Milla Jovovich in Chanel at Cannes

Posted on May 21, 2013

We clapped and squealed with delight* at first sight of these pictures. “Something bold and graphic!” we cried. “Bold and graphic on the red carpet! Huzzah!”  We do so like when someone tries to be interesting, darlings. And besides, anything’s better than another fucking lace gown.

*exaggerated for dramatic effect


Milla Jovovich attends the premiere of ‘Blood Ties’ during the 66th Annual Cannes Film Festival in a Chanel couture gown paired with Swarovski jewelry.

Chanel Spring 2013 Couture Collection/Model: Aymeline Valade (WOMEN)

But we don’t know, you guys. It kinda looks like wallpaper. And it’s the second dress today that looks like an undershirt paired with a strapless gown. And we’re weirdly focused on the lack of belt, as if that thin red strip of leather in the runway shot somehow radically alters the look – but it kinda does, right? And yikes-on-toast, is her hair and makeup scary-awful. And boy-howdy, do we sound cranky right now. And land-o-goshen, we should probably shut up.

What we’re trying to say here is, we thought we liked it and then it turned out we didn’t and now our disappointment has made us cranky.



[Photo Credit: Getty,]

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  • Totally agree. I love a floral print and this whole look makes me cranky.

    • drdarke

      Anybody remember that second-season CASTLE episode where Beckett went undercover as Castle’s Russian trophy girlfriend? That’s what the hair and makeup remind me of – except Stana Katic at least showed off her legs, which we’re not getting here.

      That’s what it is – Russian Trophy Wife head atop that floral-print gown…which I have to admit I kind of like…..

  • I love it.

    • Agreed. Interesting yet simple.

    • maggiemaybe

      I think it’s fantastic too. Totally mod.

    • homofascist

      Me too. The t-shirt effect just isn’t the same as the Valentino gown.

      • ballerinawithagun

        This T has sequins on it and works much better with this mod print. She has the attitude for it. And speaking of attitude, I like the Chrissie Hynde hair and make-up. Expect the unexpected from Milla.

    • Yup. Unreserved love.

    • And she is working the fuck out of it. I love how she looks when she turns the attitude on!

      • demidaemon

        I’m with you guys. Sorry, TLo. 🙂

  • aeb1986

    I could have done without the white on top, it really does look like an undershirt. And I think it would have made it a little sexier to see her shoulders. But I love the print on that dress, I think its fun

    • AndresB

      There is no print – this is all-over sequins embroidery.
      And for the fact that it’s all-over sequins embroidery and still looks like a rather too bold and unimaginative print, it can make you cranky indeed.
      The same pattern in a hazy print, off-the shoulder without that white sequins t-shirt, with an updo and with one tenth of eye make up – then we’d have a deal.

  • Mismarker


  • eowyn_of_rohan

    That eye makeup. Oh dear. She looks like she was blasted in the face with coal residue.

  • Yeah, it looks like a t-shirt with a strapless dress. She could have done something different with her hair, but I like her make up.

  • Grandma’s dress.

  • gabbilevy

    Don’t hate the deployment of the white undershirt from the front, but it doesn’t work as well from the back. And somehow, I think you’re right about that belt… I really wanted to love this.

  • eljay

    mila is trying her damnedest to make it work. she almost convinced me that the dress is fine.

    • Snailstsichr

      Gotta admire her for selling that dress. She’s doing her part even if the dress falls a little short. We could all make a list of stars who could stand to be schooled by Ms Milla.

  • Show me my seat on the Cranky Express. I’m right with you.

  • Julia Dunne

    Agree. Initial impact is kinda cool. It is indeed nice to see something unexpected. But if one takes too long a gander, the overall look falls apart, and falls apart fast. The t-shirt top catches the eye, but then it’s, well, a t-shirt top. On a gown. Weird. Have no strong feelings either way about the belt. The makeup is ghastly. Walking Dead. And she doesn’t need to do that, ya know? Oh well. Props to her for rockin’ something that isn’t like everything else.

  • Janet B

    This is so much better than Zoe’s dress.
    I like this dress a lot, too bad she went with her version of crazy to mimic the model.

  • Diego!

    I’m sorry but I disagre with you guys.

