Marion Cotillard and Dior and Chloé

Posted on April 12, 2013

Oh, Miss Marion. We were so ready to compliment you on this and now we’re afraid we’re forced to withdraw our love (which TOTALLY isn’t as dirty as it sounds).

 

Marion Cotillard attends Maud Fontenoy Foundation Annual Charity Gala in a Christian Dior Top and Chloé  jacket.

Christian Dior Fall 2013 Collection

Chloé Blue Santorini Crepe Wool Jacket

HELLPANTS! RUN AWAY, DARLINGS! SATAN IS WALKING THE EARTH AND HE’S MAKING PANTS!

What a shame. We love every other piece she’s sporting, but those horrible pants just ruin everything. We’re very angry at those pants, right now. Mommy needs a minute.

Okay, we’re back.

Maybe we’re being too hard on those pants. Maybe we just like the jacket, now that we’re thinking about it, because that top obviously isn’t fitting well. And maybe you just can’t pair a cropped jacket with bracelet-length sleeves and a pair of Captain Kirk pants without running into some proportional issues. That jacket cries for skinny pants. Those pants just make us cry.

 

[Photo Credit: Getty, style.com, matchesfashion.com]

    • Vlasta Bubinka

      It is true… some pants send you running for the shelter of some mother’s little helpers.

      • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

        Haiku worthy? Pleaseeeee?

        • Vlasta Bubinka

          ‘kay, but if I get skewered for pretension, I’m sending them to you…

          Bank teller jacket
          Summer in Russia capris
          Hair product flatness

          • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

            Bwahahaa!
            Thank you so much. My weekend may now begin.

    • http://dontmakeitlikeimdumb.blogspot.com/ annabelle archer

      This whole thing just hurts my feelings.
      ‘Marion’ and ‘ill fitting’ do not belong together.

    • http://twitter.com/PhDKnitter marlie

      The top is interesting, but it and the jacket don’t seem to “go”… HAAAAATE the pants. Hate the shoes, too.

    • http://www.facebook.com/conysoledad Constanza Álvarez Espinoza

      Actually, I hate the pants but those shoes… I REALLY hate those shoes.

      • Sarah

        Those shoes are like a sleeveless turtleneck to me. (Sans
        blazer/jacket.) You don’t need full bootie AND peep-toe. It’s just
        silly. It has the effect of making it look like your foot is being born of a leather sheath-womb. Not attractive.

    • sk8tfan

      Those are the cheap pants I bought at Dress Barn to wear when I’m feeling bloated. What are they doing on her?

    • schadenfreudelicious

      Captain Kirk pants that appear to be giving poor Marion quite a case of polterwang in that second to last shot. Pants of Satan indeed!

    • crash1212

      I can tolerate everything going on from the ankle up – if I must – BUT….I CANNOT and WILL NOT sign off on those stupid toe exposing booty things. I COULD sign off on rounding them all up, putting them in a big pile and setting them on fire.

      • ballerinawithagun

        The pants might have been cute with strappy sandals but those boots are horrible with the whole ensemble. I love the bustier.

      • aykhan

        Open toe boots are an abomination.

      • http://www.facebook.com/people/Jessica-Charlotte-Siewierkiewicz/503556621 Jessica Charlotte Siewierkiewi

        Like in Sleeping Beauty, but instead of spindles, you wish to save her from the curse of ugly boots?

      • http://cheekypinky.wordpress.com cheekypinky

        They are The Worst Shoe.

    • teensmom99

      and the shirt cries for the skirt the model is wearing . . .

    • http://twitter.com/lolacestmoi Lola Channing

      those shoes made Delilah, my parakeet, faint.

    • nannypoo

      Well, on the bright side, there’s plenty of room in the crotch in case she wants to store things in there and then she wouldn’t need a purse. See? Lemonade from lemons. The other good news is she didn’t wear the shorts.

    • SugarSnap108

      My hatred of the shoes actually obliterated my hatred of the pants. That’s how much I hate those…peep-toe boots???

    • mhleta

      Ugh, why are you blaming this all on the pants? The pants could have been woven from the vapors of unicorn dreams, but it wouldn’t change the fact that the top and shoes are so so sad.

      • formerlyAnon

        The shoes, my god the shoes.

    • jw_ny

      none of this is working for me…head to peep toes. Together, it all looks so dated and uninspiring.

    • Qitkat

      After all the asshattery earlier this week with jackets and shorts, this is the one look where the shorts might have really worked.

    • Qitkat

      Okay, Disqus, you can cut it out. Right. Now. I just got 3 notifications that go back to October and November of 2011!

      • MilaXX

        I get those insane notifications too.

      • jetpackdino

        Same. Something weird is going on.

      • formerlyAnon

        Today I got notifications for things that appeared in my feed 45 minutes later. (To be fair, I was procrastinating intensely for about half the day, so that might happen all the time and this is just the first time I realized it.)

    • PeaceBang

      The shoes are deeply offensive but nothing here works. My world does not make sense when Marion Cottilard looks this ungood. Hate the make-up, too. Weeping may endureth for the night.

      • http://www.ellenciompi.com/ NurseEllen

        But did joy come in the morning?

    • http://www.facebook.com/crystal.harnden Crystal Harnden

      The top looks like it was made out of duck tape!

