Giuseppe Zanotti Fall 2013 Shoes

Posted on May 23, 2013

Darlings, these shoes are so glam and fab that we’re feeling the need for another round of PRETEND STYLIST!

The rules are simple: scroll down and yell out the name of the first celebrity that comes to mind with each shoe.

Alternate rules: Try and guess our choices before reading them. Fun for the whole bitchy family!

Ready? GO:




Julianne Moore












Chloe Moretz



Gwyneth Paltrow




Kristen Stewart




Selena Gomez




Anne Hathaway




Nicole Kidman




Michelle Williams



Emma Stone





Cameron Diaz





Mindy Kaling





Kiernan Shipka




Sarah Jessica Parker






Zoe Saldana





J Lo


Wonder Woman



[Photo Credit:]

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  • Funkykatt

    I like Zoe’s shoes the best.

  • Kenisha Hill Phillips

    I think the last pair would be too much on Lynda Carter. 🙂

    • sagecreek

      True, but I bet Lea M is buying a pair as we speak.

      • Kenisha Hill Phillips

        Of cpurse

      • Tom Shea

        Adrienne Palicki wanted a pair, too. She was all “You GUYS! Come ON!!! I was CLOSE!!!!”

  • AlisonS

    I think I would switch Kristen and Selena.

  • crash1212

    Totally diggin’ the Kiernan Shipka boots.

    • JasmineAM

      I would really love them if they were a different print.

  • Susan Lucci!

    Lady Gaga!

    Lindsay “ankle monitor” Lohan

    Pipi Longstocking

    Someone with bad taste from the 80’s

    Someone with bad taste from the 90’s


    Heidi “tight & Shiny” Klum


    Khloe Khardashian

    J Lo

    Victoria Beckhan


    Helen Fucking Mirren


    Nicki Minaj

    Chloe Sevigny


    Paula Abdul

    • alyce1213

      Lindsay “ankle monitor” Lohan — made me laugh and squeal. Great!

    • sojourneryouth

      I love you so hard right now! Honestly, so many of these are tacky to me, and so, so, so uncomfortable looking. I basically guessed “tasteless wench who hates the concept of having feet” for every one!

  • sagecreek

    Love the Chloe Moretzes! (How does one pluralize Moretz, anyway?)

    • alyce1213

      Great question — if you go to the Hebrew language, where kibbutz is pluralized kibbutzim, it would be Moretzim.

      • sagecreek

        Okay, you win the internets today 🙂

  • marlie

    My favorites are the Julianne Moore shoes. I scrolled down the list and kept saying “But what about JLo? Don’t forget JLo!!” I should have known… TLo know what they’re doing. 🙂

    • LauraWL

      I thought J. Lo for most of them too!

      • louised

        Glad it wasn’t just me. My reaction as I scrolled down was pretty much “J Lo, J Lo, J Lo, J Lo, and J Lo.”

  • Man, I can never play this game… I just want to yell “me! me! ME!”

  • warontara

    Don’t hate me but…I really like the last pair. Perfect for a fun night out on the town (with a simple dress). Lol but then, my style generally skews towards drag queen.

  • Breatheinthegood

    I shouted out “Katy Perry!” for the last one- which I guess is really really close to Wonder Woman. They’re pretty much doppelgangers.

  • dixie murphy ross

    I WANT those Wonder Woman shoes to go with my WW tutu!

  • Daisy Walker

    I can’t imagine any of those super high heels being comfortable, but they sure are purty to look at.

    • IMNAngryLiberal

      My thoughts exactly….I especially like the boots (not the open-toed ones, of course), and I can only think how my poor feet would hurt if I wore them. Maybe I could get that white pair and just sit them on my mantle…hmmm?

      • Daisy Walker

        Yes, I see so many shoes that I could never wear, but would just like to gaze at longingly. Also, they cost as much as an art piece–why take the chance of wearing them in public? Just leave them on the mantle in a spotlight.

        • This is what I’m actually doing with my (one and only) pair of real expensive Marc Jacobs-Shoes: I keep them in a shelf and admire them every day… I wear them maybe once a year.

          • Daisy Walker

            That sounds lovely!

  • Sarah Thomas

    For those last shoes, the correct answer is “Sarah Thomas.” Please have them couriered over in recompense.

  • MilaXX

    My list:
    1. Julianne Moore
    2. Solange
    3. Rhianna
    4. Katy Perry
    5.Lucy Lui
    6. Kerry Washington
    7.Selena Gomez
    8. Madonna
    9. Nicole Kidman
    10. Michelle Williams
    11. Emma Stone
    12. Cate Blanchet
    13. Mindy Kaling
    14. Chole or one of her alters
    15. SJP
    16. Beyonce
    17. Zoe Saldana
    18. JLo
    19. Eve

  • carnush

    Amazing. So sexy.

