Zach Galifianakis at ‘The Hangover 3′ Premiere

Posted on May 24, 2013

It’s Sausage Friday once again and we’ve got a whole truckload of XYs to judge today. Let’s start off with Zach, because he’s giving us a sad.

 

Zach Galifianakis attends the premiere of ‘The Hangover III’ in London.

We’ll start off by saying he looks adorable and the suit is fabulously suited to him. But his lower half is making us weep.

Look, we’re not style experts and we never claimed to be. We try not to pass down edicts from (the illusion of sitting) on high to the masses as to how they’re supposed to dress. But guys, we’re telling you; if you really want to dress better, start by getting your pants fitted. It is THE NUMBER ONE style issue facing most regular guys. Zach’s pants probably aren’t too long on him, but they clearly don’t fit well in the waist and hips, causing them to slide down like a pair of jeans.

GUYS: DRESS PANTS ARE NOT JEANS. They are NOT supposed to fit the same way. Of course a belt or a pair of suspenders would’ve helped tremendously here.

In a perfect world, these pants would fit him well around the waist and hips (which means we wouldn’t see his shirt peeking out under his vest) and would fall in a straight line down to his ankles, with a soft break over THE APPROPRIATE DRESS SHOES WHICH HE IS CURRENTLY NOT WEARING.

That’s another thing (we’ll skip the all-caps because we’ve been yelling enough already): Because suit and dress pants are not jeans and not meant to be treated like jeans, you can’t just wear any old shoe with them. Dress pants require dress shoes. Not because we’re sticklers for tradition, but because they are designed to go together and nothing looks as good in comparison. Those boots were not what the tailor had in mind when they made this suit.

The end result here is that Zach actually looks rounder and heavier than he is, which is surely not what his goals were for this outfit. If you’re a style-challenged guy and you want to look stylish for an event, follow the rules set out for you by years of tradition and countless tailors and shoemakers; get the items fitted correctly and pair them with the right shoes. That’s literally 90% of the work of good men’s style right there.

 

[Photo Credit: Getty]

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  • Emily Giovanni

    But how did his 87-year-old awesome date look?

    • Emily Giovanni
    • MissMariRose

      I love that story! He gets a forever pass from me for that. What a great guy!

    • marlie

      I was never a big fan of his – I don’t find him particular funny – but this story will make me love him forever. Such a kind gesture!

      • Emily Giovanni

        Yeah I had a crush on him the first time I saw him, which was in a Fiona Apple music video (for “Not About Love” – look it up). And then I stopped having a crush on him due to The Hangover. And now I have a crush on him again.

    • Nikko Viquiera

      awwwwwwww. all is forgiven!!! bear hug!

    • http://twitter.com/DarrenNesbitt Darren Nesbitt

      Mimi Haist what an awesome name!

  • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

    I come back to what I say to clients all the time, anything is possible for you, if it fits correctly, and is proportioned correctly. One of the sad losses with the death of the studio system, is that stars are allowed to go out in public looking less than perfect. Sigh.
    I think Zack is adorable and I would give him a tumble in a hot minute, but we would get him out of those clothes right quick.

    • MartyBellerMask

      Send him a kilt. He clearly can work a plaid.

      • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

        I should! I bet our Zacky could rock a kilt like crazy.

      • Janet B

        Perfect.

      • Snailstsichr

        Brilliant idea!

    • http://www.facebook.com/fiddlecub Kevin VanOrd

      He’s such an adorable bear, right? A shame about the straightness, though nothing a few shots of whiskey couldn’t temporarily cure.

      • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

        I do love the way you think. If he comes to SF, we will have to test your theory.

        • Oscar Olalde

          So it has come down to this… AGAIN ~ *gives side-eye to Kiltntiltd* *Brandy/Monica’s “The Boy is Mine” plays on the background*

          • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

            Oh, Oscar, doesn’t it ALWAYS come down to this? (smiling slyly)

    • TheAmericaness

      Do you have a business website? I’ve read several of your comments and I’m fascinated! Love your comments by the way!

      • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

        I don’t maintain one, since the clients I do have keep my free time pretty busy.

        And I’m flattered by your interest and compliment.

    • e jerry powell

      True, but the death of the studio system leads, however indirectly, to the rise of the independent personal stylist.

      • http://joyouslifesf.wordpress.com Kiltdntiltd

        True. And we have all seen that its not always the best answer.

        • e jerry powell

          True enough. But some of the problem is the designers getting pushier about getting their brands in front of the masses without having to go on Project Runway. All kinds of agendas that wouldn’t necessarily be stopped by a big studio boss (if anything, the designers might have to start paying studios to get pieces into wardrobe shops).

