I’ll direct!

    • Belvane

      Google “spiders on drugs” to find the inspiration for this dress.

    • ventureforth

      Did Charlotte the spider branch out into dressmaking?

    • fuchaforeva

      Quel horreur!!! Looks like a cheap Halloween costume from Ricky’s NYC! All is missing is the pointy witch hat and a broom! Lol

    • mickiemonkey

      She can drape it over her front door at Halloween.

    • JuliaInBlack

      She is so lovely, but this dress looks like the kind of shit I would doodle during a long conference call.

    • María José Benites Peralta

      I actually like the ‘spider web’ part of the dress quite a lot. It looks delicate and artsy. A bit risque without being tacky and still demure enough for a classy Lady like her. The woven-in designs (flower, face and female torso) are clever and quite stunning. The skirt part could use some work but overall it’s a really cool dress.

    • Trickytrisha

      Wow, I’m in the minority! I love this one. She’s pulling it off.

    • ItsDicey

      Even this gorgeous creature cannot save this wreck of a dress. No bueno.

    • bassfemme

      The model looks like she’s peeing squid ink.

    • greyhoundgirl

      1. I am grateful she had it lined. 2. There is still a chin way too close to her lady parts.

    • Denise Plank

      Nice to see Justin getting some work.

    • Judih1

      If she were starring in Kiss of the Spider Woman and have different shoes, I could give this a pass. Or if it was a high class Halloween Party she was attending. Other than that – WTF?

    • somebody blonde

      Wow. What a hideous dress. She looks so good, except that she’s wearing a hideous dress.

    • jjtxgrrl

      I looove the dress. Its like a great work of surreal art.

      • jjtxgrrl

        …..Or even M.C. Escher-esque. Very cool.

    • Wendi126

      This dress is the love child of Emilio Sosa and Charlotte of Web fame on acid

    • http://asskickingadviser.com/ Ass Kicking Adviser

      At the first pic all I thought was, ‘on anyone else this would be a hot mess.’ She has superpowers. Speaking of which, I hope TLo saw Blue Jamine because between the clothes (which they did perfectly for her character) and, well, her, it’s 98 minutes of amazing. Watching her go to her crap job in a dentists office carrying her Birkin is just a riot.

    • unbornfawn

      My first reaction, was interesting dress, but I think it isn’t Cate’s dress, it’s Tilda’s. A very tricky dress to wear. I love the spiderweb concept. The shapes need to be worked out better for the boday.

    • Kelly

      It’s not just gay men who would flip over “Baby Jane” with Tilda and Cate. Trust me, your lesbian sisters will be putting’ on our top hats, tyin’ up our white ties, dancing’ in our (butch) tails.

    • little britches

      This is Cher’s dress. The visible lining – and those pumps! – wreck the balance and thus the look. I like the dress: it’s hideous, delicate, and very interesting. I wonder, with its hidden pictures, if it isn’t here a kind of metaphor for Ms. Blanchett’s character? But: give to Cher. She can rock a spiderweb. This would be more intellectual than her general look (but note the model’s hairstyle…); still, I think she’s ridiculously smart and would bring out the camp factor, which deserves some attention too. Neat how this dress has started so many threads of great actresses! Fun.

    • Stacy Feng

      But they DID do a movie together, even though they didn’t share scenes. They were both in The Curious Case of Benjamin Button!

    • Alloy Jane

      Love this dress. Disasters with graphing paper is what I think of when I see it.

      And the only way I’d watch a remake of Baby Jane is if Tilda and Cate were in it. I think the face in that dress would love to see this happen too.

    • lareveuse73

      She forgot the hat. Black, pointy, wide brim.