  • HomeOfficeGirl

    I see Eva Longoria in the first with the fuzzy fur. I’d like to see a paparazzi pic of Kim K in #3… since she’s so hell bent on being uncomfortable in her pregnancy, let’s give her something to cry about!!

  • Tatiana Luján

    1 Rihanna
    2. Julianne Moore
    3 Charlize Theron
    4 Dakota Fanning
    5 Lea Michelle
    6 Carrie Underwood
    7 Ginnifer Goodwing
    8 Cate Blanchett
    9 Emma Watson
    10 Jennifer Morrison. And she would wear them with a gown.
    11 Solange
    12 Tilda
    13 Kate Beckinsale
    14 Eva Mendes
    15 Blake Lively
    16 Beyonce
    17 Olivia Wilde
    18 Rachel Zoe
    19 Katy Perry/ Miley Cyrus

    • Can we…number the pictures?….

  • Perditax

    The only pair I guessed right were Wonder Woman’s (which are pretty fab). Some nice shoes but some were high enough to make me wince just looking at them!

  • golden_valley

    Wonder Woman! I woke my dog when I burst out laughing at that.

  • shawnhunter

    I got the Kiernan Shipka one and I kept yelling out J LO for half of these figuring one of them had to be hers…

  • Uncles Dearest, shame on you for omitting the NSFW label, this is SHOE PORN! I love it!

  • me, me, me, not me, me x 8, so not me, no really, stop it – that’s fug, no and quit it, maybe, ha!

  • I’m retraining as a podiatrist and moving to LA. Those things are lethal!

  • Is it cheating if I said J Lo for every shoe because I knew I’d be right for one of them?

  • Jessi03

    Wonder Woman!

  • Judy_J

    I think Gwenneth Paltrow would wear the Kristen Stewart shoe. And Wonder Woman would rock those red/gold star pumps, but only for a formal occasion. Those are not shoes to wear while chasing down bad guys.

  • tereliz

    Wonder Woman *gasps* I would never wear those but love them and want them anyway. Love you, uncles!

  • Instead of Solange for that hoof like shoe I chose Chloe Sevigny.

  • Sally Brownson

    I want the “Emma Stone” boots. I actually had those picked out for J. Lo, but then, I had nearly all of these picked out for J. Lo.

  • theblondette

    Those heels! The pain, the pain. Girls, you know that nauseated feeling you get because the arch of your foot aches so badly from the high heels you’ve unwisely worn for too long? I feel that looking at some of these.

  • Alanna Wisteria

    Did y’all do this just for the Wonder Woman punchline at the end? If so, then well-played.

  • hughman

    The entire cast of “Kinky Boots”. Done.

  • guest2visits

    I want to be hot and sexy enough to wear JLo’s sparkly boots for day, and Julianne Moore’s mink heels for evening.
    So who’s designing a line of magic-wands this season…?

  • titaness25

    I kept shouting Beyonce, thinking I was bound to be right eventually.

    • Shell

      Omg- me too! I was starting to lose hope until the leopard print shoes showed up! Those screamed beyonce!

  • I cheated – I said J Lo for all of them (except the short heeled one).

  • Whoo hoo! I got two, Gwyneth and JLo. To be fair, I guessed JLo for like, six of ’em.

    • AlisonS

      Me too! Then I read TLo’s suggestion & was like “Fine that works too.”

  • PeaceBang

    I hate most of them. *crankyface*

  • Qitkat

    The *Kiernan Shipka* is pretty cute. As for most of the rest of them, women may as well all start learning to dance “en pointe” because clearly that’s where the height of heels is headed.

  • NAILED all of the celeb associations. Mind. Blown.

  • Got a Total score of 1.5
    The Gwyneth, and then a .5 for yelling Beyonce instead of Solange. DNA testing should give me 1/2 a point, right!??
    I.Want. Them. All.
    Especially the furry and the Swarovski . Oh. Oh. Oh.

  • H2olovngrl

    Woohoo! I got one right! Kiernan Shipkaà

  • I have no idea who Mindy Kaling or Kiernan Shipka are, and I’m quite alright with that.

  • sweet_potato

    Numbers 1-19, me.

  • Jennifer

    Really rather surprised Miley wasn’t on the list.

  • ballerinawithagun

    Emma Stone in every color!

    Can I wear the wonder Woman for July 4th??? Please?

  • PinkySlinky

    only got one right- Sarah J. Parker…

  • last one made me laugh! i don’t see the nicole kidman one though….zebra print?

  • The last pair looks like the Chinese flag, BUT the rest are fab.