Cover Girl: Lily Collins in DKNY for Seventeen Magazine

Posted on July 30, 2013

We feel like this cover is yelling at us.

 

Lily Collins covers the September 2013 issue of Seventeen magazine in DKNY photographed by Kenneth Willardt.

No, scratch that. We feel like this cover is a mob of angry teenage girls yelling at us. We just want to tell this cover to calm the hell down and get a hold of itself.

DKNY Fall 2013 Collection

Especially since we like what they picked for Lily to wear and we can’t really see it, what with all the yelling and screaming about CLEAR SKIN PLANS and 856 IDEAS TO SAVE $$$$ HOW-TOs NEVER GET TAGGED BACK-TO-SCHOOL 1D TIX!!!!!!!! GET YOUR DREAM LIFE NOW!!!! RIGHT NOW, DO YOU HEAR ME?!?!?!?!?

Or something.

 

 

[Photo Credit: Kenneth Willardt for Seventeen Magazine, style.com]

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  • Sobaika

    One too many necklaces.

    • Lucía Gavello

      And one too many cocktail rings. Also, that graphic designer needs a chill pill.

      • decormaven

        I’m dying here! Next they will have little audible messages that are activated when the mag is opened, like those cheesy Hallmark audio cards. People, it’s called reading. We want to READ a magazine; if we wanted to listen to or watch messages, we’d be interacting with a different medium.
        Topic? I’d have to get a massage after wearing those heavy necklaces. I will suffer for fashion, but not for those baubles.

      • melisaurus

        What graphic designer? This looks like the crap that other kids did on their power points in highschool.

  • RedRaven617

    Why does a 17 year old need her “dream life now”? I’m 55 and and haven’t had it yet.

    • Lori

      In fairness, a 17 yo’s dream life is rather different than a 55 yo’s. But yeah, whoever wrote that probably needs to get offa my lawn.

      • Domo_Konnichiwa

        Lily collins won’t have the life answers you seek either way.

  • RuthGo

    Please god, no dropped shoulder sweaters!!

  • Diego!

    OMG… That ‘designer’ must go back to college. ASAP

    • largishbearishAtlish

      or back to trying out for Project Runway, season 27….

      • Diego!

        LOL xD I was referring to the graphic designer! Hahaha tough that DKNY dress is pretty ugly…

  • mjude

    LMFAO!

  • http://pleasewelcomeyourjudges.com/ Brian @ PWYJudges

    This screaming cover is the perfect personification of when stans invade TLo’s comments sections.

  • Little_Olive

    The expression on her face makes it seem like she is grabbing her dress in a bad attempt not to fall to the side.

  • gsk241

    Hasn’t the “starlet lifting her skirt” thing run its course yet?

    • demidaemon

      Obviously not.

  • marlie

    Too much going on. I can’t even look at the cover.

  • barbarienne

    I try not to believe the media when they hype how the younger generation is all ADD and demands constant overstimulation, but if this sort of cover is selling magazines, then maybe they’re right.

    Or maybe this sort of cover gets made because the layout folks at Seventeen are reading those stupid articles about short-attention-span teenagers.

    • NoveltyRocker

      Prolly a combination of doing it cuz it is done and hoping all the visual noise makes the issue look packed. A youngin’ need only pick up on one tag they like and assume the rest is just as interesting.

  • Folk Devil

    “Never Get Tagged In The Same Outfit Twice”? Jeezus.

    • Morgendorffer

      And here I thought it was a win if I managed to not wear the same shirt more than once in a week…

      • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

        I work out of two locations. If I can manage to not been seen by others who do the same, and can re-wear an outfit that week, I consider that a win.

        • Folk Devil

          Oy vey. I often wear the same oufit three times a week. But then again, I’m a student with a small and sad-looking wardrobe, not an actual going-to-work adult. Or a teenager with the pressure of never ever getting tagged in the same outfit twice, oh the horror!!!!

      • mlle

        Seriously. I’m proud of myself if I go an entire week without hitting up one of my three go-to dresses, or if it’s been at least 8 days between wears.

    • snarkykitten

      So basically, the new how to bully poor kids. awesome

      • akprincess72

        To be fair, I was raised rather comfortably & my Mom still would’ve put the kibosh on that 8 million outfits thing FAST. Would NOT have flown at all, I wouldn’t even have tried. Though, kids these days all seem to be special little snowflakes…

    • largishbearishAtlish

      not being 17…’tagged’ is 17speak for ‘have sex in’?? so ‘never have sex in the same outfit twice’?

      • Folk Devil

        Haha. I assume they’re referring to facebook. I like your version, though. Sadly, I’m not sure Seventeen would do an “865 outfits to wear when getting laid! Never do it in the same outfit twice!!!!” spread.

    • Little_Olive

      It appalled me too. It also appears to be one of the elements of “the dream life” they promote above.

  • Rand Ortega

    What? I can’t hear you! That cover is screaming at me!

    Talk about marketing overload. SMH.