      • MilaXX

        Like Michelle & Amanda’s prom dress

    • MilaXX

      Until you mentioned it I liked the top plus jacket, but now I see her torso is just squished into that top. I will not even speak of the Star Trek pants.

    • guest2visits

      None of these pieces should be speaking to each other, never mind piled together on Marion. Weird mix.

    • E. D.

      Yeah, burn the shoes first. I’m not completely hating the pants because she rocks almost everything she wears.

    • jetpackdino

      I totally have to back TLo up on this one. Those pants need to be STOPPED before they kill again.

      Obsessed with that beautiful runway look though.

    • formerlyAnon

      Those pants are hellaciously unflattering. Probably would be even with her hands out of the pockets.

      The top is too small. The shoes are really, really ugly and while I appreciate many “attractively ugly” shoes (and men, for that matter) I just can’t fit these into that category. Poor, ugly little shoes. So we’re left with the jacket. Not a good day for her.

    • YourBaloneyDontGotNoSecondName

      I wish my pants made me look that well hung.

      • drdarke

        Really, YourBaloneyDontGotNoSecondName ! Think she’ll send them to us so we can sport impressive bulges, too…?

        This should read “Marion Cotillard Mistakenly Gets ‘Adequacy Pants’ Meant to be Sent To Tom Cruise – Goes For It Anyway”….

        Yeah, I made a cheap shot at Tom Cruise – sue me.

    • quiltrx

      See, I think I could live with the pants if they weren’t ending abruptly at those HIDDY boots.

    • Imasewsure

      Captain Kirk pants!! Now there is an accurate visual…ugly and accurate…

    • Imasewsure

      Wait in her defense, she is sporting a REAL PURSE rather than some stupid useless clutch. She gets points for that (and for being historically fabulous as well of course).

    • padma sallah

      Never mind the pants. What about those SHOES?!?! They are just terrible!

    • decormaven

      Those aren’t shoes, they’re hooflets. Burn with fire.

    • Aurumgirl

      It’s not just the pants that are made by Satan, it’s also that jacket. The lapels spread so far out that they make her look like a matron. How can such a young woman with a lovely figure be made to look so shapeless by such expensive clothing? And yes, the shoes are awful too.

    • TerryMH

      I get a bit of an 80’s vibe between the blue jacket and the pink lips – not great. But on another topic, didn’t she sport very short bangs not three weeks ago? Now they’re gone. Were they fake? Are these? I’m so confused (and interested as I’m currently growing my own bangs out). – Don’t tell me she’s taking biotin.

    • http://twitter.com/Lily1129 Lily

      I actually really like the pants (on her), but that shirt just doesn’t fit in any capacity. This with a better fitting shirt and different shoes? YES.

    • H3ff

      She looks kind of like Lizzie Moss here.

    • ChaquitaPhilly

      And WHAT is she wearing on her feet?

    • ralish

      I don’t like any of those pieces in any configuration. That jacket had tons of potential though. Love the color and the material loos lovely.

    • http://gabyrippling.tumblr.com/ Gabriella M

      This is that same jacket we saw on Katie Holmes a while back. She actually also wore slightly pegged trousers with it, although she wore a menswear style shirt. I still want that jacket really hard. Lesigh.

      I think this outfit is kind of cute too, actually. The colors are sort of drab though, and I think she shouldn’t have tucked her pants into her shoes. Needed another pop of color somewhere.

    • http://www.ellenciompi.com/ NurseEllen

      I’m so surprised……I was waiting to see “but those SHOES, Marion!” after I scrolled down. The shoes are positively hateful. All open toe boot mocking shoes need to DIE. I don’t mind the pants at all. This could have veered into waiter or usher garb with a less masterful top, but that print is wonderful and the sheen elevates the whole look.

    • msdamselfly

      What? I think it looks beautiful

    • http://twitter.com/TigerLaverada TigerLaverada

      It’s the toe less boots that are Satan’s work, IMO. I can live with the pants, but not with those atrocities on her feet.

      This is a perfect example of the phenomenon of “scroll down fug”.

    • Slowfish57

      Chloe needs to return that shorts suit to the polka band it was stolen from.

    • korilian

      Sometimes I think stars might be able to do better if they didn’t have to throw together their outfits from whatever overpriced brand shit their stylist can scrape together for them.

    • MoHub

      Yep. I was liking it until I saw the pants. What a shame!

    • Tatiana Luján

      I like the pants, but I don’t like the jacket or the top.

    • Elleachaudaucul

      I don’t understand her decision to tuck the pants into the boots. I’m actually ok with the pants or the boots separately but the tucked in thing is weird.

    • MilaXX

      Testing out the app, well done!

    • carnush

      I think the problem is the shoes, actually. Basic, strappy heels would have fixed the pants problem. And I really hate that Dior top.

    • lobsterlen

      If Robert Downey Jr ever asks me to attend a red carpet event in Germany with him I am wearing that wool crepe shorts and blazer. Robert will be wearing his lederhosen. Y’all will mock us but that will be ok. It will be worth the laughs.

      Satin put the shoes with those pants. Those items individuals maybe ok but together are from the 7th Ring of Hell.

    • Pamela Hunt

      Open-toed boots are the most ludicrous thing ever created.