    • drdarke

      That outfit makes him look like an ill-fitted fireplug, @kiltdntiltd:disqus – and he looks like he needs to bathe.

  • http://twitter.com/AnniNoone AnniNoone

    I am all about fat positivity, but I agree, he looks bigger and, more important, sloppier here than he should. Bigger is bad in Hollywood, and sloppy is bad anywhere. C’mon, Zach, be the bear-fox we know you can be.

  • http://twitter.com/DuBey2 Marie Fessler

    Thank you. Now please make a poster so we can hang it in our husband’s closets

  • SewingSiren

    Or at the very least , give them inappropriate shoes a little shine.

    I like the suit very much. But I fear we are all in danger of having our eye put out when the button on the waistband of those trousers finally blows .

    • Donna Tabor

      LOL

    • Aurumgirl

      They’re Blunnies. They don’t really shine. Zach deserves a beautifully fitted suit.

  • MoHub

    Great suit, crappy fit. And it’s not just the pants; the vest needs to be a few inches longer. Agree totally about the shoes.

  • Lisa M. (ReVoir) Kramp

    I adore that suit, shirt and tie! Please please please PLEASE, guy stars….get yourself a good tailor who can zip over to your place and fit your pants correctly and (in my ‘stern but loving Mom’ voice), “I don’t care if they’re not as comfortable, wear the damn dress shoes!!”

  • Jessica Freeman

    When you see just photo from just the waist up, you think, that suit is perfectly him. Then you see the pants and you just think….Oh. My. God. He could not give 2 fucks. And I really don’t think he does.

  • Eric Stott

    For Zach this is actually pretty good

  • Spicytomato1

    I love the suit and think the colors of the shirt and tie are inspired, complimentary choices. The thing that throws me more than the work boots is the shirt and tie peeking out from the bottom of the vest. I think he’d look longer and leaner if he just stood with the jacked hanging properly.

  • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

    Sadly, it appears as if Zach has not a fuck to give.

    • http://www.tomandlorenzo.com/ Tom and Lorenzo

      I don’t buy that for a second. A man does not choose to wear a plaid three-piece suit with a perfectly coordinated shirt and tie because he doesn’t give a fuck.

      • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

        He looks like someone else semi forced him to wear that fabulous, plaid three-piece suit, did all the coordinating for him, and he complied, but refused to bother with fit issues, decent shoes or a smile for the cameras. He’s the man version of Zosia Mamet. But more inherently adorable.

        • http://www.tomandlorenzo.com/ Tom and Lorenzo

          No one forced him to wear that suit. That’s silly. If he didn’t care, he would’ve worn a grey suit with a white shirt and a blue tie and called it a day.

          • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

            Pishaw. He’s married. You can’t envision his wife picking this out because she knows it is terrific and him bringing his bear man mentality to it?

            (meanwhile my stomach hurts a little because I feel like I’m arguing with you, but I am unable to not voice my opinion,)

          • http://www.tomandlorenzo.com/ Tom and Lorenzo

            Actually, I can’t picture that at all. It’s his movie premiere; not some cousin’s wedding. He’s clearly been styled.

            Honey, really. We’re disagreeing on a mild point. There’s no need for stomach issues.

          • http://www.facebook.com/people/Monzerrat-Ontiveros/100000216133922 Monzerrat Ontiveros

            Catfight!

      • http://www.snoskred.org/ Snoskred

        You think someone actually styled this, like this? If so, we need to find out who they are, and convene a fashion intervention, STAT. They need a 12 step program, or a week locked in a room with Tim Gunn, something, anything, that will help them to never do this again, to anyone, ever, anywhere.

        Because nobody should be telling people to wear shoes like that with a suit. I mean, those are work boots, like you’d wear to a construction site! Or perhaps, horse riding.

        For the sake of all, I sincerely hope that something happened to Zach’s shoes in the limo on the way over, and he stole these out of some construction workers truck because they were handy and happened to fit and at least he would have shoes instead of socks or bare feet.

        Or he was getting out of the car, and a police officer on a horse was standing there, and the horse accidentally pooped on his dress shoes, and the police officer felt so terrible he gave Zach his horse riding boots.

        Although most horse riding boots I have seen on police officers are Way more FIERCE than these, and they probably would have gone with the outfit. But maybe there was an unfortunate incident, and the police officer was wearing these shoes as a backup..

        Please let that – or something like that – be what happened. :) If not, I must now proceed to a corner and weep for humanity.

        • http://www.tomandlorenzo.com/ Tom and Lorenzo

          It’s a gorgeous suit with an inspired choice of shirt and tie. Yes, I think he had some help in putting this outfit together.

          Styled celebrity outfits constantly display fit issues or bad accessory choices, so there’s nothing new about that.

