PR: Arts & Craftiness

Posted on March 29, 2013

We’ll put this challenge on the pile with the rest of them under a sign that says “vaguely explained.” After all, “wearable art” can mean just about anything to anybody, and it’s not like the judges on this show are known for their consistent application of agreed-upon judging criteria.

 

But we didn’t mind so much. Pretty much every team defaulted to considering this the “avant garde” challenge, although it also had elements of unconventional materials challenges and of course, a ready-to-wear component. Essentially, it was about 3 challenges rolled into one, hence the vagueness.

It was made a little more interesting by having the designers match up in new combinations. Stanley and Michelle were a dream team from the start.

 

But these two teams were utter disasters. Layana’s a whiner who has been taught the lesson that the world somehow gives a shit when she whines. Richard is just plain nuts, we don’t care if that’s harsh. He’s had some form of drama queen issue with the last 4 people he’s been teamed with. To be honest, we didn’t quite get what was going on with him last night. We thought he might be burnt out, but he didn’t act like he was burnt out. He just didn’t feel like cooperating. When Tim called him out on his strategizing, it all fell into place. And big ups to Tim for doing the calling out. “None of that silly bullshit here, young man. Get to work.”

 

 

Stanley

So congrats to Stanley, even if you did get all kinds of pissy with us on twitter last night. The dream team was clearly going to win this one, so it pretty much came down to a coin toss at the end. We love this dress, the shape of it, the way it takes a dark print and turns it whimsical, the perfect execution and the extreme simplicity of it, which serves as a call to Michelle’s more elaborate and out-there design:

 

Michelle

We liked this a lot, especially the painted train on the coat. The bubble wrap was a bit too crafty for our tastes, although we admit it looks better than we expected. Probably our biggest issue with this look is that head piece, which takes it from “art” straight to “student work.”

 

 

Layana

Whiny, passive-aggressive and willing to turn the tears on the second she doesn’t get her way. Done with her.

This was, as the judges rightly pointed out, a twisted take on a period costume, but there’s nothing “modern art” about it, even if Helena Bonham Carter would kill to wear it. The print’s nice, we’ll give her that.

 

Daniel

We think this was more than a little overpraised by the judges, but it’s probably the most modern-looking thing he’s sent down that runway, so we guess we don’t blame them. The jacket is beautiful. If only last week’s tear-inducing jacket had been half this good, we might have understood his meltdown.

Speaking of meltdowns, we do think it was a little ungenerous of him to claim he deserved the win, but it certainly wasn’t the horrible betrayal Layana made it out to be. “I FEEL SO BETRAYED!!!!!” Oh, shut the fuck up. You threw Richard under the bus just a couple of days ago, girl. We don’t know who told you you were a special little princess but guess what, honey: the world doesn’t think so. Sack up.

 

Patricia

We actually felt a little bad for Patricia this week. She gets on our nerves, but no one deserved to be paired with that nutjob Richard. If the print was slightly less in-your-face, and if she hadn’t tried to make a second print by hand-painting, and if she didn’t put that thing on her head, we would have called this a winner. In other words, we really like the shape and the concept behind this piece, but she took it too far. As always, editing is her big weakness.

 

Richard

Auf Wiedersehen you pissy bitch. At least we won’t have to hear “It’s EVERYTHING!” every ten minutes each episode. To be honest, we thought the skirt was better than it had a right to be. He actually did do something interesting there. But the basic shape was unflattering and it looked so poorly executed that nothing good could be said about it. We thought his top wasn’t as egregious as the judges said. Not great or anything – and we’re thrilled he was sent home for this mess – but not quite as horrible as they said.

Some will say Layana should have gone home and we don’t argue that point except to say she’s impressed the judges more over this competition than Richard has. Her cumulative score, if there is such a thing, is certainly the higher one.

 

[Photo Credit: Barbara Nitke for Lifetime – Stills: tomandlorenzo.com]

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