  • Kent Roby

    Seventeen will probably be the first magazine to imbed actual screams, like the Halloween decorations that shriek when anyone walks by.

    • SewingSiren

      That would be awesome.

    • kimmeister

      Except they’ll be more like valley girl squees “OMG!”

    • largishbearishAtlish

      oh wow, this DOES look like a Craftstore magazine halloweek/holiday circular…

  • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

    What’s your damage, Heather?

    • Qitkat

      What’s the frequency, Kenneth? ;-)

    • AnnPopovic

      Chaos was what killed the dinosaurs, darling..

  • MilaXX

    It’s like the cover has a case of Tourette’s and is yelling out random things. Cute look on Lily though.

  • chill85

    What the hell is a “traumarama”?! I shudder to think.

    • Little_Olive

      It’s a section where readers share personal (fabricated like polyblend) stories of embarrassment.

      • formerlyAnon

        “fabricated like polyblend”

        Nice.

  • Tatiana Luján

    Thanks for the this post, it is really funny.

  • Imasewsure

    I CAN”T HEAR YOU WITH ALL OF THIS YELLING… she is so cute… I don’t care what she wears

  • Tarjay

    She usually has such awesome eyebrows. What did they do to them???

  • ballerinawithagun

    It is!!!! Too many exclamation points. The Eighties are back. No, her hair isn’t quite as big as mine and mine was shaved off on one side.

  • kimmeister

    This is 38 steps back from her last magazine cover, yikes.

  • MannahattaMamma

    please note: never get tagged in the same outfit twice: they are instructing girls in how to dress FOR FACEBOOK.

    • formerlyAnon

      Which is actually on the verge of no longer being a thing, as far as I can tell. Now it’s twitter linked to instagram & vine. (Unless I’ve fallen behind – yet AGAIN.)

      • random_poster

        No, I think you’re spot on. Those to whom we’re telling to get off our collective lawns have become the Instagram/Vine crowd.

  • http://www.ellenciompi.com/ NurseEllen

    it would be notable if “Seventeen” magazine did NOT have a scream-at-you cover, in my opinion. This is par for the course. As someone who is over 3x the age qualification for the magazine, I don’t pay any attention anyway.

  • kmk05

    I feel like her lip colour is warring against the sweater dress colour. I would have rather seen a slightly more orange (or brown-ish or dark peach, maybe) lip colour. With gloss, because the gloss is a good touch (updates it from the matte lips of the late 80s and 90s). Or maybe it’s my monitor.

    And I’m not even gonna try with that cover, jfc.

  • formerlyAnon

    I cannot.

  • largishbearishAtlish

    NEW WEIGHT LOSS TIP! Wear 25 lbs of chains around your neck! wth is that crap? the cloth looks like ‘make dresses out of the remnant bin!”

  • AnnPopovic

    She looks like Jennifer Love Hewitt did 15 years ago. Very cute. Oh. Wait. VERY CUTE!! How’s that?

  • ankali

    That sweater is hideous. The whole cover is just eye-searing, like, it should come with a seizure warning.

  • quiltrx

    I can’t decide if she’s pulling it down because it hiked up to her hips when she bent over, or if she’s about to show us the good china.

    • RebeccaKW

      I think that pose has something to do with the dress being longer than the cover edge.

  • demidaemon

    My problem is with the pose. It looks like she’s about to flash us.

  • H2olovngrl

    The snark is strong in this comments section.

  • akprincess72

    I think I had this in purple & black, IN 1986!!!!!

    Ugh.

  • merciblahblah

    This post, and the entire comments section, wins the internet today. I love you ALL. And for what it’s worth, I’m going to go ahead and disagree that I LOVE that sweater, and would totally wear it. Probably not with the Mr. T Collection for QVC she’s got going on around her neck, but I WOULD wear the dress. True story.

  • queen b*tch

    Seriously, is getting tagged in the same outfit something that kids worry about these days?! I wore the same stone washed jeans and white crop top for the majority of the 90s and no one seemed to care (apart from my mother!)

    • Spicytomato1

      I was thinking the same thing. The teens I know now don’t seem to care about never repeating an outfit. In fact many of the girls adhere to a pretty strict uniform of skinny jeans, uggs and hoodies (or tees and flip flops in the summer).

      • RebeccaKW

        The local teen ‘fashion’ around here are those unflattering running shorts, like Nike or Reebok, the nylon material. Worn with any kind of top. Mismatched socks and topsiders, or Toms.

        • formerlyAnon

          Or, as the frat/srat/wanna-be-bro crowd calls ‘em “norts” (for Nike shorts).

          *sigh* I am embarassed that I know these things. But soon my children will age up and I will know them no longer.

  • carnush

    I love it. I remember that as a teenager I thought that the louder and more colorful, the better. Especially on magazine covers. She looks great!

  • giddypony

    What’s up with her brows?
    And, god,I hope TMI: City of Bones is a big hit because Robert Sheehan’s style “sense” really needs the TLo treatment (huge cardigan with leather jacket over – to the Ballet.)