Channing Tatum on the “Late Show with David Letterman”

Posted on June 28, 2013

Is this a joke? Please tell us this is a joke, Channing.


Channing Tatum makes an appearance on the “Late Show with David Letterman” in New York City.

We confess, it’s a joke we don’t quite understand, but we’re holding out hope that he’s fucking with us.

Oh god. The “Bros don’t tie their shoes” thing is really back, isn’t it?


[Photo Credit: Enrique RC/]

    • Tess Danesi

      Working so hard to kill what god gave you. No, Channing, just no.

    • Diego!

      With such a perfect face, I won’t even bother if he weighed 400lbs! He looks a little bit bigger than he regularly is (?) but I forgive him! hahaha 😛

      • Lori

        Maybe he got someone to greenlight that chess on the beach movie*. More likely he’s just spending more time these days playing with the baby than working out.

        *He said in an interview that he wanted to do a movie that was about playing chess at the beach so that he could stop working out, eat pizza & cheeseburgers, sit in the sun and just generally indulge his inner fat guy. I sort of admired him for admitting that his body is hard work and he doesn’t always want to do it, instead of trying to play off like he’s just naturally god-like and possessed with the metabolism of a gerbil on crack.

      • Derek_anny

        Honestly, I prefer 200lb Channing to 140lb Channing.

    • TheAmericaness

      I’d pay good money to have that hat burned in effigy.

      • ankali

        Why bother with the effigy?

        • TheAmericaness

          Because it would make me happy.

    • Diego!

      Do the line! (?) 😛

    • hughman

      Is it a beret or a snood? A brood? A snoret?

      • Alexander Peterhans

        Whatever it is, it looks very, very sad.

      • eowyn_of_rohan

        It’s a douche-copter.

        • PeaceBang

          OH ya HAD to make me spit out my iced latte, huh?

      • Judy_S

        It is a limp cap.

    • eowyn_of_rohan

      Toto, I don’t think we’re in the frat house anymore.

    • Emily Smith

      “You guys I’m sorry I’m just not really understanding what this song is about”

    • Heather

      Are those… boat shoe boots? I think being untied may be the least of their problems.

      • majorbedhead

        That’s what I was wondering, too. Awful.

      • Guest

        no, those are boots of some sort. Still awful.

    • Danielle L

      Baby boot camp does weird things to a person. Still a hottie.

    • Carleenml

      why would you think it’s a joke? he’s always seemed like the world’s biggest goober to me.

      • filmcricket

        It’s goober-y if you think he’s doing it all in fun. If you think he’s being serious, this is douchetastic.

        • Carleenml

          Oh, I think he’s serious. tomato/tomahto. :)

    • Rand Ortega

      *facepalm* Looks like an extra from “Newsies”. I’m more interested in his assistant to the camera left, 1st photo. She looks like Secret Service & just as deadly.

      • drdarke

        “Hi, I’m the real former Agent Maxwell of the US Secret Service! I will fold you up and stick you in a UPS envelope to Antarctica you don’t get out of my protectee’s way…!”

    • Claudia

      It is exactly for this reason I will blame Jamie Foxx for this fashion misstep. 😉

    • annabelle archer

      You take the boy outta Tampa….

      Doesn’t matter. I want to remove that crooked little hat and sit on his face.

      • ailujailuj

        OMFG. i love you back.

      • Rand Ortega

        Dammit! How many times do I have to tell BK’s to stop making me spit out my coffee?!!!

        • drdarke

          Maybe if you stopped eating before coming onto TLo, @randortega:disqus …?

      • marlie

        You just made me spew food all over my keyboard.

      • Julie Chase

        HA HA HA HA.

      • jmorino08

        I almost peed my pants laughing!!!

    • SayWTH

      Sorry dearest Uncles, it never really left! Although you would think a new dad would realize that shoe tying is a skill that he will need to teach his offspring so there are no scraped extremities in the future!!

    • ChiKat67

      I’m blaming it on the fact that he has a newborn at home and probably hasn’t had a full nights sleep since then.

      • annabelle archer

        Did you read his interview where he said his only jobs right now are to change diapers and bring them food? Such a genuine sweetie. I loved it.

        • Nocturnal

          He was talking about his pit bulls, wasn’t he?

    • JP

      He doesn’t do a thing for me, and in this look, he does less than zero for me. Am I a bad person to want to see him trip?

    • Ann VerWiebe

      He has a new baby at home – he’s sleep-deprived!

