James Franco in Gucci at Cannes

Posted on May 24, 2013

It’s really not fair; we admit that. Because he clearly put some sort of effort in. And while nothing here is exactly setting us on fire with its stylishness, it’s acceptable and should protect him from too much red carpet bitchery.

But we can’t help it…

James Franco attends ‘As I Lay Dying’ photocall during the 66th Annual Cannes Film Festival in Gucci.

He looks dirty.

And not in the “hot n’ sexy” way, but in the “smellin’ ripe” one. We always think he’s one of those guys whose crotch scent enters a room before they do. Is that fair of us? Maybe not, but if he’d shaved and didn’t have such crunchy-looking hair, we probably wouldn’t have jumped right to the conclusion that he needs the full Silkwood at the moment.

Besides, the outfit is, as we said, acceptable, but it’s just so boring. Our minds can’t help but wander.



[Photo Credit: Getty, PacificCoastNews]

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  • Yeah, he totally skeeves me out.

    And now I have to go throw up at the thought of the smell of someone’s crotch entering a room before they do. Shouldn’t have had tuna for lunch….

    • Jus’ gonna say it. if you can’t grow a decent beard, then DON’T GROW one at ALL. It just looks half assed and skeezey.

  • I had a flash of clarity today. I found James Franco attractive because he resembles Rodrigo Santoro. But he really is no Rodrigo Santoro and those sunglasses are douchey.

    • iheartbuffy


    • JasmineAM

      I feel like a fan girl right now, but how are sunglasses douchey when it looks like its super bright outside?

      • Not the fact that he’s wearing them – it’s a good idea. Just the choice he made of the gold mirror aviators.

  • formerlyAnon

    You guys have officially skeeved me out with your imagery. Well done, but I wish you hadn’t.

    I don’t think he looks any dirtier than any of the rest of ’em that use that awful hair product that gives them crispy yet wet-look hair and treat shaving as something done to maintain the proper degree of stubble.

    • Qitkat

      Dit. To. on all your comments. I’m too speechless to say anything about Mr. Franco.

    • Allison Drury

      His beard looks like he got slammed in the face with a chewing tobacco pie. It makes me want to hurl.

  • gabbilevy

    Not just you.

    ETA: Ok, so far Sausage Friday has been the gross, greasy kind of sausage. Where’s the tasty stuff?

    • homofascist


    • aeb1986

      I could really go for some nice lean turkey sausage right about now.

    • Jessica Freeman

      Not all sausage does a body good. Last week it was the home grown, organic, freshly washed sausage. This week, we’re having the greasy, cooked last week and reheated today, Sanitation Grade D level sausage.

    • procrastinatrice

      Please. I can’t tolerate Josh Holloway being called gross and greasy. The guy’s charm gives me life.

      • gabbilevy

        But even he had one button too many undone 🙁

        • procrastinatrice

          well, one less for me to undo:P

        • marlie

          Josh’s button is easily fixable. This guy is just… UGH. EW. Franco looks skeevy. Josh Holloway doesn’t (to me, anyway).

    • TheAmericaness

      I know, right? Doesn’t Gary Oldman make any public appearances? Or Damien Lewis? I mean, I suppose they could be stinky too, but one wouldn’t mind having to discuss them in length to figure it out, no?

    • Little_Olive

      Seriously, if Johnny Depp comes in next I’ll have a massive stroke.

      Quickly, some John Hamm to stabilize our levels, please.

      • demidaemon

        The Depp is clean now, supposedly. I await photographic evidence, though.

  • DeborahJozayt

    Ripe with disappointment, this Sausage Friday is.

  • homofascist

    You say crotch scent like it is a bad thing! 🙂

    • jw_ny

      I wish this site had emoticons…I’d be posting a roflmao one…thanks for the laugh!

    • moonrabbit120

      sorry this is off topic, but I just had to say what a surprise it is to see the spider that I made is your avatar.

      • homofascist


        • moonrabbit120

          huh, maybe its a computer glitch. On my computer it is showing your avatar as a needle felted spider that I made and have for sale online.

  • Griffinqueen

    *Sigh* When will the scruffy beard trend die?

  • siriuslover

    I love me some James Franco, but that facial hair is beyond annoying. I can’t wait for “As I Lay Dying” to open though. If anyone can make that story work on film, it’d be James Franco (and I’m sure plenty of people are going to contradict me now!).

  • jw_ny

    He looked like he bathed for the GQ spread…posted a few days ago. Probably hasn’t since that spread was shot tho…lol. Clothing wise…the tie and shirt collar just aren’t working for me. A bit of color would have helped. The mirrored sunglasses are kinda cheesy too…especially for a photo shoot.

  • hunt3002

    I can confirm from his time at an elite institution that he just doesn’t look dirty–he is dirty. Not a fan.

    • Mismarker

      He strikes me as the type of person who, despite time spent at an elite institution, clearly cannot read and/or follow the directions on a shampoo bottle.

      • hunt3002

        You would be correct dear internet person. That’s what his assistants are for.

  • DiverK

    He needs a shave/beard trimming and he needs to keep his hands out of his pockets!

  • MilaXX

    It’s the combo of too much hair product & a scruffy beard compounding on his natural douchiness.

  • marlie

    His facial hair looks disgusting. Otherwise, the look is insanely boring.

  • Jennifer

    I just want to roll my eyes every time his name comes up.


  • Doug Orlyk

    I continue to have huge issues with the yellow teeth, too. The scruff is gross, yes, and the sunglasses are douchey, but those teeth. He can certainly afford bleaching or veneers.

  • formerlyAnon

    I dissent from the disappointment in today’s featured males. The parade passes by in its infinite variety, and I enjoy even if my own preferences in male personal pulchritude and plumage don’t always appear. I admit that the females are given the chance to display more variety but I get tired of ’em.