    She looks STUNNING!!! You WERQ that dress you Zombie Killer + Resident Evil Star! 😀

  • copper

    I’m in two minds about the belt — on one hand, it definitely looks better with the belt but on the other hand, does having a belt cheapen it somehow? Like transforming it from ‘gown’ to ‘pretty dress’? Of course, it probably wouldn’t have mattered if the dress itself seemed more expensive (i.e. non-wallpaper printy over a white shirt) and if her make-up and hair wasn’t out of the seventies…

  • mmc2315

    I did not even recognize her with that hair & make-up!

  • zenobar

    And dagnab it, she seems to be turning into Chrissie Hynde. (which is not a bad thing; I just wanted to say “dagnab it”)

    • eowyn_of_rohan

      Holy crap, she is Chrissie Hynde! How did that happen?

      • Well, she used to be Linda Evangelista, so her repetoire is growing!

    • ballerinawithagun

      Didn’t see your post first, she looks great working the Chrissie Hynde.

  • Nope, she has me, I love it. I love the super dark hair and the ridiculous amount of eye makeup, and I don’t even know why. I don’t miss the belt because it gives her such a clean, long and lean line. I even like how the white shoulders takes me back to sundresses, t-shirts and Docs. Bring that Mad Love shit on Miss Milla.

    • Me too. I think she looks amazing.

  • In the tune of “You Can Fly” from Peter Pan: Needs a belt needs a belt needs a Beeeeelt!

    That said, I love the print and the shoes make my head hurt.

  • I don’t mind the white t-shirt affect. If looks crisp, fresh and pretty. I really like it, and I liked Zoe’s, too. Milla is also selling the hell out of this look. A WERQ for me.

  • pattyw

    I thought the same thing — that tiny slip of a red belt totally makes the look. Hair and makeup are giving her a love-child of Lara Flynn Boyle and Carla Bruni vibe.

  • Zeeshan Ali

    Because there so much white in the print, the white shoulders don’t look as much out of place at they did in Zoe’s dress. However the hair and makeup (I guess she wanted to go for the runway look), I agree with TLo, look terrible. Also the omission of the slim red belt just makes the dress look like a bed sheet.

  • appliquer

    LOL, TLo. I immediately thought she needed the red belt as well.

  • I kind of love it, especially the slight sheen on the black threads. Except I can’t stand that silly T-shirt top. Why do that to a dress that doesn’t need any extra design elements?

  • elemspbee

    oh dear. what a disappointment. She’s so hot and fierce. Hair and face awful. And indeed another gown over white tshirt. Belt perhaps would have made some difference. Not sure, since styling is horrific.

  • zenobar

    Unfortunately my brain keeps telling me that each one of those red dots is actually a tiny pompom. Like hundreds of tiny clown noses. If you stood Miley Cyrus in that terrifying jumpsuit next to this…oh. God. I think I heard the Judgement Day trumpet just thinking about it.

  • Donna Tabor

    The dress reminds me of when my daughters would play dress-up with my old gowns, and they’d wear them over their other clothes.

    That eye makeup is freaky, almost as crazy as the model’s.

  • crash1212

    I feel your pain. This is in dire need of the red belt, and better hair, and not so crazy make-up. Now I’m cranky, too.

  • jw_ny

    I do like the dress…just don’t like the overall look. Her hair…those bangs…they just weigh her down and enclose her face, and then adding all that dark eye makeup in which blends into the bangs…too dark and heavy. A lighter and fresher look with the dress would have been much better. The gold soled stripper shoes are kinda cheesy.

  • SugarSnap108

    You’re absolutely right about the belt. My first thought on seeing the model, “WHY did she ditch the belt?” I do still like the dress, though — apparently strapless dresses over t-shirts don’t bother me. But yikes! on those awful bangs and heavy eye makeup.

  • Kristobel

    I like it, but it definitely needed that red belt – it is amazing how much it changes the dress. Her head needs a do-over.

  • BrooklynBomber

    No, no, take heart. It’s fabulous. Picture it w/o the white and you have (again, as w/ Saldana’s) just another gown. Yes, one in a print, huzzah, indeed, but a same-ol’ same ol’ silhouette. The t shirt effect is good. Don’t worry, be happy! It’s printy! It’s summery! It’s 1964y!

  • Love the ENTIRE look… Hair and makeup beautiful!

  • claudemtl777

    Yes, it looks like an undershirt, and, call me crazy, but I dig it…(On the freida pinto look, the white undershirt part didnt look like it belonged, whereas here, i think it does…)This could have been a “Yea or Nay”, and I’d be all “YEA!”