    • formerlyAnon

      If he does it for you, the hat & shoes & rumply pants & shirt straight out of the “clean laundry pile” (something that showed up in my house for a while with each new kid – folding is for people with time or help!) isn’t gonna slow you down. I, on the other hand, will try not to laugh uncontrollably. It’s all soooo misguided.

    • Alexander Peterhans

      That is the thickest neck I’ve seen in ages.

    • Lisa Utter

      This just makes him read as more douche than he ever does to me.

      • Jessica Freeman

        Right? I’m finally warming up to this guy and then he does this douche-tastic ensemble with classic white guy peace sign. Ugh. Back to square one.

        • j_anson

          Ugh, I hate the bro peace sign. It’s like, I’m almost making a peace sign, but I don’t actually have any interest in peace, or, indeed, in making an effort, so I’m just going to sort of flop it out there sideways ot give my hands something to do. Bonus: in Britain I might just be flipping you off!

          • PeaceBang

            Which begs the question: what’s the conceptual difference between a peace sign and a “peace out” sign?

    • judybrowni

      His live-in help doesn’t own an iron?

      Okay, maybe.

      But that doesn’t explain the limp, grey-tweed pancake on his head.

      • Nocturnal

        I thought a very large pigeon had nailed his tiny skull. Thanks for pointing out that it was his breakfast,

    • krelnick

      “Oh, I’m a douchecanoe and I don’t care,
      I got big pecs but I got no hair!

      I wear dick books, a wrinkled shirt,
      A silly pancake haaaaaat;
      I wish I were a hipster,
      Instead of a big praaaaaaat!

      “Oh, I’m a douchecanoe and I don’t care,
      I got big pecs but I got no hair!”

    • Jacqueline Wessel

      I’m going with he was up all night with a screaming new baby and got dressed in the dark.

      • j_anson

        That does not explain the hat. Unless he just didn’t have time to wash his hair after the baby spit up.

    • Yolanda13

      Please tell me there is a suit waiting for him in his dressing room. This does not make me want to Channing all over his Tatum.

    • Miss WKS

      D O U C H E

    • Ginny Ellsworth

      Maybe he was Skyping with the wife and wee one and feel asleep. He woke up just in time to throw on clothes and shoes and run out the door? Probably not but he seems like such a nice guy.

    • Calinda_L

      Coming to a theater near you in 2014, Newsies: Now Strip Teasier. It’ll be a blockbuster.

      • sweetestsith

        I would watch it. o.O

    • dalgirl

      Nice tortilla hat-

    • filmcricket

      The worst thing about this is that in the thumbnail the fellow behind him was giving me serious Adam Yauch vibes and now I’m all sad.

    • conniemd

      I don’t get the Channing Tatum appeal at all. He does absolutely nothing for me.

      • Jessica Freeman

        I second that.

      • Tina Power

        Thirded. He looks like a potato and his neck is bigger than his head.

        • charlotte


          • Pennymac

            To infinity and beyond! Uber MEH.

      • Jane Donuts

        I didn’t until I saw Magic Mike.

    • marlie

      What the hell is this? That douchetastic hat and the untied boots (seriously, when the F did that become a “thing”?) make me angry.

    • Nonmercisansfacon

      I don’t get this guy. How he suddenly went from B-list actor to apparently the hottest actor (and People’s sexiest man) in Hollywood in the span of 2 years is mind-boggling. Reminds me of that article from Bill Simmons about Ryan Reynolds.

      • eowyn_of_rohan

        Two words: great publicist.

        • Nonmercisansfacon

          You’re right. His publicist deserves a prize. Don’t they have a Publicist or Personal Assistant of the Year Award (just like I’m sure they have a Stylist of the Year Award!)?

    • Angel O’Leary

      He looks like he has a moldy pancake on his head.

    • Sunraya

      He just got off work pouring concrete, don’t blame him for not tying his shoes – his feet are hot and swollen from standing on them all day.
      Oh, he is a rich and pampered movie star??? Then he is a douche from trying to dress like a real working man.

    • PrunellaV

      Gah! That hat! I guess he’s next in the Brad Pitt I’m-So-Hot-I-Get-To-Dress-Like-Shit parade.

    • CatherineRhodes


    • Just Me

      The new baby vomited on all of his presentable clothes and his assistant caught a rare tropical disease and was therefore unable to pick up his dry cleaning. So, he was forced, FORCED, to drag out clothes he had left over from his first movie (where he played an adorable, but rough around the edges street dancer who winds up as the dance partner to a stuck up ballerina), to meet his contractual obligation to appear on DL. *That’s his story and I’m sticking with it.*

    • Wellworn

      I took one look at this and I laughed…and I laughed. No amount of gorgeous hunkiness can wear that disheveled mess. It’s douchy sausage day today I guess.