  • Girl_With_a_Pearl

    Guys, I agree with all your points about how Zach can look better, but he strikes me as one of those male celebs who just doesn’t give a fig when it comes to fashion.

    • http://www.tomandlorenzo.com/ Tom and Lorenzo

      Nothing about this outfit says “I don’t give a fig.”

      • MilaXX

        AMEN! That is not a cheap suit. The fact that he didn’t get it right, does not mean he doesn’t care.

        • Snailstsichr

          I love his color choices.

      • Girl_With_a_Pearl

        Oy! I’ve never been scolded by the Dads before. I rather enjoyed that.

    • Emily Giovanni

      He strikes me as a deliberately rumpled-looking celeb. Like he’s too cool for school.

  • mjude

    we know for sure he did not check himself in the mirror.

  • alyce1213

    The closeup shot, waist up, is adorable. No excuse for the lower half. None.

  • Kathy_Marlow

    He looks great in that shot of him from the waist up, waist down? not so much.

  • decormaven

    Sooo close. Better fit in the pant, proper shoe, and bam. Well-dressed man.

  • mmc2315

    Amen. The top half looks great.

  • nannypoo

    I think he’s adorable. He seems to be one of those people, like Zosia Mamet, whose schtick includes the concept that if you might not look great you should put on something nice but mess it up so you can’t be disappointed when you try but fail to look great. Brad Pitt is a different kind of slob. He could easily look great but he chooses to look like a hobo, maybe because he’s aging and can’t face the inevitable reactions he would get if he did a Clooney and just agreed to age with dignity and mature handsomeness. Zach’s behavior reminds me of a teacher I used to work with. She wrote elaborate lesson plans but never tried to teach them because she was afraid of failure.

    Fashion is just never going to work out for him.

    • Donna Tabor

      And more to the point, he doesn’t care if it does or not.

      I saw him on Jimmy Kimmel the other night, and he seems adorably unfazed by his celebrity.

    • MilaXX

      I think there is a huge difference between Zosia’s hipster too school for fashion look and Zach’s swing and a miss.

      • marlie

        Yes. Her “look” is contrived and intentional. I think he WANTS to look good here, and (maybe) doesn’t realize that he’s missed the mark.

    • conniemd

      He looks like a perfect straight guy candidate for the old Queer Eye show. He just looks in desperate need of fashion help.

    • Qitkat

      Re Brad Pitt. I’m puzzled as to what you mean by “can’t face the inevitable reactions he would get if he did a Clooney and just agreed to age with dignity and mature handsomeness.”

      As for Zach, I didn’t always understand his charms til recently, but I am totally heart-warmed by the 20 year friendship story. He seems like a real mensch.

      • nannypoo

        He does seem like a mensch. I like him a lot. Regarding Brad Pitt, what I mean is that he used to be pretty conventionally groomed but now that he’s getting older he’s buried in hair. George Clooney is neatly groomed with grey hair and smile lines around his eyes. Brad Pitt might look that way too if he shaved and cut his hair. In other words, his natural aging process would give him grey at the temples and smile lines and he would look 45 or however old he is, instead of this ageless biker look he has adopted. Give me Clooney any day.

        • Qitkat

          Oh, I love George Clooney, without reservations.

          Brad would look great if he styled himself even similar to GC. And I totally understand if he’s a much more casual guy, with six kids, he’s bound to be. There must be a happy medium though, if he desired it.

          It’s the “inevitable reactions” part I don’t understand. I suppose people would respond differently to him, because that’s what people do, but that’s not necessarily negative. Take for example, Prince Harry, if we ignore that he is a prince for a moment, he seems to be a man who can look good both casual, in uniform, and dressed for very high-end events. He *gets* how to present himself most times, leaving out the partying for this discussion. I’m sure a lot of that has to do with training. For the rest of us, it’s our personal decision (or a stylist’s).

  • In_Stitches

    As a man with disproportionately long legs, I feel very odd in classically cut dress pants. They come up so high…there’s no torso left! But, as T and Lo have illustrated, dress pants work a certain way and trying to change that just doesn’t work.

    • Donna Tabor

      I’m a woman with the same issue. You just have to obscure where your actual waist level is, to correct the proportions. A vest or jacket, or monochrome color scheme does the trick.

      • marlie

        Me three. I was in “low-rise” pants before they became a “thing.” ;)

      • In_Stitches

        I wear a lot of navy sweaters with jeans and blue chuck taylors…

  • MartyBellerMask

    I love the idea of suspenders. He’s such a cutie.

  • carnush

    He would look so adorable in a properly fitted suit. He’s adorable nonetheless, but poorly groomed and sloppy-looking.