  • MoHub

    First reaction was how much that skinny little belt does and how much I missed it.

  • me too, TLo, me too. /:

  • I unequivocally love it.

  • carnush

    I love it. Milla can do anything.

  • random_poster

    It’s an ironic, fickle dress. Do I like it? Do I hate it? I like it. I hate it. I like it!

    I like it on Mila. She’s striking and totally pulling it off.

  • She’s working it and the dress is very chic, but the Swarovski ain’t helping and she went to cray-town with the eyes and hair. Still, her PhD posing almost cancels out the negatives. Milla is one gal who always knows how to look skinny.

  • Dan_In_NYC

    I was all ready to get mad at you for liking this when it has the same undershirt-y feeling as Zoe’s. But of course, I happily scrolled down to see you pointed that out. TLo-Noticing-All-The-Fashion-Details .org 🙂 I love the dress but agree that somehow that little belt takes it to a whole other place that it desperately needs to go.

  • Little_Olive

    Save same bitching for the heinous shoes, TLo!

  • If it didn’t have the white top, it would have been a lot prettier. And my initial reaction was “She should have kept the belt,” so you’re not off there either.

  • Qitkat

    The sequin factories in some third-world country where they employ tiny people for their tiny fingers, must all be working overtime. Oh wait, no overtime pay for garment factory workers. Or enough fire exits. Or safety codes. Or structural inspections.

  • mjude

    i do like the print

  • AmeliaEve

    First they came with the illusion netting inserts, and I said nothing, for I was not wearing illusion netting. Then they came with the surgical white cotton inserts, and I tried to keep my opinions to myself, but I just can’t. This trend is hella ugly.

  • Pennymac

    Why, why, why with the undershirt? I put my finger over it and squinted, its way better that way. I join you in your disappointment!

  • nannypoo

    If you get rid of the undershirt and just go with the off-the-shoulder result it would be a great gown. Her hair looks like she got caught in the rain, though. Something should be done about that. And yes, it needs the belt.

  • Cathy S

    I love the print. Love the gown. It might look better at dress length though. I give it a thumb’s up anyway.

  • I like this. All-over-sequins mimicking print? Count me in. Dramatic and bold.

  • ashtangajunkie

    She has the looks to pull off heavy makeup, but this is on the crazy side. I have no words for that hair. Love the dress – prefer it with the belt, but it’s a great look for her regardless. Shame about whatever happened above the neck though – she’s such a beauty.

  • pattycap11

    it does look like wallpaper but i kinda like that about it

  • tereliz

    I dig the wallpaper aesthetic.

    What I’m not loving is how it the fabric folds over on the bodice in a way that reminds me of the dresses I wore to middle school dances. Not a time I want to sartorially revisit. The white looks unfinished and the belt really helps break up the runway look in a way that helps the white look slightly more cohesive. Wish she’d kept it. Hair and makeup don’t go together or with this dress.

  • I love it! Fresh and different. Really, do we want to encourage more black dresses with sheer cutouts? Give her positiver reinforcement!!

  • OneBonBonIsPoison

    Again with the frum couture! That white bit has got to go.

  • NDC_IPCentral

    Thank you, Tom, for “boy howdy.” It has been missing from my lexicon of exclamations, and it is returning forthwith, with vigor.

    And this is not being posted ironically. I mean this with utmost sincerity. I’m regularly being told by around me that I have a colorful way of speech, and this will be a pop of color that will blast the inattention-wax outta listeners’ ears.

  • SewingSiren

    Very elegant. Especially nice for daytime red carpet.

  • GTrain

    the dress is an interesting choice but ugh to that hair and make-up.

  • IMNAngryLiberal

    I think that without the white Hanes and with a red belt, this would still look fab. As it is, it’s kind of awful — and I’m not just saying that because of my husband’s obsessive love for Ms. Jovovich!

  • capybara_cafe

    I loved it until I kept scrolling and realized it was full length. I’d love it at knee length. And you’re right, the belt makes all the difference.

  • I still love it. I like how the design gets ever so slightly larger as one goes down the dress and I can’t believe it’s BEADED! (I think I’m right about that). Love. Kudos.

  • I love this. LOVE. Sure, it’s dramatic and over the top, but it’s Milla Jovovich! I think her hair and makeup actually look great (though the eye is a tad too heavy), and I really like the dress. The “undershirt” part doesn’t bother me like it did on Zoe Saldana.