    • Gaby

      “How can I make myself look as thick and stumpy as possible? Oh, and throw in a deformed hat for good measure to throw off the symmetry of my face. GOOD TO GO.”
      That poor hat.

    • siriuslover

      Channing Tatum is a clown. Sorry, he’s one of those celebs I ask myself “how’d this dufus get famous?”

    •!/Space_Kitty Space Kitty

      Oh, Christ.

    • Gwyndall

      That completes his trip to Doucheville. Nice handbag, though.

    • Kate4queen

      I’ve never forgiven him for ruining the movie adaptation of The Eagle of the Ninth. He can do no right for me-ever. :)

    • boweryboy

      I can smell the douche fumes through my laptop screen.

      And his head and neck are the same size! What’s up with that?

      • Pennymac

        Time for me to share my inevitable Channing Tatum comment. The man’s head is shaped exactly like a canned ham with ears.

    • irielle

      I think we should give the poor guy a break. He’s got an infant at home. They may have a nanny. They may have two nannies. Who knows? But I still bet he isn’t getting as much sleep as he needs to look as good as he usually looks.

    • largishbearishAtlish

      did he leave the plow and the horse in the limo? looks like he just came from a farm in…(pick a state). Can you smell the stench off those jeans? am shocked we can’t see pit stains in the shirt…

    • katiessh

      leave him alone, he just had a baby. he’s probably only like half awake

    • a_liking

      ugh, untied boots are the worst. trend. also I like the illusion that he is holding a lady’s purse in the bottom pictures.

    • MzzPants

      Tie your goddamn shoes, you moron.

    • ShaoLinKitten

      What has melted onto his head? Is it a beret? Is it a very flabby cap? I has a confused.

      • PeaceBang

        I think it’s a freshly baked tortilla. One of those thick ones.

        • ShaoLinKitten

          With the grill marks still on it! “Son, you got a tortilla on your head.” /Raising Arizona (paraphrase)

    • Susan Velazquez


    • quiltrx

      Gah, he looks like he bought off the mannequin at the Douchenozzle Uniform Store.

    • marshmallowjane

      Is his shirt seersucker? It looks badly wrinkled.

    • Lisa_Co

      The heat here must have melted his brain. Especially choosing those boots. WTF?

    • demidaemon

      He changed for the show, right? RIGHT?!

      I don’t know what’s going on here, but I fear it is either a) some sort of mindfuckery or b) new parent meltdown.

    • Puckndc


    • JanW

      The hat (beret?) is to go with the goatee.

    • jmorino08

      And that hat, “mis”shapen just so… I am an unashamed lover of Chay Tates but this is all douche all the time, bro! Ugh!

    • pattie capet

      well, i think he’s pretty, and he’s been saying how he’s all completely exhausted with his newborn baby and getting no sleep, so i’ve been giving him a clothing pass lately. i guess i don’t care how he’s dressed. i just like him.

    • gefeylich

      I have no idea why this man has a high profile career. Wooden actor, crap dresser, lummox-like demeanor: who is he doing, outside of possibly His Dark Lord Beelzebub?

      There’s no other explanation.

    • drdarke

      “So tell me, Dave – ”

      “Slab Bulkhead!”
      “Fridge Largemeat!”
      “Punt Speedchunk!”
      “Butch Deadlift!”

      • Amy

        Biff McLargehuge!
        Bob Johnson! …oh, wait.

        • drdarke

          We put our faith in Blast Hardcheese, @disqus_ZRmi8a7iIP:disqus …!

    • Therese Bohn

      I know I’m in a tiny minority, but he just doesn’t do anything for me. (Sorry!) The pancake hat and sloppy shoes don’t help. But, hey, whatever floats your boat! Jon Hamm’s more my speed :-)

      • imakeart

        You’re not alone in your boat. I just don’t get him or the fascination with him

    • Sara Leigh Merrey

      Rumpled mess, but a hot rumpled mess.

    • Daktari100

      You gotta know he feels pretty damn good about his own hotness when he can put on a chapeau like that, look in the mirror, and then go outside with it still on his head. I guess when you make people channing all over their tatums, you can get away with practically anything…except, maybe, those untied boots.

      • Daktari100

        …and flashing gangsta signs. Nobody can get away with that and not look like a complete douche, unless you’re actually a “G.”

    • Nocturnal

      How does he get his neck so fat? Is this a new Hollywood plastic surgery fad for men? Guys can’t get fake boobs so are they enlarging their necks? Maybe Channing cant bend his neck down far enough to see those shoe strings?