    • jw_ny

      As with many message boards, I suspect many derive as much pleasure in expressing their disappointments as with their satisfactions…if not more. Or is it just me…lol. 😉

      • formerlyAnon

        Oh, I certainly do more complaining than admiring myself. But I just had to register disagreement with the idea a few expressed that “Sausage Friday” is having a run of substandard sausage so far today.

        • Eric Stott

          More like a Slim Jim Meat Stick in quality this time around.

          • decormaven

            More like Pup-Peroni.

          • Eric Stott

            More like something from a gas station

  • Jessica Freeman

    He was doing ok (for James Franco) until we got to the mirrored aviators. Then the douche alarm went off again.

  • acevedob

    I completely disagree. Beard bias!

    • Eric Stott

      That’s not a beard, that’s just a failure to shave.

      • Little_Olive

        So true. Gilletically challenged.

  • Tr16ia

    Is a belt an optional thing these days? Because if it is, I don’t like these days. #old

  • Dancer

    BWAHAHAHAAAAAA!!! @ We always think he’s one of those guys whose crotch scent enters a room before they do

  • conniemd

    I have an irrational dislike of James Franco. He reminds me of the guy in the office who tries to hard, brown noses, takes credit for your work and is always annoyingly hanging around.

    • sekushinonyanko

      Hey! Bob Benson is very clean!

    • demidaemon

      Reminds me of someone I knew in college. It is part of the reason why I have an immediate, irrational dislike of anyone named Bob. Apologies and no offense to any wonderful Bobs out there. It’s my personal hang-up.

  • ThaliaMenninger

    The word douchenozzle was invented just for him.

  • Eric Stott

    Fine from the neck down- but DOUCHE HEAD!

  • Judy_S

    I don’t, uh, smell the yuckiness, but I hate those sunglasses.

  • flamingoNW

    I’ve heard from sources that you’re not far off base….

  • iheartbuffy

    On top of the sleaziness, those sunglasses are a huge mishap for him. He looks like a Guido.

  • StellaZafella

    I don’t WANT to dislike James Franco…it’s not like James Franco is trying to be unlikeable…it’s just…somehow…when I think of James Franco…I see Ed Wood. (((shudder)))

  • YoungSally

    My thoughts exactly — at the risk of annoying some Pattinfans — he’s veering dangerously into Twilight territory — with just enough Terry Anderson to make it really gross.

  • algaechick

    At some point he’s going to have to admit (at least I hope he does, the power of delusion is strong with this one) that he’s one of those people that, no matter how much time and work is put in, his beard is never going to look full and luscious. It’s only upping the dirty appearance quotient.

  • cute guy, boring suit. leenabelle agrees.

  • librarygrrl64

    Grooming, Franco. Find out about it.

  • nannypoo

    If I were a man I would not want to admit that I couldn’t grow a better beard than this one.

  • AnniNoone

    He needs some womenfolk to make sure he don’t go out lookin’ like that. (I’m sorry, I’m not getting out my Faulkner for the exact quote.)

  • Chuck Barthelme

    Ah, blue on blue, the exciting version of gray on gray. If he’d given a pop of color on the tie or something I might not have noticed the disgustingness that is his facial hair. Unshaven isn’t for everyone, bro. Take a razor to that face.

  • Neckbeard needs shaving, the beard in general needs conditioning (looks very pubey) and the hair needs a wash and trim and maybe a quarter of the product he’s using.
    Also, stop smoking jays in your trailer if you can’t cover up the evidence. You just know Cate and Tilda have a toke once in a while but it never shows.

  • I think he’s hot. Nothing is less sexy than a man who primps for hours.

    • Little_Olive

      Honey, there is a nice middle ground. Also, this guy clearly *has* primped. Just not the right way.

      Even is what is going on in his hair were effectively grease and dirt, leaving it unwashed to cause that effect is a major act of vanity.

  • NOLA_gal

    EW. Crotch scent.

  • Carina Green

    He looks like he smells like scalp.

  • How can one guy always look like he needs a shower, no matter what he’s wearing?

  • elemspbee


  • demidaemon

    Crotch scent…I don’t think I’ll recover from that one.

    It is funny that TLo brought this up though, because I felt that he looks particularly clean here. For him, at least. I do despair at the thought of him, Ke$ha and Courtney Love in the same room together.

  • GTrain

    I’ll admit, in spite of a lot of the doucheyness I have a soft spot for him. I think his suit looks nice but yeah, he’s looking a little ripe at the same time.

  • Buffy

    “the full Silkwood” ha! The sunglasses also add to the effect

  • kimiakay

    Clearly Mr. Franco ran his hand through Mr. Cooper’s hair, and used whatever came off in his own hair. Right?

  • Citagaze

    He’s a total Tom “I just want my kids back” Jane.

  • Puckndc


  • BigWhiteGrannyPanties

    Wash your hair. But at least there’s no neck beard.

  • PeaceBang

    He is so gross. And the teeth look mossy, to boot.

  • lobsterlen

    Honestly before I read your comment I thought, “Another actor with hygiene issues like Marilyn Monroe.”

  • Imasewsure

    Don’t care too much about the dirty or skeevy but the boring is getting…boring….

  • abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxqyz

    he looks like a drug addict.

  • shorty j

    I absolutely cannot stand his smugness and don’t under normal circumstances find him remotely attractive, but if he had shaved and WASHED HIS DAMN HAIR, I’d be swooning right now.

  • NYCGlamourpuss

    Gah… he still looks stinky! If he’d just not have that greasy looking bedhead, I could give this a total “Boy WERQ”. But I can’t! There has to be soap involved!