  • jmorino08

    I kind of love the dress even with the t-shirt effect and no belt (although it would have been better with the belt). But totally agree about the hair and makeup. She is one of the most beautiful women in the world. Whoever effed her head up that bad should be fired!

  • flamingoNW

    Agree, much better with the belt. And that make-up is ridiculous!

  • filmcricket

    I didn’t mind La Saldana’s (and I am someone who Officially Does Not Get It about her) but this is … yeah. Very t-shirt-y. A lot of that collection was, as I recall. Exceedingly 90s all over.

    And that make-up is heinous.

  • alyce1213

    What a shame, it would be beautiful as an off-the-shoulder dress without the T-shirt thing.
    I don’t like the bangs — too heavy with the makeup.

  • ChristySchiff

    She definitely needed that belt. And that sure looks like yesterday’s make-up to me, but then I have more experience with “slept in” make-up than “red carpet-ready”. Still, I love that dress, and she looks like she knows I do.

  • erinbinek

    Love her, love the dress, love the hair and makeup. Only quibble is that she should have kept the belt.

  • trisker

    You guys are being hilarious today!

  • Gloriana Reginata

    This is a little less undershirty than Zoe’s, and I like the squared-off look the sleeves present at the back. But how much more wonderful it would have been if they’d done a fade from the patterned beading into the white, carrying a few hints of black up closer to the neck.

  • MilaXX

    I actually like the crazy hair and makeup because it calls to mind the runway look, but I think the red belt is needed.

  • It’d look dowdy on anybody else, but Milla Jovovich can WERK any garment!

  • Interesting the gown but the hair and make up make her look like she JUST remembered that she had somewhere to be while on her way home from the bar.

  • j_anson

    I actually like this dress a fair amount (though agreed that the belt helped). But the hair and makeup is just crazy! Crazy-bad.

  • Judy_S

    I did not see an undershirt on Zoe. Here I see it.

  • deathandthestrawberry

    She looks like a young Linda Gray. It’s the hair, right?

  • she. is. KILLING IT. brava, girlcrush, brava.

    • MissAmynae

      Milla can do nearly no wrong in my book.

  • conniemd

    Wow, that print really is made up out of embroidered beading. Stunning.

  • Eric Stott

    Looks as if she tried the dress on over a shirt- you’re right on that.

  • I adored this Chanel Haute Couture look I mean those sequins are LAYED but for feck sake why couldn’t Chanel loan her their jewelry? What?! Every shot caller in China has it on reserve for their mistress(es)

  • titaness25

    When I first saw it, I thought it was one of those duct tape dresses that all the youth seemed to love back in the day. The closeups have done little to relieve me of that notion.

  • But her stance. Her stance (not pose) is on POINT! She’s standing like a slow blink. Like a Grand Dame. I love it and the dress (especially without the belt) makes it a long uninterrupted gently curved line.

  • Aurumgirl


  • MaryAtRealityTea

    Definitely needs the belt. It just falls flat without it.

  • kimiakay

    This is a striking dress, she is a striking woman. They do not go together. I am sorry about that. I do like the dress, except for some quibbles, the belt being one of them. The model makes the dress seem so different from what Milla is wearing. Milla’s hair isn’t right, but I don’t know how to make it work. Her eye makeup isn’t smudged, but it looks like it will be soon. And no lip color, to speak of.

  • MissAmynae

    THIS is more like what Jessica Pare should shoot for. Interesting prints, clean lines, tousled hair.

  • guest2visits

    I don’t like the dress all that much, but she’s wearing about as good as it could be…. except maybe for Florence Welch.

  • TheAmericaness

    Her hair is 80’s awful after a swim and some time to dry.

  • PeaceBang

    me too. exactly.

  • bd73

    i agree. the red belt makes the look. it defines the shape.

  • ankali

    Love the gown, tolerate the accessories, hate the hair and makeup.

  • CommentsByKatie

    Ugh, is the 80’s coming back? This reminds me of Taylor Swift’s bright blue beaded dress. Beads/sequins only belong on dark or simple dresses…bright color and graphic sequins heads straight to tackyland! This could be vintage Laurence Kazar.

  • I do so hope the hair is for a movie (doesn’t explain the makeup though) because this color does absolutely nothing for her and the nude lip is awful. I do like the dress and love her in it. Just can’t with the hair and makeup.

  • I like it.

  • Renaissance_Man_ATL

    I love the whole look! Home run!