  • Janet B

    Put on a pair of jeans and this works for me (at another venue).

  • marlie

    It’s so unfortunate that this looks so schlubby, because it has such potential. I love the plaid print, and the shirt and tie are a lovely contrast.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Monzerrat-Ontiveros/100000216133922 Monzerrat Ontiveros

    style-challenged guy LOL!

  • MilaXX

    oh Zach, so close. Listen to the the uncles, you won’t regret it.

  • formerlyAnon

    I am always unreasonably surprised by how charming I find him when he dresses up. I know a lot of people who went to school with him or know his family and they say he is a good guy.

    • RebeccaKW

      Have you seen the story about him finding out an old friend was homeless and him finding her and getting her an apartment, paying her rent? He takes her to movie premieres and stuff. If not, someone linked to a story about it above.

      I’ve always liked him, as a comedian, etc. But then to see how genuinely nice of a person he is makes me love him even more.

      • marlie

        “Emily Giovanni” posted a link to the story at the beginning of this post. So sweet!

  • barbarienne

    He looks like he should be teaching history to freshmen at some tiny liberal-arts college in the middle of nowhere.

    • formerlyAnon

      Which is part of his charm, for me.

      • barbarienne

        Yes, the larger picture in my head is he’s the professor all the students love, but the administration gets annoyed by because he’s often up in their grill supporting progressive issues; but since he played it cool long enough to get tenure, now there’s nothing they can do about it.

        • sweetlilvoice

          Sounds like a movie! I’d watch that….kind of like Dead Poet’s Society.

    • Qitkat

      I went to that college :)
      Very fond memories of some of the more rumpled professors. Ancient history, anthropology, German…

  • Denise Alden

    Wow. Thanks for posting that!

  • Gwyndall

    He’s in character. (we hope)

    • formerlyAnon

      I don’t think so. (Except insofar as he might have a character for his public appearances.)

      • Gwyndall

        I was being facetious. :)

  • http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=14301272 Kate Gorton

    I dunno…that could’ve been his goal. He’s a weird dude and maybe he enjoys his roundness :)

  • unbornfawn

    Have to agree with every word of TLo’s critique. I’ll add I appreciate that his beard is well groomed.

  • SugarSnap108

    Ugh, this could have been so snappy! It has COLOR and personality. Yeah, fit makes all the difference, don’t it?

    Oh, and shoes.

  • librarygrrl64

    “GUYS: DRESS PANTS ARE NOT JEANS. They are NOT supposed to fit the same way.”

    I want to have this tattooed somewhere.

  • e jerry powell

    I’m not comfortable with the coral shirt against the blue, but it’s not the worst part; that would be the shoes.

    But damn, he’s so effing cute…

  • http://gabyrippling.tumblr.com/ Gaby

    I got into a vicious fight with my ex (while we were dating) when I was trying to explain to him that his dress pants weren’t supposed to fit like jeans. He’s 6’2 and was wearing 34/34s (PLEATED and at the hips, so he got saddlebags), and his legs are actually longer than that but he was wearing his pants sagging around his hips (and of course when he hiked up his pants to his waist, it looks ridiculous because the pants were too short. Also, it’s nigh impossible to find 34/34s so you’d think he’d figure the fit out himself but… the menswear attendant at the store agreed with me that dress pants are worn at the waist and shared a weary look with me at my ex’s stubbornness; I don’t think he ended up buying any pants that day). I think guys do it because they think it camouflages a “gut” more than wearing the pants cutting across it, but it actually looks much worse.

    Ugh I get mad just thinking about that argument. We don’t speak anymore (so many fights) so I hope he’s found clothing that fits on his own.

  • Carina Green

    Your mistake might be in assuming he had “goals” when he put this on.

    • http://www.tomandlorenzo.com/ Tom and Lorenzo

      Not really.

  • MissusBee

    The thing that gives me the sad is that the thumbnail looks like Stan from Mad Men. It was all downhill from there frankly.

  • Louise Bryan

    Two words: Beau Brummel

  • Airkisses

    He looks like he’s playing Uncle Vernon in a remake of Harry Potter

    I don’t like the outfit, but I like that it’s something interesting to look at.

    Uncles T&Lo, thank you so much for Sausage Friday!!!!

    • demidaemon

      Uncle Vernon would never be close to this cute.

  • guest2visits

    Agree. Those are nice boots but they really brought a unique, natty suit down a notch. Trousers fit like baggy PJs.

  • DollyMadisonWI

    He’s a strange one.

  • Oscar Olalde

    Mr. Galifianakis take that thing off and come sit on my face ~ you are about to feel MUCH better ;) such a cute bear

  • calbear97

    Super story, thanks for sharing!