RuPaul’s Drag Race: SHUT UP, ROXXXY

Posted on April 16, 2013

It’s funny. We didn’t realize until last night that somehow we got it in our heads that no one from this group could be eliminated. Believe us, there’s at least one person in this foursome we would love to see get eliminated, but somehow we just assumed that Ru would allow all four of them to move to the finals. We don’t quite know why we made that assumption but we were actually a little shocked when someone got eliminated last night. And then we were crushed that it wasn’t the one we wanted to see eliminated.

 

This was a cute idea. Basically, a reading session, with puppets.

 

Everybody did okay, for the most part…

 

Except this nasty ho, who even managed to shock Ru with her shadiness. Although to be fair, now that Coco and Alyssa have gone on to that great drag stage in the sky, the show clearly feels it needs a rivalry to keep the story going, so they’re really ramping up the Roxxxy vs. Jinkx fight. It helps that Roxxxy gives the editors so much to work with.

 

But Alaska once again knocked everyone out with her comedy skills. Or at least, she knocked us out. And Ru. And darling, isn’t that all that matters here?

 

Purr, Neon Diva Kitty.

 

Purr.

 

We once got to hang out behind the scenes at QVC and almost wet our pants when we passed him in the hallway. He was fun and incisive and his surgeon deserves a Nobel prize.

 

Cute.

 

Obviously, Jinkx was going to rule this part of the challenge…

 

But we thought Alaska acquitted herself nicely too.

 

Detox, we’re sorry to say, keeps giving off the half-assed vibe. We’re not sure if we feel that way because she always acts so over it or above it all, or because we’re so consistently disappointed by her output. She never seems to be quite as good as she could be.

 

Enh. Whatever.

 

Alaska

So condragulations once again to Alaska, who really blossomed in this competition once she cut the cord from the toxic Roxxxy and Detox. Loved all three of these looks, but she really nailed it with the Executive Realness.

 

Roxxxy Andrews

Loath as we are to admit it, Roxxxy really is rallying at the end. We’re as over the cape-reveal as anyone can be, but she really did serve it up with these three looks. We just wish she would shut the fuck up for 30 seconds. You ain’t all that, Miss Thing. And every time you open your mouth, your fear of Jinkx comes pouring out, whether you realize it or not.

Having said that …

 

Jinkx Monsoon

This was a TERRIBLE week for Jinkx. The Candy Couture was a decent idea gone bland, but both the Sweet 16 and Executive Realness looks were dated as hell. For all her supposed insecurity, she can be incredibly stubborn about what she’s doing. Ru warned her in the workroom that her looks sounded dated and she didn’t do a thing to course-correct. Roxxy did, and the judges loved her for it. We think Jinkx is the best of the queens this season, but her win is by no means guaranteed.

 

Detox

Jinkx is just lucky that Detox’s looks were equally if not more dated than her own, and that her Candy Couture dress kinda made no sense and just looked awkward on the runway.

 

This was the epic lip synch we expected it to be – and even after it was over, we still held onto the idea that Ru was going to allow them both to stay.

 

On the other hand, giving Jinkx an Yma Sumac song to lip synch was essentially handing the win to her. Like when Latrice was handed “Natural Woman” by Ru with a handsigned note that said “Here you go, girl. Take it and run with it.”

 

Detox gave it everything she had, but it wasn’t really enough for Ru, although it would have been for us. The problem was, like we said, she had a tendency to make you think she wasn’t giving it her all throughout the competition. As much as we like Detox and think she’s got the C, the U, the N, and the T this competition requires, we can’t remember too many “wow” moments in her time on the show.

We still wish it was a 4-queen final. Actually, that’s not true. We wish it was a 3-queen final with Detox in Roxxxy’s place. Bitch can’t shut up soon enough for us.

 

[Stills: tomandlorenzo.com]

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