Halle Berry in Roberto Cavalli

Posted on April 10, 2013

We’re sorry, but we have to laugh when the press goes all gaga over a pregnant celebrity and refers to everything she wears as a “baby bump dress” or “showing off her baby bump.”

Please. Get a hold of yourself, your slip is showing, Mary.

Halle Berry attends the premiere of ‘The Call’ in Buenos Aires, Argentina in a Robert Cavalli one-shoulder gown accessorized with Demarco earrings and an Iritdesign ring.

That little ol’ thing? Pfft. Most people fart a gas bubble bigger than that every day. We love how preg lady stars are always directed to cup or hug their mostly non-existent belly. We think some really sarcastic lady star should wear a couture gown on the red carpet with BABY ON BOARD spelled out in sequins. Or maybe she can just point to her belly constantly, in every picture.

Oh, we joke because we love. Congrats to the cray-cray little drama queen and her irritable baby daddy.

The dress looks gorgeous on her; great color, but it is giving her a serious titscrepancy. Those are some fully cantilevered boobs.



[Photo Credit: WireImage]

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  • eowyn_of_rohan

    She should be legally required to wear something in that color once a week. Damn that is a great hue.

  • imperfectlaura

    The boobs kill what is otherwise an okay look.

    • Which is a shame, because they are magnificent boobs when treated well.

      • imperfectlaura

        Absolutely. It’s criminal that they look this bad.

      • MikeW_Vegas

        Even as a gay man, without any interest in them, I fully agree with this statement. Halle has always been my “I’d switch for that”

    • Carly Warnock

      I didn’t notice at first then I couldn’t look away. Sigh. So lopsided.

      • capybara_cafe

        Me too. I was looking at the non-existent bump and the silhouette of the dress, and didn’t notice the boobs at all till it was pointed out. Now cannot unsee ;_;

  • BazoDee

    Damn – how did I miss that titscrepancy

  • Good ol’ Boobs Akimbo. She is the reason the word ‘titscrepancy’ was coined; she is a frequent offender.

    • It’s her love for the one shoulder thing, it always makes her look askew.

  • madge

    as naturally gorgeous as she is, halle seems to be one of the worst titscrepancy offenders. maybe it’s her penchant for one-shouldered looks — they tend to make her look really off-kilter. do a google image search for halle berry one shoulder dress. titscrepancy galore!

    • Qitkat

      Maybe one-shouldered looks *cause* permanent titscrepancy 😀

      Only on this site would I end up typing titscrepancy 3 times today! and teaching my computer the spelling of it 😉

  • All I can see is how her boobs are sliding on the left side. It is extremely distracting and makes me want to what TLo want to do often i.e. “run up to her and yank her boobs in place”

  • MilaXX

    Seriously if we didn’t know she was preggers, we would have thought maybe she ate before the event, if we noticed at all. I think the titscrepancy would have been noticed more than the pea sized baby bump.

  • another_laura

    Truth, T Lo, truth. That’s why we watch the page.

    It’s hard to tear my eyes away from the titscrepancy. However, the dress is gorgeous!

  • teensmom99

    Okay, I really did Laugh Out Loud at fart a gas bubble. And I don’t usually laugh at fart jokes. That’s how funny you guys are.

  • Gorgeous color.

  • dorothea_brooke

    She is lovely in that color. She does seem glow-y but that may be the power of suggestion. Even I glowed a bit when pregnant, and I’m no Halle Berry. I bet her and the pretty Frenchman will make a one gorgeous baby.

  • Little_Olive

    Why does her makeup always looks like a retouch to last night’s?

  • padma sallah

    I’m hoping Katy Perry will take up the “Baby on Board” sequined dress. I dont know if she would do it sarcastically or however but I can see it on her.

    Also, I can’t take my eyes off the lopsided boobs. It’s ruining an other pretty gown in a lovely colour.

    • Katy Perry *would* be the one to do that.

  • It’d be better if she cupped her right boob – held it up to level the pair – and forgot about cupping that tiny zygote.

    • Qitkat

      Thanks for my first out-loud laugh today.

  • gabbilevy

    Great color, but this is pretty prom-y.

  • jw_ny

    askew boobs are not flattering…preggers or not.

  • Pants_are_a_must

    Apparently she’s been wearing a version of this dress for ten years now? Why am I not surprised.

  • Aside from the titscrepancy, I love this dress. She looks great.

    And that bump… That’s no bigger than a mild case of PMS bloating.

  • Trisha26

    Pretty gown, she looks pretty, but that uneven boob level (not cleavage but levelage?) is bizarre. ps Thank you, TLo, for voicing my 2 HATES about pregnant celebs – the “BB” term and the holding/framing with the hands – YIKES!

  • Cathy S

    She looks gorgeous. I didn’t even notice the boobs until you mentioned it. Her bump is cute. Like she just had lunch.

  • MoreShoes

    Finally! A decent dress on her, even with the slight tit problem. Now let’s move on to the hair issue. When is she going to get rid of that bird’s nest?

  • prettybigkitty

    She’s worn this dress before, no? Or at least some semblance thereof?

    • OrigamiRose

      Yes, Lainey did a post the other day recounting Halle’s affection for the one-shoulder look over the years.

  • a_liking

    “Those are some fully cantilevered boobs.” might be my new favorite sentence.

    • I’d love to be able to use “fully cantilevered boobs” in a sentence today. Unfortunately it’s unlikely that anyone will appear in my life today that I could say that about, and I don’t want to alarm the 8 year olds who will show up at my house this afternoon.

  • filmcricket

    To quote the Fug Girls: “I’m showing more than that, and I’m not pregnant.”

    That is a fabulous colour on her though. Very springtime-y. Too bad about the titscrepancy.

    • DebbieLovesShoes

      To quote the Fug Girls: “I’m showing more than that, and I’m not pregnant.” hahahaha. *sigh*. True.

  • Lilyana_F

    Lovely color.

  • IMNAngryLiberal

    One of the trainers at a gym I used to go to was bitching one day about how she was only 4 months pregnant and she looked like a COW! Turns out the problem was that her stomach was no longer concave … not bumped out in any way, just no longer concave between her pretty much non-existent hip bones….I think maybe thin people have a different concept of “bump” than the rest of us.

    • julnyes

      That isn’t thin person opinion. That is a stupid person opinion.

  • To me, her posing to make sure everybody knows that’s a baby-not-of-the-food-variety is pretty par for the course. So often what she wears screams “Look at me! I’m in my mid-40s and I’M STILL HOT!” So now it’s “Look at me! I’m in my mid-40s and I’m as fertile as a gal half my age!”

    That being said, it’s a beautiful color on her and I’d even call this perfection if it weren’t for the titscrepancy.

  • girliecue

    Cantilevered boobs! Brilliant T Lo hilarity, but don’t you just know some designer is seriously going think it’s a great theme for their next collection?

  • jetpackdino

    I hate that color.

    I’ll show myself out.

    • Rebecca Jay

      I hate that color too. It looks like that frosting-in-a-tube stuff.
      But it does match almost perfectly the full-screen Sweet’NLow background TLo’s got going on here.
      That’s kinda neat.

  • surfergirl70

    she loves that silhouette and titscrepancy aside, it loves her.

  • Qitkat

    Not that any of ya’ll care, but my husband detests the term *baby bump*.
    And I would be horrified if my mirror or my stylist didn’t tell me about the titscrepancy. Pretty in purple though.

  • MissAnnieRN

    The titscrepency let’s me know they are real (and they are spectacular! Couldn’t help the Seinfeld reference). Also, if that is a baby bump, I have one too.

    • AnnaleighBelle

      I have two baby bumps in the back…

  • Cousin_Rose

    pretty much perfect

  • bd73

    does anyone wear one shoulder strap without it being a little lopsided? is that possible? plus her boobs have some extra weight going on. i doubt the dress was built to accommodate that. that color is very relaxing.

  • Peeve

    The color looks great on her, but my eyes are continually drawn to the titscrepancy. (However, that may say more about me than about her dress…)

  • formerlyAnon

    “Congrats to the cray-cray little drama queen and her irritable baby daddy.”

    Exactly. Pretty in her dress, but I have to admit I take that for granted from her.

  • Anniebet

    She does look beautiful, if a tad underslung on her right breasticle. Lovely that she’s so happy about a surprise pregnancy.

    And yes, T Lo, you’ve nailed the press for the baby bump craze. It is so fricking annoying. I’m beginning to think celebs are getting preggers cause they know it’s a sure fire way to get publicity, there are so darned many of them dominating the rag sheets. Not referring to Halle though.

  • AnnaleighBelle

    The headlights are pointing in two different directions.

    I don’t care for the dress at all.

  • nannypoo

    I am so sick of the term “baby bump” I could just vomit. What did we call it before? Whatever it was, I’m all for going back to it. Boob issues aside, she looks great.

  • subwaycars

    For once she cannot be described as tacky. Bravo.

  • kathrineb

    I feel the pain of the titscrepancycy comments because my boobs are asymmetrical in size too…but then again this is why I would never wear a dress like this or any dress that cannot conceal a bra.

  • Diego!

    I saw her live on TV (she is visiting my country, I love you Halle!!) and she is gorgeous, I mean, GORGEOUS!!! What a perfect and beautiful face and body she has. And she seems to be very easygoing and down to Earth. I think she is rocking this dress, WERQ!

  • disqus_sZRDWtvvVD

    I want my hair to do that, but it refuses! Her hair + make-up + that color of dress = beautiful.

  • Candigirl1968

    Here’s hoping that with new baby will come some new style. Halle is is gorgeous, but this is all a bit tired.